“Would you mind? I just don’t think I can deal with the crowd right now,” she said quietly, looking at her feet.
“No, go ahead. Take the car and I’ll be there as soon as I can.” The witch tried to send reassuring thoughts to her wife.
“I’m sorry, I want to be here for you, but I just need to get away. I also want to make sure everything is okay at the house,” she explained, leaning forward to rest her forehead on Raelin’s chest.
“Go ahead, but take this with you,” she stepped away from the blonde to kneel down in front of her safe, opened it, and took out her journal and another older manuscript. “I feel better with them at the house.”
“Okay, I’ll lock them in my lockbox until you get back,” the blonde said, gently taking the objects. “Stay close to Kasey please. I don’t want to risk anything happening to you.”
After saying goodbye to her wife, Del nodded to Kasey and the various workers milling about and stepped out of the store. She started making her way towards the car, pushing her way through the crowd still milling about, ignoring requests for information from anyone who asked. She got into the car, so many emotions running through her, she couldn’t tell what was what and quickly made her way to the house trying to figure out what she was supposed to do now.
Seeing Delaney step out of the office and leave the store, Kasey knocked on the office door and poked her head in. “Everything okay?”
Raelin sat on the edge of her desk and sighed. “This evening started out so well, but it has certainly gone to hell in a hand basket. I don’t even know how to answer that question.”
“Is there anything I can do? Besides finding whoever is responsible for this and throwing the book at them. Del looked so unlike herself,” Kasey asked quietly, concerned for both of her friends. “While you and Del were in here, I got a call from Jacobs about Del being suspended. Plus the damage done here at the Nook. There’s no way any of this is an accident. What’s going on?”
“I just don’t know Kase… Do you think that it’s someone that was missed in the trafficking fiasco? Someone that wants to get back at us? Delaney said that her record had been expunged, so there shouldn’t have been a way for someone to find out about it.” The witch ran her hands over her face.
Leaning on the desk next to the witch, she wrapped a comforting arm around her friend’s shoulders. “It’s possible, although it’s hard to say for sure. You’ve both angered a few people recently and right now we can’t even tell if it’s you or Delaney they are going after. Jacobs is already trying to do everything she can to find the leak on those records. I promise you, I’m going to do everything I can to get them, Raelin.”
“If whoever this is comes after Delaney, I want you to do whatever you have to keep her safe. And if Ariel is still here, you protect her. I’ll do what I can to protect them also, but…” Raelin shook her head. “I have a really bad feeling about this, Kasey.”
“I know, I do too. I’ll do whatever I can to protect all of you. Or as much as Delaney will let me, stubborn as she is. We should probably get you home now. There isn’t anything else we can do tonight, Douglas has already boarded up the window and volunteered to keep watch to make sure whoever it was doesn’t try to finish the job.”
At Raelin’s silent nod, Kasey led them out of the Nook and towards her truck, motioning for Raelin to jump inside. She told Douglas that she would send Michaels in once she got to the house and instructed him to call her if anything happened. Once she was in the driver’s seat, she navigated through the now dispersing crowd and made her way towards the Delacroix place.
It was a silent drive, both women’s thoughts wandering while Kasey drove but soon enough she was pulling into the driveway parking beside Michael’s cruiser. Hopping out she followed Raelin to the porch where Michaels was sitting. “You can head back in town now. Thank you for watching over them. Douglas will be waiting for you at the Nook. We appreciate you volunteering like you did.”
“It’s no problem ma’am. Everyone just wants to make sure you guys are safe. This is getting way out of hand and we’re going to find who did this,” he said with a nod, giving Raelin’s shoulder a comforting squeeze as he passed on his way to his car.
Raelin thanked the man, but didn’t head inside. She could feel the despair rolling off her wife. She took a step back at the thoughts she was getting, and would have fallen if Kasey hadn’t caught her.
“Are you okay?” Kasey asked, keeping a steadying hold on the witch.
