by Dane Bagley
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“Are you serious? Whoa,” said Kevin.
“She won’t come. I thought that with some time she’d come around—at least consider it. Instead, she’s becoming more and more adamant and angry about it.”
“John, what’s it been, two weeks? Giving a girl time, is a lot more than giving her a couple of weeks. You’ve still got months until the wedding. Change the subject, talk about the wedding. Build her house by the falls. It’ll still bounce around in her mind and once she knows that you’ll give her what she wants, maybe she’ll reconsider. She just feels vulnerable, like she’s never going to get what she wants. Help her know and then she may change her mind.”
“I don’t know. I don’t think so. It’s hurting our relationship. Sometimes she looks at me like I’m a foreigner, she’s so distant with me.”
“Well, what do you want?”
“What do you mean?”
“Do you want Sarah, or an adventure?”
“Both.”
“Yeah, but if you can’t have both, what do you want?”
“Kevin, I want both. I want Sarah more than anything in this world. But, I can’t have her and live happily with her, unless I do this. If I don’t leave, I have neither.”
“Man, I’m sorry. I feel like it’s all my fault. I’ve been putting these ideas about leaving in your head ever since we were kids. I always thought that it would be fun, but that I’d never be able to talk you into it. Now, you’ve got everything you’ve ever wanted and your about to risk it, for this.”
“Kevin, this is me. It’s not you, it’s me. I want this. Some of what you’ve said has made a lot of sense to me. But I’ve thought through it, and I’m going.”
“And what about Sarah?”
“I’ll ask her again. I really want her to come with me. But, I don’t think she will.”
“So, you’re going to marry her and then leave her?”
“No, no, no. I’m going first. Then, I’ll return with a full knowledge of things. If it’s dangerous, like she thinks, I’ll just marry her, settle down, and have a family. I’ll be preaching what she believes in, with a full knowledge. Everyone will know that it is a dangerous world and how valuable our protection is here. But, if it isn’t. If it is a wonderful place and a great place to settle. Then I’ll come with that message. If she loves me and I want to settle there, then maybe she’ll come. If she really still won’t, then I’ll settle here with her. I’m going to have both. I will not stay here forever. But I will return and I will be with her.”
“So, when are you going?”
“Soon, as soon as you’re ready.”
“What? Me? What are you talking about?”
“You’re coming with me, man. We’ve been talking about this for years. If Sarah won’t come, and I’m sure she won’t, we’ll go together. I don’t want to go alone. I want to go with you, if Sarah won’t come. We’ll have the greatest adventure of all time. We’ll see everything for ourselves and will no longer have to live wondering what is on the other side.”
“I don’t know, John. It sounds good, but…”
“Well.”
“Maryanne and I have been…”
“Maryanne? I’m talking about leaving Sarah. What do you care about Maryanne? She’s just your girl for now. We’ll wait until you break up and then we’ll go. I don’t care if we wait a week or two, or even a month.”
“Dude, watch it. Maryanne’s special. You know that. She’s not some girl, she’s a great girl. I’m not planning on breaking up with her.”
“She’s the one? You’ve been going out for three weeks and she’s the one.”
“I don’t know that for sure, but maybe. Besides, you knew Sarah was the one in seconds. How long does it have to take? She’s special and I don’t want to leave her. I don’t have her like you have Sarah. If I up and leave at this point I’ve got no guarantee that she’ll be there for me afterwards. Besides, this whole, ‘leaving the promise land,’ talk is teenage talk. It’s hormones and immaturity and adolescents. We’re men now, John. We don’t need to be playing these games. The real world is in front of us. Beautiful women, children, homes, grown up stuff. That’s where I’m at. I’m ready for that stuff. I think I’m passed the whole, ‘jolt out of the promise land,’ thing.”
“You’re that hung up over Maryanne, huh. That’s okay, I’ll wait it out. I’m not in a hurry, I’ve been holding this back forever. I just thought we could take off and be back by Sarah’s birthday. Once I’m back we’ll sort it all out and then be good. Maybe Maryanne doesn’t feel like Sarah feels. Maybe she’s up for an adventure, or maybe she’ll like you even more when you’ve proven yourself and come back.”
“I don’t know, John. I don’t think there is anything on the other side of those mountains that compares with what I’ve got here. It’s my fault that you’re like this. I’ll talk to Sarah and tell her that I’ve corrupted you. She can take it out on me. I know that she loves you, whatever craziness you do. She’ll be there for you.”
“Think about it, Kevin.”
“I will. I will, but I don’ know.”
Chapter 23