by nikki blaire
“Good.” She let go of the breath that she hadn’t realized that she was holding. “Daddy, you don’t ever regret marrying mom. Ya know, since she passed away. The pain. You don’t ever wish that you could go back and not…”
The question caught them both by surprise. She wanted to take it back right after she said it, but the words were flying free now.
“Never.” He said matter of factly. “Never marrying your mother would have robbed me of my happiest times. Maybe would have spared me my saddest, but I don’t measure my life by the sad moments, bebelle.”
Hearing her father’s words choked her up a little. It was exactly what she needed to hear at the exact moment that she needed to hear it.
“Thank you, Daddy.” She nodded to herself, finally working up the courage to do what she should have done weeks ago.
“Hey, you remember that guy that I introduced you to while you were here for your award’s gala.”
“Which one? The stuffy one with the wife or the funny guy? I think I gave him my card.”
“The funny one.” She giggled. “That one.”
“Yeah, why? What about him?”
“Well,” She slowly exhaled. “we’re dating. His name is Marc.”
“Oh, wow. That’s great, bebelle. I kinda figured something was going on. Never met anybody so damn pressed to meet me, but spent the whole time that we were talking staring at you.”
His laugh was hearty and infectious.
“Yeah, that’s Marc.” She shook her head, while she readied herself in the bathroom.
“He’s a character, but he’s a good guy. He’s good to me.”
“Well then, that’s all that matters. I’ll shoot him if he’s not. And I’ll get away with it. I’m a judge.” She could hear her father’s grin through the phone.
“Next time you’re in town, you two should spend some time together. So you can judge for yourself.”
“Oh yes, most definitely. You just tell me when.”
The two of them chatted until Charlisse got into her awaiting car for her trip to the doctor’s office. Admittedly, she could have moved her appointment to be there for Marcus’ interview with Sports Illustrated, but she wasn’t sure if she could handle another moment like the one they had last week.
Terry had texted her about Marcus’ response shortly after leaving them, but Charlisse just didn’t have the energy. She glanced at the unanswered message now, as she pulled up to her appointment.
We decided it was best not to tell anyone just yet.
She typed the message, then deleted it, then typed it again. Terry probably wasn’t going to believe it anyway, but she finally pressed send before getting out of the car.
“Good morning,” She smiled to the young lady at the front desk then made her way to the waiting area.
After waiting a few minutes, a nurse led her to the bathroom where she gave her usual urine sample for testing and gave blood before meeting the doctor in an examination room.
“Ms. Lageaux, how are you?” Her doctor smiled at her once she came into the room.
“Wonderful. How are you?” She greeted the woman who had been her gynecologist for several years.
“Wonderful.” She beamed while she looked over Charlisse’s chart. “I see you’re here for testing, but we may be able to fit in your pap smear too, dear. You missed your annual.”
“Oh, okay. Yeah, that makes sense. We should do that too. Sorry about that.” She flinched.
“No problem. It happens.” The doctor placed her clipboard on the table. “Go ahead and disrobe and then I’ll be right back.”
Her least favorite part of a doctor visit. Charlisse waited until the door was shut then pulled her loose fitting cotton dress over her head. Then pulled off her bra and underwear before yanking on the paper smock sitting nearby.
She felt so foolish sitting there naked with her back completely exposed. She checked her watch for the time and figured she would be out of here soon enough to meet Marcus before his interview was over. It mattered to him, so she could at least show up.
“Good.” She rocked her legs back and forth while they dangled over the table until a soft knock sounded on the door.
“Come in.” She called out just as the doctor was slowly peeking in.
“Ms. Lageaux,” She stepped inside with a look on her face that Charlisse couldn’t read. “You came in for testing, but did you mean for STD testing or for pregnancy. I just wanted to be clear.”
“For STD testing.” She now felt the need to explain herself. “I recently became sexually active with a new partner, so I thought I would,”
“Oh, no...no worries at all. No need to explain. I just wanted to be sure.” She looked at the chart in her hand then back at Charlisse.
“Sure of what? What’s wrong?” She was growing uneasy.
“Nothing is wrong at all, Ms. Lageaux, but I wanted to be sure because we did a quick urinalysis...and you’re pregnant.”
“Pregnant?” Charlisse had to repeat the doctor’s words to be sure that she heard her correctly. “How?”
The question fumbled out of her mouth before she could stop it. Of course she knew how a woman became pregnant, but she just didn’t understand how it could happen to her.
“I’ve been taking my birth control.” She flatly replied before the doctor could even get a word in.
“Birth control is not 100 percent effective, especially if you miss a pill, take certain medications or antibiotics. You’re on the progestin-only pill, Ms. Lageaux, are you sure you’ve been taking it at the same time every day.”
No, she hadn’t been, but she couldn’t say that out loud. Working on the Forde scandal had thrown her days out of whack, so she had been late a few times. Still, that shouldn’t have been enough to get her pregnant.
“Oh, shit.” She let her head fall into her hands.
“Ms. Lageaux, there’s a lot of options if you’re not comfortable with this pregnancy. I would say you’re about six to seven weeks pregnant. When was your last period?”
