X.
THE NEW BURLESQUE.
With the year 1885 there dawned a new epoch for stage travestie inEngland. The old Gaiety company had broken up, Miss Farren aloneremaining; and with the accession of fresh blood there came freshmethods. The manager who had succeeded Mr. Hollingshead recognised thetendencies of the times; and with "Little Jack Sheppard"--a travestieby Messrs. Stephens and Yardley of the well-known story, familiar bothin fiction and in drama--a novel departure was made.
In the "palmy" days, burlesque had not, as a rule, formed the whole ofan evening's entertainment. The one-act travestie had grown on occasioninto two and even three acts; but, until recent years, the one act (inseveral scenes) had usually been deemed sufficient, the remainder ofthe programme being devoted to comedy or drama. The musical part of theperformance had generally been made up of adaptations or reproductionsof popular airs of the day--either comic songs or operatic melodies:very rarely had the music been special and original. The scenery hadnever been particularly remarkable; nor, save during the various_regimes_ of Vestris, had there been any special splendour in thedresses. For the most part, the old school of burlesque did not relyupon a brilliant _mise-en-scene_. In the prologue to his "Alcestis,"produced just forty-one years ago, we find Talfourd expressly drawingattention to the simplicity of the stage show. Speaking of theproductions at the houses of serious drama, he said:--
Plays of the greatest and the least pretence Are mounted so regardless of expense That fifty nights is scarce a run accounted-- Run! They should gallop, being so well _mounted_
But with "Alcestis" it was to be different:--
What you enjoy must be all "on the quiet." No horse will pull _our_ play up if it drag, No banners when our wit is on the flag; No great effects or new-imported dance The drooping eye will waken and entrance; ... But an old story from a classic clime, Done for the period into modern rhyme.
A very different policy was to characterise the New Burlesque. Thepieces, having now become the staple of the night's amusement, were tobe placed upon the boards with all possible splendour. Money was tobe spent lavishly on scenery, properties and costumes. Dancing was tobe a prominent feature--not the good old-fashioned "breakdowns" andthe like, but choreographic interludes of real grace and ingenuity.The music was to be written specially for the productions, and painswere to be taken to secure artists who could really sing. Somethinghad already been done in each of these directions. So long ago as1865 Mr. Burnand's "Windsor Forest" had been fitted with wholly newmusic; and at the Gaiety, under Mr. Hollingshead, burlesque had grownin elaborateness year by year. Not, however, till the production of"Little Jack Sheppard," in 1885, had the elaboration been so marked andcomplete in all departments.
Meanwhile, how were the librettists to be affected? Clearly, theywould have to give more opportunities than usual for musical andsaltatory illustration; and accordingly we find the book of "LittleJack Sheppard" full of lyrics--solos, duets, quartets and choruses, allof them set to new airs by competent composers. At the same time, theauthors took care not to omit the element of punning dialogue. In thisrespect the old traditions were to be maintained. Byron, for instance,might very well have written the lines which follow, in which theinterlocutors strive to outdo one another in the recklessness of their_jeux de mots_:--
_Thames Darrell._ Wild and Uncle Roland trapped me, They caught this poor _kid napping_, and _kidnapped_ me; Put me on board a ship in half a crack.
_Winifred._ A ship! Oh, what a _blow_!
_Thames._ It was--a _smack_! When out at sea the crew set me, Thames Darrell, Afloat upon the waves within a barrel.
_Win._ In hopes the _barrel_ would turn out your _bier_.
_Thames._ But I'm _stout_-hearted and I didn't fear. I nearly died of thirst.
_Win._ Poor boy! Alas!
_Thames._ Until I caught a fish----
_Win._ What sort?
_Thames._ A _bass_. Then came the worst, which nearly proved my ruin-- A storm, a thing I can't _a-bear, a brewin'_.
_Win._ It makes me pale.
_Thames._ It made me _pale_ and _ail_. When nearly coopered I descried a sail; They did not hear me, though I loudly whooped; Within the barrel I was _inned and cooped_. _All's up_, I thought, when round they quickly brought her; That ship to me of safety was the _porter_.
