by Amy Brent
I wanted more, so I slid my hand under the material to stroke my bare pussy. My fingers slid through the soft curls that I kept, finding the swollen nub, and dragging my juices over it with a cry. I was soaked, and I used it to make my clit wet, allowing my fingers to glide over it harder and faster. I kept going and came with a jerk, trying to keep moving as my body exploded. I felt it all the way to my toes, and I closed my eyes as I smiled. It was a relief to finally feel real desire even if it was a bit late. I enjoyed the feelings as they coursed through me, ranging from intense pleasure to a sense of being completely satisfied.
I slowly moved up and towards the shower, turning on the hot water as I stripped out of my clothes. I stepped under the water and traced my hands over my curves, appreciating them for the first time in forever. I washed my body with my beloved peppermint soap as well as my hair, conditioning it so it would look nice for tonight. I was so excited to be going out on a date with Declan, even if it was out of the city. I wasn’t sure when it would be okay to date openly if that’s what he wanted, given that a large part of me was feeling insecurity over my joy. I dried my hair into silky waves and applied a little shadow on my eyes to bring out the color. I didn’t wear a lot of makeup usually, and tonight I just stepped it up a notch. I was going out, not to work or to run errands. I was going to dinner with a gorgeous man, and I wanted to match him on some level.
Once that was done, I glanced at the clock to see that I had a little over an hour to relax. We were going to leave earlier than some might consider dinnertime and make a whole night of it. I picked up the bag of pastries that Declan brought over and brought them into the kitchen, nibbling on another piece of a chocolate donut. I was eating too much crap and not going to the gym enough, and that needed to change. Declan wasn’t pushing for me to either, but we had crazy schedules. I suppose we couldn’t go in the mornings or evening like the people that worked regular day jobs. I shoved another piece into my mouth and thought about his wife. I didn’t see a close picture of her at his house, but I imagined her to be beautiful and kind since Declan was so fantastic. I could see that he loved her, even still, and felt so sad for his loss but hopeful that I could brighten his life up again, the way that he claimed I did.
The idea of giving him all of me seemed worth the pain and risk for a fleeting second. It felt like it would be worth all of it until I thought back to seeing Mom’s sad face as she worked endless shifts to keep us going. She told me that loved my Dad and how much he broke her heart when he left. I didn’t see her date until I was much older, and she looked happy now. Everyone deserves that, but I never wanted to try before this. I never wanted to let my walls down until now, and I was letting it happen so slowly. I picked up the phone to call Mom as I dropped into my chair, hoping that she was home. I wanted to hear her voice and talk to her about Declan. Maybe she could reassure me that things were going to be okay.
CHAPTER 9
Declan
I dressed in some black slacks and a dark green sweater since it was getting cooler out. I made my hair look like the proper mess that Laura always did for me, telling me how good it looked as I looked into the mirror. I knew that I was handsome and that women noticed me. They wanted me. I just didn’t think too much about it since I had Laura and now she was gone. I supposed that I was dating again, even if I had to drive hours away, so we could relax together.
I still wondered of Laura knew somehow that I was trying to live again. I didn’t believe that she might give me a sign to let me know, but I did like the idea of her seeing me here and there. I’d want to do that with her if I went first.
I grabbed a leather jacket and tossed it into the back seat before leaving. Madeline should be ready to go, and I wondered what she was going to wear. I wondered if she would smell like cherries and citrus like she did the night she bumped into me. It was intoxicating. I turned onto the main street and hummed along to the rock song that was playing in my car as I thought about the place I was taking her to eat. It wasn’t a fancy, overpriced place but more of a casual family restaurant that I discovered years ago. I told her to dress a step above casual tonight since I wanted to walk around when we were done and show her the shops in the quaint part of town. Wearing a cocktail dress and heels wouldn’t make it a good experience for Madeline, and it also didn’t seem to be her style. I made the next few turns to get back to her house and parked in the driveway as I watched someone leave the house across the street.
Shit. It was one of the head nurses, and I cursed as I realized that Madeline did live near the hospital in a pretty good neighborhood. Her house was the smallest one on this street, and I looked at it before looking in my mirror again. I let her go back into her house before jumping out and going up to Madeline’s door to knock. She opened it wearing a pair of black leggings with some leather boots and a long, flowered shirt that hung just past her stomach. It was soft and flowing, and I raised my eyes to look into her face. “Come in,” she said as I glanced behind me and stepped inside. “I just need a jacket.” I watched as she went to a small closet and pulled something out of it before grabbing a small purse and some keys. Madeline had something on her eyes that made them pop and a lip color that was a dark pink, but I leaned down to kiss her anyway. She looked too beautiful not to.
“Your neighbor works at the hospital,” I told her after we’d shared a few kisses and Madeline nodded.
“I saw her this morning, but I don’t think she saw you. Do you know her well?” she asked as I frowned.
