by Amy Brent
“Hey, Quinn,” Leo said softly and I jumped. I hadn’t realized he had followed us outside, “Are you okay?”
I turned the question over in my head. It wasn’t about if I was okay. It was about if Leo was still going to be okay after Jonah got over the shock and his temper kicked in.
“I have to go after him.”
“I know. I can drive you-.”
“No. I need to go on my own. If he sees you again right now…” I let the thought trail off. It was too painful to finish. I glanced at him from the corner of my, watched him reach one hand out toward me pleadingly before letting it fall listlessly to his side.
"You don't have to do this alone." He finally said, the words rough like sandpaper as they fell into the open air between us. But he was wrong. This was something that I had to do alone. It was time to face Jonah. And I would have to live with the consequences.
“I’m sorry, Leo,” I mumbled, already walking to my car, “I have to go.” I prayed he wouldn’t follow after me. I was afraid I wouldn’t have the strength to say no to him a second time if he offered to come with me.
I was shocked to realize that he’d become a safety net to me over the past few months. The person I turned to when I had a problem or needed comfort. Because I knew he would wrap me in his arms and keep all the monsters away. But this was one monster he couldn’t defeat. I’d have to face this one on my own.
The sound of the driver’s side door slamming shut seemed overly loud and my ears rang with a buzzing noise like an alarm going off in my head. I met Leo’s eyes once more, his gaze questioning and restless, as if he was moments away from charging forward but before he could I started the car and drove down the long driveway, kicking up a cloud of dust as I left the Mayhew house.
I pulled in front of the apartment building I shared with Jonah and parked, sitting there for a long moment. I didn’t even remember the drive there. My mind was filled with dread and I had a sour taste in my mouth like bile. This wasn’t going to go well. I already knew that, but it didn’t stop me from getting out of the car and forcing my feet to carry me forward.
I didn't stop until I was standing in front of the door. The dilapidated apartment building loomed large and intimidating in front of me but one thing gave me the strength to open the door and walk inside. And it was Leo.
That first night together had been all about fun, forgetting about my failures, losing myself in him so I wouldn't have to face my problems. But things had changed between us. Grown deeper, more intense. And in the end, he'd actually helped me to face my problems head-on rather than trying to avoid them.
I walked inside but stopped on the threshold, frozen by the look of disappointment and anger that Jonah shot me from his seat in the kitchen. He didn't come any closer, didn't move at all except to open his mouth and speak.
“How could you have been so st-.”
“I’m in love with him.” The words flew out of my mouth like startled birds and I surprised myself nearly as much as I surprised Jonah.
“What did you just say?”
"I'm in love with Leo," I said the words again, tasting them in my mouth, something strange and new and terrifying but at the same time, perfectly right. "I'm in love with him, Jonah."
“You’re in love with him? Leo? Leo Delaney?” Finally, Jonah rose to his feet, walking towards with a plaintive look on his face, “Are you sure we’re talking about the same Leo?”
“I know, it sounds crazy.”
“No, it doesn’t sound crazy, Quinn,” Jonah huffed, “It sounds downright mental.” He was shaking his head as pulled to a stop in front of me. “The man is the worst womanizer I’ve ever met. He’s got a different woman in his bed every night, he’s slept with all the single women in Coral Springs, and half of the married ones! And he messed around with my sister! How dare he-.”
"Jonah, listen to me," I interrupted, seeing the red-hot anger erupt again as he spoke, "He's different. He's changed. We both have."
“I don’t believe it, Quinn. And neither should you.”
“It’s the truth.”
“It’s not, Q. He’s playing you, and I’m not going to let you get hurt.”
“What are you going to do, ground me?” I snorted, “Forbid me from seeing him like I’m back in high school? You have to let me live my life, Jonah. Mistakes and all.”
“You’ve made plenty mistakes for a lifetime,” He shot out and his words hit their mark, hitting me square in the chest. For a moment it looked like he was about to apologize but then his expression hardened again.
“I’m going to fix this one, just like all the other ones.”
“I don’t need your help, Jonah. There’s nothing to fix!” I tried to plead with him, tried to make him understand but before I could get any more words out a pounding sounded from the ceiling.
"You kids keep it quiet down there! I'm trying to watch my programs!" Lola's haggard voice reached us from the second-floor apartment and Jonah and I shared a look. It was so much like old times that for a moment I thought that my brother would relent, but then the moment was gone as if it had never been.
“Stay here, Quinn. Try not to get into any more trouble until I get back.” Jonah said, each word hard enough to make me flinch but I couldn’t stay silent as he stalked towards the door.
“Get back from where?” I called after him as he walked out into the night, “Get back from where Jonah?!”
But it was useless. He was already gone.
The nausea that had been with me since Jonah had burst in on us rose up with a vengeance and I barely made it to the bathroom, heaving until my stomach was dry. I had to bite back tears as I brushed my teeth, spitting into the sink to try and get the foul taste out of my mouth. The stress of the day had just built too much, leaving me drained.
With one last look at myself in the mirror, I shut off the light and left.
