O. Henry

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by O. Henry


  “Listen, sonny, to some plain talky-­talk. We five are on a lay. I ’ve guaranteed you to be square, and you ’re to come in on the profits equal with the boys, and you ’ve got to help. Two hundred hands on this plantation are expecting to be paid a week’s wages to-­morrow morning. To-­morrow ’s Christmas, and they want to lay off. Says the boss: ‘Work from five to nine in the morning to get a train load of sugar off, and I ’ll pay every man cash down for the week and a day extra.’ They say: ‘Hooray for the boss! It goes.’ He drives to Noo Orleans to-­day, and fetches back the cold dollars. Two thousand and seventy-­four fifty is the amount. I got the figures from a man who talks too much, who got ’em from the bookkeeper. The boss of this plantation thinks he ’s going to pay this wealth to the hands. He ’s got it down wrong; he ’s going to pay it to us. It ’s going to stay in the leisure class, where it belongs. Now, half of this haul goes to me, and the other half the rest of you may divide. Why the difference? I represent the brains. It ’s my scheme. Here ’s the way we ’re going to get it. There ’s some company at supper in the house, but they ’ll leave about nine. They ’ve just happened in for an hour or so. If they don’t go pretty soon, we ’ll work the scheme anyhow. We want all night to get away good with the dollars. They ’re heavy. About nine o’clock Deaf Pete and Blinky ’ll go down the road about a quarter beyond the house, and set fire to a big cane-­field there that the cutters have n’t touched yet. The wind ’s just right to have it roaring in two minutes. The alarm ’ll be given, and every man Jack about the place will be down there in ten minutes, fighting fire. That ’ll leave the money sacks and the women alone in the house for us to handle. You ’ve heard cane burn? Well, there ’s mighty few women can screech loud enough to be heard above its crackling. The thing ’s dead safe. The only danger is in being caught before we can get far enough away with the money. Now, if you——”

  “Boston,” interrupted Whistling Dick, rising to his feet, “T’anks for de grub yous fellers has given me, but I ’ll be movin’ on now.”

  “What do you mean?” asked Boston, also rising.

  “W’y, you can count me outer dis deal. You oughter know that. I ’m on de bum all right enough, but dat other t’ing don’t go wit’ me. Burglary is no good. I ’ll say good night and many t’anks fer——”

  Whistling Dick had moved away a few steps as he spoke, but he stopped very suddenly. Boston had covered him with a short revolver of roomy calibre.

  “Take your seat,” said the tramp leader. “I ’d feel mighty proud of myself if I let you go and spoil the game. You ’ll stick right in this camp until we finish the job. The end of that brick pile is your limit. You go two inches beyond that, and I ’ll have to shoot. Better take it easy, now.”

  “It ’s my way of doin’,” said Whistling Dick. “Easy goes. You can depress de muzzle of dat twelve-­incher, and run ’er back on de trucks. I remains, as de newspapers says, ‘in yer midst.’ ”

  “All right,” said Boston, lowering his piece, as the other returned and took his seat again on a projecting plank in a pile of timber. “Don’t try to leave; that ’s all. I would n’t miss this chance even if I had to shoot an old acquaintance to make it go. I don’t want to hurt anybody specially, but this thousand dollars I ’m going to get will fix me for fair. I ’m going to drop the road, and start a saloon in a little town I know about. I ’m tired of being kicked around.”

  Boston Harry took from his pocket a cheap silver watch, and held it near the fire.

  “It ’s a quarter to nine,” he said. “Pete, you and Blinky start. Go down the road past the house, and fire the cane in a dozen places. Then strike for the levee, and come back on it, instead of the road, so you won’t meet anybody. By the time you get back the men will all be striking out for the fire, and we ’ll break for the house and collar the dollars. Everybody cough up what matches he ’s got.”

  The two surly tramps made a collection of all the matches in the party, Whistling Dick contributing his quota with propitiatory alacrity, and then they departed in the dim starlight in the direction of the road.

