by Tara Brent
He begins, “You know I said I dabble in lots of things. Well, I own a few large companies.”
“Oh! Good for you, Calvin, I knew you could make it. That’s very impressive.”
Our conversation is cut off when the coffee arrives. The waitress places one of the cups on the table. As she pulls her arm away, the table begins to rattle and coffee spills all over the table cloth. The waitress looks around with panic clear in her eyes.
Calvin looks at his cell phone. “Oh man!” He says, also looking worried. “I’ve got an app that alerts me for quakes. Come on let’s get outta here.”
As I stand up I miss a step as the ground trembles under my feet. Calvin's strong arms stop me from falling. My head is filled with car alarms bursting to life. The street fills with a cacophony of sounds, and people come running out of buildings.
My phone rings and I realize it will be my mom.
While I’m checking that all’s well at home, Calvin is walking me with one of his arms over my shoulder. I find it comforting and quite reassuring. I’ve cut out all the noise going on around us because all I can think about is my son now. As I finish the call it feels surreal. I'm seated inside a very luxurious car and I don't remember getting there. I’ve been so concerned about mom and Callum, that I hadn’t noticed exactly what was going on.
“Come on," Calvin says, already pulling out and screeching off at speed. "I know a few short cuts. The main roads will be chaos. How’s your family?”
I nod my head silently, starting to feel the shock of this pending disaster. Sirens wail in the background and I'm sure there's another tremor, but it could be my imagination.
“They’re fine," I say, stopping to take a deep breath. "Callum's with my mom. She says she's listened to an expert being interviewed on TV. They say the quake measured 3.5, so it was only a small one. It’s my son though, he’s worried sick that the earth tremor is going to eat me up.”
“Not on my shift,” Calvin says, flashing me a reassuring smile.
“Is this the right way?” I ask as he meanders through some narrow streets.
“Trust me, you’ll be there much quicker than the usual route.”
He’s right, what normally takes me up to forty minutes he does in twenty. We’re soon pulling up outside my home. Callum comes running out of the house screaming for me.
“Mommy, mommy,” he shouts as he runs up to me. I’m so relieved to have him in my arms that I don’t think about Calvin standing right behind me. With Callum in my arms, I turn to thank him, and I’m suddenly stricken silent from the stunned look on Calvin's face. He knows that Callum is his son!
Nodding my head I feel the tears of relief streaming down my cheeks. We look into each other’s eye and I’m struggling to read him. Is he angry? Pleased? It's impossible to tell.
“I’m... I’m sorry...” I stutter as I turn to run inside.
I'm not sure what I fear the most, another tremor or Calvin's reaction.
“Won’t you come in?” My mom asks him as I rush away.
I'm a little traumatized, not only at what Calvin now knows but also at the thought of a bigger quake.
Mom enters the house behind me, and she’s alone.
“He said he had to get to his brothers,” she tells me.
I know that he now knows that Callum is his son. That was clear to see on his face. I've always seen Calvin in Callum. It became even more obvious the older he got. That’s partly why I never wanted Calvin to see him. Now, it’s too late. All that I have worked hard to keep secret, is now out.
Mom babbles on about the quake but I’m not listening. “I don’t think anything will ever be the same again, mom. That was Callum’s father, and now he knows about my boy.”
The Aftermath
What a fucking day! Earth tremors and probably the biggest tremor of all, I have a son!
Why did she not tell me her child was mine! Another lie? Why? I don’t understand!
I knew as soon as I saw him. He looks a lot like the pictures I have from my childhood. I’ve missed so many years of his growing up because of that lying redhead.
To top it all off, I’m stuck in the ubiquitous traffic on the South Valley Freeway. That is not helping my stress levels at all! I've hardly moved in the last hour. It looks like I’m gonna be here for a while.
