by Lisa Suzanne
“A lick of sense?” I tease despite the gravity of my situation.
She shakes her head. “Not a lick.”
“It’s unbelievable to me, too. They don’t even know me anymore, they each see me for two days and are ready to offer me the world? Something isn’t adding up.”
She holds both palms up. “I mean, I didn’t want to be the one to say it, but since you did...you’re right. Something isn’t adding up.”
I try to ignore the blow to my ego, but the more I think about it, the stranger it all becomes. It feels like something’s happening behind the scenes I’m not privy to.
“Well, Chase wants me in Denver right away, and Gavin’s giving me the gift of time since the tour doesn’t start until September. But he said something about getting a new album out by then so I don’t know what that entails. Does it mean we’ll get to see each other? Or will he be working all the time?”
It’s the first time I’ve felt doubtful of either man’s intentions with me, but talking to Rose always helps put things in perspective.
She stands and walks a loop around the fountain in front of us, inspecting it with her eagle eye. “That’s something you’ll have to ask him.”
“You’re right.” I watch her walk around the fountain. “And he actually lives about five minutes from here, so maybe I should go get my answers.”
She stops and looks at me with a nod. “I think that’s a great idea.”
I blow out a breath. “But I don’t know. Every time I think I want to be with Gavin, I remember what it was like with Chase. And every time I think it’s Chase, the way Gavin kisses me with so much passion just hits me at full force. I don’t know how to decide.”
She glances at the roses behind her before she looks back at me. “Maybe if you give it enough time, they’ll make the decision easier for you.”
“And I should just, what, date them both for the time being?”
She shrugs. “Sure. Why not?”
“Because that’s not me!” I can’t help my maniacal laugh. “I don’t know how to juggle two guys. Besides, both are famous in their own fields. Certainly they have fans and if we’re seen out together, people will piece together that I’m the same girl.”
“Then be honest about what you’re doing with both of them.” Her tone isn’t as gentle as it should be, and I realize I’ve been so wrapped up in my own issues that I haven’t given a second thought to the fact that Rose has been incredibly distracted during this entire conversation.
“What’s going on with you?” I ask.
She finally breaks her stare with the roses and the fountain and looks over at me. “Gavin told you Beyond Gold is going on tour?” she asks.
I nod.
“And he wants you to go on tour with them?”
Another nod.
“It’s just...” she pauses then blows out a frustrated breath. “Liam and I have been hanging out a lot—like a lot a lot over the last couple days, and he didn’t even mention to me that there’s an upcoming tour. Not that I thought I’d be invited, but it just felt like maybe it was going somewhere. It’s an awfully big detail to leave out of the conversation.”
I stand and walk over to my friend, tossing an arm around her shoulders. “Oh my God, I didn’t realize. I’m so sorry.”
She shakes her head. “It’s dumb. It shouldn’t bother me.”
“Maybe he just figured you’d find out from me.” I’m grasping at straws here. “Gavin said they just got the offer yesterday. Have you seen him since then?”
“Yeah. He, uh, slept over last night.”
“He slept over? When were you going to tell me this?”
She purses her lips. “As soon as we tackled your drama.”
I try not to feel hurt that she’s calling it drama when it’s my actual life. “Maybe he’s exploring things with you and he wasn’t sure how to tell you yet. They haven’t signed on the dotted line or anything. Maybe I wasn’t supposed to say anything at all.”
“Or maybe he isn’t into me the same way I’m into him.”
“Rose, it’s only been three days.”
She presses her lips together. “That didn’t matter for Gavin.”
“The guy who was my best friend all through high school. The guy who apparently has been in love with me for fourteen years. It’s different.”
She nods. “You’re right.” I can tell she doesn’t believe her words, that she’s just saying them to placate me, but I let it go.
“I’ll get the intel from Gav.”
She glares at me and points a scary finger at my chest. “Don’t you dare say a word to that boy about me and Liam.”
