Now she was out there somewhere, in the world, undoubtedly alone and friendless, with none to protect her, when he should be at her side.
He was a fool, and a fool in love, and for a love that was unlikely to ever be requited.
A heavy sigh escaped him, and it was echoed by the groan of a leather chair as someone sat beside him – a gentleman who looked awfully familiar.
He was tall, dark, and had a stately bearing. Nothing unusual in this gentleman’s club, of course, but there was something beyond that. Something in the eyes – no, the smile.
James blinked at the gentleman, and could not put his finger on how he knew him.
“Excuse me,” he said, leaning over, unable to help himself, “but have we met before?”
The look of surprise and lack of recognition in the gentleman’s face answered clearly enough, but he cleared his throat nonetheless and said, “I am sorry, I do not think we have – but let me introduce myself. I am George Northmere.”
The name was unfamiliar, and James sat back in his chair in disappointment, shaking his head. “No, you are correct, we have not met. My apologies.”
“None required,” smiled the man jovially, despite the tuts that they were now receiving from other gentlemen in the room. “‘Tis a common occurrence for me, so I am quite accustomed to it. Most people mistake me for my older brother, the Marquis of Dewsbury.”
James jumped, startled, at this information: but of course! Rising from his chair and moving into the one beside it, to be closer to Mr Northmere, he smiled.
“You have got it exactly – ‘tis your brother’s likeness that I see in you, to be sure!”
The two men shook hands, though James could see that Mr Northmere was more than a little irritated that it was once again not himself that was of interest, but his sibling.
But James could not stop now: not when he had such a providential opportunity to ask what he had been desperately hoping to enquire about for so long.
“And how,” he said with quiet trepidation, “is your brother?”
“Oh, you must not alarm yourself,” said Mr Northmere hastily. “He is quite well, and we do believe that he will recover completely with no long term ills.”
James stared at him, confused, as another gentleman in the room tried to hush them. “Recover?”
Mr Northmere nodded, and smiled his thanks at the serving man who had just brought him a large glass of brandy. “Yes, recover, from the duel. We were alarmed at first, but ‘twas just a graze really.”
Trying to keep his voice calm and his face steady, James enquired nonchalantly, “And the cause of the duel: had it ever come out?”
The Marquis’ brother evidently assumed that James was more intimate with his dealings than he actually was, for he leaned forward conspiratorially and whispered, “Well, of course, it was over a woman!”
James swallowed. “A woman?”
Mr Northmere took a large mouthful of the brandy before he answered. “Not his wife, you understand – she is quite innocent and unconnected with all events, save the fact that the woman in question was a friend of hers. She is with them now of course, and will undoubtedly stay there until her confinement.”
“Con-confinement?” James stared at him, the words trying to sink in but not quite managing it. Confinement? What could he mean?
“Ye gods man, have you not heard?” For all that Mr Northmere was a gentleman, thought James, he seemed to be having far too much enjoyment passing on this piece of tasty gossip. “I thought everyone knew: the woman, the one whose honour my brother protected, is with child. A failed elopement, you know, and no one knows who, but the pregnancy itself is common knowledge.”
At the word ‘pregnancy’ James started up, knocking over the table holding George’s drink which smashed on the carpet, throwing glass and brandy everywhere.
“Are you sure?” James cried out, ignoring the horrified looks and shouts of those around him. “You are sure, man, that the woman is with child?”
Mr Northmere, startled out of wits and staring at James as though he were a man possessed, nodded frantically. “All know it, sir, though none know the identity of the woman herself, nor the man who has so shamelessly abandoned her! She is adamant, my brother tells me, that she will not lay claim on the man’s honour, and will bear the child alone!”
James was breathing heavily, as though he had just run a thousand miles in a minute. There was absolutely no chance that it could be anyone else: it had to be Rowena. His Rowena. His child.
A smile, broad and light-hearted, spread across his face. “Thank you, Mr Northmere,” he said, stepping across the broken glass and brandy soaked carpet to wring the bewildered man’s hand. “Thank you with all my heart.”
And without another word, he rushed out of the club to find his child, and his beloved who carried it.
10
The smile that Rowena managed was wan at best, but her friend was good enough to pretend that she was convinced.
“There now,” said Adena with a concerned expression. “‘Tis good to see you smile.”
Rowena nodded, her smile unwilling – or unable – to broaden, and as she was jolted by the coach moving over a stone, her gaze shifted to the window revealing the ever moving landscape, house after house, building after building rushing past.
Perhaps it was that which made her feel even more nauseous – or perhaps it was the child growing within her. How could she have not guessed that she was with child? The pregnancy signs were all there: tiredness, lethargy, sickness in the morning and nausea throughout the rest of the day. She had even grown to dislike tea.
She shook her head slightly as Adena chattered with Luke, the two of them seated on the other side of the carriage. It had been her friend who had noticed first rather than herself, and she had had enough of a conversation with her mother when her fluxes had first arrived to understand their meaning.
But this situation was absurd: with child, her? Who would have thought that you really could make love just the once – one heady night – and fall with child immediately?
