As her competitive spirit kicked in, Sierra turned to face the middle seat and said, “Tim, how do you say ‘river rafting’ in sign language?”
Tim thought a moment and then said, “I don’t know. I’d probably sign it like this. This is ‘river,’ and then I’d spell ‘raft.’ ” His fingers moved quickly as he spelled the word.
“Do that slowly,” Sierra said, trying to imitate the letters with her fingers in the air. “Is this an ‘r’?”
“Like this,” Tim said, reaching over and readjusting the way she had her first two fingers crossed.
Sierra smiled. She knew she had just scored a point. Tim had touched her.
As quickly as the thrill of scoring came over Sierra, it left. This was Jana. They had competed for years in school and in sports but never when it came to guys. It felt different with guys, like it was unfair, because in relationships a person’s heart and soul were involved. Sierra didn’t like what she was feeling. She turned back around in her seat just in time to see Gregg pull into a gravel driveway and park the car in front of a log cabin. To the right was a sign carved in wood that said, “Mountain Bob’s River Rafts.”
“Everybody out,” Gregg said. Then, turning to Jana, he grinned and said, “Get ready to have an especially good time.”
Sierra hoped that didn’t mean Gregg was planning to topple their raft or some other such practical joke.
They were about to walk toward the office when Jana grabbed Sierra’s arm and pulled her back behind the large Suburban. “Look!” Jana squeaked.
Sierra looked around the side of the car. Then she turned back to face her friend, just as red-faced as Jana was. “It’s Danny!” Sierra said. “What’s he doing here?”
“I don’t know, but I’m not ready to face him.”
“You’re not ready to face him?” Sierra said. “What about me? I’m the one he watched doing a little star dance on the dock last night.”
Gregg apparently noticed the girls weren’t with them, and he came back to get them. “What’s going on?”
“What’s Danny doing here?” Jana whispered.
Gregg looked over his shoulder and gave a friendly wave to Danny. “Mom invited him. He’s your surprise.”
“My surprise? Why would Mom invite him?”
Gregg shrugged. “She sent me over to their house this morning, and I was supposed to ask him to come rafting with us.”
Jana gave Sierra a look of agony and said, “This is just like my mother! I’m sure she thought that if she arranged my social life, I wouldn’t have any reason to sneak out in search of my own adventure. She’s done this our whole lives, Gregg, have you noticed? She organizes everything to the last detail—even this.”
Sierra knew her mom would never do something like this to ensure that Sierra had a budding social life. But then, Sierra’s mom had never been as concerned about Sierra’s social life as Jana’s mom apparently was. Or at least as of last night.
“You’re making a big deal out of nothing,” Gregg said without a pinch of understanding or patience in his voice. “Now, are you coming in or not? You can spend the whole day waiting for us in the car if you’re going to act like this.”
Jana straightened her shoulders and put on a fierce expression. “Don’t treat me like that, Gregg.”
“Don’t act like that.”
“You don’t understand.”
“You’re right. I don’t. There. End of argument. Now, are you coming or not?”
Jana brushed past Gregg, bumping his arm on purpose as she strode ahead of them to the porch where Danny stood talking to Tim. Sierra was about to march after her when Gregg caught her by the arm and held her back a minute. “Why don’t we give her a chance to get her feet wet?” he said in a gentle voice. “You know, my parents have been kind of concerned about her being so slow to start liking guys. They don’t want her to date yet, but they like Danny and they want to encourage this relationship.”
“Then why were you so rude to her?” Sierra challenged, pulling her arm from his grasp.
“That’s the way we are. You know that. And you can’t tell me you and Wesley don’t act the same way sometimes.”
Sierra looked away from Gregg and his expressive eyes. The truth was, she and Wesley had had their moments. And she and Tawni had tiffs all the time.
Sierra calmed down a little, realizing that Gregg was trying to look out for his little sister. Sierra knew all too well that that’s what big brothers did.