"Little Jack Sheppard"--which had for its chief exponents Miss Farren,Mr. Fred Leslie (a brilliant recruit from the comic opera stage),Mr. David James (who had returned for a time to his old love), Mr.Odell, Miss Harriet Coveney, and Miss Marion Hood (who had graduatedin Gilbert-Sullivan opera)--was followed at the Gaiety by "MonteCristo Junior," in which Messrs. "Richard Henry" presented a brightand vivacious travestie of Dumas' famous fiction, greatly aided bythe _chic_ of Miss Farren as the hero, and the inexhaustible humorousresource of Mr. Leslie as Noirtier. Here, for example, is a bit of thescene between these two characters in the Chateau d'If:--
(_Noirtier, disguised as Faria, pokes his head through the hole in the prison wall. He wears a long grey beard, and is clad in rags._)
_Dantes_ (_startled_). This is the rummiest go I e'er heard tell on!
_Noirtier._ Pray pardon my intrusion, brother felon-- I'm Seventy-Seven.
_Dantes._ You look it--and the rest!
_Noirtier_ (_with senile chuckle_). Ah! youth will always have its little jest. My _number's_ Seventy-seven: my age is more! In point of fact, I've lately turned five score: Time travels on with step that's swift, though stealthy.
_Dantes_ (_aside_). A hundred years of age! This prison's healthy, To judge by this old joker. (_aloud_) What's your name, sir? To which I'd add--and what's your little game, sir?
_Noirtier._ My name is Faria--I'm a ruined Abbe-- All through my country's conduct, which was shabby. They've kept me here since I was three years old, Because I wouldn't tell of untold gold-- Of countless coin and gems and heaps of treasure Which I'd discovered in my baby leisure-- (_chuckles_) But we will foil their schemes, and that ere long.
_Dantes_ (_aside, touching forehead significantly_). The reverend gentleman has gone quite wrong.
_Noirtier_ (_clutching Dantes wildly_). But, ah, they starve me! Hence thy strange misgiving-- For what's a parson, boy, without his living? Hast e'er a bone to give an old man squalid?
_Dantes._ Not me! They never give us nothing solid; They seem to think an appetite's unlawful: In fact, their bill of fare is fairly awful.
_Noirtier._ But now to business! You must know, fair youth, Though I in prison lie, I love the truth. Therefore---- But stay (_glancing suspiciously around_)--are we alone?
_Dantes._ Of course we are, old guy fox! (_business_).
_Noirtier._ Then now I will confess my little game.
(_Removes wig, beard, rags, etc., and appears in convict dress, with [77] conspicuously marked on breast._)
And so, behold!
_Dantes._ What! Noirtier?
_Noirtier._ The same!
Here, again, is the duet sung by the same characters in the course ofthe same scene:--
I.
_Dantes._ Here in this gloomy old Chateau d'If We don't get beer, and we don't get beef.
_Noirtier._ They never give us mutton or veal or pork, On which to exercise knife and fork.
_Dantes._ No nice spring chicken, or boiled or roast-- No ham-and-eggs, and no snipe-on-toast!
_Noirtier._ So no wonder we're rapidly growing lean On the grub served up from the prison cuisine.
(_With treadmill business_.)
_Both._ Poor prisoners we! Poor prisoners we! With skilly for breakfast and dinner and tea, And such d
ismal diet does not agree
_Noirtier._ With Seventy-seven!
_Dantes._ And Ninety-three!
(_Grotesque pas de deux_.)
II.
_Dantes._ Our wardrobe has long since run to seed, For _ci-devant_ swells we are sights indeed!
_Noirtier._ I shiver and shake, and the creeps I've got-- I'd give the world for a "whiskey hot!"
_Dantes._ And as in my lonely cell I lie, I think of _her_ and the by-and-by.
_Noirtier._ Don't buy or sell, or you'll come to grief, And never get out of the Chateau d'If!
