by Juno Rushdan
“You’re nothing if not a man of your word. I trust you. I love you. And I know that no matter what, you’ll come back for me.”
“You better believe it.”
Epilogue
Northern Virginia
Three Weeks Later
Kit raised her glass of club soda to the Gray Box crew seated with her at the table in a private room in Rocky’s Bar.
“Welcome home, Knox!” Everyone toasted.
Knox Cody grinned back and drank as well.
Kit couldn’t help thinking how he looked like Captain America. Wholesome, handsome—sexy, with the distinct possibility of being deadly.
But no one trumped Castle in her eyes.
Castle threw his arm around her, relaxing back in his seat beside her.
Knox stood up. “It’s good to finally be home, despite the circumstances. I know everyone is nervous about the current situation.”
Current situation was code for shitstorm rolling through the Gray Box. Castle had kept Sanborn’s ugly secrets. He couldn’t bring himself to air all the dirty laundry.
In the end, Castle blamed Khan for everything. The anthrax plot targeting a water plant. Z-1984. The deaths of Director Pomeroy, Senator Boswell, and even Sanborn. Bravo and his team were made to look like Khan’s accomplices.
And the Gray Box got their win. The real anthrax device had been recovered and a high-ranking terrorist had been eliminated.
The truth about the director of a covert organization going rogue and the unavoidable fallout would’ve been too big for any agency to survive.
Somehow, Castle understood Sanborn’s motives, even if he despised his methods, and still loved him for all the good he’d done. Castle felt obligated to share the truth with his team. There was a mixed bag of positions on the matter, but they all seemed determined to stay quiet.
Whether Castle had made the right choice, Kit didn’t know, but she saw how it plagued him, the burden he carried. He was the toughest man she knew, his strength, his determination, but his grief shredded her. He didn’t need her judgment, only her support, and she would give him that and everything she had with an open heart.
The one thing Kit had no reservations about had been Castle’s decision to deliberately expose the Gray Box.
It had been too much unchecked power for one man and too easy for Pomeroy and Boswell to divert their black budget funding. The only way to prevent the same mistakes from happening again was to tell the world that a secret, deep-state intelligence agency existed.
Now the Gray Box was public knowledge. Out in the light, where it had to be held accountable.
“I have some hearings to attend,” Knox said, “but I’m going to get our home straightened out. We might be closed right now, but the doors will open again.”
“You mean if we get a favorable review by the U.S. Senate Select Committee on Intelligence, right?” Ares asked.
“We will get a favorable review,” Knox said with such confidence it was staggering.
Apparently, he was Mr. Sunshine and Rainbows about it.
“I welcome the hearings. It’s time the intelligence community and the public knew about us. We belong in the system of checks and balances. We’ve gone ungoverned too long.”
“Well, let’s hear your speech after they decide to never reopen our doors and sack you,” Alistair said.
“It’s not as if the committee’s house is in order,” Knox added. “They’re not in the most advantageous position from which to judge.”
When he returned, Knox had leaked files that Sanborn had waiting for him about Lee Pomeroy, Ed Boswell, and the sitting president. The bioweapons project had been splashed all over the news. Important heads were rolling, and the impeachment process was getting started.
“Don’t count on me to come back,” Castle said. “I need some time to see what else is out there for me.” He tightened his arm around Kit and tugged until she was seated on his lap.
“Oh, come on,” Reece said. “You can’t abandon us. One team. One fight.”
Castle shook his head. “I don’t see things the way I once did. Too much happened with me. With Sanborn.”
A deafening silence settled over the table. Gazes fell. No one moved. Tension pulsed around the room.
Knox set his glass down and rubbed his chin. “I’m sorry I wasn’t here for you all, for you, Castle. After Sanborn’s funeral, I know you came together, shared your shock, your anger, your grief. Right now, it’s easy to only focus on the things Sanborn did wrong, the mistakes he made, but I don’t want us to forget his sacrifices and the many things he did right. He brought us all together, for one.” His voice cracked and he cleared his throat. “This transition has been hard. Painful. Many of you are still hurting. It’ll take time to heal. To restore your faith that we’re on the right path. I assure you we are. And together, as a team, as a family, we’ll get through this and move on.”
Doc scooted her chair back, visibly shaken, and ran to the bathroom.
Recovery was what everyone needed, but Doc didn’t appear close to healing. There were dark circles under her eyes as if she hadn’t been sleeping and had lost weight since Kit had last seen her.
Maddox rose and went after Doc.
Reaper leaned over to Willow and said, “You should go to the bathroom.”
“Why? I don’t have to pee.”
“They’re in there talking, not tinkling.”
Willow nodded and excused herself.
Concern was etched on the faces around the table. They were a tight-knit bunch. They all sacrificed a lot to do their job and seemed to need each other to get through it.
Kit was not sipping the government Kool-Aid, and Sanborn had proven how dangerous shadowy organizations could be, but she also no longer looked at the people seated beside her through a binary lens.
Kit leaned against Castle. “Do you think it’s too soon for me to stick my nose in?” she murmured.
Doc had been sympathetic and warm as she’d helped Kit plan the memorial service for the Outliers. A selfless act of kindness. Kit wanted to be there for her now, but the subject was sensitive, delicate, and she didn’t want to intrude.
“Nope.” He patted her leg. “Have at it.”
Kit took a shaky breath and joined the ladies in the restroom.