“You know what?” Gregg said, leaning closer to Sierra and talking softly. “I’m glad you came this weekend. You’re good for Jana. You’re fun and smart and not nearly as serious as my little sis. I wish you were staying all summer with us.”
“Thanks,” Sierra replied softly. She had to look away from Gregg. His expression and the light in his eyes were so tender. Sierra found she was changing her opinion of him, and she wasn’t sure she wanted to. Especially when she was still feeling drawn to Tim.
With a quick glance back at Gregg, Sierra took off to join Jana and Tim with Danny. Gregg followed her as she walked up to Danny and smiled at him.
“Hi,” Sierra said, stretching out her hand in an effort to appear mature and formal and not at all intimidated by this guy who had spied on her in the starlight. “I’m Sierra.”
His hand was huge, and his grip hurt as he squeezed her hand and shook it. “Danny,” he responded.
Sierra tried not to stare. He was even more buff up close in the daylight. And very good-looking. His hair was almost white, and Sierra wondered if he had it colored that way. She had never seen hair like that on a guy before.
“Are we ready?” Gregg asked.
Sierra noticed that Danny was acting as if nothing had happened the night before on the dock. She wondered what Jana had said to him. Or if she had said anything to him. Perhaps this was all a fresh beginning and nothing needed to be said. Sierra liked that idea.
“I’m ready,” Sierra said, glancing at Tim. “Have you ever been white-water rafting before?”
“No,” he said, falling in step with her as they entered the office to sign up. “I’m looking forward to this.”
“Me too,” Sierra said, smiling her best smile at Tim. It was all she could do not to say, “Will you sit by me?”
“I’ve been before,” Jana said, stepping in between Tim and Sierra while leaving Danny in the dust with Gregg. “There’s only one rapid on this river that’s a challenge. The first time we went down it, I was scared. But the last two times, it seemed less threatening.”
Sierra felt someone tug on the end of her hair. She hated that and turned around with a fierce expression. Danny held a lock of her hair in his hand and wore a sly expression. He waited until Gregg went past them and then said quietly to Sierra, “Did you tell her we met last night?” He looked as if he was enjoying their shared secret.
Sierra held back her shoulders and said, “Yes. And in actuality, we didn’t meet. Not formally.”
“Now we have,” he said, reaching over and touching one of her long curls. “Is this real?”
Sierra jerked away, and with a scowl she said, “Of course it’s real. Is yours?”
“No,” he replied.
Sierra tried not to be surprised by his response. She turned to join the others at the check-in desk, and Danny leaned over and said, “I like your hair.”
She didn’t thank him for the compliment. It felt awkward having this overwhelming, good-looking guy flirting with her. Sierra guessed that Danny didn’t know that Jana had come out last night looking for him, and it was just as well. A guy so cocky and confident shouldn’t have the satisfaction of Jana’s running to meet him when he snapped his fingers.
When Sierra looked up, she saw Jana flirting with Tim. They had been handed life vests, and Jana was helping Tim fasten the front snaps on his. By the way she was giggling and tilting her head, Sierra knew Jana wasn’t acting like her normal, levelheaded self.
Jana’s actions sent Sierra�
�s mind spinning. If only Jana would go back to wanting to be around Danny, then she would leave Tim alone, and Sierra would be free to pursue her little daydream with him. As for Gregg, he would have to keep himself occupied. Although he had been awfully sweet to her when he said he wished she were staying the whole time. Was that merely so she could be with Jana, or was Gregg trying to tell Sierra he liked her?
She felt as if her head might burst from all the sporadic, crazy thoughts bouncing around at an increasing velocity. She was relieved when she was handed a life vest and told to sign a paper and wait out front. At least out in the fresh air she could breathe and hopefully think more clearly.
This is crazy! I’ve never been so perplexed in my life. What’s going on here?
