by E. L. Todd
“We have to have lilies,” the woman said. “Roses are tacky and overdone. I can’t count the number of weddings I’ve been to this year alone where the roses were overkill.” She had the voice of a fashion girl who flicked her wrist with every word she said. Without looking at her, I knew she was wearing a three hundred dollar pair of shoes and a purse that could pay someone’s monthly mortgage.
I was in the back of the store, blocked in. If I moved, I would be seen over the arrangements of flowers.
“What does John like?” another girl asked. It was Casey, her best friend.
I hated hearing his name. It was like a poison dart just penetrated my skin and impaled me with a deadly substance. My heart palpitated as the memories swept through me. But now I saw them behind my eyes with nothing but regret.
“Oh, John doesn’t care.” I actually imagined her flipping her blonde hair over one shoulder. “He’ll do whatever I say. No questions asked.” She said it like it was something to be proud of, that her man was either too weak or too stupid to question her. I wasn’t sure why I was ever with John to begin with. I preferred a man with a backbone.
I needed to get out of there. Her voice was like nails on a chalkboard. My ears burned with every spoken word. How did John put up with the sound of her voice? I guess it didn’t matter because he probably only listened to her when her back was on a mattress and he was thrusting inside her.
“Would you like to look at our arrangements?” the florist asked.
You’ve got to be kidding me. Now what do I do?
“Yes, let’s do it,” she said.
Okay, I could try to sneak out like a coward or I could just hold my ground. Honestly, I just wanted to flee, and if I could slip out without being noticed, I would. But that didn’t seem possible.
I turned my head sideways and pretended to be particularly interested in a vase of roses since I knew she wouldn’t look at them. It seemed like a safe place to try and obscure my face.
“Most of these are ugly,” she mumbled to Casey. But if I heard it, so did the florists. And that was pretty rude.
The fact she was so abrasive and inconsiderate made me question myself. I could talk shit about her all I wanted, but when it came down to it, John preferred her over me. So, I obviously had worse flaws. But I didn’t know what they were because he never told me.
“These are okay,” she said when she stopped a few feet away from me. “What do you think, Cass?”
I touched the rose gently like I was seriously considering it.
“Is there anything I can help you with, miss?” the florist asked.
Goddammit, leave me alone. “No, just browsing.” I kept my face turned the opposite way.
“Pardon?” she asked, clearly not hearing me since I hadn’t looked at her when I spoke.
“I’m okay,” I said a little louder.
“Like, oh my god.” When my arch nemesis said those words, I knew exactly why. “Casey, guess who’s here?” Her whispers turned to excited taunts.
I’d been found. And there was nothing I could do about it.
“Hey, Aspen.” She said it enthusiastically, like she was absolutely delighted to find me cornered and alone. “Just buying yourself some flowers? To cure the blues?”
“I bet she’s sending them to herself too,” Casey said. “To make it seem like a surprise.”
I’d met a few bitches in my day, but these women were the queens. I turned to them and mustered a fake smile. “I’m buying flowers for my best friend. It’s her birthday.” These bullies couldn’t intimidate me if they tried.
“Oh, how lovely,” Isabella said with a fake smile. Her blonde hair framed her face and her perfect body was highlighted by the skin-tight dress she wore. Any time I saw her, whether it was in the morning or late at night, she was dressed like a celebrity. “At least you have someone to spend time with.”
“Yeah, it’s nice to have a friend that won’t say mean things the second you turn your back, not that you would know what that’s like.”
“Well, you can’t be talking about John since all he did was complain about you when he was cheating on you with me,” Isabella snapped.
“Ooh,” Casey said. “Good one.”
That was cold, ice-cold. I kept a stoic face and pretended like she didn’t slap me in the face with a tennis racket. “And he’ll complain about you to the next mistress he finds when he grows tired of you.”
“Well, I’m not a shitty lay,” Isabella argued. “So he won’t get tired of me.”
Knowing John paraded our personal life to anyone who would listen hurt most of all. And the fact he complained about it, said whatever he said about moments I found personal and beautiful was enough to make me cry. But I kept it together, refusing to give this witch that satisfaction. “Have fun choosing your flowers for the big day. But make notes for the ones you’ll have for your divorce.” I casually walked away, keeping my head held high.
“Don’t let the door hit your fat ass on the way out.”
I stopped before I walked out. “If you fit through it, then I should be fine.” I gave her a smile as rage contorted her face. She opened her mouth to speak but I walked out before giving her the chance to make herself look even more ugly than she already was.
As the assistant director of Refined Oil and Gas, I was tied up a lot. I didn’t take lunch very often because I simply didn’t have the time, and breaks were unheard of. But at least the time went by fast.
I handled all the finances, averted legal processing, and controlled the distribution of oil and energy. I was also in charge of research, and currently, we were working on new methods of clean energy. While oil was extremely profitable, the company wouldn’t survive years down the road when climate changes were unavoidable or we simply ran out of resources. My boss didn’t always agree with me, but I knew it was the best move.