I hold up both hands in surrender. “Okay, okay. I promise. But if he brings it up...”
Her glare deepens, and I cower a little.
“Not. A. Word.”
“Pinkie promise.” I loop my finger through hers and then give her a hug. “I’m gonna go see him. Love you, Rosie Rose.”
“I love you too, Dee Dee. And good luck.”
I shoot her a tight smile and then I’m on my way to the rock star’s house.
It’s quiet outside when I get there, but Gavin’s Land Rover is in the driveway. I park in the same spot on the street I parked in the last time I was here just two days ago, and I walk up to the front door and ring the bell.
I wait a full minute, but there’s no answer.
My heart drops into my stomach as all the possibilities shoot through my mind. His car is in the driveway, so he’s probably home. Right? Why wouldn’t he answer the door? It could be something as simple as he’s out back or in the shower, but for some reason, my mind immediately goes to sex. He’s probably up in that luxurious bedroom of his right now, fucking some girl since I asked him to leave last night.
I know his reputation.
For the first time, part of me wonders whether I’ll always be worried about other women if I decide to give it a try with him. He’s made it clear he only has eyes for me, yet he isn’t answering his door, and he could have his pick of women...so maybe that’s exactly what he decided to do.
He deserves someone else, someone better, someone who will trust that he just didn’t hear the bell instead of someone who immediately jumps to the conclusion that he’s entertaining some other woman.
I turn my back to the door and slide down so I’m sitting on the porch step for a minute, unsure what to do. I debate sending him a text, but that sort of takes the surprise out of my surprise drop by.
And that’s when I see a lone figure running down the street in the distance. My heart races because deep in my bones, I feel it.
It’s him.
And he isn’t wearing a shirt.
Holy mother of God, he isn’t wearing a shirt.
As he runs toward me, it suddenly feels like time slows down. He’s running toward me in slow motion like some cheesy episode of Baywatch. His muscles ripple and a sheen of sweat makes his body shine in the sunlight. He wears just a pair of sunglasses, running shorts, his sneakers, an armband with his phone in it, and some wireless earbuds, and he looks like a delicious hunk of perfection.
When he spots me sitting on his front porch, his face seems to light up with a smile even from behind the sunglasses.
He slows to a walk, makes his way up the driveway, and stops in front of me, chest heaving from the exertion of his run. The muscles in his abdomen flex with every breath he draws in, and I’m glad my eyes are hidden behind my sunglasses because I can’t help but stare at the magic of his abs. I do a mental count, and there’s more than six in his pack. I spot eight clearly defined muscles there, and I nearly need to wipe the drool spilling out the side of my lips.
“Hey,” he says, pulling out his earbuds.
“Hi.” I avert my eyes to his face.
He bends one leg at the knee and holds his foot to stretch his quad. “How was your first day of summer school?”
“Fine. Seems like it’ll be an easy few weeks. Good kids.” I’m speakin
g in phrases rather than sentences, but I can’t seem to pull myself together with a shirtless Gavin Brooks staring down at me. My eyes go to the tattoos on his arms. I haven’t had a chance to inspect them yet, but I suddenly look forward to the prospect of learning the meaning behind each piece of art.
He drops his foot and repeats his stretch on the other side. “I’d ask what you’re doing here, but I don’t care. I’m just glad you’re here.”
I take a deep breath and try to organize my thoughts. “I came because I have questions.”
He raises a brow. “What sorts of questions?”
I wish I could remember. I know I had some earlier when I was talking to Rose because I specifically remember her telling me that they were things I’d have to ask Gavin...but they seem to have vanished from my brain.
He drops his leg and stretches his arms up over his head, giving me an unparalleled view of those perfectly cut abs and the v-shaped muscles that dip into the shorts sitting just a little too low on his hips.
He’s stupid hot.
Ridiculous.
Inhuman.