“This way, people!” Mountain Bob, their guide, said, motioning for them to follow him down to the river. He gathered them together on a pebbly inlet in front of a large, gray inflated raft. “How’s everybody today? You all ready for a wild ride?”
Sierra didn’t answer aloud the way the rest of them did. As far as she was concerned, she had been on a wild ride for the past ten minutes. She doubted Mountain Bob had anything on this river that would compare.
13
ierra was wrong. Mountain Bob and his river had plenty to offer. And the friends she was riding the white water with had plenty to offer as well.
First they were instructed to sit on the raft’s bench seats. Sierra climbed in, but before she could turn and give Tim a welcoming smile to come sit next to her, Danny had snuggled right up next to Sierra. Jana stood on the shore adjusting Tim’s life vest for him once again.
“Hey, Danny? It’s Danny, isn’t it?” Mountain Bob asked. “I need you to move back to the last bench. I’m going to have you help me out.”
Danny moved as Mountain Bob said, “That’s it. We’re going to put all the brawn in the back.”
Oh brother!
“Then you probably want all the brains in the front,” Jana said, stepping into the front. “Come on, Tim. That’s us.”
Oh brother and sister!
Sierra thought the overly expressive grin on Jana’s face was comical, but Sierra couldn’t laugh because she would be the only one who saw the humor in the situation. Less than twelve hours ago this same Jana Hill was chanting to Sierra that she would go into the woods and come back with Danny or die trying. Now she had Danny right there, and she was ignoring him and feeding her sudden flourishing interest in Tim. Sierra knew it was all fake. Jana didn’t like Tim. Jana didn’t know what she wanted—beyond being noticed by every guy who came within flirting distance.
What’s going on with you, Jana? Are you trying to qualify for the fickle woman of the year award? Jana’s behavior reminded Sierra of a little silly tongue twister her Granna Mae used to say whenever one of the grandkids was being fickle. “You want what you want when you want it. But once you’ve got what you want, you don’t want it!”
Sierra could see how easy it would be to get caught up in the flirting thing, especially with her competitive nature. But she wanted to be removed from all the guy-girl dynamics whirling around their raft. She had a feeling the day would be more fun if she were.
Gregg slipped into the raft and teasingly said to Sierra, “Pardon me, is this seat taken?”
“All yours,” Sierra said.
“I guess they’re putting brawn in the back and brains in the front,” Gregg said, smiling at Sierra. “That leaves beauty for the middle row, which is obviously why they put you here.”
“Awww,” Mountain Bob said, pushing them off into the gently gurgling river. “We have a poet on board.” He hoisted himself into the raft and took his place behind Sierra. Tapping her on the shoulder, Bob asked, “Are you two going together?”
“No!” Sierra croaked.
“Well,” Gregg said, “there could be worse plagues in life.”
Sierra laughed. The situation felt so foreign. Flirting? Pairing up? Being labeled “going together” simply because Gregg said something nice?
Fortunately, Mountain Bob didn’t ask any more questions. Instead, he started to bark instructions. Everyone had a paddle, and everyone was expected to use it when the time came. He had them practice paddling forward for speed, back paddling to slow the raft, and paddling on either side to steer the great rubbery beast that was quickly transporting them down the river.
Sierra had carried her baseball cap with her and laid it on the bottom of the raft when they got in. The way they were paddling, the raft floor already was wet. Sierra scooped up the wet cap and shoved it on her head. As the others paddled, Sierra struggled with her hair, trying to convince the majority of her blond mop to come out the open loop in the back of the hat. A few renegade tendrils in the front refused to participate. She gave up and let them hang down.
As soon as she picked up a paddle, she felt someone messing with her ponytail. She spun around and let out an “ouch” when several of the strands were yanked out as she turned. “Do you mind?” she snapped at Danny.
He pulled his hand away and looked at her sheepishly. “I was trying to help. You had a bunch of hair caught in the back there.”
“You did,” Mountain Bob concurred with a nod. “I saw it.”