“Kasey… she’s so depressed...she’s feeling that this is all her fault. That she didn’t catch everyone or figure things out fast enough.” Raelin held on to the porch railing.
“She a proud woman Raelin, a proud woman who lived for her work, this is bound to be hard on her. She’s always been hard on herself and I can only imagine how badly she’s beating herself up. Right now, more than anything, she needs her wife. Not only that, but she needs her best friend. She needs you Raelin, you’re the only one she’ll listen to like this,” Kasey said softly, knowing that Delaney wasn’t the only one hurting. “More than that, I know you need her too. She wasn’t the only one wronged tonight.”
Raelin squeezed Kasey’s hand. “Thank you for being such a good friend.” Taking a deep breath, she took the few steps forward to walk inside.
Del knew her wife and friend were home she had felt Raelin the minute she’d stepped onto the porch. Despite that, she made no move to get up from her place at the kitchen table. She’d talked to Kai and Jenny just long enough to make sure Ariel was safe before she’d changed into a ratty Tulane University t-shirt and sat down at the kitchen table with a glass of whiskey. The open bottle sat in front of her as she stared at the badge in one hand and the glass in the other. She was hardly drunk far from it, but the lack of food in her stomach meant she was feeling things a lot faster than she normally would have. She wasn’t sure what she was supposed to feel. Raelin knew her dirty secret now and had to hear it from a hotel worker of all things. She didn’t have her job to bury herself in and she’d been unable to get answers fast enough to prevent Raelin’s store from being damaged.
She heard the front door open and knew that Raelin and Kasey had both stepped inside and heard the murmured conversation as they stepped into the living room. She knew Raelin would come looking for her, but she couldn’t get up the energy to move and simply took another sip of the golden liquid in her glass, welcoming the burn as it slid down her throat and sat heavily in her stomach, her gaze never wavering from her badge.
“That badge is not who you are. You know that you are more than your job. You’re my wife and my very best friend.” Raelin stood in the doorway.
Still not looking up, Del took another sip. “People were relying on me, you were relying on me, and now I’ve let you all down. What am I supposed to tell them all tomorrow? The Mayor is having a press conference and I’ll need to stand up there and tell everyone that it’s true. That I did run drugs as a kid.”
“What would have happened if you hadn’t? You would have starved to death or ended up in child services away from your father. I know that he wasn’t the best parent in the world, but you deserved to be able to stay with him. That is a small portion of your life Delaney…that does not make you a bad person.” Raelin wanted to go over to her wife, but she couldn’t tell if Delaney wanted her to.
Del mulled those words over for a minute, staring hard at the liquid in her hand. Eventually she let her head fall forward and pushed the glass away, the badge she held she set gently back to the table. “I’m so sorry you had to find out from a stranger.”
“That is neither here nor there Delaney. It is the past and it is something that cannot be changed. You are not that person anymore,” Raelin simply stated.
“I know,” was the quiet reply. Shaking her head to try to clear it somewhat, she finally looked up at Raelin. “How are you making out? You okay?”
“I’m fine...Kasey is in the living room, and I’m sure that
she would love to go over some things with you. I want to go upstairs to change clothes and check on Ariel.” The brunette still didn’t move. “I love you Delaney.”
Those words seemed to shift something in Del and she reached out to her wife. “Those words are about the only thing that’s made sense all night. I love you too Darlin’, so very much.”
In a few steps, Raelin had her arms around the blonde and holding her close with Delaney’s head against her stomach. Leaning down, she pressed a gentle kiss a top golden hair. “It will be all right Darlin’.”
“I know. We’ll figure it out, or at least, I’ll do the best I can without being able to actually do anything.” Del sighed into the warmth of Raelin’s body. She squeezed her a little tighter than she normally would have, letting the presence of her wife the strength and the love she felt from her start to set her world right side up once more.