I reach over and change the radio station. The last thing I need right now is to listen to San Franciscan's panicking over a minor quake. That's all that's playing on the current news station. I tune into some classical music, which I often listen to when I'm stressed. My car’s surrounded by people on bicycles. Other's are walking, and some are even jumping over the long line of cars parked bumper to bumper.
It’s chaos out there, and right now, I want nothing to do with it. I’m a father. I’m a father! I can’t believe it! Why didn’t she tell me?
When she turned to walk away with him, instead of staying to explain it all to me, I lost it. Her mother looked equally confused, so I don’t think even she even knew I was the father either. Can I ever trust this woman? That beautiful little boy is my son. I have a child to the one woman on all this earth that I love. There has to be some reasonable explanation of why she never told me.
All these years I’ve been a father and I didn’t know it. But how? I’m always so careful. I've used contraceptives for as long as I can remember since being sexually active. The last thing I needed was to end up being tagged to some woman I happened to have sex with. Yeah, I'm not proud of my younger self. Though I continue to be careful now because of gold diggers. There's plenty of them about, trust me. Not that I see Tiffany as a gold digger, on the contrary. Once she knows about my wealth she’s more likely to run. Money! They say it can’t buy you happiness and I’m finally beginning to believe that. Despite all my wealth, the woman I want the most in the whole world is unobtainable. My son doesn’t even know I exist.
I'm sitting and watching the world pass me by, in a dazed dream. All I’m thinking about is that handsome little boy. My son. My heir. I have an heir to my business at last. It’s something Mia’s always going on about. Telling me I need to find a wife and settle down with kids. Well, I have the kid but no wife.
As my mind ponders on my problems, I turn to see the face of a young boy squashed up against the glass on my car door window. He’s pulling grotesque faces at me and I can’t help but laugh. He’s enjoying all this chaos caused by the quake. I can see his mom behind him, attempting to pull him away. She mouths the word sorry to me. Hah! One day my son will be a little mischief too if he isn’t already.
I have a son and I know nothing about him. What does he like? Is he naughty? Can he read? So many questions. Such a lot of catching up to do.
You’re not getting away with this, Tiffany. He’s my son too and you can’t stop me from seeing him.
The car in front moves a few feet and I follow. I have all the time in the world. I’m a father. I won’t lose my temper or complain. It’s time to be mature and show my son that I’m a good role model. I can’t wait to meet him.
Chapter 17
Life Goes On
“I can’t stay at home with you, baby. Grandma will be with you for cuddles,” I try to explain to my clingy son as it's time to go out to work.
“Mommy, what if the earth eats you up?” He cries out.
“It doesn’t happen like that, honey,” I reassure him. “It might shake a little again, but grandma’s here to look after you. Mommy has got to make sure those tiny babies are okay.”
My mom and I look at each other, both with the understanding of motherhood.
"You're my special baby and don’t you ever forget that," I quip in, in case he thinks the babies at work are more important. “I’ll be back as quick as a rabbit,” I say, knowing his favorite soft toy is a big-eared rabbit.
Mom takes him from me and he wraps his arms around her neck. I don’t know how I would manage without my mom. She’s been my rock since dad died.
Reluctantly, I leave
my son. It's harder today for so many reasons. The tremor, the new father. I’d sooner stay at home in case he comes round but my pregnant moms can’t pick or choose their delivery day. Life goes on as normal, for me. Except it’s not normal anymore, is it? I know that in the next few days I’ll have a lot of explaining to do to both Calvin and Callum.
It surprised me that Calvin didn’t contact me last night. In a sense, I wish he had and then all this explaining would be over and done with. Instead, I spent hours until late into the night chatting with Ali. She’s always supportive of me. As with my mom, I don't know what I'd do without my best friend in my life. Of course, our conversation led to Nico. She's smitten with this guy and it sounds as though the feeling is mutual. I like Nico, he seems a sweet guy and I hope he doesn’t break her heart, or he’ll have me to deal with.
For me though, all I can think about is my son and his father. What have I done?
