by Emily Lowry
The crowd roared.
“And how am I doing tonight?”
An even louder roar.
I was standing backstage by the black curtain, waiting for our cue to go on. DeAndre wore a thousand-yard stare and Leo fiddled with his drumsticks. My stomach lurched and turned, and I felt once more like I was going to throw up. We were about to go on stage and play for what was the biggest night of our lives—
And not one of us was properly prepared. We’d spent so much time building up this moment in our heads, and now that it was here, none of us knew what we were supposed to do.
And the one person who would have known wasn’t here.
The guys looked at me, waiting for me to say something encouraging. Waiting for me to lead. But I couldn’t find the words. How were you supposed to lead when you were terrified? Lucy told me that Mick was in the crowd, and when I peeked through the curtain, I saw that that was true. The old hippy was saddled up next to the bar, drink in hand. Watching and waiting.
If we choked, Lucy would never let us on stage again. And Mick wouldn’t even listen to our Spotify playlist.
DeAndre and Leo both looked as terrified as I felt.
“It’s all good, boys,” I said. “Once we get on stage, it’s about the music. Just focus on the music.” I repeated the words in my head like a mantra. Just focus on the music. Nothing else matters. Play well, you’ll be fine.
“We have a very special guest tonight,” Lucy said. “A couple of stray cats put together a bit of a band, and this’ll be their first time on the stage at Prohibition. Now, you know the rules. You love them, let ‘em hear it. Hate ‘em, well, hopefully you don’t hate ‘em.”
Yeah, hopefully not. Prohibition normally had a great crowd, but if they didn’t love what you were doing, you’d play to the silence of a library.
“Here they are — Trey Carter and Stonewash Sunrise!” Lucy gestured to the curtain and applauded alongside the crowd.
I took a deep breath.
Then I took the stage.
The spotlight was blinding, so I raised my hand to shield my eyes. Leo and DeAndre had to do the same. Leo almost tripped and went crashing into his drum kit, but DeAndre grabbed his arm to steady him.
At least we avoided the first disaster.
I slung my guitar strap over my shoulder and took center stage. The microphone wasn’t quite as tall as I needed it to be, so I struggled to adjust it. My fingers were sweaty and the clip didn’t work quite right. My heart rattled in my chest and my knees felt weak. I smiled weakly at the crowd and continued to struggle with the microphone.
So much of a musician was inspiring confidence. In your band, in the crowd. If you looked like you knew what you were doing, everyone around you would believe in you. If you didn’t look confident, then the audience would turn quicker than you could snap your fingers. And right now, it looked like I didn’t know what I was doing.
Finally, I adjusted the microphone correctly.
Calm down, Trey. Just calm down.
I spoke into the microphone. “I’m Carter Trey and this — Trey Carter — and we’re Sunrise Stonewash. Stonewash Sunrise.” My voice cracked as I stumbled through our introduction. Why hadn’t I even considered how I was going to do this?
I strummed my guitar. Leo hit the drums. DeAndre just stared out at the crowd.
The resulting sound was the furthest thing from an attractive melody you can imagine. I’d seen less wincing at a violin recital for beginners.
This was not going well.
I looked into the crowd and saw nothing but unfriendly, judgmental faces.
I looked to my bandmates.
Both of them were wearing matching, shell-shocked expressions.
We were doomed.
54
Hailey
The crowd winced as Trey’s voice cracked. Someone had replaced the cocky, confident front man I’d fallen for with a frightened wreck of a boy. It was painful to watch. The only thing worse than failing on your own was watching someone you cared about fail in public. Trey’s dream was slipping through the cracks with every silent moment.
Was there anything I could do?
Think, Hailey. Think.
The crowd mumbled. Lucy stood off to the side, her arms crossed. She was gnawing on her lip, and I could see the battle in her eyes. I knew, deep down, she loved Trey, and this was painful for her to watch as well. She was probably debating how long she should let Trey suffer on stage before kicking him off. If she kicked them off stage, they’d never get a chance to play at Prohibition again.
Screw playing — they might not even be allowed inside Prohibition again. Stonewash Sunrise would be a laughingstock. They would blow their chance.
There was only one thing to do.
“Excuse me.” I pushed through the crowd.
55
Trey
My mind was a blank mess. Every lyric I’d ever written had vanished. My throat was closed and I couldn’t speak. The spotlight was so hot I felt that I’d burst into flame at any moment. That would be for the best, I decided. Spontaneous combustion would put me out of my misery.
How had I ever thought I could be somebody? Make a success of myself?
I looked at Lucy.
She shook her head sadly and approached the stage.
It was over.
56
Hailey
Lucy was walking over to the stage.
No.
I wasn’t going to let it happen.
Not without the boys getting a chance to play at least one song.
I was too far from the stage to physically do anything, so I did the only thing I could think of. I cupped my hands around my mouth and shouted.
57
Trey
“I love you, Stonewash Sunrise!”
That voice.
I could recognize it anywhere.
The voice that gave me goosebumps.