Charlisse had to think. She hadn’t really been keeping track, but before Marcus it hadn’t really mattered. She didn’t have the most regular period, hence taking the birth control, but now that she was having to think about it...it had been a while. And it had definitely been before Brandon and Vanessa’s wedding.
“It didn’t come this month. Now that I think about it.”
“That’s okay.” Her doctor reassured her. “We’ve got everything that you need to get this all figured out.”
She touched Charlisse’s arm in an attempt to calm her down, as if that was even possible.
*****
“That’s it. Perfect. Keep that stance and that face.” The photographer called out to Marcus while he posed.
The camera flashed again while a bright light shined in his face. He wasn’t sure exactly what “face” he was making that the cameraman loved so much, but he decided not to move so he didn’t mess it up.
“Yes, that’s it. You’re giving me real high-powered executive right now. Wealth, I feel it!” The cameraman kept snapping.
This was Marcus’ second outfit change and third round of pictures. He was exhausted, but still incredibly excited to see the final shots. His mood was a little down because Charlisse hadn’t arrived yet, but he was sure that she would get there eventually.
Who knew taking pictures was this hard.
He had a new appreciation for a profession that he never quite took seriously.
“Okay, let’s take a break.” The cameraman announced, which Marcus welcomed.
He walked off the set and sat in the chair that was designated for him. Someone brought him a bottle of water and a snack, while someone else touched up his face with a makeup brush. He wasn’t too happy about that, but the Sports Illustrated team had been insistent.
His phone vibrated on the desk near him, which grabbed his attention. He quickly scooped it up hoping that it was Charlisse, but to his disappointment, it
was Vanessa. He was about to ignore the text message altogether, but figured it had to be important for her to reach out. They hadn’t spoken since she made a scene in his office. He swiped the message open and quickly scanned it, just to be sure it wasn’t a waste of his time.
Brandon does a fundraiser every year and wanted to invite you. I gave him your personal email address. I know it’s a last minute invite. Just an FYI.
He balked at the idea of attending anything for Brandon Bridges. He didn’t think much of the man and also didn’t want to invite the drama that was likely to spark if he arrived with Charlisse. But, he definitely wasn’t going to go without her either.
Marcus opened his email and sure enough an invitation from Councilmember Brandon Bridges sat in his inbox. He opened it just to read exactly what he was declining, but was surprised to see that it was a men’s only event at Brandon's house.
That seemed like a less stressful situation, but he would definitely need to bring reinforcements. He didn’t trust Brandon at all, but would ask Charlisse about it once she got there.
Almost as if he conjured her up, Charlisse walked into the room. He couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face as she came closer.
“Are they putting makeup on you?” She laughed once she was standing next to him.
“They said I had to.” He grabbed her and pulled her between his legs after waving the makeup artist away.
“Did they?” She giggled, but he could tell that her smile wasn’t reaching her eyes.
Something was still wrong with her.
“Hey, I’m glad you’re here.” He still didn’t want to press her to share her feelings if she wasn’t ready. “I appreciate you.”
He ran his hands up her back and then rested his head on her stomach before inhaling her scent. He wasn’t sure what was wrong, but he hoped that his sincerity made it better.
“Thank you, Marc.” She ran a head over his head. “I really needed that.”
She leaned down to kiss his head then rubbed his shoulders.
“What’d I miss?”
He looked up at her with adoration in his eyes. He couldn’t have asked for anyone better. He knew Charlisse was probably the busiest woman alive, but still found a way to support him.
“Nothing too much. I just did a few pictures, but they haven’t done the interview yet.”
She looked over at the cameraman and then motioned for him to come over.
“Can I see a few?” She didn’t hesitate to grab the camera once he pulled up the previews of the pictures.
She flipped through a few, smiling at some, but shook her head at others.
“I like some of these.” She passed the camera back to the photographer. “Great work, but try not to look so mean, Marc.”
She shook her head at him. “You don’t always have to be so serious. Smile once or twice.”
“I’ll see what I can do.” He would definitely be smiling now that she was here. “Oh and Councilmember Bridges sent me this.”
He tried not to sound too obnoxious when he said the man’s name, but he couldn’t help it. Marcus had never been great at acting like he had respect for people that he really didn’t respect at all.
“Oh, yeah. He does this every year.” Charlisse took his phone to examine the email closer. “How’d he get your email address? He definitely didn’t ask me for it.”
“Vanessa.” Disdain was audible in his tone. “I wasn’t gonna go, but I figured you could tell me if it was worth my time.”
Charlisse paused to think for a moment. “I’m sure it’s all for optics. There's usually a good deal of political heavy hitters there and donors. I’m sure he’s just trying to get a check out of you.”
“Even after I handed him his ass at that award’s gala?” Marcus wasn’t so sure that Brandon had forgiven him that easily.
“You said you handled it, not that you handed him his ass.” Charlisse chuckled.
“But even still, money heals all wounds in politics, baby. I’m sure his campaign advisers have let him know how far a check from you can go.”