_Both._ Poor prisoners we! etc. (_Dance as before._)
After "Monte Cristo Junior" there came, at the same theatre and fromthe pens of the same writers, a travestie of "Frankenstein," producedin 1887, with Miss Farren as the hero, and Mr. Leslie as the Monsterthat he fashions. Here much ingenuity was shown in the management ofthe pseudo-supernatural business connected with the Monster. Previousto the vivifying of the figure, Frankenstein thus soliloquised:--
_Frankenstein._ At last I am alone--now let me scan My wondrous figure fashioned like a man. All is now ready--every joint complete, And now to oil the works--and then--_toute suite_! O Science! likewise Magic! lend a hand To aid the awful project I have planned. (_Sings_) I've invented a figure Of wonderful vigour, A gentleman-help, so to speak; A chap automatic Who'll ne'er be erratic, Who'll live upon nothing a week It will fetch and will carry, And won't want to marry, Or try on the wage-raising plan; It will do all my bidding Without any kidding-- My Patent Mechanical Man. Now to my cell I'll post with due cell-erity, And do a deed that shall astound post-erity. But thrills of horror now run through my veins. What if I fail in spite of all my pains? A nameless dread doth in my bosom lurk. My scheme is good--but what if it won't work?
The Monster's first utterances were as follows:--
_Monster._ Where am I? also what--or which--or who? What is this feeling that is running through My springs--or, rather, joints?--I seem to be A comprehensive (_feeling joints_) joint-stock companee; My Veins--that's if they are veins--seem to glow---- I've muscles--yea--in quarts--I move them--so!
(_Creaks horribly all over: fiddle business in orchestra._)
Horror! I've broken something, I'm afraid! What's this material of which I'm made? It seems to be a sort of clay--combined With bits of flesh and wax--I'm well designed-- To see, to move, to speak I can contrive-- I wonder if I really am alive!
(_Sings_) If my efforts are vain and I can't speak plain, Don't laugh my attempts to scorn! For, as will be seen, I am but a machine Who doesn't yet know if he's born. I can move my feet in a style rather neat, And to waggle my jaws I contrive; I can open my mouth from north to south, I--I--wonder if I'm a-live, a-live! I wonder if I'm a-live!
In 1888 Mr. G. R. Sims and Mr. Henry Pettitt joined forces inburlesque, and the result was seen in a piece happily entitled "Faustup to Date." In this version Marguerite (Miss Florence St. John)figures first as a barmaid at an Exhibition. She is a young lady ofsome astuteness, though she insists upon her general ingenuousness:--
I'm a simple little maid, Of the swells I am afraid, I tell them when they're forward they must mind what they're about. I never go to balls, Or to plays or music-halls, And my venerated mother always knows when I am out. When I leave my work at night, I never think it right To talk to any gentleman I haven't seen before. But I take a 'bus or tram, Like the modest girl I am, For I know that my big brother will be waiting at the door.
Martha introduces herself thus:--
I'm Martha, and my husband's never seen; Though fifty, my complexion's seventeen. In all the versions I've one _role_ to play, To mind Miss Marguerite while her _frere's_ away. You ask me why she don't live with her mother, And I reply by asking you another-- Where is my husband? I oft wonder if The public know he left me in a tiff, And not a single word from him I've heerd Since Marguerite's mother also disappeared. Not that I draw conclusions--oh dear, no! The gents who wrote the opera made them go. And Goethe lets a gentleman in red Inform me briefly my old man is dead. These details show my character's _not_ shady-- I am a widow and a perfect lady.
When Valentine returns home and hears the scandal about his sister, hebreaks out into the following terrific curse:--
When to the drawing-room you have to go, With arms all bare and neck extremely low, For four long hours in biting wind and snow, May you the joys of England's springtime know! Whene'er you ride, or drive a prancing pair, May the steam roller meet you everywhere! When thro' the Park you wend your homeward way, Oh, may it be a Home Rule gala day! When for a concert you have paid your gold, May Mr. Sims Reeves have a dreadful cold! May you live where, through lath-and-plaster walls, Come loud and clear the next-door baby's squalls! Your husband's mother, when you are a wife, Bring all her cats, and stay with you for life!
