by Emily N. Kay
Girls can be brutal. Trust me, I had a first-hand experience in middle school from my old school. Girls hated me just because boys would give me an uncomfortable level of attention. Which I never asked for. So maybe now that I’m in high school, I’m internally programmed to keep a distance from girls. And boys, for that matter.
Zoe came into my life late freshman year. She just moved from D. C., and we were in the same PE class. We got paired up for physical evaluation. She was so quiet and so was I. But once we got through the mutual struggle of sit-ups and rope climbing together, we started talking, and then we never shut up. She’s new and she needed a friend, and we simply clicked.
Zoe said that I’m impossible to approach, and that if it’s not for the PE class, she’d stay the hell away from me. She claimed that I’m too pretty, too perfect, which makes me hella intimidating. And maybe she’s right… Maybe that’s why I stop trying to make new friends. It’s exhausting having to convince people you’re not what they think you are. I’d rather stick to those who already know me.
I don’t mind not having a lot of friends. Not when I already have Zoe. And Leo. They’ve been together since sophomore year. And because these two are inseparable, Leo and I have slowly and awkwardly become best friends as well, despite our history… Long story short, Leo was my first kiss. It was a long time ago. It happened at a house party. And it led to nothing.
As I’m striding along the hallway, I can see people staring. Especially from the new faces. Most of them freshmen. Those who’ve never seen me.
I am used to how people look at me by now. I do know that I’m beautiful. People have been telling me that all my life. It’s hard not to notice the certain looks I get. It used to make me so uncomfortable––all the stares, especially from dudes on the street. But now that I’m an escort, I’m kind of desensitized. Sometimes I even feel as if the reason I want to be an escort is because it serves as a therapy to me. Being an escort makes me feel like it’s okay to be looked that way, to be wanted.
I climb up the stairs to get to the fifth floor to my homeroom. Only on the third floor and I’m already running out of breath. I seriously need to work out more.
I am too focused on catching my breath that I don’t even look up from the stairs when someone is rushing to go down at the same time. So when I step off of the final step, the person crashes into me so hard that I almost fall back have I not grabbed the hand rail in time.
“Shit!” I cry, my heart dropping to my feet.
A guy’s hand is reaching out to grab my wrist, pulling me to safety on the floor.
“Are you all right?” The guy looks at me from head to toe, his deep blue eyes widening.
I can’t form a word, still in shock of just escaping death.
He narrows his eyes, staring me down. “Do you want me to take you to the nurse or something?”
“Um,” I utter, finally able to speak. “No. I’m… I’m fine. I’m sorry.”
Wait, why did I say sorry to him? It’s obviously his fault.
In my confused state, I study the guy in front of me. He is clearly not a student, judging from the way he looks and dresses––a bit of facial hair, blue shirt and a black tie. I would say he is in his late twenties. He’s quite tall. And he definitely works out, I note.
“It’s not your fault, but okay…” he says carefully, half smiling. Just then, his gaze slowly glide from my face… until it stops on my chest.
I follow his stare down. And to my horror, the top button of my blouse is undone, revealing my cleavage.
I let out a small gasp as I quickly button up my shirt, hiding my face behind a curtain of my hair. A blush starts to creep up my neck.
His gaze moves back to my face, his expression blank. “Well, enough for the show,” he finally says. “I’m actually in a hurry. So…” he drags, still watching me curiously.
Excuse me, is that a grin I see?
My mouth hangs open. And before I could call him off for being rude, he flashes me a tiny smile before rushing off to God knows where.
Unbelievable. He didn’t even have the curtesy to say sorry.
A pervert––I decide––that’s what he is. But what is a pervert doing at my school anyway?
I frown all the way to my homeroom. This is not a good start to my first day…
My frown turns to a smile the minute I spot a girl with shoulder-length, blonde hair sitting alone in the front row, a phone in her hand.
I drop myself beside her. “Hey.”