She sighed. “And I’m sure there’s a plus one. Bring Dwele or Tremaine since he’s your new CFO. It might be good to have people get to know him.”
“Hmm. I’ll think about it.” Marcus rubbed his chin.
“So, you and Vanessa still communicate?”
Charlisse’s question threw him off. “No.”
He stared at her awkwardly, feeling that there was more to the question. “We haven’t spoken since she came to my office that day a while back. She text me to tell me that she’d given Brandon my email. You wanna see the message?”
“No, not at all.” Charlisse backed away. “I wasn’t asking because of,”
She stopped and sighed, never finishing her sentence.
“I’ve had a rough day, Marc. That question didn’t even come out right.” She apologized.
“Can I get some water?”
She looked around for someone to help her, but Marcus just handed her the bottle of water that he had yet to open.
“Here, baby.” He opened it for her before she grabbed it. “Maybe you should go home and rest. Since your day has been rough.”
He was being honest. Having her here in a bad mood was worse than not having her here at all.
“No, it’s fine. I’m fine. I’m okay.” She took a long gulp of water then plastered on smile.
But Marcus knew that she was lying. Everything about her energy was frantic and ragged.
“Hey,” He pulled her back to him. “When are you gonna tell me what’s wrong?” He rubbed her back.
“A very smart person once told me that you have to talk to someone some time. She said it helps.”
A faint smile found its way to Charlisse’s face, but it still wasn’t her usual warm glow.
“We do need to talk.” She peered down at him. “Just not now. Okay.”
“Okay.” He grabbed her lips with his and locked them in a gentle kiss.
“I love you, Marc.” She whispered once they broke apart.
“I love you, too.” He replied and then stood up to get back to the set.
The crew was calling him. Plus, he wanted to get this over with. He trudged back to the set still holding onto Charlisse’s hand. For some reason, he felt like she would fall apart if he let go too soon.
“Now, I’m not one to brag,” He started as he walked to the set.
“You’re not?” She giggled.
“You’re right. I am, which is why I was about to tell you how your man is pretty good at this modeling thing.”
“My man,” She cut her eyes at him. “I mean, I saw the pictures. You’re alright. Don’t quit your day job though.”
They both laughed while the camera man snapped away. Yearning to be closer, Marcus brought her to him and then began to sway her to the music that played in his head.
“Marc, what are you doing?” Charlisse’s eyes gaped at him aghast, while the camera continued to capture the moment.
“I’m dancing with you.” He flatly replied right before spinning her around.
“But what about the camera? You just did an interview where you basically said that you were single.”
"Is that what this is about?"
The reason for her change in attitude dawned on him. She was doubting their relationship because of what he had said to Terry. He had to laugh to himself. Marcus had made that statement because of her and still, she was upset.
“I did that for you, Charlisse.” He sighed then dipped her before slowly bringing her back up to him.
“You were the one who kept wanting your privacy. You wanted to take your time. I thought I was saying the right thing.”
Charlisse looked away. “I know, but it…”
“Hurt your feelings.” He finished for her. “You know, it’s good to know I’m not the only one having a hard time dealing with all of these feelings.”
He chuckled while they slow danced. “They’ve been
kicking my ass ever since we met.”
She gave him a small smile, which was all that he was vying for. “And for the record, I don’t have any problem claiming you. I was just doing what I thought you wanted.”
He released her expecting her to have some kind of response, but all Charlisse did was shake her head at him.
“What?” He knew he had to get back to the photoshoot, but had to make sure that she believed him.
“Nothing.” She slowly backed off of the set. “You’re just something else, Marcus Forde, Jr. Get back to your photoshoot. I’ll be over here.”
“Oh, I know.” He winked at her then turned back to the cameraman once she walked away. “Did you get all of that?”
“Of course. It was perfect. The chemistry, the drama, so much personality.”
The cameraman flipped through the previews of the pictures while Marcus resumed his previous pose.
“Good. Send them to me.” He looked over at Charlisse, while she sat down.
He had a plan for those pictures.
Seventeen
“Folic acid, iron, vitamin B.” Charlisse read the container for prenatal vitamins that her doctor had given her during her visit a few days ago.
She took the pills then sat on the stool in her kitchen to think.
How am I going to tell Marc?
She asked herself.
What am I even going to tell him?
She spat back at herself, her thoughts bouncing around like ping-pong. She had wanted to tell him after his photoshoot and interview, but the right time never seemed to present itself. Plus, she still hadn’t made up her mind about what she wanted to do.
“Way to complicate things, Charlisse. You really seem to have a knack for that lately.” She harped on herself.
“How could you do this?”
But she wasn’t just talking about the pregnancy. She was also asking herself how she could have fallen in love with the one person who presented the most complicated situation ever.
According to her ultrasound, she was already seven weeks pregnant. That meant that she and Marcus had gotten pregnant during their first or second time having sex.
She had been too late. She told herself not to get involved, to let him go, and move on, but she had done so too late. Now, she was really trapped by Marcus. No matter her decision, she was going to feel connected to him forever.