“She was one of the first ones to hit on me after Laura got sick. By that, I mean before she was gone. That was before Nadine met her new husband, number four if I’m not mistaken.” I shook my head and looked out of the window. “I can see her spreading the good news if she figures us out.”
Madeline looked to see that the coast was clear. “Let’s go, then. There’s nobody outside.” She pressed her lips to mine for a long kiss, seeming to need the contact as much as I did. Madeline felt so good to me, and I held her face in my hands. I took her keys from her when we were leaving, locking the door, and leading her to my car. There I opened the door for her and made sure that she was safe before walking around to my side with a quick look across the street. Nobody was outside, and I breathed a sigh of relief as I started the engine. I didn’t want Madeline to be dragged through the mud at work when she was just starting out.
I made my way to the freeway and headed towards Streator, which was a couple of hours away. It was a cute little town, and we could walk around after dinner and see the countryside before that. It would be a great day, and I hoped that it would end at my place in bed, even if it were just holding her. “I love your car,” Madeline gushed as I grinned. She was my baby.
“I bought it last year. I got a bit of a raise and decided to get something new.” I didn’t mention that Laura had a new BMW when she found out that she was sick but ended up selling it.
“Mine is fifteen years old. I love it since it runs so well, but I know that someday I’ll need to get something newer. I am just biding my time though, trying to put away some money and save since I am making a real salary now.” Madeline smiled as I glanced at her, seeing such a simple woman.
“Smart move. There’s not need to jump into payments if you don’t have to and even that can be scaled down a lot. I wanted a Rover for years and decided that I could afford one.” I would have been happier with a smaller house, but Laura loved the location of ours, so we bought it. Being a career couple, we had a lot of money and could afford the finer things in life. That didn’t mean shit to me now, and I was craving experiences more than things.
“That’s true. I had plenty growing up without being spoiled, so I like the idea of taking all that slow. Some people have suggested that I move as well, but I like my house. It’s close to work, and it fits me just fine.” Madeline looked at me, and I felt the intensity of her gaze as my skin burned. She reached for me, and I felt her fingers interlock with mine as I fought the groan in
my throat. “Thanks for going to so much trouble tonight.”
“It isn’t. I love taking this little trip when I can, and I’m happy to have someone along for the ride.”
“Laura didn’t come with you?” I heard her ask as I felt the resentment that popped up when I thought about her job. We didn’t have the time to take these little trips since she only took time off for the bigger ones. By the time she was off work completely, Laura was too sick to go anywhere.
“Not often, no. We were heavily involved in our jobs.” I squeezed her hand as I spoke and lifted her hand to my lips slowly to kiss it. It turned out that Madeline hadn’t really been out of Chicago since she moved to Illinois, so I pointed out some sights and told a few stories about living here. She laughed a lot, and it made me happy to hear as we got closer to the town. Madeline loved it, and although I stayed on the road to drive through the country while we still had some light, she kept looking over with a curious gaze.
We drove through the curvy road that took us through the green hills, seeing farms and spread out houses. I knew of a lake up here and turned right as she gazed at me. “Where are we going?”
“I have a place I come when I’m here for some peace. I want to show it to you.” I grinned as I hit a smaller road and eased down it before pulling into the tiny parking lot of the lake. It was perfect since the sun was starting to lower and Madeline jumped out of the car to stare forward. “Like it?”
“This is amazing. I never imagined that something like this would be so close to a city,” she murmured as I walked to the front of the car to join her. I slipped an arm around her, pulling her against me as Madeline moved her arm over my stomach.
“I have a lot to show you then.” I had kissed her before the sunset came, wanting her to see it and still needing to taste her lips. Madeline melted into me, and I tugged her against my body as our tongues moved together hungrily. I remembered the look on her face as she came for me, longing to feel it against my finger or tongue as I tilted my head to deepen the kiss. God, I wanted her every time she was near me, and it was going to be hard to wait. I had to, though. I’d never force a woman into that kind of choice.
We watched the sun set as she shot some pictures with her phone and continued to the restaurant. It was an older building but big inside with a lot of tables. I always asked for the one near the fireplace, and the waitress hugged me when she saw me, telling me how sorry she was about my wife as she led me to my traditional table. I winced a bit with the reference since I was with Madeline but forced a smile on my face as she turned to look at me again. “Thank you, Marg. I am hanging in there.” I smiled towards Madeline as Marg’s kind brown eyes followed and took her in as well. She smiled.
“That’s wonderful. I’m Marg,” she said as she offered her hand to Madeline, who shook it with a shy smile.
“Madeline,” she replied as Marg took her in. She never met Laura, but she heard about the past couple of years when I’d come in to have a meal and just get away. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
“I can say the same. She’s beautiful,” Marg told me as she smiled her approval at me, making Madeline blush intensely. We sat down at the table, and Madeline read the menu as I caught up with Marg on her family. She had four kids and ten grandchildren and loved them all to pieces. When she left to get the coffee that we ordered, Madeline looked at me.
“I like her. I love this place.” She was beaming, and I took in the freckles on her nose.
