by Quin Perin
Oh, hell, yes.
He came with my hand on his throat and my dick in his ass. So hot and tight, convulsing around me. Finally, Dima slumped back against me, pliable in my hold. Clay waiting for me to mold him to my will. My other arm slung around his heaving chest; one more thrust and that was it. Pleasure hit me like a freight train, stripping me of all senses, balls drawn up tight like a fist between my legs. I came on a roar, my arms wrapped around his helpless body, crushing him against me. The ache inside my balls tore free, sending hot jolts of pleasure through my veins. I dropped forward with his back against my sweaty front and rolled my hips, burying every inch inside him.
Dima gave a whimpered gasp as I pumped the condom full of come. What I would give to watch it trickle out of him… Never had I known such pleasure. Such frenzy. So raw and primal. I didn’t want to stop, energy still coursing through me, so I kept grinding into him. “My little kitten.”
THIRTY-ONE
Dima
I didn’t know what time it was. Only that it was very late and I was very tired. And sore. I needed to try and sleep because I absolutely had to go to work in the morning, or I would definitely be in trouble, but it was hard to let myself drift off.
Tony had ravaged me. More beast than man. Again and again. I felt bruises on my hips, my thighs, possibly even my throat. It was everything I wanted. Rough, bordering on violent. Enthusiastic.
And after, he’d taken my ears off, picked me up and set me on the bed. Cleaned me off. Tucked me in and then climbed in next to me, pulled me close and kissed my hair. A big old teddy bear now. Tony was dangerous. So fucking dangerous. He threatened my carefully curated reality, and it was terrifying. But I was powerless to stop it.
“Trouble sleeping?” Tony mumbled. His fingers traced random shapes on my back.
“Mm. Not trouble. Just thinking.” I curled closer to him, trailing my hand down his chest.
“‘Bout what?”
“You.”
Tony hummed at that. “What about me?”
Laughing, I cocked my head back to face him. “How you come across as such a laid-back guy, but really you’re a beast.”
“A beast?” Tony chuckled. His gentle touch was such a contrast to how he’d been before. I craved both of them. Both sides of Tony.
“Yes.” I grinned, hiking my leg higher over him. “I don’t know how I’m going to make it to work tomorrow.”
Tony reached down, palming my ass gingerly. “Sorry,” he said sheepishly. “I could always carry you.”
“Nope. Not going to happen.”
“But you’re so light,” he cooed in a cloying voice. “It would be easy.”
“It really isn’t happening.”
“Fine, fine. Next time I’ll be gentler.”
Uh, no.
Tony let out a sharp cry as I snapped my teeth down on his chest. His whole body jerked against mine. Then he let out a sighing moan. “I take that as a no from you?” he groaned, breathless.
“Mhm,” I purred, soothingly licking the spot I’d bitten. “Don’t want you to be any different than you already are. You’re perfect.”
His fingers laced in my hair, holding tight for a moment. Tugging, he pulled my head away from his chest and placed a kiss on my lips. Our tongues twisted together lazily, nails dragging to his stomach. If I hadn’t been so tired, I would have been ready to be on him again. As it was, my tired cock gave a little stir.
I broke the kiss after a moment, plopping my head back to his shoulder and closing my eyes again. My mind was willing. Very willing, but I honestly didn’t think my body could take it. For once, I didn’t want more sex. Tony had actually managed to wear me out. And so I wrapped my arm around him as if he was my own personal teddy bear.
“Do you work tomorrow?” I asked. I hoped not so he could spend all his time lavishing affection on me. Not that I would tell him.
“Yeah. Same shift,” Tony grumbled. He tensed noticeably. “And if that asshole is there and tries to say something about you, it’s probably going to be my last shift.”
I angled my face away from him so he couldn’t see my smile. I didn’t want him to get a big head, but the fact that he was so willing to defend me was actually touching. I couldn’t think of many boyfriends before him that would. “Don’t get yourself fired,” I murmured. “And if that asshole is there and says mean things, call me. I’ll come suck you off in the alley or something. Make him really jealous.”