“Do not concern yourself,” Luke was saying to his wife, a comforting hand on hers. “We shall arrive at the doctor’s quite soon.”
“I still do not understand why the doctor cannot come to us,” said Adena petulantly, her other hand on her stomach.
Rowena watched Luke’s gaze look over at her for a moment, and then fall back to his wife. “Because…because it is easier this way, that is all.”
Rowena watched the flicker of concern mingled with excitement on Adena’s face, and the guilty feeling that she had been experiencing ever since the Marquis and Marchioness of Dewsbury had taken her in after her disgrace increased once more. Of course the doctor could not come to visit them – there would be talk, and talk would lead to visits, and visits would mean the truth would come out.
They had sacrificed much – Luke especially – to harbour such a fallen woman. Their social engagements curtailed, the constant threat of discovery hanging over their heads. As the carriage picked up pace as it travelled outside of London, Rowena sighed and tried not to think about the journey they were on.
“I must apologise for the discomfort of the journey,” Adena murmured to her with a smile. “No doctor in London could be trusted to keep their tongues quiet, and we would have used our own carriage to transport us there, but this one is not recognisable.”
Rowena nodded, and felt the sense of shame increase in her once more. All this trouble, all of this expense, for her. She should never have gone with them, that day at the King’s Head Inn. She should have found her own way home.
But was not that attitude exactly what had got her into this trouble in the first place?
Her eyes watched as the houses thinned, and countryside appeared as they left London. To breathe clean air against hat was at least one simple comfort that she could draw from their overly cautious trip.
“Is the doctor expecting us?” She asked Adena.
/> Luke nodded, a broad smile creeping over his face. This seemed to be such a strange response to her predicament that Rowena glanced at her friend, to see if she had noticed the strange reaction – but Adena blushed as her friend’s gaze came upon her.
Rowena laughed, and it was a true laugh, the first for many days. “Adena, you sly thing! Clearly I am not the only one who is visiting the doctor today to discuss their child!”
Adena’s face flushed an even darker pink, and Rowena was able for a few moments to forget that they were seated in an uncomfortable, dank carriage with little to no comfort, forced out of London to visit a doctor whose silence could be trusted.
“No wonder,” grinned Rowena, “no wonder you were so quick to easily identify my situation!”
“Well, it was obvious anyway,” Adena countered, her hands tightening around her husband’s. “But…yes, ‘tis true. We are also expecting!”
The two friends laughed together, and Rowena felt some of the tension in her shoulders melt away. Well, if she could not share this with – no, she would not think of him, she would not allow him to even enter her mind – then the least she could do was share it with someone who she knew cared about her, and knew what she was experiencing.
“Tell me all,” Rowena said, a little more fiercely than she had intended in order to drown out the thoughts of him from her mind. “When did you know?”
Adena exchanged a glance with her husband, and they both grinned. “Well,” she said coyly, “you may be surprised to learn that we were not…strong enough, shall we say, to wait until we were married before we…”
Rowena’s jaw dropped, and she stared at Luke who had the good breeding to look a little embarrassed. “My lord Marquis, you do surprise me!”
“I have no idea what you are referring to,” replied Luke good-naturedly, above his wife’s giggles. “You know Adena, she talks such nonsense.”
The three of them laughed together, and Rowena leaned back to listen to her friend’s chatter; about their love, about how they met on the island, about their baby…
As interesting as Adena’s words were, Rowena could not help but glance more often than was strictly necessary at her husband. Luke was watching his wife with such a look of pride and devotion that it almost made Rowena blush, as though she had disturbed one of their most intimate moments.
To think that James may have looked at her in such a way, if he knew that he had a child coming into the world. A son? A daughter? Would they have his pale blue eyes, or his way with words? Rowena placed a hand surreptitiously across her stomach. Could it feel her love, even now when it was so small? Did it know how much it was wanted?
All three of them gave a shout as the coach jerked suddenly to one side, and Rowena shrieked and brought a hand to her head as she was thrown against the side of the carriage. Head spinning and stars appearing in her vision, she saw a blur of something that looked like a man on horseback through the window of the carriage.
Mind dazed and head sore, Rowena blinked. She could not have seen that. She could not have – but her eyes focused and found the window once more, and was dismayed to see the same image. A highwayman, riding at full pelt just to the left of the coach, galloping to keep up and despite the hurried yells of their driver, managing it.
“A-a man,” was all she managed as her temple throbbed. Luke stared in the direction where she was pointing, and cursed quietly under his breath.
“Faster man!” He yelled, hitting the roof of the coach. “Faster!”
Rowena’s heart was racing. It was rare, these days, for a coach to be taken by highwaymen – but not unheard of. As the coach jerked forward at full tilt, bumping the three inhabitants around like matches in a box, the two women looked at each other.
Adena looked anxious, and Rowena saw with a lump in her throat that both of them were naturally clutching their bellies, as though they could in some way protect their unborn babes with the action.