“Okay, you go change and check on Ariel, hopefully, she’ll sleep the whole night through. I’ll go talk to Kasey for a bit. Are they staying here for the night or heading back to town?” she asked into Raelin’s tummy.
“I don’t think so. Kai needs to be back at the Foundation before midnight.” The witch pressed her love through their link as she thought; “Besides I don’t want anyone to hear us tonight. I want to touch you.”
Del felt the love, heard the words and took a deep calming breath as she rose, never letting go of Raelin. “Thank you for being so understanding and for not judging me.”
“Neither I nor anyone else has the right to judge you Delaney...not now, not ever.” Raelin stared down at her wife. “You did what you had to do at the time, and I’ll be damned if anyone else has the right to judge you either.”
“So fierce.” Del smiled at the conviction with which Raelin had said the words. She reached up and traced Raelin’s face with her fingertips, eventually resting them on her wife’s lips. “Just make sure you hide the bodies of all the reporters who are going to string me up tomorrow at the press conference.”
“They will be fair, for if they are not, I shall have Jessie sue every one of them in court for slander. I still can’t believe that the Picayune is running the story without contacting either one of us for a comment.” Raelin kissed her fingers.
Del shook her head. “The calls started coming after I left to come to the house. I had to turn my phone off. Not like anyone’s going to call me for work at this point anyway. I called Jessie when I got home real quick and she said that I just need to be honest. Everything that happened was true and I have no way to deny it.”
“How is her trial going?” Raelin continued to rub the blonde’s back reassuring her as much as possible.
“I’m fairly certain she hasn’t left her office and if I know Jessie she’s probably about ready to throttle the defense. I didn’t ask her because I could tell by her tone that she was about ready to kill someone.” Del actually let loose a small grin, as she pressed closer to her wife, her nose buried into her neck.
Holding her wife close, Raelin smiled. “Sounds like someone else I know.”
“Nothing wrong with being driven,” Del huffed playfully leaning back to look up into Raelin’s eyes.
“Okay...let me go change.” Raelin leaned down to brush her lips against the blondes.
Del tried to keep the kiss gentle but as soon as she felt Raelin’s lips against her own, she couldn’t help but immerse herself in the familiar sensations and emotions their kisses always stirred in her. She wrapped her arms around Raelin’s neck to hold her in place as she took what she needed to both reassure herself and calm her anxiety.
Raelin completely opened herself up and let the blonde take what she needed. She understood that Delaney had lost a part of herself and that was going to take time to get it back.
Only breaking away to take in a shaky breath, Del looked up at Raelin with watery eyes. “I love you. I’m not sure I could do all of this without you beside me,” she said quietly, but firmly.
“There is nowhere else I would rather be. I am yours Delaney Delacroix.” Raelin sent a mental picture of them sitting on the back porch when they were old and grey, holding hands.
Del smiled up at Raelin. “I would love to be old and grey with you. Now go change. I think we could both use some quiet time together.”
With a parting quick kiss the witch went upstairs to put on some comfortable clothes and to check on Ariel. As she put the shirt-dress into the dirty clothes she sighed. They had such high hopes for a romantic evening but that had all come crashing down around them. Smiling to herself she now understood the term ‘blue balls’ because she wanted nothing more than to spend some quiet loving time with her wife.
Tugging on a pair of sweat pants and a tank top Raelin pulled back her hair as she quietly made her way over to Ariel’s room to peek in. Seeing the smaller blonde asleep the witch muttered a few words to ensure that the child was in a deep sleep before she headed downstairs.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Del took a moment to center herself running her fingers through her hair and taking a deep breath before she headed into the living room to face the questions she knew her Deputy would have. She paused at the doorway, seeing Jenny curled comfortably at Kasey’s side with Kai stretched out next to them. “Jenny, Kai, I’m sorry if I worried you when I came home,” she said quietly. She had hardly said a thing to them when she arrived only asking after Ariel before checking on the small girl and planting herself at the kitchen table.