Tony’s body relaxed at that, and I grinned as he squeezed me. “I’ll keep that in mind,” he said, a smile in his voice as he buried his face in my hair. “Can you do that, even if he’s not mean?”
“Anytime.” I paused for a moment, tongue rubbing over my lower lip as I debated my next words. “Are you going to come by after work again?”
“It’s going to be late,” he said softly. “I don’t want to keep you up when you have to work.”
“It’s fine. I don’t mind waiting up.” Not like I was desperate to be with him or anything.
“Dima…”
“I could leave the door unlocked, and then if I fall asleep, you can walk right in.”
“No!” Tony’s words were sharp. “That’s not safe. Anyone could walk in and…”
I wouldn’t know. I understood what he said, but it wasn’t like the area was dangerous. It would be fine. Especially if he was going to be there. “But—”
“No, Dima.”
“Well...I have a spare key.”
THIRTY-TWO
Tony
It’d been three and a half weeks since I’d arrived, and Dima and I had settled into a routine. It had been a sudden change from him pushing me away to giving me a key. But I didn’t complain. Actually, I couldn’t stop grinning like a fool. I went to the bar in the evening every other day and spent most of my afternoons with Sara and Leslie while Dima worked at the café. My new book had just released, and I spent a lot of time engaging and promoting the hell out of it on social media. I had brought my laptop over to Dima’s and a change of clothes as well. Sara let me use her washing machine whenever I came over because, well, it wasn’t like I had moved in or anything.
Nevertheless, it was nice. I didn’t feel the need to change location, to run off into the sunset for another adventure. I figured I could use a break from traveling, to sort my thoughts, to just be. I enjoyed bartending again despite the douchebag I had to work with every now and then. Tim and I barely spoke whenever we were on the same shift. Marcel, on the other hand, seemed quite keen on having me around.
She flirted relentlessly.
If I hadn’t noticed it before, it was pretty fucking obvious now. She laughed and batted her eyelashes at me, finding excuses to be close. Dima would scratch her eyes right out if he knew, I was sure of it. I never told him though. I played along, smiled, and politely let her know I wasn’t interested.
I had come back from picking up a few groceries when a notification popped up on my laptop. I’d been tagged on a post by my old university mates. I’d studied law in Seattle, however, for one year during my studies, I had gone to Berlin as an exchange student. Mostly because I’d been intent on partying and bedding hot Germans. Things hadn’t quite gone as planned, but I’d made some good friends. I grinned as I saw Eric’s name on the post. Eric and I had hit it off immediately, and once a year, we made it a point to catch up and call each other. He also loved sending me little drawings he did, some pretty, some ridiculous, to see if I’ll get them tattooed like the one I’d done on my chest. I hadn’t seen him in years, and I was eager to hear how he was doing.
So I messaged him. Being in the same time zone, he replied immediately and told me he’d call once he got out of a meeting with a client. I chopped up carrots, tomatoes, and zucchini while I waited for his call to come in, one headphone in my ear so I could keep cooking while we talked. As I turned on the pan to fry the vegetables, my phone rang, and I connected the call.
“Dude!” I laughed, so did he. “It’s been age
s.”
“I know. I know. How’ve you been? You’re in the Netherlands now?”
“Yeah, kinda got stuck here after my sister asked me to come over,” I said as I poured oil into the pan. I told him about what had happened to my brother and how my sister and I hadn’t even been invited to the funeral. It’d been brutal, really. Being excluded like that. Eric knew about what I’d gone through when I’d decided to quit law and travel. In fact, I had gone back to Berlin before going on my journey around the world. Eric and I had planned my finances for the trips I wanted to take, and he’d encouraged me to write down my adventures so I could sell them eventually. Which I did, thanks to him.
“So, what’s new with you?” I asked after I’d gone on and on about my current living situation. I had mentioned Dima briefly, but we usually didn’t talk much about relationships and the like. Mainly because we’d been sort of a thing back in Berlin. Nothing serious, but it still felt awkward to talk about other relationships around each other.