“Luke – Luke, what is happening,” Adena breathed, her face unbearably pale. “He must not hurt you, you must not do anything…anything…”
Her eyelashes fluttered, and her head slumped slightly as she fainted.
“Adena! Adena!” Rowena leaned forward, one hand still clutching her own stomach, and felt the pulse of her friend. “It is low, but it is there.”
Luke nodded with relief, but he could not concern himself totally with his wife: his eyes still watched the highwayman, and so did Rowena.
Newspaper reports raced through her mind. Highwaymen were known to rob, rape, murder those who they accost. What did this man want? What was going to happen to her – to them, to her baby?
The coach moved faster and faster until the world was a complete blur, but yet still that dark blur was following them, keeping abreast of the carriage, forcing the coach driver to whip the horses again and again, until they cut go no further –
And then a huge jerk and both Adena and Rowena were thrust against the side of the carriage as the blur that was the highwayman forced his horse across their path, cutting off the horses and causing them to slow down.
Heart in her mouth, barely able to comprehend exactly what was happening, Rowena cast her panicked gaze at Luke.
“Stay here – stay inside,” he said forcefully. “Do you hear me, Rowena? No matter what happens, stay inside the coach.”
It had come to a stop now, but Rowena was still shaking. This was a nightmare, this could not be happening. She did not understand how a simple Tuesday afternoon could end this way.
There were steps outside now, and Luke gave her a warning look but there was a rising sense of injustice within her. No one, but no one was going to hurt them.
She would not allow it.
As the man flung open the carriage door, Rowena raised both feet and kicked him hard in the chest.
She was not a particularly strong woman, and if she had had more time, she may have thought of a more impressive move – but it was enough.
The man choked, all the breath knocked out of him, and recoiled completely winded away from the coach.
“And there is more of that,” shouted Rowena, trying to keep her voice level but strong. “You can take anything you want of value – ”
“Rowena,” breathed Luke, but she ignored him.
“ – but you will not harm myself, my baby, or any of us in here!” Rowena ended, her hands balled into fists. She would kill before she allowed anyone to hurt her, or the life growing within her.
Breathing heavily, head spinning, stomach sore and mind confused, he tried desperately to recall exactly what he was going to say.
The well-prepared speech seemed to vanish from his tongue, and his lips moved soundlessly, wordlessly, as he staggered beside the coach, trying to keep his balance.
“And stay back!”
The voice was angry, fierce, almost a little violent, but it caused a leap of joy in his stomach not unconnected to the pain in his ribs. It was her.
James, Viscount of Paendly, choked. “You know, it does my heart good to see just how violently you will protect yourself and our child, Rowena.”
There was a gasp from the coach as a beautiful face emerged from the coach, and saw that the man she was terrified of attacking them was actually him – the man whom she had left at the King’s Head Inn over a month ago.
“Rowena Kerr, I love you,” James said simply.
“You – you are no highwayman!” She managed to splutter.
James laughed, and shook his head. “Just a man wearing a black cloak – ‘tis surprising how similar the outline is. Oh, Rowena, at every turn, I am impressed by you. To think that you would kick a stranger – and it was a painful kick, I can assure you – to protect our child – ”
“I would never need to,” cut in Rowena bitterly, stepping out of the coach and glaring at him, “if you had wanted anything to do with me.”
Her words cut into James like a knife, but he embraced the pain as he embraced the shooting stabbing pains i
n his ribs: because he deserved them. He deserved this, because he had not recognised her worth from the very beginning.
“I cannot apologise enough,” he said quietly. “I was a fool, and could not see you for what you were – the precious jewel that was just in my reach, and I did not grasp you when I could. And I no longer care who knows that I am ridiculously in love with you, Ro.”
Was that a flinch that he saw across her beautiful face as he shortened her name?
“I am sorry,” James smiled a little self-consciously. “It is what I call you in my dreams, when I cry out for you in the darkness, when I felt across the bed for the woman I knew would not be there, but I felt should be.”
She was not saying anything. Was that a good sign? Her gown was fluttering in the breeze now, but she did not shiver in the cold. Her eyes did not move from his.
James tried taking a step forward, towards her. “Allowing you to escape me at the King’s Head Inn was the biggest mistake of my life.”
“The biggest mistake of your life was finding me at the Wingston Inn,” Rowena spat back, but there was no vehemence in her words, just pain, hurt.
He was standing before her now, and he reached out a hand to touch her arm. She moved away, but not far enough to escape his reach.
“Now I am telling you this in no uncertain terms,” he said in a low voice, feeling the tingle of her skin under his fingertips. “It was the best thing that has ever happened to me, and I will be grateful for that impulse for the rest of my life.”
Was that a flicker of a smile? A smile for him?
“Do you really believe that?”
James brought his free hand to Rowena’s cheek, and he could not be imagining that she was leaning into it, could he? “I believe that it was fate that brought us together, and fate again which has allowed me to find you. Because I love you, Ro.”
There was no flinch at the repeat of his name for her, and the flicker of a smile seemed to appear again.
Ravishing Regencies- The Complete Series Page 43