He bends to one side and then the other, and I force myself to look away so I can remember why I came here.
Oh! The tour. His music. Whether we’ll see each other. Right.
Thank God.
“I know you said I have time to think this through, but what would the tour be like?”
He shrugs as he keeps stretching. “We play a show, travel to the next city, sightsee a little, play a show, and repeat.”
“That’s it?”
“Well, there’s a little more to it.” He sits on the sidewalk in front of me and does some stretches on the ground. “We have press and interviews, meet and greets, appearances. That sort of thing.”
“What’s a typical day like on tour?”
“Typical isn’t really a thing on tour. But in general, on show days we get to the venue no later than four for a sound check. Sometimes we leave and come back, sometimes we stay. We might practice or get shit ready and work out any kinks from the previous show. We might write new music or just sit around playing poker. The opening band plays, and we usually go watch at least half their set, but not always. We do a few pre-show things when it gets close, and then we play. After there’s usually a party at a bar, but it depends on the city.” His legs are together now and he reaches forward to touch his toes, bringing his chest practically down to his knees.
“What about on a non-show day?” I ask, ignoring his body’s flexibility because if I think about it, I’ll forget what we’re talking about.
“Usually there’s travel involved.” He bends one leg at the knee and turns around to stretch his back. “Once we get to a new city, if we don’t have a show or media lined up, we’re free to do whatever we want. Rob checks us into a hotel if we’re in the same place for more than one night, and we usually go explore. It’s gotten trickier since people recognize us now, but we still head out to see the sights. Sometimes Rob books us private tours, sometimes not.” When he finishes talking, he bends the other leg and repeats his stretch on the other side.
I’m just enjoying the show as I try to pay attention to his words.
“I haven’t figured out what the right decision is just yet, but let’s pretend for a second I decide to come with you. What would all that mean for me?” I ask.
“It would mean you do everything I just said with me. You’d be the honorary fifth member of Beyond Gold.” He grins up at me.
“Why me, Gav?” I ask softly.
His brows crinkle down, and I wish I could see what’s in those expressive eyes of his. “What do you mean?”
“Millions of women would kill for the shot at being the honorary fifth member of Beyond Gold. Why do you want it to be me?”
He’s quiet for a minute, like he’s weighing which words to use to answer my question. “It’s always been you, Laney. Half our songs were written because my heart was broken when you cut me out of your life. The other half were written with the hope that someday we’d find our way back to each other. It’s crazy as fuck and I should have moved on by now, but I can’t. My parents always taught me that when you know, you know. And since the day I moved in next door to you, I just knew.”
I stretch my legs out in front of me and cross them at the ankles, making myself comfortable against his front door. “I feel like that’s a really romantic way to see life, but I don’t know how realistic it is.”
“Don’t tell me you’ve turned into a pessimist.” He finishes his stretches and moves to stand. “That was never in your personality.”
I shrug. “When you lose everything the way I did, your optimism sort of packs its bags with the rest of your shit.”
“Well lucky for you, I’ve got enough optimism for both of us. Maybe some will rub off on you.” He grabs a key from some secret pocket in his shorts, and then he sticks his hand out to help me up. When our hands connect, my entire body is filled with an electric charge at his heat. “And that reminds me, I have something for you inside.”
“For me?” I ask, and even I can sense the hopefulness and excitement in my voice.
He chuckles as he drops my hand and unlocks his door. “Follow me.”
CHAPTER TWENTY
He leads me through the entry and into the kitchen, and he grabs a vase from the counter and hands it to me. It’s filled with pale pink gerbera daisies.
“You remembered,” I say softly.
“How could I forget?”
Back when we were sophomores and we went to Homecoming as friends, he’d gotten me the exact same bouquet after I’d told him gerbera daisies in pale pink were my favorite. I’d teased him that all my friends were going to the dance with simple wrist corsages, and he’d overdone it. He didn’t care, though, and he’d done it because he wanted to see me smile.
