“I have one that isn’t plaid,” she offered with a quirked brow. “But really we need clothes, a shower chair, and some soap that doesn’t smell of strawberries.”
“I’m kinda liking the strawberries,” Onyx said as the pillow rose a bit and the two shared a knowing look.
“Yeah, way too much fucking info on that.” Red packed up his bag. “It’s just for a few days. Your new sleeve is in the clinic. I’ll have Hollywood get your shit together and bring it out here. You good with one of us riding your bike out here? It’s still downtown by the bar.”
“I could drive it,” Topaz said then quickly caught the gaff. “Never mind. Why don’t you just have Baldy load it up on the flatbed and bring it out, that way they can put his shower chair in the cab of his truck.”
“That’s why we all need Ol’ Ladies, they’re smarter than us.” Red stood, stripping off his gloves and then turned to Topaz. “It’s simple wound care, give it a few hours. When you can let it air out. Later, I want a full debrief from you two on what happened.”
“K,” Topaz said with a nod as she gathered a few items of clothes, including Onyx’s. “I’m gonna wash what we have and get some food for us.”
When she left, Red turned to him. “She really yours?”
“Yeah, God help me, I think I love that woman.”
“Fuck man, we’re gonna be a sorry group of bikers, all loved up.”
“And having babies,” he said running his hand over his face.
“It wasn’t just when you got home, was it?” Red asked.
Onyx shook his head.
“I wouldn’t worry too much.”
Onyx stared at him. “Is that your nice way of saying—”
“I’m not saying anything,” Red said as he stepped out of the room, but stood in the doorway. “Doctor- patient… you know the drill.”
Onyx nodded. “She is a good woman though, isn’t she?” It wasn’t really a question, more a statement of a fact.
“They don’t tend to stay here if they aren’t.”
14
Topaz woke up and stretched. She hadn’t been this sore in a long time. For two days and even two more glorious nights, she and Onyx had made love so many times, she lost count. Learning how the sleeve worked on his leg once she determined he had enough of a scab to make it safe to reapply it. The limited movement was painful to watch because he felt like less, but in her eyes, every move he made showed his strength.
Wanted or not, she had to go back to work today, just as a manager not dancing. Dances were for Onyx now and others once their relationship was one fully. Right now, they were discovering each other both in and out of bed. He preferred listening to music, over watching movies or TV. She’d grown up in a town closer to Turnabout Creek than LA, so they shared mutual stories from school finding more similarities than differences. Getting up, she quickly picked out a pair of jeans, t-shirt with the restaurant’s logo on it and a pair of socks. She got dressed then left her room.
Walking into the large dining room of the clubhouse, she decided to skip breakfast and all the questions to a quiet morning at her job. Getting into her car, she made the trip into town toward the restaurant. She remembered the night Onyx and she had been taken it was bittersweet.
If it hadn’t been for that fateful day, would they have a relationship at all? Or would they still be at odds, her fear trumping any chance at love? She was pleased how well they were getting along. The sex was excellent and when she fell into his eyes, the world went away. A future so simple with a path laid forth like petals from a rose. And then she’d close her eyes and the nightmares would start and she didn’t know if she could let the past go?
Inside the restaurant, several girls were already at work. They were using the stage to practice their routines. Zoe, Tempest, and Free. They stopped doing their dances, slid off the stage and rushed to her.
“Topaz what happened?” Free asked pulling her into a big hug. “I thought I’d get to ask Onyx, but he’s been staying with you? Are you sure you’re safe?”
“Onyx and I were taken by those limp dicks at ACT UP. A couple of men tied us up and stuffed us in a cabin where we escaped and now were home. That’s it.” Topaz took a step back.
“That’s serious. What aren’t you telling us?” Free grasped her hand.
