I couldn’t believe this was happening. To have private facts of my life thrown in my face—to have this be the way Zach found out—was unbearable. Bile rose in my throat; I tasted its bitterness on the back of my tongue, but I forced it back down.
“Don’t you ever talk about her again,” Zach hissed. “If you so much as say her name …” He let the unspoken threat hang in the air.
“Screw you.” Trent spit blood onto the grass, giving me one last hate-filled glare before walking away.
“Are you okay?” Zach turned to me.
I nodded, unable to speak.
I felt violated—stripped of all my power, my dignity. Trent had been pulling memories out of my head. Intimate memories. What did Zach think of me now? The way Trent had said it was so awful. If I had told Zach myself, at least I could have explained the circumstances. You can still tell him it was only that one time. I pulled back and stared up into Zach’s eyes.
“About what Trent …”
“I know it’s not true,” Zach said before I could finish.
Unwelcome tears welled up inside me.
“Actually … it is.” I kicked at the ground with the toe of my black flats, not wanting to see his face.
“No. It’s not.” Zach tilted my chin up so I was looking at him. “Just because you slept with someone—which really isn’t my business—it doesn’t change how I feel about you,” he finished firmly.
“But it was a mistake. It was after my sister died, and I was all screwed up….” Everything in me was burning. Rage toward Trent. Embarrassment and regret. The emotions I’d pushed down bubbled to the surface.
Even now, I could feel the intense loneliness that had driven me to sleep with Paul. I’d longed to be close to someone, to have that connection. But it had been drunken and meaningless. I remembered how empty I was the next morning.
“You don’t have to explain yourself to me.” Zach stroked my hair, pushing it back from my face. His expression hardened a little then, and I wondered if he felt the remnants of that night inside of me. If he could feel how humiliated I’d been when Paul broke up with me—ashamed that I’d been stupid enough to think he was the right guy.
“I have to say it’s a good thing I’ll never meet the guy; he wouldn’t stand much of a chance if we came toe-to-toe.” Zach ran his thumb down my cheek. “No one is ever going to treat you badly again—not while I’m around.”
The fierceness in Zach’s eyes was enough to make me believe him.
Before I could respond, he bent down and kissed me, pushing all other thoughts out of my mind.
As I walked into the dormitory, I met Adriana coming out of the hall bathroom.
“My, my. What have we been up to, Ms. Phe?” She arched her eyebrow suggestively.
I touched two fingers to my reddened lips. Zach and I must have been kissing in the courtyard for at least a half hour. I took a deep breath. I had been dreading the moment when I would have to back out of our plans, but now seemed as a good a time as any to break the news.
“I got asked to the dance, so I’m not going to be able to do the group date.” The words tumbled out of my mouth, and I waited for the outburst I felt sure was coming.
“Okay,” Adriana replied, shrugging one shoulder.
“I thought you were going to be mad.”
“Why would I be mad at you for having a date?” Adriana laughed. “I’d dump Chace Crawford if Zach asked me out. You are going with Zach, right?”
I smiled, not saying anything.
“Okay. Gossip time, my room, ten minutes,” she ordered.
“I’ll get Toy,” I supplied.
The three of us spent the rest of Friday evening talking and going through Adriana’s clothes to pick out a dress and accessories for Toy.
By lights out we’d agreed to meet around six the next day to get ready for the dance.
At seven on Saturday night, we were sitting in Adriana’s room doing manis and pedis. Toy giggled as I painted her toenails gunmetal gray. “That tickles,” she squealed, her foot jerking in my hand.
“If you don’t hold still, the whole top of your foot is going to look like a postmodern Impressionist art piece,” I warned.
“Primping is more entertaining than I imagined.” She steeled her leg.
“Have you ever had any female friends, Toy?” Adriana asked without sarcasm. In fact, she looked almost concerned.
Toy scrunched up her face. “I guess not.” She shrugged. “I pretty much hung out with my brother and his friends in New York, and ever since I came to Devenish, I’ve been friends with Graham and the guys who are in TechConnect.”