Then he pulled out a wrist corsage that magically had the exact same shade of smaller pink daisies in it as the huge bouquet. His parents brought the vase over to my house, and I got to look at those flowers for weeks, like they had some magical powers that just wouldn’t allow them to wilt.
Sort of like Gavin’s feelings for me...or mine for Chase, I suppose.
At least mine for Chase up until a few days ago when I found out about the torch Gavin had been holding for me all these years. Not that my feelings for Chase are wilting...but someone else has definitely entered the picture and captured my interest, something that has never happened before.
I set the vase back down on the counter and take a step toward him. I stand on my tiptoes and press a gentle kiss to his mouth.
He sighs softly, and he pulls back first. “Can you give me five minutes to shower?”
I nod, but I keep my mouth shut because if I open it, I’m sure I’ll say something really dumb like can I watch?
“Can I get you anything?”
I shake my head, and he kisses my cheek and runs up the stairs. I take a seat at the kitchen table. A minute later, I hear the front door open, and then Liam walks into the kitchen.
“Delaney Lockwood!” he exclaims when he sees me.
“Liam Ward!” I say, mimicking him.
He laughs. “What are you doing here?”
“Waiting for Gavin. He’s in the shower.”
“And you’re not with him?”
Pink creeps into my cheeks at his question, which is pretty much my nonverbal response to him.
“Oh, are we not there quite yet? Did I stick my foot in my mouth?”
I laugh, and before I can stop myself, I bring up Rose. “Heard you might’ve been participating in activities of that sort with my best friend.” She told me not to talk to Gavin about her...she never said I couldn’t talk to Liam himself about her.
“Yeah,” he says, dropping into the chair across from me and averting his gaze out the window.
“What’s going on there?” I press.
“It’s complicated.” He sighs then turns his gaze back to me. “But you’re here in my house. I
’m supposed to be teasing you.”
“Funny how I turned that right around, isn’t it?”
He smiles. “Same old Dee,” he murmurs.
“The same, but different.”
“Aren’t we all?” He drums his fingers on the table for a beat.
“Be careful with Rose, Liam.”
He nods. “I will.”
“If you need anything...” I trail off, not sure how exactly to tell him that he can talk to me. Can he? Will I keep it from Rose?
“Thanks,” he says, saving me from making it awkward.
“She was pretty pissed when I told her about the tour before you.” I’m taking a risk that she’ll also be pissed I mentioned that to Liam, but I’m just trying to help.
He rolls his head around like he’s stretching his neck. “Yeah, I didn’t know we were telling people yet since we haven’t actually inked the contract.”
“Sorry. I didn’t know you weren’t saying anything.”
“I’ll talk to her.”
“Don’t tell her I mentioned it. She’ll murder me.”
He laughs. “Yeah, she’s a fireball, that one.”
“A spitfire?” I ask.
He shakes his head. “Nope. A ball of fucking fire.” He laughs as he stands. “I have some work to do upstairs. Good seeing you, Dee. Hope to see more of you.”
I smile instead of responding. I want to reciprocate his words, but I’m scared to get any deeper into this band than I’ve already managed to insert myself—in some cases, without even knowing that’s what I was doing.
Once he leaves the room, I eye the flowers sitting in front of me. I spot a little white envelope on a plastic stick. I grab it from the stick and open it, sliding out a card with Gavin’s neat handwriting that I still recognize all these years later.
Laney,
Hope your first day was a success.
And I hope you say yes.
Love,
Gavin
I smile as I stare down at the card. Thinking of me on my first day of summer school was a very sweet gesture, and I find it adorable that he managed to slip in his agenda, too.
He appears in the kitchen just as I’m sliding the card back into the envelope. His hair is still damp from his shower, and regrettably, he’s wearing another plain white t-shirt and jeans. His shirt stretches taut over his broad chest like it’s calling for my hands to touch it. “Well?” he asks.