Topaz didn’t want to tell anymore to these girls. She was tired of thinking about it and had avoided anyone she could while getting food at the clubhouse. Giving excuses like she wanted it hot when she got it upstairs, so she needed to move on. Onyx was the one that got the brunt of what happened to them. He should be the one to tell them if he wanted his business known. At some point, she might be called to church to explain her side, but what did she know that he didn’t? Very little. Besides, she spent most of in the fetal position trying to block out the cries for help.
“I really just want to get to work. Why don’t you all go and practice and do what you’re good at.” She walked to the office leaving the girls standing and staring after her.
Sitting down behind the desk, she tried to concentrate on anything, but what happened to them. Leaning back, she thought back to when she last dreamed of anything past the next moment. To Byron and dreaming.
“You can get a degree in hopscotch for all I care,” Byron said as she filled out the paperwork for the University of Arkansas. His fingers weaving with her left hand so her right was free to keep writing. “Because three years, four max I declare for the draft and we’re set for life.”
“Hmmm,” Sarah mused, the end of her pen bouncing on cheek. “Hopscotch huh? How about biochemistry.”
“Really?” He smiled and his face lit up the way it did when she amused him. “Gonna be a doctor?”
“No, but they don’t have hopscotch as a major,” she teased as her finger trailed down the list of programs. “What about hospitality management? Then I can be the hostess with the mostess.”
“You’ll be able to hire people, but sure go for that,” he said uncurling from her and picking up his football. “After freshman year, we can live off campus you know.”
“Before I beg my Nanna to spend this money and send this in, tell me truthfully. You really gonna pick Arkansas?”
“Of course, those other coaches are gonna keep sniffing. The more I get asking, the bigger my draft prospect will be.”
“But that’s years away.”
“And still…” He tossed the football up in the sky then caught it with one hand. “We had to move here because we lost everything in Katrina. At least we had a place to go, but we came as a family. Now you’re part of that family, Sarah.” He straddled the picnic bench she was sitting, her backside pressing to his thigh. “When we ran I thought I was going to die. Watching the water rise with only our feet to carry us.” He brushed back her long hair and leaned in for a gentle kiss. “I prayed for an angel and I was sent you.”
“Angel huh?” she said as she signed the last line of her application.
“I know you don’t want to be far from your Nanna. That’s why I have no problem staying here. Razorbacks are ready for me as a quarterback.”
Everything was simple in his mind. Win the conference, work his way to state, win it, then graduate early, so he could start in the Spring term. She would stay behind, but he’d come back for prom and kiss her at graduation before she moved to Fayetteville too. Everything would have her away from New Bend before the summer heat hit.
A card stuck out from under the laptop and she tugged to see Doc’s number. Sending her a quick text, she requested a session. Topaz had pushed so many men aside over the years. Completely blocking her own happiness, even now, nerves ate at her body and psyche and she knew she would have to come to terms with what had been, so she could have what is. The love being offered by a man who saw past her pain and found the sliver of her heart that was still alive.
When her phone buzzed, she glanced down to see a message from Doc. I have time at one, so glad to hear from you again.
His head pounded as he pushed away from the table. He had voting rights, being and enforcer and all, but telling his tale in church only made Onyx need the freedom to ride.
“I need air.” Leaving the meeting room, he cut through the clubhouse and stepped on the porch.
He was followed by Bounty, Hollywood, Baldy, Cass, Hack and Freaky.
“Last time I checked, I wasn’t a fucking duck. There a reason ya’ll are out here?”
“We all breathe,” Cass said, rage burning in his eyes.
Maybe Onyx shouldn’t have added the part about the kids in front of the man with three.
“I’m going to ride, tell me what you decide in there.” Onyx fished out the keys to his bike and stepped off the porch only to see the men doing the same. “You don’t need to go,” he snarled, this was about him clearing his head. Settling back to the norm. He understood the pain that needed to be released at a tempered rate because there was no second chance for him. There would be no questions why he did what he did if he didn’t calm down his rage and let it go like so many others had in the past.