She gasps. “My baby is here!” Zoe wraps her arms around me in a quick hug. “So…” she starts, looking at me mischievously. “Tell me everything. What happened last night?”
“Oh,” I say, realizing I haven’t told her about my latest client.
I haven’t told anyone, obviously. No one knows I’m an escort except for Zoe, Leo, and Lacey––and I intend to keep it that way.
I shrug. “There’s nothing, really. He just wanted to cuddle and watch Breaking Bad on Netflix.”
Zoe stares at me, then she cracks up when she sees that I’m serious. “What kind of Netflix and Chill was that? And he didn’t want to do anything else with you? That’s a little hard to believe.”
He wished. “No,” I answer. “He gave me a huge tip too. You know, just for chilling in a five-star hotel and watching Netflix.” I grin as I take in Zoe’s eye roll. “And you know what, Breaking Bad is dope. I’ve watched like… three episodes with him, and now I’m going to watch the whole thing tonight.”
Zoe just looks at me with the you-are-unbelievable face. “You really know how to make this thing sound so much more fun and easy than it actually is.”
Here we go again. “I know, I know. You hate that I’m doing this, and you’re going to ask me why I do it again, and I’m going to give you the same answer. It’s fun! And do I even need to remind you how much I got?”
“You haven’t even been doing it for that long. You might have been lucky with your clients so far. But what happens when there are… rapists or sadists?” she whispers the last part.
I pause. This kind of scenario has crossed my mind before, but I’ve always decided to brush it off. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be able to continue. “Then… let’s just hope I continue to get lucky.” I shrug.
Zoe grunts. People start filing up in the class, so she lowers her voice. “Is it about sex? Do you want sex? I won’t judge if you do. I can set you up with someone nice if you want…”
“What? No! You know I would never have sex with them even if I could. Why would you even think that!”
“I just want you to know that it’s natural. You don’t need to be ashamed––”
“Ew, stop!” I cut her off before she could say more.
Just thinking about losing my virginity to a stranger, and a paying one at that, gives me goosebumps. I’m an escort, not a prostitute––I remind myself of that every day.
I used to tell Zoe that the furthest I could do for a client is probably third base. Still, I doubt that I would. Just the thought is grossing me out.
Zoe keeps giggling and gives me sideway glances.
“Shut up!” I tell her through gritted teeth. “I don’t want sex, if that’s what you’re wondering.”
“Whatever.” She shrugs, still grinning. “But if you happen to…”
I slap her arm. “If you don’t stop I’ll tell Leo you know his Facebook password.”
She stops short, her eyes bulging. “Bitch.”
I give her my most devilish grin. “Love you too.”
Chapter 4
The day drags on and on. But I’m finally in my last period––AP Biology. This is the only class that I have without Zoe, and I want to get it over with now.
I look around the room to see if there are any familiar people I could stick with, to make this class a little less miserable. There’s none.
There are a group of five girls talking and laughing at the back, a quiet guy with his face buried in his textbook in the middl
e, and a few other people I don’t recognize. No one seems to pay much attention to me, except for the occasional glances from some of the girls who I recognize are from some of my classes last year.
Maybe they are debating whether they should invite the unapproachable, yet lonely girl who is sitting in the corner of the room to join them.
I take out my textbook and flip through it mindlessly, making it seem like I’m busy with something.
The class is almost filled now, leaving only two tables empty––the one in front of me and the one on my left. I don’t want to take it personally, but well, my self-esteem is plummeting.
I look at the person behind me. It’s Jacob Weiler, the class president. We never talk personally, but he seems like a super friendly guy. Popular, and not a douche kind of popular. Everyone loves him. I always find him saying hello and nodding to people in the hallway.
This is good. I can finally start making some new friends apart from Zoe and Leo in this class. And Jacob seems like a good one to start with.
When Jacob notices me staring at him, I give him the friendliest smile I could muster. And as I’m about to strike a conversation, he quickly averts his eyes to look down at his hands.