At the end, when Mephistopheles (Mr. E. J. Lonnen) comes to claimFaust, it turns out that Faust and Marguerite have been duly married,but have been obliged to conceal the fact because Marguerite was a wardin Chancery. Moreover, Old Faust reappears, and insists that, as itwas he who signed the bond, it is he and not young Faust who ought tosuffer for it.
"Faust up to Date" includes some clever songs and some excruciatingpuns, of which these are perhaps the most excruciating:--
_Marg._ These sapphires are the finest I have seen.
_Faust._ Ah! what I've sapphired for your sake, my queen!
_Marg._ An opal ring, they say, bad luck will be; This one I opal not do that for me.
Again:--
_Mephis._ Along the Riviera, dudes her praises sing.
_Val._ Oh, did you Riviera such a thing?
"Atalanta," the travestie by Mr. G. P. Hawtrey brought out at theStrand in 1888, was fitted with prose dialogue, much of which was verysmart and amusing. The songs were numerous and well-turned, and certaindetails of the travestie were ingenious. Hippomenes, the hero, winsthe race he runs with Atalanta, by placing in her path a brand-new"costume," of modern cut and material, which she finds it impossiblenot to stop for. For the rest, while possessing a decidedly "classical"flavour, "Atalanta" was, in essence, a racing burlesque, aboundingin the phraseology of the turf, and introducing in the last scenecounterfeit presentments of a number of well-known sportsmen.
An agreeable cynicism ran through both the talk and the lyrics, fromone of which--a duet between King Schoeneus and his High Chamberlain,Lysimachus--I extract the following satire on turf _morale_:--
_Lys._ There's a time to win and a time to lose.
_Sch._ Of course, of course, of course.
_Lys._ You can make 'em safe whenever you choose--
_Sch._ By force, by force, by force.
_Lys._ Then doesn't it seem a sin and a shame To stop such a pleasant and easy game? If a horse doesn't win, why, who is to blame?
_Sch._ The horse, the horse, the horse.
* * * * *
_Lys._ If it's cleverly managed, I always think--
_Sch._ Proceed, proceed, proceed--
_Lys._ At a neat little swindle it's proper to wink.
_Sch._ Indeed, indeed, indeed! I don't understand what it's all about; But a man must be punished, I have no doubt, If he's such a fool as to get found out.
_Lys._ Agreed, agreed, agreed.
_Lys._ It's all because jockeys have played such tricks--
_Sch._ They go too far, too far.
_Lys._ That the stewards are down like a thousand of bricks--
_Sch._ They are, they are, they are. For a season or two, you'll observe with pain, They'll hunt out abuses with might and main; Then the good old times will come back again. Hurrah, hurrah, hurrah!
Elsewhere, there is a diverting bit of parody suggested by the extremecautiousness and bad grammar of some newspaper racing prophecies.Hippomenes and Atalanta are the sole competitors in the race, and thelocal "tipster" thus discusses their prospects:--
I have from time to time gone through the chances of the several competitors, so that to repeat what I have written is to go over very well-worn ground. Although the race is reduced to a match, it has lost none of its interest in the eyes of the public. It is a difficult race to meddle with, but the plunge must be made; I shall, therefore, give my vote to Atalanta, which, if beaten, it may be by Hippomenes.
Of "Joan of Arc," the "operatic burlesque" written by Messrs. J. L.Shine and "Adrian Ross" to music by Mr. Osmond Carr (Opera Comique,1891), the distinguishing feature--apart from the fact that the musicis all original and all the work of one composer--is the neatness ofthe lyric writing, with which special pains appear to have been taken.Of Joan herself her father is made to sing as follows:--
Oh, there's nobody adepter Than our Joan, Joan, Joan! She is born to hold a sceptre On a throne, throne, throne; She's the head of all her classes, And in fervour she surpasses All the Hallelujah lasses, As they own, own, own!
Don't call her preaching dull, for It is not, not, not! She can do Salvation sulphur Hot and hot, hot, hot! She can play the drum and cymbal, With her fingers she is nimble, And the pea beneath the thimble She can spot, spot, spot.