“The hell we don’t,” Red announced as he got on his bike. “You’re not going out there alone. If you go for a ride then we all go for a ride. Until we deal with ACT Up nobody is going alone.”
Where in the hell did he come from? Onyx didn’t know he was just there. Wasn’t the man still in Church. Reviewing shit? “Red, you don’t need to go with and neither do these men. I can go alone. I just need to ride, I have a lot on my mind.” Onyx tried once again to convince the men they didn’t need to go with him.
“Get on your fucking bike and just ride,” Hack ordered. The former Navy SEAL didn’t mince words and though most men didn’t cross others in the Steels, Hack was the quiet storm everyone feared on the horizon.
The only solace came from the fact that not one man in the room questioned him. They didn’t think he imagined or misinterpreted. Belief, like the belief in his ability to save them. The same belief Topaz had in her eyes, fueled his hope for the world. Fresh air, freedom and sunshine from the ride was necessary to clear his mind. A lot had happened to him in the last few days. Topaz would be okay, but he wasn’t sure he would be. Losing his leg had fucked him up, but not like this. The words spewed at him running in an endless loop making him feel helpless and hopeless. There was no turning it off. There was no hitting pause. The men were dead, but thousands more were lined up behind them eager, and possibly jealous they hadn’t gotten to join what they thought was fun.
Onyx straddled his bike and started the engine.
The volume on the roar doubling then tripling and soon it became deafening as the brothers, disgusted by his account and the picture he painted showed they had their own shit to process.
One good thing his new sleeve had come in and even though his leg was still bruised, it felt good for the first time in a long time. Drugs, the love of a good woman and rest had healed a part of him. At least when he rode, he no longer would have a thousand needles pushing through his hip from the pain. Sure, pain meant you were alive, but damn man there are limits. He had that going for him now.
Taking to the road, he headed down the highway to freedom. It felt good to be on his own bike again and taking control of his own life. Even though as he checked his mirrors, he was surrounded by his brothers, he felt alone and independent. Red let him take the lead and decide where he wanted to go.
What did he have to offer Topaz? Not a damn thing. He had left his life in LA to come to this bum fuck town in Montana where the only job came from his club. He found a brotherhood, but that was all he found. Now, he had a woman he was sure he was falling in love with and he had nothing to give her, but himself. The home he lived in was Hollywood’s and the money he made came from the MC and the repairs he completed. Would it be enough for her?
Onyx wasn’t sure it would ever be good enough for Topaz. She was a strong woman who had been with an MC for a long time. First in New Mexico then in Montana. More than likely, she had fucked most, if not all, of his brothers could he deal with knowing that? Her riding bitch with Mountain nearly sent him over the edge. Jealously rose up in the pit of his stomach like a Kraken summoned from the deep. Glancing in the mirror once again, he saw Hollywood riding in twos with Hack. Men who’d both been with Free, but in the group of men behind him Red and Cass may be the only ones that hadn’t slept with the woman. Still, they rode. Side by side. Neither man bringing up what had come before. The way Hollywood was with Free at home made him a bit envious and he understood the spike in jealousy that came from having tasted Topaz.
Feeling her body and holding her the night before then having to pass her off to Mountain. Fuck, he should have taken her on this ride. She’d yet to straddle his bike and hold on to his waist. The weight of her adjusting the ride as he took the curves only to have her be a part of the move. Would she be able to settle for just him? It had to be that way or nothing. He couldn’t do it if she wanted to continue her path in life. Unlike Hollywood, he couldn’t watch Topaz on stage and there would be no going into the back.
He knew now, he would have to talk to her about all that. But did he want to? Until they had taken care of ACT UP, he knew he needed to get his head in the game and take down their foes. He’d claimed her, but part of him still wondered if she looked at him like she looked at the rest of the club members? Self-doubt screamed through him as he continued his way down the highway. When he reached the turn off to the State park, he decided to go inside and have a tour of the park.