“Well, that all changes this year,” Adriana declared. “You now officially have girlfriends—we’ll do a lot of fun things that guys don’t do.”
“Like what?” Toy asked.
“Dance parties to cheesy eighties music. All-night Sex and the City marathons. Talking about cute guys for hours on end.” Adriana ticked the things off on her fingers.
“I can definitely see the appeal in that last one,” Toy admitted. “I’ve always wanted to have a friend who could teach me how to not be one of the guys.”
“A few tips from me and you’ll have those geeks eating out of your hand. No offense,” Adriana added.
“None taken,” Toy assured her. “Most of the guys I like are geeks. Except for Graham.” She blushed.
An hour later, everyone was dressed, but Adriana was still doing Toy’s makeup. Adriana had put on Santigold—according to her she couldn’t do makeup without a sound track—and she was clicking her black satin heels together in time with the beat.
I ran a hand over my dress, wondering what Zach would say when he saw me in it. The sleeveless ivory shift had a relaxed A-line shape and a high circular neckline with deeply cutaway shoulders. It perfectly showcased my collarbone—a great look for someone like me who had no cleavage to speak of. Since the dress was rather subdued, I had decided to wear my red suede pumps with the outrageously large bow on the back of each heel.
“It’s time for me to go meet Zach,” I declared as the clock clicked over to eight. I’d been watching it in rapt attention, anticipating this moment. I stood up from Adriana’s bed. “You two both look awesome,” I added.
“Just wait until you see the finished product,” Adriana told me as I walked out of the room. “Toy is going to leave Graham speechless.”
“I have no doubt.” I grinned, shutting the door behind me.
As I walked down the hall, my heels clacked against the floor, echoing the rapid beating of my heart. I couldn’t wait to see Zach. By the time I stepped outside, I was what could only be described as giddy. Zach, who was walking up the path toward me, stopped short.
“Wow,” he breathed. Just the reaction I was hoping for.
Chapter Sixteen
“You look unbelievable.” Zach shook his head in awe. “Are you sure you’re not supposed to be meeting someone else out here? Like Tom Cruise?”
“How old do you think I am?” I laughed. “That guy is ancient, not to mention married.”
“Sorry, I don’t know the names of any of the young hot guys.” Zach grinned.
He was flawless in his slim-fitting black suit.
He held his arm out for me, and we linked elbows. I felt so elegant and grown-up: dressed to the nines and walking across this beautiful expanse of campus with the most amazing guy I had ever met.
“So, Persephone Archer—are you liking Devenish?” Zach asked.
“It’s perfect,” I answered him truthfully. He stopped midstep and pulled me to him. I felt warm and slightly light-headed, the way I always felt when he touched me.
“You are perfect,” he replied, leaning down to kiss me.
By the time we made it to the ballroom on the second floor of the SAC, Adriana and Toy were already there. They had probably swept right past while Zach and I were kissing, and I had been so lost in it that I hadn’t noticed.
Toy looked sexy in a nonconf
ormist way. The gray racer-back dress she’d borrowed from Adriana was cut short and extremely tight, but on Toy’s tiny frame it was loosely fitted and hit her just below the knees. The blue heels I’d given her were even more striking since she normally wore flats. Adriana’s red backless Valentino gown was the most gorgeous one in the room. “So where’s Brody?” Zach asked Adriana.
“I don’t know—playing video games with Graham?” She rolled her eyes. “They were supposed to meet us here five minutes ago.”
“There they are.” Toy gave a little excited hop.
The guys were standing in the entrance; Graham was cute in his tux, and even Brody looked nice. His hair was clean and shiny and not hanging in his eyes. The suit jacket also helped him out by camouflaging how skinny he was.
Graham was scanning the crowd on the opposite side of the room, but Brody’s eyes immediately searched out Adriana. He elbowed Graham and pointed to us. As they walked over, I could see the expression on Graham’s face change to one of stunned amazement. He must have just spotted Toy.