The voice that brought a smile to my face.
The voice that snapped me out of my wordless trance.
She was here.
She was here!
She came.
All of my inhibitions washed away. I felt charged, energized. Like I could take on the world.
Like I could rock Prohibition. I could.
And I would.
I winked at Lucy, who was almost on stage, and leaned into the microphone. “Well, if you love us, we should probably play something instead of just standing here, huh?”
The tension broke.
A scattering of laughs from the crowd.
I looked into the audience and found Hailey. Our eyes met, and I felt a surge of confidence.
She was here.
I could do this.
“This one’s called Golden Girl. And it’s for Hailey.”
58
Hailey
My heart stopped. Excuse me, what? Did Trey just say he wrote a song for me?
Trey Carter, who explicitly stated that he NEVER wrote songs about anyone? Especially not girls.
The opening chord spilled through Prohibition. It had the beauty of a summer day with blue skies and an ocean of green grass. I imagined the warmth of the sun on my shoulders, a whisper of a breeze, a refreshing drink in hand. It was as if Trey had bottled summer and turned it into a song.
He stepped to the microphone, his eyes closed. “She’s a fire in the darkest sky, a golden girl with a heart of July.”
I gasped and covered my mouth as a sweet tingling sensation came over my body. My smile was so big it felt like my face would crack. This was incredible. I was mesmerized.
...I was in love.
I loved Trey Carter.
There, I’d admitted it to myself. I loved him. And I was more myself with him than I had ever been with anyone.
From the stage, the song continued, Trey’s eyes boring into mine as he sang.
I was scared of just how hard I fell,
So I let it all unfurl,
Now there’s nothi
ng that I wouldn’t give
To be with her, my golden girl
That golden girl,
Who lit up my entire world.
My heartbeat sped up at the words. I wasn’t his sidekick, I was his muse. I’d helped him step out of his comfort zone and he had helped me step out of mine.
We made each other better.
He helped me realize who I was.
And everything in me knew one thing: I wanted him.
59
Trey
My head was full of heat, my ears ringing with bass notes and screams from the crowd. I played my guitar like I’d never played it before, ’til my fingers felt raw. Every ounce of confidence I had in me, I channeled into that performance, every moment of it dedicated to the golden girl standing in front of me, the one who had captured my whole heart.
Then, seemingly only minutes after it had begun, the show was over. I struck the last chord for Lone Mountain Road, the song that Hailey fixed, and let the sound carry over the crowd. As it died, I took my final step towards the microphone. “We are Stonewash Sunrise, thank you for having us.”
The crowd roared so loud the roof nearly popped off Prohibition.
I smiled the biggest smile of my life.
We had done it. We had played Prohibition and we absolutely slayed it. With the crowd still roaring, Leo and DeAndre came to the front of the stage. We put our arms around each other’s shoulders and took a bow.
Clapping her hands, Lucy climbed the stairs to the stage, booming into her microphone.
“Would you look at that! The stray turns into a star. Give it up, once again, for Stonewash Sunrise!”
The crowd yelled and whistled as Lucy came over to me, grabbed my face, and gave my forehead a sloppy kiss. She grinned at me and moved her microphone away, speaking words intended for my ears only. “Not bad, kid, not bad. But I bet you want a real kiss.”
Before I could answer, Lucy stepped aside.
Hailey stood behind her.
My jaw dropped. She looked tired and pale, tiny in her jeans and t-shirt, but she was as beautiful as ever.
A jumble of emotions hit me at once. I was angry with myself for ever hurting her, bowled over by her beautiful smile, resolute in my vow to keep her safe and protect her forever from here on out, whatever the cost.
There was no one like her. And I was never, ever going to let her go again.
60
Hailey
Trey stood at the opposite end of the stage. He was looking at me with a slight grin, the cocky smirk that both irritated me and gave me endless butterflies, depending on the day. What was going through his mind? Did he realize he’d just played the best concert of my life?
The roars of the crowd faded into the background. Behind Trey, DeAndre and Leo drank in the applause, bowing repeatedly. But Trey? Trey only had eyes for me.
He made his way across the stage until he was standing right in front of me.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered.
“I know,” I smiled up at him. “You wrote that song for me?”
Thinking about the song gave me another shiver of goosebumps.
“That whole concert was for you,” he said. “I thought you were supposed to be on a bus to Denver.”
“How could I miss your first show?” I smiled, unbelievably nervous. Not because of the crowd. But because this was the first time I’d seen Trey in how long? There were so many unsaid words hanging in the air between us.
Trey took a step towards me, his dark eyes gleaming in the spotlights. “I can’t believe you skipped your trip for me.”
“I didn’t skip it for you,” I said, remembering my conversation with Jordyn. “I skipped it for me. I wanted to be here for you. So I was.”
Trey closed the distance between us and took me in his arms. He kissed me, with a whole new level of passion, and in that single kiss, I understood all the promises it held, for us and for our future. All of my fears about Trey, about us, vanished. That kiss said more than words ever could.