She can tell you by your faces What you'll do, do, do; She can give you tips for races Good and new, new, new! She can cut a martial swagger, She's a dab at sword and dagger, And will fight without a stagger Till all's blue, blue, blue!
Of all the songs in the piece, however, perhaps the most vivacious isthat in which De Richemont (Mr. Arthur Roberts) describes how he "wentto find Emin":--
Oh, I went to find Emin Pasha, and started away for fun, With a box of weeds and a bag of beads, some tracts and a Maxim gun; My friends all said I should come back dead, but I didn't care a pin, So I ran up a bill and I made my will, and I went to find Emin! I went to find Emin, I did, I looked for him far and wide, I found him right, I found him tight, and a lot of folks beside; Away through Darkest Africa, though it cost me lots of tin, For without a doubt I'd find him out, when I went to find Emin!
Then I turned my face to a savage place, that is called Boulogne-sur-Mer, Where the natives go on _petits chevaux_ and the gay _chemin de fer_; And the girls of the tribe I won't describe, for I'm rather a modest man. They are poor, I suppose, for they're short of clothes, when they take what they call _les bains_! And they said to me, "_Oh, sapristi!_" and the men remarked, "_Sacre!_" And _vive la guerre aux pommes de terre_, and _vingt minutes d'arret_! _Voulez-vous du boeuf? j'ai huit! j'ai neuf!_ till they deafened me with their din, So I _parlez_'d _bon soir_ and said _au revoir_, for I had to find Emin!
* * * * *
And at last I found Emin, poor chap, in the midst of the nigger bands Who daily prowl, with horrible howl, along the Margate sands; I heard the tones of the rattling bones, and I hurried down to the beach-- Full well I know that they will not go till you give them sixpence each! Said they, "Uncle Ned, oh! he berry dead, and de banjo out ob tune! Oh! doodah, day! hear Massa play de song of de Whistling Coon! If you ain't a snob, you'll give us a bob for blacking our blooming skin"-- But I took that band to the edge of the sand, and there I dropped 'Emin!
I have not thought it necessary, in the preceding pages, to offer anyapology for stage burlesque. One must regret that it sometimes lacksrefinement in word and action, and that in the matter of costume itis not invariably decorous; but that we shall always have it with us,in some form or other, may be accepted as incontrovertible. So longas there is anything extravagant in literature or manners--in the wayeither of simplicity or of any other quality--so long will travestiefind both food and scope. That is the _raison d'etre_ of theatricalburlesque--that it shall satirise the exaggerated and the extreme. Itdoes not wage war against the judicious and the moderate. As H. J.Byron once wrote of his own craft:--
Though some may scout it, ... Burlesque is like the winnowing machine: It simply blows away the husks, you know-- The goodly corn is not moved by the blow. What arrant rubbish of the clap-trap school Has vanished--thanks to pungent ridicule! What stock stage-customs, nigh to bursting goaded, With so much "blowing up" have been exploded! Had our light writers done no more than this, Their doggrel efforts scarce had been amiss.
In this defence of his calling, Byron had been anticipated by Planche,who, in one of his occasional pieces, introduced the following passage,in which Mr. and Mrs. Wigan and the representatives of Tragedy andBurlesque all figured. When Burlesque entered, Tragedy cried out--
Avaunt, and quit my sight! let the earth hide thee. Unreal mockery, hence! I can't abide thee!
_Burlesque._ Because I fling your follies in your face, And call back all the false starts of your race, Show up your shows, affect your affectation, And by such homoeopathic aggravation, Would cleanse your bosom of that perilous stuff Which weighs upon our art--bombast and puff.
_Mr. Wigan._ Have you so good a purpose, then, in hand?
_Burlesque._ Else wherefore breathe I in dramatic land?
_Mrs. Wigan._ I thought your aim was but to make us laugh.
_Burlesque._ Those who think so but understand me half. Did not my thrice-renowned Thomas Thumb, That mighty mite, make mouthing Fustian dumb? Is Tilburina's madness void of matter? Did great Bombastes strike no nonsense flatter? When in his words he's not one to the wise, When his fool's bolt _spares_ folly as it flies, When in his chaff there's not a grain to seize on, When in his rhyme there's not a grain of reason, His slang but slang, no point beyond the pun, Burlesque may walk, for he will cease to run.