This––literally feels like a slap to my face. Did he just ignore me? Is this what I get when I try to make a friend?
I quickly turn my head back, staring blankly ahead. If my self-esteem was low before, now it’s seriously sinking. The guy who is supposed to be the nicest, the friendliest at this school just shut me out. The class president just gave me the cold shoulder! Either there is seriously something wrong with me or I must have done something to upset him. But I’ve never even talked to the guy!
Questions and paranoia thoughts start flooding through my head when Mr. Douglass finally shows up. He hands us the class syllabus, and then he goes on about what he is expected of us. Blah blah blah. And did I hear something about a group project? Ugh, now I officially hate this class.
“I want you to pick a partner for the assignment that you’ll be doing for the whole semester.” I suddenly feel the wave of anxiety rushing over me. A partner? Who the hell is going to be mine? Even Jacob Weiler, the forsaken class president doesn’t want to be my friend!
“Can we have one group with three people?” Of course, a girl from the five-girl-group speaks up.
Mr. Douglass sighs and says dismissively, “Fine.” The five girls squeal like they have won a lottery. I keep myself from rolling my eyes.
I need a partner. I look around, and everybody seems to already have theirs. I’m sitting alone, with two empty tables around me, with no one to partner up with. The worst thing I want right now is for Mr. Douglass to notice me sitting alone helplessly, and for him to call me out for the class to know that I’m utterly alone, that no one wants to work with me.
I need to do something. And quick. I gather up my courage and turn back to face Jacob. Maybe I was in my own head. Maybe he doesn’t hate me. I have to try again. “Do you want to partner up with me?” I blurt out.
His eyes go wild and he looks to his left––to a short-haired girl who is sitting next to him. I haven’t seen her around before. She’s probably new. “I––I’ve got a partner. Sorry,” he stumbles, avoiding my gaze.
The girl is quiet. She says nothing, just staring at me.
My heart drops. “Oh… it’s fine.” I force out a quick smile before I turn back.
Then I hear the girl saying to Jacob––loudly, “She’s really pretty. What’s her name?”
Jacob shushes her. But then he says, voice hushed, “Alice Anderson.”
Before I can react to any of that, a student suddenly walks in the front door. Leo Ward. Relief washes over me. My friend is here, and everything is going to be fine!
Leo… you have no idea how much I love you right now.
“Sorry I’m late,” Leo says as he gives Mr. Douglass the blue slip.
“Sprained ankle?” Mr. Douglass looks down at Leo’s left ankle, which is wrapped in a white bandage.
“Yep. Basketball practice.”
“All right, go take a seat.”
Leo scans the room and his gaze lands on me. He gives me a nod and a smile. I smile back widely. He limply walks to take a seat next to me.
“Hey,” he says, grimacing with pain as he lowers himself. His dark complexion shines with dots of sweats on his temples.
“You’re in this class!”
“That happy?” He chuckles and looks at me like I’m crazy.
“You have no idea.” I can’t stop smiling.
Mr. Douglass continues with his expectations and how none of his students last year had reached them.
“You’re my partner now,” I tell him.
He pretends to look around. “Obviously. I’m the only one left.”
This class is not that bad after all.
“No way!” Zoe exclaims. “Babe, tell me she’s making this up.”
“Don’t ask me. I didn’t see anything.”
“He was late to class, so he didn’t witness the way Jacob Weiler treated me,” I explain, almost spitting out Jacob’s name.
The three of us are hanging out at Starbucks near our school. It’s usually a happy place for me. But right now, even a pumpkin spiced latte can’t make me happy. The topic of Jacob makes me anxious all over again. I don’t like to admit it, but I care what people think of me. I like to be liked. I mean, who doesn’t?
“I don’t know, Alice. Jacob is always so nice to me. To everyone. That’s just how he is––a super nice guy. You must have done something seriously wrong for him to treat you that way,” says Zoe.