His resistance to research was financial. It cost a lot of money to recruit college students to the research program. We found scientists all over the world, especially India and paid them big bucks to make us big bucks.
My boss was narrow-minded, and investing in something that wouldn’t be cashed in until his lifetime had come and gone was all he cared about. It didn’t matter if he had kids or something else to work toward. He was a very selfish man.
And he was my father.
My intercom went off. “Mr. Lane wants to see you in his office.”
“Thank you, Cindy.” I left my office then walked to his side of the building. His office was as big as an average house. It was covered in floor-to-ceiling windows, and he had a putting golf course inside. Whenever he was on speakerphone, he putted the golf ball around.
After I knocked, he ushered me inside. He was sitting at his desk, his jacket hanging over the back of his chair. Suspenders covered his shoulders to keep his pants up. He’d always been overweight since I could remember. But he never bothered to take care of himself or join a gym, despite my encouragement.
“How’s your day going, Dad?”
He ignored the words entirely. “Why am I just hearing about a two million dollar investment into the research program?”
We already discussed this—countless times. But I kept my cool. “We can’t expect our scientists to discover something without the right equipment. They petitioned to me several times that their lab tools and instruments were worn down and old. They need the best to discover the best.”
He rubbed his temple then his eye as he usually did when he was extremely annoyed or about to scream. “Aspen.” His voice reverberated off the walls and echoed long after he spoke. “I gave you this money for clean energy, but yet, they haven’t discovered anything. They’re just taking their checks and fooling around.”
“I check on them daily, sir. I assure you, they’re working hard. Most of them work overtime without pay.”
He waved away my words. “This is a waste of resources, Aspen.”
“No, it’s not,” I said calmly.
“Oil is where
the money is.”
“And oil won’t always be around.” I realized I was getting irritable. “Sir,” I added.
“That’s not my problem.”
I had this conversation too many times to count. “With all due respect, it is your problem. This company won’t survive the future without adapting and evolving. We must change with the world. Climate change is the biggest problem we face.”
“Climate change is bogus.” He lit a cigar and inhaled it.
Sometimes I wanted to quit. But I knew the company would be mine soon and I wouldn’t have to argue with him anymore. I could add more funding to research and make this company stronger. But while he was still around, all he cared about was money. “Two million dollars is negligible to your net worth.”
“But I’ve already put millions of dollars into this program with no return on my investment.”
“Because these things take time,” I said calmly.
He groaned and rubbed his temple again. He was in a particularly bad mood.
“Dad, they’ll discover something soon, and people will pay any price to have it. Just remember that.” Money was the only language he understood.
“You better hope so.” He opened his drawer then browsed through some papers. Then he tossed a newspaper on his desk. “Have you read it?”
I looked at it but didn’t pick it up.
“I asked you a question, Aspen.” He stared at me with cold and unforgiving eyes. I didn’t see any part of myself inside him. It was like I was adopted, which was what I hoped for sometimes.
He pushed it closer to me. “John and Isabella’s wedding announcement. You should give it a read.”
I kept a stoic face and pretended his words didn’t cut me to the bone.
“Do you realize how embarrassing this is for me?”
My eyes narrowed on his face but I didn’t explode. I didn’t yell all the things I wanted to yell. I kept my cool and acted like the insults meant nothing to me. They were hollow bullets that went right through me.
“You become engaged to John and then he leaves you for someone else? Now he’s marrying her?”
I didn’t have anything to say. It wasn’t my fault. I had no idea John was cheating on me. If I’d known, I wouldn’t have stuck around. I wouldn’t have accepted his marriage proposal.
“To your own cousin?” he demanded. “Now the whole world knows about it and thinks you’re a fool—that I’m a fool.” He grabbed the newspaper and ripped it into pieces, his anger directing his actions. “It’s humiliating.”
My breathing increased but I didn’t show a single emotion.
“Please don’t tell me you’re going to cry.” He gave me a disgusted look. “I told you to never cry in my presence.”
“I’m not crying.” My voice was low so I cleared my throat and spoke up. “I’m not crying.”
“Good. Because it’s annoying. Maybe that’s why John left.”
I averted my gaze and remained strong.
He was quiet for a long time, rubbing his temple like he was fighting off a headache. “I’ve been thinking…a lot about this fiasco.”
I held my breath.
“I really don’t think it’s a good idea for you to be the face of this company. You brought me shame once. You’ll do it again.”
Knives stabbed each lung and I couldn’t breathe. It was a death threat, a promise to ruin everything I worked for. I believed in this company and knew it could change the world. I was the person needed to commandeer this ship into prosperity. How could he take that away? “Sir, I’m more than qualified—”
“It’s not about your qualifications. You do a great job—behind the scenes. I need someone that represents strength. You haven’t even had a boyfriend in over a year. You just work all the time. When the American people look at you, they don’t see a strong leader. They see a weak one who can’t even keep the loyalty of a man. How will you keep the loyalty of a million people?”