“It’s a nice change from the city. I like eating there too, but there’s something about the feeling of this room for me. It’s like home, but I’ve been coming here since I started working at the hospital.” I looked at the menu that I hadn’t even opened. “Do you know what you want?” She ordered the burger when Marge came back, and I asked for the chicken fried steak. It wasn’t healthy, but it was damn good, and I liked to treat myself. Madeline’s eyes rolled back as she bit into the messy, juicy burger and I laughed at the joy on her face. We talked as we ate, and she told me a little more about her family in New York. Their love was evident as she spoke, and I wondered if I’d ever get to meet them. Laura’s parents lived in Alaska, and I liked them well enough, but we weren’t close. I hadn’t heard a word since the funeral, but with no kids, I wasn’t surprised a bit. There seemed to be a closeness with Madeline and her family that was rare these days, and I jumped forward in my imagination to holidays for just a moment.
Dear, God. Was I ready for that?
We left the restaurant and wandered down the street as she peered into the windows of the shops. They had everything here, and I gave her room to do what she wanted as I observed Madeline. She was like a kid when she saw something that she liked, and I ended up buying her a delicate necklace with a daisy as well as some soaps that were made by a local woman. She protested, but I insisted just to see the smile on her lips and feel her kisses once the transaction was completed. I’d buy her anything to see that, a thought that scared me. We ended the night walking back to the car and grabbing some ice cream at the local parlor before we headed home.
Madeline had packed a small bag to take to my house, and I glanced at it before starting the engine. We had a bit of a drive, and I watched as she looked over at me with a wicked smile on her face. Madeline leaned over to kiss me again, and I felt the heat in this one, feeling her tongue stroking my lower lip. I gave her what she wanted and groaned as the kiss deepened, and I considered pulling her right into my lap. “Want to head to my house?” I asked as she pulled away for air, not wanting to let her go.
“Sure,” she whispered before brushing her lips against mine one more time, tasting of strawberry ice cream. I pulled out of the lot and headed back down the dark road as Madeline got comfortable beside me. I missed days like this when I had more time just to wander. Life was so busy now, and I thought about all the vacation that I’d built up for more of this. Madeline didn’t have that much starting out, but I could make it work.
There I went again, planning our future together.
Madeline fell asleep halfway home, and I turned the radio on to a soft volume, finding my favorite rock station on Pandora. I glanced at her every now and then, seeing how peaceful she was in sleep and how cute she looked. I wondered if this was the plan for me since life had taken a sudden turn, and I wouldn’t mind if it were. When I pulled into my garage, I reached over and touched Madeline’s shoulder softly. It was so quiet, and I just listened for a moment before shaking her gently. She blinked and looked around as she stretched. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to fall asleep on you.”
“It’s fine. We were just driving.” I smiled at her as she got out and opened the back door for her backpack. I led the way inside, unlocking the door and leaving the light on the stove as the only one, not wanting to wake her up too abruptly. Madeline followed me and set her backpack down on the table as she stretched, looking adorable. I offered her some water or anything stronger, and she came over to the fridge with me and reached inside for a bottle.
“I don’t need to wake up too much considering I just want to go to your bed,” her voice was husky, and I felt my cock stir as she stood up to kiss me. My shy girl was getting bold, and I slid my hand into her hair to pull her closer to me. Our mouths crashed together as she pressed herself closer to me, brushing my groin with her body as I gripped her tighter. Holy hell. I shoved her against the counter as I deepened the kiss, sliding one hand down to cup her sweet ass as we both moaned. I had no idea how I was going to wait for this woman, but somehow, I knew she would be worth every second. Her lips were too sweet and her tongue so eager against mine as she slipped her arms around my neck. I felt like a teenager again as I pulled her closer to me, feeling her heat through our clothes.
“Come to bed,” I whispered to her as I pulled back for air, and she nodded before kissing me again. We made our way upstairs slowly in between long kisses before she dropped on the bed and pulled me on her.
I wasn’t sure what to do as she ate at my
lips hungrily, her hands roaming over me. Did she want me to take my clothes off? Did she expect me to take hers off? I was eager to see her bare before me and taste her skin, but I didn’t want to rush anything for her. I respected her fears, understood all of them. Hell, I admired that she had saved something so special and didn’t just give it to the first person that asked for her to sleep with them. I sensed from her kisses that she wasn’t completely inexperienced and that there were men in her past, working for the same thing that I wanted. What did they do wrong that I should avoid? What should I do differently?
I was so fucking confused as I hovered over her, resting on my hands, so I didn’t crush her. I had a few inches on Madeline as well as pounds, and I didn’t want to hurt her, even though I knew there were ways that I could enjoy it. I wanted to suck her clit into my mouth and make her scream my name, sliding my fingers into her tight core to feel the heat wash over my hands. I wanted to drive my cock into her slow and deep to spread her open before I fucked her hard and fast. The feel of hands on the hem of my sweater brought me back to reality as I looked down at her with lust-filled eyes. “Take it off.”