***
Leo
I glanced around Lucky's. It was still pretty quiet for a mid-week day evening but the regulars were scattered around the bar, drowning their sorrows in their beers.
"Just like me," I muttered to myself before taking another long swig.
“What was that, stud?” Stella asked from behind the bar as she wiped down glasses, stacking them in a neat triangle.
“Nothing, Stella,” I shot her a grim grin, “Just feeling sorry for myself.”
“Never had no use for that,” The bartender said, shooting him a sideways look. “I always say if you have a problem, best to deal with it head on, you know?”
"What if that problem wants to break my kneecaps and murder me for messing with his little sister?"
Stella went quiet for a long moment, “Is this about you and Quinn?”
I glanced up at her, my brows raised in question, “You know about that?”
“Honey, you ain’t been as secretive as you thought you were being. I started getting suspicious when you stopped hitting on anything that moved. And then I saw her coming around a few times. Don’t worry though, I’m the only one that knows.”
“That’s not true. Jonah knows now, too.” It hurt to say the words, as if saying them out loud made them more real somehow. Stella shook her head, pouring me another pint from the tap and sliding it in front of me on the bar.
“Here, stud. You’re going to need this.”
I rolled my eyes up at her, “Oh thanks. No words of wisdom?”
“Run. Get out of town while you still can.”
“That’s great. Super helpful, Stella. Really.” I rolled my eyes one more time, dread tightening in the pit of my stomach. She was just confirming what I already knew but it didn’t feel any better to hear it said out loud. I put the glass to my lips, downing half the beer in one gulp. Damn it. That didn’t make me feel any better either.
The hair on the back of my neck stood on end, the only warning I had before a very pissed off Jonah was charging towards me like an ill-tempered bull with me in his sights.
“Dela
ney! Don’t you fucking move!”
“Jonah, listen man! Just let me explain-.” But before I’d even barely got my mouth open to try and plead my case he was rushing me, one arm raised with his fist pulled back. I stood, frozen, waiting for the explosion to come and when it did, fireworks exploded behind my left eye as Jonah’s punch landed.
I sucked in a harsh breath as the sharp pain registered but a half a second later another blow smashed into my jaw sending me reeling against the bar. I propped myself back up on my feet, holding one hand out towards my best friend.
“Jonah, come on. You have to believe me. I never meant to lie to you.”
“Never meant to lie?” Jonah roared, “What the fuck else did you think you were doing?”
“I know. I know. And I’m sorry I didn’t come clean, but things are different with Quinn. I swear to you. She’s different.”
“You’re god damn right she’s different! She’s my sister, you asshole!” Jonah shoved a hard finger against my chest, “You knew she was off limits. You knew that. And you still went after her.”
“It was her choice too,” I spit out the words, the alcohol making me brave when I should be cautious but I didn’t see Stella’s look of warning, “She wanted me just as much as I wanted her-.”
Another punch landed, this time catching me by surprise and I shuffled backward but there was nowhere to go with the bar at my back as Jonah landed two more hits before I managed to push him back.
My face was swelling painfully, one eye starting to close but I had no problem seeing the red-hot venom in Jonah's green eyes, just like Quinn's, as he leaned close one more time.
“Leave town. Tonight.” The other man snarled, “Leave town or I’ll kill you. I swear I’ll do it, Leo.”
I looked up at him and could see the truth staring back at me. It hurt to see that look from a man I had come to think of as my closest friend. A small part of me had always thought he'd understand, that he'd forgive me. I realized then that I'd been wrong. So fucking wrong.
“I don’t care, Jonah,” I managed through my mangled, bloody lips, “I won’t leave Quinn. I’ll stay for her.”
“For her, or for you?” Jonah asked and I just met his gaze, glare for glare, but then his eyes narrowed and he fired his last shot and I knew I was done.
“If you don’t leave, I’ll sell the property. I’ll take it from Quinn and sell it to that developer and they’ll demolish it.”
“She loves that place, man,” I hissed, “She’d be fucking devastated.”
“I know. And it’ll be your fault. I’ll make sure she knows that.”
I stared at Jonah for a long moment as time seemed to slow to a halt. I knew how much Quinn cared about the bed and breakfast, how much of her heart and sweat and blood and tears she’d put into making it a success. It would kill her.
“Fine,” I forced the words out, and it was the hardest thing I’d ever had to do, “You win.”
“I want you gone, Leo. Tonight.”
“Tonight.” I nodded my head in agreement, defeat and heartbreak weighting me down like a million pounds of lead. “I’ll leave tonight.”
Chapter 23
Quinn
I looked around the empty apartment with a mixture of despair and disbelief. The night before I had cried myself to sleep after Jonah had left but I promised myself that the one moment of weakness was all I would allow myself. Then, I'd pick myself up, dust myself off, and figure out whatever the hell I needed to do to fix things between Jonah and Leo.