Traffic moves so slow this morning as I make my way to work. I’ve never seen so many rude one-fingered gestures. Then there's the constant honking of horns, as I trundle into work with Dora. It’s not only the motorists who are edgy. I witnessed a woman pedestrian whack a car with her handbag as the jerk nearly ran her over. It’s still chaos out there and I’m so relieved when I pull up in the clinic parking lot. The cool air-conditioned corridors of the birthing center are a great relieving welcome. Well, that's until I hear some poor woman screaming blue murder as she delivers her child into the world. Bah! Earthquakes don’t change anything around here.
The Woman Who Presses my Buttons
Not one phone call from Tiffany with some sort of explanation. You’d have thought she’d at least try, but no, nothing. So, I decide to take things into my own hands. I’m waiting in the parking lot for her to come out of work, standing right outside the door so I don't miss her.
How strange life can be. Here I am, a handsome debonair kind of guy if I say so myself. In reality, I can gain the attention of any woman I desire. What am I doing with my life? Hah! Standing outside a birthing clinic, waiting for the woman who drives me crazy. It’s not only about me and her anymore, but there's also our son. He will come first now in everything I do.
Finally, the glass door opens and out she comes. When she sees me, she doesn’t look at all surprised and walks over to me.
“I’ll explain all I can, Calvin, but you’re partly to blame too, you know,” she tells me. “You can berate me all you like. What you have to realize is that I believed at the time that I’d made the right choice, and I stand by it.”
I say nothing and we automatically walk over to the coffee bar, as if we can read each other’s minds. Again, she takes a table outside and we remain silent until the waitress comes to take our order. Still, she stays quiet so I order for both of us.
“I know he’s mine,” I finally blurt, but it doesn’t come out how I meant it to.
“Yes, Calvin, you are his father and I will not deny him any longer,” she replies.
I smile with sheer delight. I am a father. It’s official. For someone to say those words, it feels really good.
“Look, I could ask you a million questions, like why you didn’t tell me, and when were you going to tell me? But, I’ve got things I haven’t told you as well,” I say.
She raises her eyebrows as she looks back at me with mild surprise, or is it curiosity?
“I was trying to tell you yesterday before everything happened, but now, I’m just going to come straight out with it.”
She looks on, saying nothing, and we suffer one of those pregnant pauses again.
“I’ve been very successful in business,” I begin. “So successful that I’m very wealthy.”
“Are you threatening me?” She spits at me.
“What? No. I was trying to tell you yesterday but stuff happened. I want to come clean and see how we can go forward.”
Tiffany scrapes her chair on the floor as she stands up so fast.
“You are not having my son!” She yells at me.
She’s beautiful when she’s angry but that’s not the point. Is she threatening me with my son? Without meaning to be confrontational, I stand up too.
“You seem to forget one thing, Tiffany,” I say, calmly. “He’s my son too.”
“I knew it. This is exactly what I expected. That you’d try to take him away from me!”
The waitress arrives with a tray in her hands, takes one look at us and quickly turns to go back inside.
“You are the one who has deceived me all these years,” I snap back, stupidly. “Look, let’s calm down and discuss this like mature adults.”
“You think your wealth will buy my son?” She continues to yell and the people at a nearby table turn to look at us.
She’s completely misunderstood me and it's infuriating. I want to hold her and tell her that all will be well, but she does what she always does best. She turns and without saying another word, she marches away. That did not go as planned!
All I wanted to do was be honest with her. Instead, I scared her away with mention of my wealth, It wasn't meant as a threat but that's how she took it. She’s like a frightened doe right now, protecting her fawn and making me out to be the big bad wolf.
I need to go about this differently. I love that woman, but by god does she infuriate me. Tiffany Miller knows how to press all my buttons, that’s for sure.
Chapter 18
Mega Problems
“I can’t stay calm, Ali,” I tell her; my hands shaking with frustration.