  Of the three remaining vagrants, two, Goggles and Indiana Tom, reclined lazily upon convenient lumber and regarded Whistling Dick with undisguised disfavour. Boston, observing that the dissenting recruit was disposed to remain peaceably, relaxed a little of his vigilance. Whistling Dick arose presently and strolled leisurely up and down keeping carefully within the territory assigned him.

  “Dis planter chap,” he said, pausing before Boston Harry, “w’ot makes yer t’ink he ’s got de tin in de house wit’ ’im?”

  “I ’m advised of the facts in the case,” said Boston. “He drove to Noo Orleans and got it, I say, to-­day. Want to change your mind now and come in?”

  “Naw, I was just askin’. Wot kind o’ team did de boss drive?”

  “Pair of grays.”

  “Double surrey?”

  “Yep.”

  “Women folks along?”

  “Wife and kid. Say, what morning paper are you trying to pump news for?”

  “I was just conversin’ to pass de time away. I guess dat team passed me in de road dis evenin’. Dat ’s all.”

  As Whistling Dick put his hands into his pockets and continued his curtailed beat up and down by the fire, he felt the silk stocking he had picked up in the road.

  “Ther bloomin’ little skeezicks,” he muttered, with a grin.

  As he walked up and down he could see, through a sort of natural opening or lane among the trees, the planter’s residence some seventy-­five yards distant. The side of the house toward him exhibited spacious, well-­lighted windows through which a soft radiance streamed, illuminating the broad veranda and some extent of the lawn beneath.

  “What ’s that you said?” asked Boston, sharply.

  “Oh, nuttin’ ’t all,” said Whistling Dick, lounging carelessly, and kicking meditatively at a little stone on the ground.

  “Just as easy,” continued the warbling vagrant softly to himself, “an’ sociable an’ swell an’ sassy, wit’ her ‘Mer-­ry Chris-­mus,’ Wot d’yer t’ink, now!”

  Dinner, two hours late, was being served in the Bellemeade plantation dining-­room.

  The dining-­room and all its appurtenances spoke of an old regime that was here continued rather than suggested to the memory. The plate was rich to the extent that its age and quaintness alone saved it from being showy; there were interesting names signed in the corners of the pictures on the walls; the viands were of the kind that bring a shine into the eyes of gourmets. The service was swift, silent, lavish, as in the days when the waiters were assets like the plate. The names by which the planter’s family and their visitors addressed one another were historic in the annals of two nations. Their manners and conversation had that most difficult kind of ease—the kind that still preserves punctilio. The planter himself seemed to be the dynamo that generated the larger portion of the gaiety and wit. The younger ones at the board found it more than difficult to turn back on him his guns of raillery and banter. It is true, the young men attempted to storm his works repeatedly, incited by the hope of gaining the approbation of their fair companions; but even when they sped a well-­aimed shaft, the planter forced them to feel defeat by the tremendous discomfiting thunder of the laughter with which he accompanied his retorts. At the head of the table, serene, matronly, benevolent, reigned the mistress of the house, placing here and there the right smile, the right word, the encouraging glance.

  The talk of the party was too desultory, too evanescent to follow, but at last they came to the subject of the tramp nuisance, one that had of late vexed the plantations for many miles around. The planter seized the occasion to direct his good-­natured fire of raillery at the mistress, accusing her of encouraging the plague. “They swarm up and down the river every winter,” he said. “They overrun New Orleans, and we catch the surplus, which is generally the
worst part. And, a day or two ago, Madame New Orleans, suddenly discovering that she can’t go shopping without brushing her skirts against great rows of the vagabonds sunning themselves on the banquettes, says to the police: ‘Catch ’em all,’ and the police catch a dozen or two, and the remaining three or four thousand overflow up and down the levees, and madame there”—pointing tragically with the carving-­knife at her—“feeds them. They won’t work; they defy my overseers, and they make friends with my dogs; and you, madame, feed them before my eyes, and intimidate me when I would interfere. Tell us, please, how many to-­day did you thus incite to future laziness and depredation?”

  “Six, I think,” said madame, with a reflective smile; “but you know two of them offered to work, for you heard them yourself.”

  The planter’s disconcerting laugh rang out again.