Doc was huddled over a sink, taking deep breaths, doing her best not to cry. Maddox was beside her, rubbing Doc’s back. Willow stood off to the side, looking a bit at a loss.
“How do I move on when the problem is me?” Doc shrieked. “Every single guy I pick is trouble. I’m a magnet for horrible men.”
“This thing with Sanborn is a unique situation,” Maddox said. “It’s been a terrible blow to all of us, but we know how much you cared about him.”
“The more I care about a man, the worse it is.” Doc sniffled. “My ex-husband used to beat me. He was a deputy at the sheriff’s department and no one did a damn thing about it. Not until he cracked my skull with a pipe. I have a steel plate in my head now. No sense of smell. I’ve been using the same shampoo and wearing the same stupid perfume since I was twenty-four because I remember what those smelled like.”
Kit rocked back, slack-jawed and horrified. “Oh, Doc.” She put a hand on her shoulder.
“That’s horrible,” Willow said.
“I was sitting in Italy for four days like a fool waiting for Sanborn. Waiting to marry him.” Tears leaked from her eyes and Willow handed her toilet paper. “I need to change so my life can change.”
“Change how?” Maddox asked, questions swimming in her eyes.
“I don’t know.” Doc shrugged. “Learn to fight. Shoot a gun. Something.”
Maddox smiled. “I can help with that.”
“I can help too,” Kit chimed in. “Not with fighting. We could take a girls’ trip, like the Real Ho
usewives do, but less drama and more fun. I can hire a private jet and we could go anywhere you want.”
Doc gave a surprised chuckle and the tension in the room deflated.
“How rich are you?” Maddox asked.
“Eh. Comfortable.” Kit didn’t like to brag.
Doc extended her arms for a hug and Maddox and Willow joined her. “Get in here,” she said to Kit.
She joined the huddle, happy to have made the smallest difference. After losing the Outliers, Kit hadn’t thought she’d open herself to new friendships, forge a new family. For the first time, she was hopeful.
Doc fixed her makeup, and they left the restroom together, chatting until Kit spotted Castle standing alone near the bar. He was so tall, his shoulders so broad, he looked as if he could handle anything, almost invincible. Castle hid his pain well in front of the others, but she knew he was suffering.
Kit peeled away from the ladies and went to him. “Tell me,” she said in a low voice, running her hand up his back.
Castle turned and pulled her against the front of his body. She wrapped both arms around his waist, loving the solid bulk of him.
“Tell you what?”
She lifted onto the balls of her feet and rubbed his furrowed brow. “What you’re thinking.”
“I needed a break. That’s all.”
“I thought you wanted to be here, to see everyone.”
“I did. I do. But I can’t be around them without thinking about…”
Sanborn. The man was haunting them. What Kit wouldn’t give to exorcise him, to erase Castle’s pain. It was going to take time, and day by day it would get better, easier.
“Seeing Knox makes it worse. They’re my family. I love them. I just wish it didn’t hurt like hell to be around them.”
Her heart pinched under a surge of emotions. She wanted nothing more than to spirit him away to some tropical island where they didn’t have to worry about anything besides what to have for dinner and in what position to make love. Someplace where they’d be safe.
“I’m a mess.” He shuttered his eyes for a second. “The foundation of so much that I once believed in feels like it was built on sand. Nothing makes sense. Except being with you.” He picked her up, bringing them nose to nose, and she wrapped her legs around his waist. The move was intimate and usually reserved for private moments. “You’re the best thing in my life. I love you, Kit-Kat. That’s the one thing I don’t question.”
She searched his eyes and saw how much he meant it. The intensity of his love.
Castle would sacrifice anything for her. Of that, she was certain.
“I love you more,” she said in a teasing tone that brought a small smile to his face.
They’d already figured out their feelings for each other. And it was official, they were living together. He’d even asked on bended knee, offering her a box that contained all the security codes.
He was the first man to keep his word, not lie to her but protect her. There wasn’t anything she wouldn’t do for him.
Kit melted against Castle. “What do you need, right now?”
He pressed her back to the wall, anchoring her body, and cupped her face in his warm, strong hands. Her stomach squeezed at the tenderness of it.
“To get out of here with you.”
“Okay. Take me home and make us a big bowl of pasta. Then we can come up with a creative way to work it off.”
He gave a low, husky chuckle. “You’re perfect for me. Do you know that?”
She kissed him, hard and long, pouring her heart into it. “Don’t you ever forget it.”
Acknowledgments
Thank you to the men and women who fight to protect our freedom. Your sacrifices are appreciated.
A huge thank you, hugs, and kisses to my husband and children for their patience and understanding. Writing a book is a time-consuming, solitary process. I wouldn’t have been able to do this without the encouragement of my family.
Thank you to my incredible editor, Mary Altman, for your insight and support with this series.
Sara Megibow, you are a fantastic agent, friend, and advisor. Thank you for everything.
To the entire team at Sourcebooks, thank you for bringing the Final Hour series to readers.
Finally, thanks to every reader for picking up this book and for opening your heart to my characters. Your support means the world to me.
About the Author
Juno Rushdan is the award-winning author of steamy, action-packed romantic thrillers that keep you on the edge of your seat. She writes about kick-ass heroes and strong heroines fighting for their lives as well as their happily-ever-afters. As a veteran Air Force intelligence officer, she uses her background supporting special forces to craft realistic stories. Juno currently lives in the DC area with her patient husband, two rambunctious kids, and a spoiled rescue dog.
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