It seems that Ali and Nico are the go-betweens for me and Calvin. In a sense, I’m glad not to be dealing with Calvin directly right now. I could say things I don’t mean and I don’t want to hurt him. But it feels as if his wealth is a weapon and he’d use it to take my son away from me. Call it paranoia if you will, but it won't go away. This is the fear that has haunted me for years; that Calvin will take my son away from me.
“Hey, sweetie, you got to be more open or you'll never find a solution,” Ali warns me. “Let's talk about this and get it out in the open.”
“All those years back I wanted to tell him when I found out, but we’d already gone our separate ways. One thing I remember well was how he was always keen on wearing protection in sex. It wasn't because he thought I had a disease, he didn't want kids. I knew he was motivated with his career and I believed that even if I did tell him, he wouldn’t have stuck around. Now I see the truth of his success, it just confirms my fears; he's a career guy. No way would a guy like that have been happy with the restrictions that a wife and kid would have brought him.”
Phew, that feels better for letting it all out.
“You can’t know that for sure though,” Ali says in a calm voice.
She is my sense of reason and always has been. We’ve been through lots together. Although our career paths took us different ways for a while, we’ve always stayed close.
“I have other things on my mind too,” I tell her. “Mom and I have talked about getting out of the city. This tremor has unsettled Callum and with everything that's going on, now seems to be the perfect time to do it.”
“What! No way can you leave. Why not take some time off work. You put your heart and soul into that job, Tiffy. You should all go on vacation.”
“That would be nice,” I agree.
This gets me thinking as I don't remember the last time I took time off for a vacation. Ali's busy texting Nico. I can tell by the twinkle in her eyes and the smile on her face. We’re in our usual positions of lounging on my bed as we work out the problems of the world.
“What about you, anyway? I ask. “How are you and Nico developing?”
“Oh, I adore him, Tiffy. He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. He loves that I get all dirty in my job and still manage to look so darn pretty when we meet. His words, not mine.”
“You know he’s due to go back to Texas sooner or later?” I remind her.
“Don’t you start that too. My pa is harping on
about Nico breaking my heart when he leaves. Though, we are discussing something special,” she says and then goes all quiet.
“Well?” I ask, intrigued and on the edge of my seat waiting. “Spit it out. Oh my god, you’re pregnant!”
Ali rolls about in laughter. My whole world is falling apart and she keeps secrets from me.
“Come on, fess up,” I tease as I prod her. “I tell you all my darkest secrets, it's not fair to keep yours to yourself.”
That's when I give her one of those looks-to-kill types of stare. I'm trying to show her I'm serious.
“I’m waiting?” I try to speed up her answer.
“Nico’s asked me to go with him, to Texas,” she blurts out. “You see, you’re not the only one with life-changing problems. I want to agree, but what with my pa, I can’t walk away.”
“Why can't you take your pa with you?” I ask.
“I thought of that,” she admits. “It’s a possibility but I don’t know for sure. It’s a big thing. I have my job and my life here. I'm not sure what I'm gonna do, so we both have to help each other.”
“Hah! And you told me I shouldn't leave the city," I said, rather smartly. "We need to use our brains, that's what. We’ll do one of those lists with all the pros and cons and see where it gets us.”
“Tomorrow, babes, I’m too tired right now,” she moans sleepily, putting down her phone.
We settle down for the night to rest our weary minds. Both of us want to be with our dream men, and both of us have obstacles in the way.
Spanner in the Works
“I’m devastated to have lost all those years with my son,” I spill to my two brothers, opening my heart to them. “How could she do that to me? She had no right to keep him from me!”
“Calvin, I know I’ve only just become a father,” Ethan says. “But you have to look to the future, for the sake of your son, and not the past.”
“You don’t remember what you and Ethan were like when you finished your studies, Calvin, but I do,” Nico interjects. “That’s why I ended up in Texas, away from all the tension of your business lives, the pair of you. You were just as bad, Ethan.”