“Oh, my God,” he said when he reached us. “You look … I mean …” Graham shook his head at Toy. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in a dress before.” The way he was staring, it probably would have sounded more appropriate for him to say, “I’ve never seen you before.”
“You look great,” Graham added quickly.
“Thanks.” She beamed so brightly you could probably see her from space.
“I’m going to grab something to drink,” Graham announced. “Do you want anything?” He looked straight at Toy.
“Sure. I’ll come with you.”
As they made their way over to the refreshment table, Adriana propped her hand on her hip and stared at Brody expectantly. “Well?” She opened her eyes wide. “Aren’t you going to give me some kind of compliment?”
“You are, hands down, the hottest girl here,” Brody replied.
“I know that.” Adriana rolled her eyes. “I was hoping for something a little more specific. Something about my dress, perhaps.”
“Umm.” Brody tapped his foot, thinking. “Your dress is really sexy?”
“I guess that’s probably the best I’m going to get out of you.” She sighed.
The decorations for the dance were minimal, consisting of a few small tables near the refreshment center. In addition to sodas and punch there was a platter of little sandwiches, and an arrangement of mums that served as a centerpiece. Mrs. Carr was behind the punch bowl—probably stationed there to guard it against would-be spikers. She was staring stonily out across the room while Mr. Carr, beside her, seemed to be carrying on an intense, though rather one-sided, low-voiced argument.
The DJ’s table was in the corner, and the Rihanna song he was playing was not inspiring anyone to dance. Everyone was either milling around or standing in little clumps, talking. Of course the lack of dancing could also be attributed to the presence of several teachers and other adults who stood around the perimeter of the room, looking very chaperone-y. I wasn’t sure who the other adults were, but since I didn’t recognize them, I assumed that they were probably parents of some of the townies.
Sure enough, Zach’s uncle Tripp was standing over by the exit to the balconies. That would suck, I thought, to have your parents watching you and your friends. I had the sudden panicked thought that maybe Zach’s parents were there, and I did another scan of the room. I relaxed when I saw no sign of Grant Redford.
Bouncy blonde Kerry and the red-headed girl from the Pictionary game were by the entrance of the ballroom, giggling about some guy who had come in sporting a tuxedo T-shirt. I was pleased to see Kerry was wearing her standard bubblegum pink. The color was still beyond awful, but after Corinne had torn her down at the SAC, I figured she’d never be seen in it again. I was glad she had more backbone than I’d given her credit for.
Just then, Corinne strolled in, wearing a simple emerald green column that hugged her statuesque curves. She was flanked on either side by nondescript girls who would have been interchangeable if they hadn’t been wearing different dresses. Zach took my hand firmly. Corinne’s pale eyes narrowed when they landed on us, and she stalked off to the back of the room.
“Your sis is real friendly,” Adriana told Zach.
“Yeah, she takes a while to warm up to people,” he conceded. “I’m going to go talk to her for a sec.” Zach squeezed my hand. “If that’s okay?” he asked me softly.
“Sure.” I smiled. If I wanted to be with Zach, I had to accept the fact that he came with some family baggage. It wasn’t like I was angst-free.
As Zach walked away, Adriana gave Brody a pointed look.
“What did I do?” Brody crossed his arms over his chest defensively.
“It’s more what you’re not doing.” Adriana shooed him away. “Go get me a drink or something.”
“As you wish, princess.” Brody bent at the waist in an exaggerated bow. But, of course, he loped off a second later.
“Thank God.” Adriana exhaled loudly. “If anyone thinks I actually came here with Brody as my date, I am going to be mortified.”
“Brody’s not that bad.” I smiled.
Zach was already making his way back over to us, stepping around the few couples who had taken to the dance floor. Two of the dancers were Toy and Graham. I pressed my lips together, trying not to laugh at Graham’s joyful but comically bad water-sprinkler move. Luckily, Toy had fared better in the dance skills department.
“Sorry about that.” Zach slipped his hand back into mine.