What about between Jonah and me? I thought desperately. I hadn’t spoken to him since he’d walked out the night before. I’d heard him stumble in sometime in the middle of the night but I hadn’t been up to talking to him again. I knew it would just turn into another argument and I could admit, to myself at least, that one argument with my brother in a day was enough for me.
But I hadn't seen him this morning either when I'd poured myself a cup of coffee before sneaking out to my car. My body had known where I was going before my brain did, but before long I knew where I needed to be. I needed to be with Leo.
Now, here I stood, shock filling me as I took in the sight of the empty apartment. Sometime between last night and this morning, Leo had packed up his possessions, the few that he had anyway, and he’d left.
I looked down at the bare wooden floor, surprised to find that there weren’t the shattered pieces of my heart littered around my feet. It hurt to draw in a breath but I forced the air in and out of my lungs, trying desperately to make sense of what I was looking at but my thoughts were slow and sluggish.
Everything felt numb as I turned and trudged back down the stairs, my mind still raging in chaos and my chest sore like I’d been stabbed and hadn’t healed all the way, the pain sharp and insistent.
My gaze found Stella standing behind the bar, like always. She wouldn't meet my eyes, keeping hers trained on the spot she'd been cleaning off the bar for the last few minutes but it didn't stop me from stumbling forward.
“St...Stella,” I had to stop and clear my throat before I could go on, “Um, Leo? His apartment is empty. Did something happen? Is he...did he leave?”
She cast me a sympathetic look before answering with a deep, heartfelt sigh, “He cleared out last night. He’s alright, he just left in a hurry that’s all.”
"Did he leave an address? A different phone number maybe?" My breath hitching as I forced the words out. My whole body felt cold like ice had just settled in my veins, "Any other way I could reach him? It's...It's important. I really need to talk to him."
“Sorry, honey,” Stella said, and she really was. I could see it in her eyes, “He didn’t leave anything like that with me. You know how he is.”
“Yeah. Okay. Thanks anyway.”
I turned to walk away but Stella hollered after me, her words making me pause.
“Maybe it’s for the best, you know?”
But all I could do was shake my head. “I don’t think so. I don’t think it is.” I kept walking, forcing my spine to stay straight when all I wanted to do was collapse on the floor in a heap of tears and anger but I made it to the women’s bathroom, pushing open the door and let out a sigh of relief to find that no one else was in there.
I pulled out my cell phone, dialing his number like I had eight times already before and for the ninth time, it rang a few times before going to voicemail. It wasn’t even his voice, just an automated, emotionless robot voice telling me to leave a message after the beep.
I hung up without leaving one. I'd already left several, at first calm, and then pleading. Growing angry, and then back to pleading again. The worst was the not knowing. It ate at me, gnawing at my insides like a sickness, making my stomach tighten with nausea and for the second time in as many days I found myself rushing to the nearest toilet.
It wasn’t until several moments later that I was able to pull myself back to my feet and out of the stall, stumbling towards the row of sinks. I washed my hands, doing my best to rinse my mouth out with the water from the tap.
I met my own tired gaze in the mirror hanging on the wall, takin in the bags under my eyes and the dark smudges like bruises from my sleepless night. I looked haggard and heartbroken.
Because I am, I thought to myself. For the first time in my entire life, I was truly heartbroken. And the fact that Leo had just packed up and left, not a word to me about where he was going or why. You know why.
I met my gaze in the mirror again, swallowing the sense of guilt. I did know. I knew how this would end. I knew that Jonah would eventually find out and do whatever he could to split us up. I just didn’t think he’d be successful.
It occurred to me then, that I'd been asking the wrong person for answers. Whatever had happened here, I could guarantee my brother had been involved. But I couldn't get a hold of him either. It left me with a sense of listlessness. Like I was all alone, adrift at sea with no one and nothing to anchor me, and no land in sight.
I would just have
to make it back to shore on my own.
***
Leo
I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket and even though I told myself I shouldn’t, that it was a mistake, I still couldn’t help but pull it out and glance at the screen. Sunshine. That’s what came up on the caller ID, and the sight of it stabbed me like a knife to the chest.
It wasn’t the first-time Quinn had tried to call me since I’d packed my things and left the town of Coral Springs in my taillights and it wasn’t the first time I’d been tempted to answer, tempted to tell her the truth about everything, explain that he’d had no choice but to leave. Jonah hadn’t left me one.
My thumb hovered over the green button to answer the call. I was seconds away from answering but then I remembered Jonah’s threat. I could remember the look on his face as he told me to leave, told me he’d do whatever it took to destroy Quinn’s dream if I didn’t.
Jonah had meant every single word he’d said, and every terrible consonant and vowel that had come out of his mouth had destroyed me just the same.
It felt like I was sawing off my own arm and throwing it away but it didn’t stop me from crushing the phone in my hand before throwing it in the nearest garbage can. I forced my feet to keep walking back out to the gas station parking lot where I’d parked my truck.
Everything that I owned in the world was backed hastily in the passenger seat, but it still felt like I’d left the most important thing back there in Coral Springs. There was a Quinn shaped hole in my life now, and I was terrified there always would be.