“Oh, yeah, remember I told you about Adrien? My half brother from the States?” I nodded, but of course, he couldn’t see that.
“Yeah,” I replied and stirred the vegetables in the pan before I reached for my glass of water. “What about him?”
Eric chuckled, a soft, breathy sound before he went on, “Well, he’s here now. In Berlin, living with me. He’s studying music at UDK. The University of the Arts”
“No shit!” I stopped sipping my water and set the glass back down. “That’s amazing. Jesus, man, he actually got accepted? That’s a huge deal!”
“I know!” Eric said, his voice pitching higher. I laughed, turning down the heat of the pan. I grabbed a can of tomatoes and opened it. “He’s just started, but he has great potential. I can send over a recording if you like.”
“What’s he playing?”
“Piano.”
“Awesome. Send it over.” God, Eric’s baby brother had always been a sore spot for him. Having been separated had eaten away at him until they got back in touch a couple of years ago. I still remembered the voice message he’d sent me when Adrien had reached out to talk to him. I’d never ever heard that much happiness in his voice before then. And he still sounded the same when talking about him.
“So you’re gonna stay in the Netherlands for a while?” Eric asked as I poured the chopped tomatoes into the pan, the sizzling noise so loud I barely heard his question.
“Yeah, yeah. I figured I have enough content to write my next book here. About traveling on a low budget, you know? Living the dream, sleeping in hostels, hitchhiking. How not to get robbed and left for dead in a ditch,” I joked. Eric laughed.
“I could have sworn you had another reason to stay.”
I smiled at his comment, setting up a pot of boiling water for the pasta. “Well, yeah, I met someone here. But it’s all really...new and exciting.”
“Nothing serious,” Eric finished for me.
“It’s serious,” I amended, heaved the pot onto the stove, and turned it on.
“Oh? That’s new. I thought Tony didn’t do serious anymore.”
I clucked my tongue and rolled my eyes, smiling. “Nah, hon, that’s just with you. You’re not boyfriend material.”
“Oh! I see how it is.”
“You love me,” I pointed out as I leaned my back against the wall next to the window. When I looked outside, there he was, Dima, walking down the dark street with his coat pulled up tight and his scarf around his neck, hat in place. He looked so adorable I wanted to pinch his cheeks and then give him a bruising kiss. “Speaking of boyfriends, I must leave you now.”
I heard Eric shuffle in the background, chuckling at my lazy-ass attempt to find a polite way to end the conversation. “Always leaving me. Tell your boyfriend I’m jealous.”
I grinned and shook my head. I certainly would not tell him that.
“You wish. Alright, send me that demo.”
“I will. Talk soon?”
“Talk soon,” I answered and ended the call.
Dima unlocked the door right when the water in the pot started to boil. I added the dry pasta and glanced at him from where I stood. He took off his boots and neatly set them aside. He had a place for everything, and after the coffee table incident, I understood why. All clean shaven with a soft cold-air blush across his cheeks, Dima shucked off his scarf, hat, and coat, and then padded over to me.
“Hey, baby,” I said and pecked the top of his head. I loved our size difference. Dima was the little spoon in bed, snuggling into me and curling up like a cat. I loved to hold him at night, to comfort him like that. But I also couldn’t deny I was crazy about picking him up and moving him around. Because, holy hell, he was light as a feather.
“Mh, hey,” Dima mumbled and kissed my chest right below my sternum, his arms sliding around me. I added a pinch of salt to the water as he velcroed onto my side.
“How was your day?” I looked down at him and brushed the back of my fingers across his smooth cheek. “Zoe did a fine job,” I told him. Every time Dima wanted to shave, I had offered to do it for him, but he refused to let me help. He hadn’t said it, but I knew it was because he didn’t want to feel like he relied on me. So Zoe had helped him shave. From what I understood, she didn’t do it for him; she merely guided his hands. I understood where he was coming from though. He wanted to feel empowered. The same reason he had decided to stay in this town and memorized every street and how many steps it took him to get to work and back. It was impressive, really.