  “Yes, at their own trades. And one was an artificial-­flower maker, and the other a glass-­blower. Oh, they were looking for work! Not a hand would they consent to lift to labour of any other kind.”

  “And another one,” continued the soft-­hearted mistress, “used quite good language. It was really extraordinary for one of his class. And he carried a watch. And had lived in Boston. I don’t believe they are all bad. They have always seemed to me to rather lack development. I always look upon them as children with whom wisdom has remained at a standstill while whiskers have continued to grow. We passed one this evening as we were driving home who had a face as good as it was incompetent. He was whistling the intermezzo from ‘Cavalleria’ and blowing the spirit of Mascagni himself into it.”

  A bright-­eyed young girl who sat at the left of the mistress leaned over, and said in a confidential undertone:

  “I wonder, mamma, if that tramp we passed on the road found my stocking, and do you think he will hang it up to-­night? Now I can hang up but one. Do you know why I wanted a new pair of silk stockings when I have plenty? Well, old Aunt Judy says, if you hang up two that have never been worn, Santa Claus will fill one with good things, and Monsieur Pambe will place in the other payment for all the words you have spoken—good or bad—on the day before Christmas. That ’s why I ’ve been unusually nice and polite to everyone to-­day. Monsieur Pambe, you know, is a witch gentleman; he ——”

  The words of the young girl were interrupted by a startling thing.

  Like the wraith of some burned-­out shooting star, a black streak came crashing through the window-­pane and upon the table, where it shivered into fragments a dozen pieces of crystal and china ware, and then glanced between the heads of the guests to the wall, imprinting therein a deep, round indentation, at which, to-­day, the visitor to Bellemeade marvels as he gazes upon it and listens to this tale as it is told.

  The women screamed in many keys, and the men sprang to their feet, and would have laid their hands upon their swords had not the verities of chronology forbidden.

  The planter was the first to act; he sprang to the intruding missile, and held it up to view.

  “By Jupiter!” he cried. “A meteoric shower of hosiery! Has communication at last been established with Mars?”

  “I should say—ahem!—Venus,” ventured a young-­gentleman visitor, looking hopefully for approbation toward the unresponsive young-­lady visitors.

  The planter held at arm’s length the unceremonious visitor—a long dangling black stocking. “It ’s loaded,” he announced.

  As he spoke he reversed the stocking, holding it by the toe, and down from it dropped a roundish stone, wrapped about by a piece of yellowish paper. “Now for the first interstellar message of the century!” he cried; and nodding to the company, who had crowded about him, he adjusted his glasses with provoking deliberation, and examined it closely. When he finished, he had changed from the jolly host to the practical, decisive man of business. He immediately struck a bell, and said to the silent-­footed mulatto man who responded: “Go and tell Mr. Wesley to get Reeves and Maurice and about ten stout hands they can rely upon, and come to the hall door at once. Tell him to have the men arm themselves, and bring plenty of ropes and plough lines. Tell him to hurry.” And then he read aloud from the paper these words:

  TO THE GENT OF DE HOUS:

  Dere is five tuff hoboes xcept meself in the vaken lot near de road war de old brick piles is. Dey got me stuck up wid a gun see and I taken dis means of comunikaten. 2 of der lads is gone down to set fire to de cain field below de hous and when yous fellers goes to turn de hoes on it de hole gang is goin to rob de hous of de money yoo gotto pay off wit say git a move on ye say de kid dropt dis sock in der rode tel her mery crismus de same as she told me. Ketch de bums down de rode first and den sen a relefe core to get me out of soke youres truly,

  WHISTLEN DICK.

  There was some quiet, but rapid, manœuvring at Bellemeade during the ensuing half hour, which ended in five disgusted and sullen tramps being captured, and locked securely in an outhouse pending the coming of the morning and retribution. For another result, the visiting young gentlemen had secured the unqualified worship of the visiting young ladies by their distinguished and heroic conduct. For still another, behold Whistling Dick, the hero, seated at the planter’s table, feasting upon viands his experience had never before included, and waited upon by admiring femininity in shapes of such beauty and “swellness” that even his ever-­full mouth could scarcely prevent him from whistling. He was made to disclose in detail his adventure with the evil gang of Boston Harry, and how he cunningly wrote the note and wrapped it around the stone and placed it in the toe of the stocking, and, watching his chance, sent it silently, with a wonderful centrifugal momentum, like a comet, at one of the big lighted windows of the dining-­room.