Sierra turned back to her designated position. She didn’t like Danny touching her hair. The physical contact with a guy who seemed to like her was new to her. New and not completely comfortable.
Comfortable. That was the feeling that was missing. She was comfortable in most situations she ventured into, but on this trip she felt less and less comfortable with herself and with the people she was around.
Bob directed them to stop paddling and to let the raft float through the calm waters on this stretch of the river. Sierra laid her paddle across her knees and drew in a deep breath.
For the first time she paid attention to the beautiful scenery around them. This section of the river cut a calm course through a jagged, dramatic canyon with tree-studded sides that rose far above them to the bright blue sky. The raft bobbed along comfortably, letting the water carry it, and Sierra loved the sensation. She wished she could calm herself down enough to float through this weekend and let the Holy Spirit carry her effortlessly. She seemed to have paddled so hard to get away from where this river was taking her.
Why can’t I relax and just float through life like this? Why all the ups and downs? Why can’t it all be effortless like this?
Sierra soon found out that life may be a river, but it’s not all a leisurely float. The section through the canyon may have been a slow and effortless ride, but no sooner were they out of the shadow of the great cliffs than the river took a turn to the right, and Mountain Bob instructed them to get their paddles ready. On his command, they were to paddle with all their might.
Yes, life consisted of whirlpools, pockets of dead water, and rapids. It was never the same for very long but always changing. She was changing too. Sometimes the best choice was to sit still and let circumstances take her onward. Other times, it was up to her to paddle for all she was worth.
“And now!” Mountain Bob yelled.
Sierra dug her paddle into the water and gave it all she had. The raft flexed its way over the bumpy river current and bounced into a large boulder. Mountain Bob pushed off from the boulder and yelled for them to keep paddling.
The nose of the raft lifted into the air. Underneath her feet Sierra could feel the smooth boulders they were jetting over. She stopped paddling and held on to her seat for dear life. Jana screamed as they came down, nose first, into a loud, whirling pocket of white water. The splash doused them all, filling the bottom of the raft with water.
They all paddled as the raft spun around twice before Mountain Bob had them headed in the right direction. As soon as he did, he hollered for them to paddle out toward the middle of the river.
“Great job,” Mountain Bob praised them all as they floated into calmer waters.
That rousing venture paralleled what Sierra’s emotions had bee
n doing the past few days—tossing her up and down and dousing her good.
Mountain Bob began to call out directions again. He wanted the guys on the left to paddle, and he wanted Jana to grab the bail bucket and bail out the bottom of the raft in the front.
“What about me?” Sierra asked.
“You? You sit for the moment.”
Sierra made another mental note that while going down the river of her life, at times she would be still while everyone else was busy with what they were instructed to do. That didn’t mean she was being left out, but that rather, for that place and time, she was supposed to sit.
“Okay,” Mountain Bob called out, “now everyone, including Sierra, paddle—except for Jana. Keep bailing, Jana. Our biggest rapid is just ahead.”
This time they could see the white water before they hit it. Boulders were on either side and one was straight ahead.
“Guys on the left, when I give the word, you dig into it, because we have to get to the right of the boulder as soon as we hit the white stuff. You ready?” Mountain Bob asked.
Sierra could feel her heart pounding. For the first rapid she hadn’t known what to expect. But now that she had experienced the sensation of their raft seemingly spinning out of control and being lifted by the powerful water, she had more respect for what they were about to paddle into.
She bit her lower lip and silently prayed. They hit the white water before they felt anything sensational, but as soon as the raft was all the way into the fray, the frantic water’s noise was so loud they could barely hear Mountain Bob’s instructions.
Sierra thought she heard him tell Jana to stop bailing, but Jana obviously didn’t hear him. When she should have been paddling, she was scooping up water and holding the bucket by the handle over the raft’s side.
Departures: Two Rediscovered Stories of Christy Miller and Sierra Jensen Page 14