“Yes, didn’t cut myself this time.” Dima sighed loudly, turning his head away from me. “Now I have nothing for you to kiss better,” he mumbled against my chest.
I grinned brightly, and while I kept one eye on the simmering pot and pan, I hooked my hands under his armpits and lifted him up. Dima gasped and yelped in surprise. I loved that sound—that’s why I did it after all. As I said, light as a feather. I pressed my lips to his, slow and deep, his hands gripping my shirt at its collar.
“I’m sure I’ll find plenty of reasons to kiss something better,” I whispered against his parted lips, my arms flexing at his slight weight. Dima tugged at my clothes before his hands went to my beard; he held my jaw, resting his forehead on mine.
“You make my day, Tony.”
“And you make mine.”
Dima
Tony made dinner, and—as always—we ate together at the coffee table. He’d brought his laptop over, and while we made casual conversation about our day, a movie played in the background. He usually picked something I had seen before so it was easier for me to follow along. Between bites, Tony pressed kisses to my hair, stroked my side, and I kept my fingers on his thigh, tangled in his pants, and holding on tight. It was as if we were a proper couple. Fuck. We were a proper couple. It had all happened so fast.
He did the dishes when we were done eating, and I dried them, putting them back in their precise places. He was good at putting things where I wanted them, but there was still some stuff I couldn’t give up control of. Despite my trust in him, a part of me always worried he was going to leave. If things were misplaced and he left, I’d never find them again.
Dishes done, we settled on the couch with cookies and milk. I sat sideways on Tony’s lap, back against the armrest and leaning against his chest. Tony loved feeding me. I didn’t understand it, and I was probably going to get fat if he kept it up, but it wasn’t something I wanted to stop. I liked cookies and Tony so...it was a win-win.
“I know we’ve talked about this before, but...are you really not considering to model ever again? It isn’t impossible.” Tony asked suddenly, pressing a milk-soaked cookie to my lips.
I took a big bite and shrugged as I chewed. “Mm, in my dreams,” I murmured after swallowing. “I liked it. I really did. Having people make me look pretty, wearing crazy clothing or nothing at all, posing. The attention. Getting to twist myself into what they wanted. It was satisfying.”
Truth was, I’d loved it. The firs
t one I did with my ex was at the beach, perched on a massive rock near the ocean. Draped in fabric, soaked through. It was cold. I spent the time between pictures shaking so hard I thought I’d crack apart, and I nearly got swept out to sea by a large wave near the end. But I’d loved it. The pictures looked amazing, and they made me feel good about myself. I had put up some of them in my living room before losing my sight, and I’d left them there. Sometimes I could go to each one, touching the frame and trying my hardest to remember every detail of it.
“You don’t need to be made up to look pretty,” Tony said. He dunked another cookie in the bowl of milk I held. “And you could still do it, you know?”
“More hassle than it’s worth. I told you.” I sighed, taking the next cookie he offered me. I didn’t like discussing what I could have when I knew it would never be. Made me sad. I wanted to eat my cookies and drink my milk and cuddle my...Tony. That was it.
Tony didn’t drop the topic though. I could practically hear his thoughts grinding together in his head. Instead, he kissed my forehead and tapped my lips with his fingers. “Want some more?” he asked.
“Uh-uh.” I shook my head, taking his finger into my mouth and sucking the chocolate crumbs off. My stomach was almost painfully full, and now all I wanted to do was finish off my milk and sleep. Afterward, I licked Tony’s fingers clean. I finished with his thumb, and he hooked it against my teeth, forcing my head back. I felt his eyes scan over my face, wondering what he thought about. He finally let me go, and I smiled faintly.
“Drink your milk, kitten, so we can go to bed.”
Biting back a giggle, I gave him a quiet meow and lifted the bowl to my face. He rubbed my back while I drank, and when I was finished, he pressed a kiss to my nose. “Meow.”
THIRTY-THREE
Dima