His words were cutting me right where it hurt. But I kept my voice steady. “My personal life has nothing to do with my work ethic. And what happened between John and I wasn’t my fault. He was the lying sleazebag, not me.”
“Image is everything, Aspen. When will you realize that?” His voice was cold. “Unless you regain my trust and your image, I can’t give you the company when I retire. You can keep your position indefinitely but I won’t trust the company in your hands. I’m sorry. I wish things were different.”
I didn’t believe that for one second. I wanted to argue and scream. I wanted to knock his desk over then push it out the window. My hands balled into fists and I restrained myself from exploding with profanities and threats. I took a deep breath and stilled those emotions, understanding that arguing would get me nowhere.
“You’re dismissed, Aspen.” He took another puff of his cigar then turned back to his computer.
I stayed there for a moment, thinking of all the things I wanted to say to my father, my worst critic. But every feeling and emotion was irrelevant. I could scream at the top of my lungs but he would never hear me. I’d suspected it for a long time but never accepted it as truth—until now.
My father didn’t care about me—at all.
“I’m so sorry I’m late.” I arrived at the restaurant late because I cried when I got home then fell asleep. I didn’t even have time to shower so I just threw on whatever I could find. I washed my face but I had a feeling nothing could dissolve my tearstains.
“It’s totally fine.” Harper held up her drink. “Some old guy bought me a Mai Tai. So, I was entertained.”
I forced a chuckle. “Who says you can’t have a good time alone.”
“Who said anything about alone?” She shook her glass at me. “This was my best friend until you showed up. And we had a great time.”
“I hope I’m not interrupting anything,” I teased.
“I can juggle both of you.” She put her drink down then gave me all her attention. “Thank you for the flowers. They were beautiful—like always.”
“I hope they jump-started your day.”
“They totally did,” she said. “They’re sitting on my kitchen table right now. I may not have a man, but I have a girl who loves me more than any man ever could.”
“I’ll drink to that.” I held up an invisible glass then clanked it against hers. “Speaking of love…” I grabbed the small bag beside me then handed it to her. “Happy Birthday.”
“You shouldn’t have,” she said. “You already got me flowers.”
“Shut up,” I said with a laugh. “Don’t act like you don’t want it.”
“You’re right,” she said mischievously. She pulled out the tissue paper then found a picture frame. “Awe, this is when we saw David Letterman.”
“It’s a good picture,” I said. “You look incredible.”
She eyed the picture and smiled. “My tan looks amazing.”
I laughed then tapped the bag. “There’s something else.”
She grabbed another picture frame but it was empty. She stared at it in confusion for a moment before she spotted the tickets inside. “You got tickets to see Kevin Hart?”
“Yep.”
She screamed loud enough for everyone in the restaurant to hear. “Oh my god! I love him.”
“I know you do.” We watched his specials on Netflix at least twenty times.
“He’s the most hilarious guy on the planet,” she said. “Like, ever.”
“And we’ll take a picture there and put it in the picture frame.”
“Awe.” Her eyes crinkled in affection. “That was so sweet.”
“I knew you would like it.”
She came around the table and hugged me. “No. I love it.”
I returned her warm embrace, feeling better than I had all day. It was nice to be in the arms of someone who loved me, someone who cared. I had a million problems on my plate but I kept them to myself since it was her birthday. I wasn’t going to bring her down with my baggage.
“This is an Italian place,” I said, trying not to laugh.
“Actually, I had a few Mai Tais. I forgot to mention that…” She snapped her fingers again.
“Well, we can try ordering them anyway.” The thought was amusing. I could picture the waiter’s expression as we made a ridiculous demand. He would regret waiting on our table.
She picked up the menu and scanned the selections. “What’s the most fattening, greasy thing on here?”
I picked up my own. “The lasagna looks deadly on the waistband.”
“Then that’s what I’m getting.” She threw her menu down. “It’s my birthday so I get to be a pig today.”
“So classy,” I teased.
“Like you aren’t going to order lasagna too.” She gave me a pointed look then sipped her Mai Tai.
Actually, I was. “You know me too well.”
“I’m like your boyfriend. I just don’t put out.”
“Unfortunately,” I said with a chuckle.
“Pay for my dinner and I’ll consider it.” She winked at me.
“Flowers, show tickets, and dinner…man, you’re difficult to get into bed.”
“Now you know why I’m single.”
The waiter came to our table and took our order.
“Two of the greasiest slices of lasagna please.” Harper handed the menus to him.
His lips upturned in a smile. “I’ll make sure the cooks prepare it to your specification.”
“You can just pour grease on top if it’s not enough,” I said. “We’ll still love it.”
He chuckled. “You got it, ladies. Any special occasion?”
“It’s my best friend’s birthday,” I said. “And she looks more beautiful than ever before.”
Harper flipped her hair over one shoulder with an expression that clearly said, “Oh stop.”
“In that case, the next round is on me,” he said. “Happy Birthday.”
“Wow…thank you,” Harper said.
The waiter walked away, and Harper leaned forward to stare at his ass like it held the secrets to the universe. “He’s got a nice behind.”