Cutting into Bighorn Canyon National Rec, he marveled at the high rock cut. It was a beautiful place and peaceful. It took a bit to find a place where he could be near the water’s edge by the seemingly vast Bighorn Lake. Parking, he shut off his motorcycle. Getting off, he walked to the ridge, picked up a polished rock and skipped four times across the lake’s smooth surface.
“You’re pretty good at that.” Hollywood walked up to him.
“Thanks I’ve been practicing.” Onyx threw another one and the same thing happened but only skipped three times across the water. “See.”
“Yeah, I say you’re pretty good now.”
Hollywood was one of only a few he ever let in from the PD over the years. He wasn’t blind to the looks he got from the others in blue, but Hollywood had never given him that look. It was why when he offered him a chance to still kick ass in the place he was raised a part of him thought maybe, just maybe Hollywood had been raised in a bubble in rural America, hell the world. Only a threat if it was earned.
“Didn’t get that from the Pacific,” Hollywood mused. “I do miss it some days.”
“The crash of the waves puts everyone in their tiny place in the world. One of those big swells you could get lost in, if you let yourself.”
“I can’t believe you talked me into surfing.” His friend shook his head. “But I get it, like this ride, when it’s right everything disappears.”
“And all that matters is you and the ocean. The men and women on the waves with you don’t give a shit about anything but taking in the beauty of it all.” Onyx bent to get another stone and then sent it flying into the lake, hitting five skips this time. “But the quiet is nice too.”
“What’s on your mind Onyx. Why the ride?”
Hollywood was his best friend and he considered him a brother deeper than any blood bond. “I just can’t settle in my mind about a lot of things. Being taken by those fuck tards and this Topaz thing I got going.” Onyx bent down, picked up a few more rocks and threw them. “Last week, all I wanted was for her to be civil to me.”
“Do you have an approximate time when the whole Topaz thing started?” Hollywood tease
d and picked up a few rocks himself.
Onyx cut his eyes at him.
“Hey, property taxes are due, man. I knew the two of you together was coming, so did Free.”
“Well, I didn’t.”
“And here I was thinking you were the smart one in the house.”
“I thought the ride would clear my head. Get me far enough away I wouldn’t think about her. Instead, all I’m thinking about is right now Topaz is probably on a pole with some—” Three rocks flew through the air slicing the surface without skipping this time.
“Personally, that shit turns me on. Watching men wishing they could, but knowing they can’t.” A satisfying smirk crossed his friend’s lips. “You’re acting like this was more than the world was gonna end last man on earth thing.”
“I might have claimed her,” the words rushed from his mouth as if they all came from the same breath as the air stilled around him.
“Might?” Hollywood asked. “Because Topaz isn’t some girl that doesn’t understand what it is to be claimed. You don’t need to explain to her what being an Ol’ Lady is. If you said it, really said you’re mine—”
“Her ex was lynched,” he said stopping Hollywood from speaking and glancing over his shoulder to make sure no one else heard. “Like, right in front of her. I didn’t say everything in church. She was in a ball in the corner.”
“Fuck man.”
“She didn’t jump up when the men left. She was rocking thinking I was dead, then thought I was a fucking ghost and she’d lost her mind.”
Hollywood ran his fingers through his dark brown hair as his jaw clenched.
“I’m a target. The little ones Chaos, Mayhem, Maddox, Lil’ Mama, Cream, fuck even little Beno and we know Hack is.” Onyx’s hand scooped up a hand full of rocks and began picking out the ones he couldn’t skip. “She won’t live through another loss like that. I shouldn’t have claimed her.”
“She claim you back?” Hollywood’s voice had a tone akin to when they worked the streets and his authority wasn’t to be questioned. “Because a woman who’s been through it, ain’t taking your black ass on lightly. She’s following her heart to the only place it can go.”
Topaz: Book 8 of the Steel MC Montana Charter Page 16