Jenny got up to walk over and give the blonde a hug. “No reason for you to apologize. With everything that is going on, you had every reason to try and get your thoughts in order.”
Returning the hug in kind, Del let the presence of her friends sooth her. “I assume Kasey already told you about her promotion then?” She said with a sad smile.
Quickly glancing at her fiancée, Jenny huffed, “It’s only temporary, so don’t worry about it. I know that everything will be sorted out quickly.”
Standing Kasey came over to place an arm across Delaney’s shoulders. “Yeah Boss, I have no desire to be the Lone Ranger...I’m quite happy being Tonto. I do, however, need to know the whole story.”
Jenny realized that this was official and took Kai and herself into the kitchen.
“There isn’t much to say really. When I was fourteen, I started running drugs for the local dealers. I never used any, just delivered them. You know about my father and well, when Fi died he got worse. So in order to feed us and keep the rent up, I had to do something,” Del explained as they moved to the couch.
“Were you arrested for drugs?” Kasey wasn’t going to beat around the bush.
Letting out a deep breath, Del nodded. “Yes, I was caught when a dealer I’d been running for got turned by the cops. I only had a tiny bit of pot on me when they picked me up. I was a good student and my teachers liked me so they came to the courtroom and stood up for me promised to keep me out of trouble. I got off with community service and a fine that a teacher was nice enough to cover and I paid him back later. I kept up the volunteer work because I liked it and maintained my grades so my teachers helped me get the record expunged before I left for college.”
Kasey stood up to walk across the room, running her hands through her hair. “So you ran drugs for three years? Didn’t it occur to you to try to get a real part time job? Hell, I had one from junior high on. You could have done the same thing, but instead you helped drugs get into the schools.”
“Kase no offense, but you had two parents and a white picket fence. You didn’t have to try to keep a roof over your head. A part time job wouldn’t have kept me fed, let alone housed. I didn’t run anything into schools if I could help it. I’m not trying to justify what I did; I’m just telling you that at the time I didn’t see any other way to make the kind of money I needed. I was a kid, and pretty much alone,” Del said standing from her place on the couch to face her Deputy.
“And I had a parent who was killed because people like your boss want
ed more territory. I’m not going to feel sorry for you Delaney. What you did was wrong, but I do believe that you did what you did because you couldn’t see any other way. I think that you were wrong to think that but it’s not anything I can change now.” Kasey stood with her hands on her hips, staring at her friend.
“I don’t want your pity and I know what I did was wrong. I’m not asking you to agree with what I did or even like it,” Del spat back. She was already on edge and the last thing she needed right now was a lecture on morality from her Deputy. “Jesus Kase. I know what happened to your father and it was terrible, but I’m already catching enough shit from everyone else, I don’t need it from you too.”
“You should have thought of that before you started carting that shit around,” Kasey shot back.
Raelin came into the room to catch the end of that statement and quickly projected as much calm into the space as possible as Jenny came in from the kitchen after hearing the raised voices.
Standing between the two women, Raelin placed a hand on each of their arms, attempting to calm them. Turning to Kasey, the witch dropped her voice, “Don’t you dare start judging her. You have no idea what she had to go through to survive, just like she doesn’t know what you went through in your family.” Speaking a bit louder, she said for Delaney to hear, “It’s the past guys. We can’t start passing judgment on each other. I’m sure that there is something in each of our past that we’re not proud of, and we don’t want it brought out for everyone to see.”
“Yeah, Kase, how would you feel if everyone found out why you left the FBI?” Del growled around Raelin.
“ENOUGH!” Raelin all but shouted. “I have had it with the innuendos and the guilt for what I did.” Turning to her wife she opened her mind to that day and let Delaney feel the helplessness that she felt standing in the hallway listening to Mrs. Kingsley rant, and then knowing when the woman was reaching for a gun to shoot her wife. Knowing that she could save Delaney Raelin had made the choice to run in and knock her down.
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