Leo nods in agreement. “Jacob is cool. The guys love him,” he says, referring to guys in his basketball team.
Does that mean he is nice to everyone but me?
“I don’t want to talk about him anymore. Let’s talk about something else,” I say.
Zoe completely ignores my suggestion. “What do you think, babe? You’re a guy. From your perspective, why would Jacob Weiler––the nicest guy in school, shrug off Alice Anderson––the prettiest girl in school…” Zoe trails off with a grin.
I roll my eyes. “Stop saying that.”
Any chance she gets, Zoe mentions how I’m the prettiest girl, and that I should get the handsomest boyfriend. When I told her that she’s being ridiculous, she argued back that she’s not saying it just because I’m her best friend, but because it’s the truth.
“Hmm, let’s see,” Leo says in a thoughtful expression, playing along. “It could be possible that Jacob Weiler is a shy one… and so he is afraid to talk to our Alice… because he’s into her.” He grins.
I snort at how stupid that sounds. I’m sure I’m not even Jacob’s type. A guy like him is supposed to be into smart and outgoing girls. Like those in the debate team or the student committee. In fact, he used to date Ebony Watson, a girl from the choir group. The only girl he’s dated, apparently.
Jacob is not into me… It’s not possible. Zoe and Leo just like to pair me up with someone, or anyone for that matter. It’s their favorite past time hobby.
Zoe suddenly claps her hands. “Then I say… we should help him get what he wants.” She flashes a playful grin.
“Yeah, I’m down,” Leo agrees. “I can ask him to switch partners.”
“That’s a really great idea!” Zoe squeals, putting a hand on her chest.
I gape at them. “Okay, everyone listen. First of all––I’m not the prettiest in school. Second––Jacob is so not into me, okay? He ignored me today. And third––I don’t appreciate you guys talking like I’m not even here!”
“Sorry.” Zoe shrugs, not looking very sorry at all.
And then the two of them just cracks up and go on tickling each other, really forgetting that I’m here.
I clear my throat. “Hey, I just realize,” I say, attempting to gain their attention back. “It’s almost you guys’ two-year anniversary. What are you two doing to celebrate?”
> They look at each other and smile.
Zoe scrunches up her nose. “I don’t know. Anniversaries are so overrated. Every day with you is what matters, right, babe?” She nudges Leo with her shoulder.
“Aw, come here.” Leo pulls Zoe in his arms, squeezing her tight.
I almost gag. Being the constant third wheel, I get jealous of them sometimes. But I’m happy that they found each other. I cannot think of one couple who are more suited for each other than these two.
Leo and Zoe got together when they were in music class together. My friendship with Zoe almost did not survive then. I didn’t welcome Leo with open arms. You know, considering that he stole my first goddamn kiss. But then he apologized to me a thousand times, claiming that he’s drunk and whatnot. The truth is I wasn’t mad about the kiss. I was more mad at him for coming between me and Zoe. When Leo started hanging around, it was like everything was thrown off balance. It had always been me and Zoe against the world. So when there was Leo in the mix, I didn’t like that.
But Leo is Leo. He has this natural charm that can win over anyone. My mom even said she wishes Leo would date me… Talk about gross.
Anyway, we naturally became closer. The three of us. Now we’re the famous trio, where I’m the ultimate third wheel…
Chapter 5
My elective for this semester is Creative Writing. I’m taking this class because Mrs. Lucas is teaching it. She taught me English Literature last year, and I loved her. Everyone loves Mrs. Lucas for she’s known to be an easy-grader. But I just love how passionate she is about teaching.
Besides, writing seems fun. I’ve gotten good grades for my old papers, though I don’t know if I actually did great or is it because Mrs. Lucas was the one grading. So I’ve decided that I will ask her for feedbacks in this class.
Zoe and I take our seats in the middle of the room. A few moments later, someone walks in through the front door.
And that someone––is not Mrs. Lucas.
In fact, it is the guy from yesterday. The pervert…