61
Trey
We sat on the leather couch backstage, my arm draped loosely around Hailey’s shoulder. All of the tension, all of the nervous energy from earlier, was gone. It had been replaced by relief, jokes, and laughter. It was one of those brief moments in time where everything was perfect.
“Dude, I thought you were freezing,” DeAndre said. “Man, I was watching you, and I was like oh no, he’s losing it. We’re done.”
“Did you see me?” Leo added excitedly. “I almost biffed right into my drum kit. Can you imagine? Crash! Start the show with my head bouncing off the cymbal.”
We laughed.
Our performance rested on the edge of a knife; it could have so easily gone in the other direction. And it would’ve gone sour if it wasn’t for Hailey Danielson. Hailey freaking Danielson.
The black curtain moved and Lucy strutted in. She wore a friendly smile. “Quite a show you put together for a bunch of strays. You cats have some buzz. And I’m not the only one that thinks so.”
The curtain parted again, and in came Mick, the owner of Mountain Cat records.
No way.
I gulped, stood, and shook his hand.
He laughed and glanced at Lucy. “This is why I like to get ‘em while they’re still fresh. They stand and shake hands, not too cool for an old-timer like me.”
“Don’t worry, you’re cooler than Trey will ever be,” Hailey said from the couch.
Mick laughed again, the warm sound filling the room. “Words from the Golden Girl herself. Was awfully nice of you to swing down and save the day.”
“It was,” I agreed. I thought back to my first meeting with Hailey and how stupid I’d been. I stereotyped her as the rich cheerleader and tried to ignore her. But, as I was finding out, Hailey Danielson was not the type of person who could be ignored. She wasn’t part of the band, but she was the heart of our songs. I used to think of the words “golden girl” as an insult — how could I have ever thought that?
She was my golden girl.
“I think you boys have something here,” Mick said. “How would you feel about cutting an album together?”
Leo swore.
DeAndre leaped to his feet and cheered.
I grinned. It was happening. After all of these years, it was finally happening. “You think your receptionist will let me through the door?”
Mick shrugged. “Only one way to find out. I’m out of town this weekend. But the weekend after next. Drop on by and we’ll do up some paperwork. Start thinking about getting you boys in a studio. A real studio.”
“Awesome,” I said, trying to keep my voice calm. My entire body was buzzing. We said goodbye to Mick and Lucy, then I collapsed on the couch. My head spun. I couldn’t believe it. Everything was starting to happen, the wheels were in motion. Everything I’d worked so hard for. It was all in my grasp. And I owed it to the rich cheerleader.
Hailey rested her head on my chest. “Congrats,” she said softly.
I looked down at her. “What about your cheer competition, Hails?”
She paused for a moment. “I spoke to Coach Garcia and asked if I could drive up there in the morning. She wasn’t happy, but I think it’ll be ok.”
“I can’t believe you came. I don’t think I can thank you enough for saving tonight.”
“I know how important it was to you. I know how much you love your music.”
I ran my fingers through her hair. “I only love it half as much as I love you.”
She jolted, looking up into my eyes. “Did Trey Carter just—”
“You heard me. I love you, Hailey Danielson. I love you for every single piece of who you are.”
A warm smile spread across her face. “I love you, too.”
She loved me.
My heart was full.
I pulled her to me, electricity humming through my entire body as my lips met hers.
The kiss was explosive, like fireworks on the fourth of July.
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62
Hailey
My Wuthering Heights costume was distinctly uncomfortable. It was a ridiculously stiff, starchy dress, and whenever I spun, there was a ninety-nine percent chance that I’d knock a pencil or a phone off a desk. Despite the awkward dress, I did my best to navigate my way through the opening monologue of our Wuthering Heights project. The class watched me in vague disinterest. I was the fourth act of the day, and nobody really cared at this point.
When I was finished reading, I snapped my fingers three times.
The door to class swung open, and in marched Trey Carter, carrying his guitar and wearing a perfect period piece costume. He was a perfect Heathcliff — dark, broody, and handsome as could be. I grinned at my boyfriend, happy to have him by my side.
Already, people were grabbing for their phones, no doubt hoping to capture the moment for Click. But neither of us cared. Yes, Click could cause a world of trouble and pain, but strangely, in some ways, we owed our whole relationship and Trey’s career to that stupid app.
And I didn’t care what it thought of me anymore, how it judged me. Click could put me on blast all it wanted, and I would still be proud of who I actually was. Not who Evermore thought I was.
Yes, I was Trey Carter’s girlfriend. But I was so much more than anybody’s girlfriend. The morning after Trey’s Prohibition show, he had driven me to Denver and sat in the audience as I led my squad to a second-place finish in May Madness — higher than we had expected to place, and earning me back the respect of my teammates.
In that winning moment, standing there on the podium to receive my medal, it was clearer than ever to me that I could be exactly who I wanted to be. I was a straight-A student and a good friend and daughter, who also loved dancing in underground clubs and singing backing vocals in my boyfriend’s band. I stood up to people who were acting unfairly and putting others down.