FINIS.
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"The story is romantic and interesting enough to delight boys andgirls alike, and the adventures with the Trauco people are as novel asthey are thrilling."--_Daily Graphic._
LONDON: HENRY & CO., 6, BOUVERIE STREET, E.C.,
AND AT ALL LIBRARIES AND BOOKSELLERS'.
THE NEW ROMANCE. At all Libraries and Booksellers'.
_BY CLIVE HOLLAND._
=RAYMI; or, The Children of the Sun.=
By the Author of "The Golden Hawk." Crown 8vo, tastefully bound, 5s.Illustrated.
"Of all the writers who may be described as belonging to the schoolof Rider Haggard, Mr. Clive Holland is the most original and themost successful. His 'Raymi' would do no discredit to Mr. Haggardhimself. There is room for improvement in the style, but that willcome with use. What is of more importance in a new (and presumablyyoung) writer is that he should have the root of the matter in him;and in all the essentials for a good story--character, 'go,' andincidents--Mr. Holland manifests great facility. Hugh Carton, thehero, is put through some sad and dramatic experiences, and not theleast enthralling of these is his encounter with Richard Savill, thebuccaneer. It is under the most extraordinary circumstances that Hughmakes his acquaintance. Savill is vigorously drawn, so that one isable to realise the man as he was in his habit. Another part of thevolume which contains several graphic passages is that devoted to adescription of the Children of the Sun, with their rites and customs.Mr. Holland has written a previous romance, with which we are notacquainted, but his present venture certainly warrants the expectationof good work from him in the future."--_Daily Chronicle._
"This is a good story--a mixture of the real an
d the romantic. Bothelements are well worked out: the real is so like to Nature, that weare ready to think that the marvellous is not so very remote fromit."--_Spectator._
_BY LADY FLORENCE DIXIE._
=GLORIANA; or, The Revolution of 1900.=
With Portrait. Crown 8vo, 6s.
"There is abundant play of fancy in the book, as well as some of theordinary elements of romance."--_Queen._
"A good many of the characters have a touch of individuality; and in aliterary point of view this book is more carefully written and is moreinteresting than any of our author's previous works."--_Athenaeum._
"A prose Revolt of Islam."--_Saturday Review._
"It is a book that cannot fail to interest any one who takes it up;and to any one who thinks at all it will, as it has done for us,afford a good deal to think about. It is full of exciting incidentsand adventures closely drawn from life."--_St. Stephen's Review._
"Giving the clever and accomplished novelist all credit forearnestness of purpose, it is scarcely possible to accept whollythe form in which she has urged and illustrated her views; still wemust respect and admire the talent with which she pleads the causeshe has so much at heart.... The tale is well written, vigorous, andinteresting."--_Life._
_BY MRS. A. S. BRADSHAW._
=WIFE OR SLAVE?=
By the Author of "A Crimson Stain," etc. Second Edition. Crown 8vo,cloth, 2s.
"This story, which has no small merit as a work of imagination, makes its more direct appeal as a fictional presentment of the arguments for advancing the legal status of women, and making marriage a 'co-operation' rather than a 'despotism.'"--_Scotsman._
LONDON: HENRY & CO., 6, BOUVERIE STREET, E.C., AND AT ALL LIBRARIES ANDBOOKSELLERS'.
* * * * *
Transcriber's Notes
Variations in spelling, accents, punctuation and hyphenation areas in the original, except in cases of obvious typographical error.
The use of upper or lower case at the beginning of abbreviatedproper names (e.g. a'Beckett and A'Beckett) is inconsistent. Thisinconsistency has been retained.
Page 9 "whether they have borrowed from or author, I leave the readerto determine." the or has been changed to our.
Italics are represnted thus _italic_ and bold thus =bold=.
A Book of Burlesque: Sketches of English Stage Travestie and Parody Page 12