  The planter vowed that the wanderer should wander no more; that his was a goodness and an honesty that should be rewarded, and that a debt of gratitude had been made that must be paid; for had he not saved them from a doubtless imminent loss, and maybe a greater calamity? He assured Whistling Dick that he might consider himself a charge upon the honour of Bellemeade; that a position suited to his powers would be found for him at once, and hinted that the way would be heartily smoothed for him to rise to as high places of emolument and trust as the plantation afforded.

  But now, they said, he must be weary, and the immediate thing to consider was rest and sleep. So the mistress spoke to a servant, and Whistling Dick was conducted to a room in the wing of the house occupied by the servants. To this room, in a few minutes, was brought a portable tin bathtub filled with water, which was placed on a piece of oiled cloth upon the floor. There the vagrant was left to pass the night.

  By the light of a candle he examined the room. A bed, with the covers neatly turned back, revealed snowy pillows and sheets. A worn, but clean, red carpet covered the floor. There was a dresser with a beveled mirror, a washstand with a flowered bowl and pitcher; the two or three chairs were softly upholstered. A little table held books, papers, and a day-­old cluster of roses in a jar. There were towels on a rack and soap in a white dish.

  Whistling Dick set his candle on a chair and placed his hat carefully under the table. After satisfying what we must suppose to have been his curiosity by a sober scrutiny, he removed his coat, folded it, and laid it upon the floor, near the wall, as far as possible from the unused bathtub. Taking his coat for a pillow, he stretched himself luxuriously upon the carpet.

  When, on Christmas morning, the first streaks of dawn broke above the marshes, Whistling Dick awoke, and reached instinctively for his hat. Then he remembered that the skirts of Fortune had swept him into their folds on the night previous, and he went to the window and raised it, to let the fresh breath of the morning cool his brow and fix the yet dream-­like memory of his good luck within his brain.

  As he stood there, certain dread and ominous sounds pierced the fearful hollow of his ear.

  The force of plantation workers, eager to complete the shortened task allotted to th
em, were all astir. The mighty din of the ogre Labour shook the earth, and the poor tattered and forever disguised Prince in search of his fortune held tight to the window-­sill even in the enchanted castle, and trembled.

  Already from the bosom of the mill came the thunder of rolling barrels of sugar, and (prison-­like sounds) there was a great rattling of chains as the mules were harried with stimulant imprecations to their places by the waggon-­tongues. A little vicious “dummy” engine, with a train of flat cars in tow, stewed and fumed on the plantation tap of the narrow-­gauge railroad, and a toiling, hurrying, hallooing stream of workers were dimly seen in the half darkness loading the train with the weekly output of sugar. Here was a poem; an epic—nay, a tragedy—with work, the curse of the world, for its theme.

  The December air was frosty, but the sweat broke out upon Whistling Dick’s face. He thrust his head out of the window, and looked down. Fifteen feet below him, against the wall of the house, he could make out that a border of flowers grew, and by that token he overhung a bed of soft earth.

  Softly as a burglar goes, he clambered out upon the sill, lowered himself until he hung by his hands alone, and then dropped safely. No one seemed to be about upon this side of the house. He dodged low, and skimmed swiftly across the yard to the low fence. It was an easy matter to vault this, for a terror urged him such as lifts the gazelle over the thorn bush when the lion pursues. A crash through the dew-­drenched weeds on the roadside, a clutching, slippery rush up the grassy side of the levee to the footpath at the summit, and—he was free!

  The east was blushing and brightening. The wind, himself a vagrant rover, saluted his brother upon the cheek. Some wild geese, high above, gave cry. A rabbit skipped along the path before him, free to turn to the right or to the left as his mood should send him. The river slid past, and certainly no one could tell the ultimate abiding place of its waters.

 

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