“That’s okay.” I gave him a soft kiss on the lips.
“Oh, barf.” Adriana rolled her eyes. “I guess if my only choices are hanging out with you lovebirds or dancing with that epileptic out there, I’m going to have to go with the public humiliation.” Brody had apparently decided that, instead of getting drinks, he was going to get down. He and Graham seemed to be having a can-opener/Roger Rabbit contest. I shook my head in awe. It took real skill to be that bad.
“I sure know how to clear a room, huh?” Zach asked after Adriana walked onto the dance floor. “Do your friends hate me for some reason I don’t know about?”
“No,” I laughed. “They all really like you. We’re probably giving off some kind of couple vibe that’s—” I stopped midsentence. Were we actually a couple? It was probably way too soon to say that.
“There is nothing I would like more than to be coupled with you.” Zach pulled me to him, burrowing his hands in my hair. His face was warm against my cheek. “You look so gorgeous tonight.” Zach’s breath tickled at my ear, sending shivers all through me. “I don’t know if I can resist you.”
“So don’t.” I could barely get the words out; it felt as if desire was filling me up, pushing the air out of my lungs, taking over every inch of my body. Then Zach kissed me so passionately I was afraid a chaperone was going to come over and separate us.
“Umm,” I murmured, when he released me a little. “I have a feeling I am in dire need of a makeup reapplication after that.”
“You don’t need any such thing.” He kissed me again, and the heat in the pit of my stomach spread through me like wildfire.
“Hmm-humph.” A woman with a bland bob haircut stood next to us, her lips pursed and eyebrows raised. I could feel a lecture about “being a lady” coming on. I certainly didn’t want to spend the rest of the night with this woman following my every move.
“Excuse me.” I gave Zach a quick peck on the cheek. “I have to use the restroom.” I made a beeline for the hall, praying the lady wouldn’t decide the toilet was a perfect place to discuss my raging hormones.
I should have been praying for something else entirely. As I stepped out of the bathroom stall a few minutes later, my eyes fell on emerald green satin shoes.
Great. I knew this night was going too smoothly. I steeled myself before looking up. Unlike some extremely tall girls, Corinne was not the least bit bothered by her stature—besides standing ramrod straight, she
was also wearing four-inch heels. Which made her about the same height as Zach. But while he tried to minimize the distance between us by stooping down a little, Corinne was more than happy to lord her vertical advantage over me.
“Listen.” Corinne’s pale eyes bored into mine. “I know that you wormed all this information about us out of Zach. He’s always been naïve and trusting, but apparently ‘young love’ has completely turned his brain to mush.”
“Zach knows he can trust me,” I replied, keeping my voice even. “I would never reveal anything he said.”
“Yeah, right. Till you get bored with him or need something to gossip about.”
I braced myself, staring back into her eyes with all the fierceness I could muster. “I told him I wouldn’t tell anyone, and I won’t. I keep my word.”
“You better.” Corinne leaned in closer. I could almost hear the electricity snapping between us. “Because any one of us can get into your mind, but Zach and Trent are amateurs compared to me. And if you ever, ever tell anyone anything about us, I will visit you in your dreams, and the next day you won’t remember a thing he told you. I will wipe you clean.”
“Okay.” I tried not to sound shaken. “Now you’ve delivered your warning.” I stepped around Corinne and went to the sink to wash my hands.
I had hoped that would signal an end to our conversation, but Corinne drew a long breath and let it out, then followed me to the sink. She had schooled her face into something resembling calm.
“I know you think I’m the devil incarnate,” she told me. “And you have absolutely no reason to believe what I say to you, but I am going to say it anyway. At least that way, when something horrific happens, I can rest easy, knowing I did everything in my power to prevent it.”
She paused as I dried my hands. Obviously she wanted my full attention. Finally, I turned to face her, hand on my hip, and she continued. “You need to end things with Zach. Find some other guy at this school, one who’s more like you.”
“I don’t care about that.” I stared back at her defiantly.
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