What a prick.
Sounds like something I’d do.
“Maybe,” I say with a shrug. Tara wouldn’t be bad. I bet she’d put out. Dating a dude who was a year older than her starting our sophomore year ensures the girl has had sex plenty of times. She wouldn’t tease me. Wouldn’t fuck with my head either.
Or my heart.
“She likes you. I’ve heard her say it myself.”
“Yeah, but she had her chance with me last year. Maybe I should try chasing after someone new. You know I can tap pretty much whoever I want,” I say with a cheesy grin.
Brenden laughs. So does Cory. I start laughing too. It’s easier to laugh about it than mope. I’m sick of moping.
Fuck girls who only want to break our hearts. I’d rather set up a barbed-wire cage around it and protect myself. Anyone who gets near it, gets hurt. Rather than the other way around.
“You’re no Jackson,” Brenden says once the laughter dies. “Now he’s the one who can get whoever he wants.”
“Whatever,” I say, making a dismissive noise, though I know what Brenden is saying is true. I’ve been top dog in our class with the ladies since freshman year. But Jackson snuck up on me, and now we’re neck and neck.
“Hey, did you hear Jake Callahan got into a fight Friday night?” Cory suddenly asks.
I glance over at him, marveling for about the thousandth time over how skinny and long his neck is. When he’s got his football helmet on, he’s a sight to see. “Where at?”
“Sorrento’s house. He broke the QB from Mariposa Valley’s nose.” Cory shakes his head. “Once that happened, it was on. It was on a lot of people’s stories. Everyone started fighting until Sorrento himself broke it up. Someone got a few good licks in on Callahan, though. I hear he looks a little tore up.”
The satisfaction at someone beating Jake’s smug face in leaves me feeling mellow. Or maybe that was the blunt. Could’ve been the beer.
I don’t know what it was, but all three are making me feel pretty fine right about now.
“What a dumb fucker,” I mutter under my breath as I grab my phone, checking it for notifications.
Lo and behold, I have one from Tara Perkins. I guess her ears were burning.
I open up Snap to see she sent me a heavily filtered photo of her, her tits on display in a snug cropped tank top. Swear to God, I can see her nipples poking the fabric.
Of course, the caption is: Streak?
I immediately snap a selfie and reply.
Sure. I’ll start a streak with you.
She sends me back a photo of just…her tits. They’re covered, but it’s still a nice view. One I wouldn’t mind checking out up close and personal.
I send her back another selfie, and the look on my face says it all. I like what she’s showing me.
I wouldn’t mind more of it.
Nice view, is my caption.
Her response is a photo of her smiling with the caption: Feeling flirty!
Okay. This is the path I’m meant to take. Flirting with Tara. Or whoever else at school catches my interest. No girls from another school. That’s just flat-out stupid. Hanging with my friends, drinking beer and smoking a blunt on a Sunday night. Getting prepped for the school week is what I call our little get together. Like Brenden said, it’s our senior year.
Fuck it.
Party next weekend at Jackson’s uncle’s house. Maybe we should try to turn it into a fuck fest.
I’d be down. I’m sure my friends would too.
“I’d love to beat the shit out of Jake Callahan,” I suddenly tell them, and they all agree with a chorus of fuck yeahs. “Someone record me?” I hold out my phone.
Brenden snatches it up with a smile. “Go stand over there.” He waves his hand toward the pool.
I stand in the same spot Ava did Friday night, hating how my heart feels uncomfortably heavy when I think about her. Imagining her here. I don’t want to feel like this anymore.
I don’t want to be so hung up on a girl who could give a damn about me. I’m over it.
Over her.
Yeah right.
“Ready?” Brenden asks as he holds my phone up, poised to record me.
Nodding, I put my hands on my hips, grateful for the beer. I’ve got major liquid courage going on. All the other guys gather behind Brenden, ready to watch me launch into action, and when Brenden counts down, pointing his finger at me and indicating it’s showtime, I let a slow smile spread across my face.
“Heard a story that the mythical Jake Callahan got into a fight this weekend. And that he broke a dude’s nose.” Laughter from my audience fuels me. “Lucky shot there, Callahan. You’re usually covered in bubble wrap thanks to your pops, so no one can touch the precious prince.” I point my finger at the camera. “Well, fuck that. I’d love to see you come for me. I’d smash you into a pulp. I’d fucking destroy you. Nothing would give me greater satisfaction.”
The smile I’m sporting turns into a full-blown grin as my friends cheer and holler their encouragement. They want to witness me destroy Jake as well.
Wonder what Ava will think about all this?
Fourteen
Ava
“I hear there’s a party tonight,” Ellie says, her gaze glued on her phone.
It’s Saturday morning, and we’re in my room. Still lounging in my bed. The both of us on our phones, checking our notifications, our feeds, checking out other people’s lives.
In other words, it’s a typical weekend morning.
I had to cheer at an away game last night—we won—and Ellie drove to the game and sat with some of our friends. I was able to go home with her since Mom signed me out with the cheer coach. Ellie and I gossiped the entire drive home, going over who’s cute, who’s not. Who’s a bitch, who’s not. Who’s an asshole, who’s not. How much I hate Cami, the cheer captain and my brother’s bitchy ex-girlfriend. How hard we work at practice three days a week, yet she yells at us all the time.
It sucks. She sucks. And to think Jake almost got back together with her…
But anyway, it was nice to have some one-on-one time with my friend and have her spend the night. Once we got back to my place, we gorged ourselves on unhealthy snacks, watched and giggled over Tik Tok videos, and we talked about boys.
Not once did I mention Eli Bennett’s name. Though I thought about him. I’m thinking about him right now.
It’s almost as if he’s never far from my mind.
It’s also frustrating. Like trying to kick a bad drug habit and having a difficult time because it’s just so damn addicting, you never want to give it up.
That’s Eli. I think I might be addicted to him.
It’s past eleven, practically noon, and I’m pretty sure my parents are already gone, the both of them taking Beck to his youth league football game for the afternoon. I have no idea where Jake is.
Nor do I care. He’s probably with one of his bros. Or sulking over some girl. As long as it’s not Cami, I’m cool with it. Though I think he’s sulking over Hannah, a girl I would’ve never paired him with.
What in the world does she see in him?
“Where’s the party at?” I finally ask Ellie as I scroll through Instagram.
“I guess at a cabin, one of Jackson Rivers’ relatives owns? Not sure who. Not sure if it matters, but I know the cabin is over by the old Johnson Resort,” Ellie explains.
Jackson Rivers. He goes to school with Eli. He’s on the football team as well. “Won’t we be crashing a party like that?”
Meaning a party put together by people from our biggest rival school? Sounds like a fight waiting to happen.
“I heard they were inviting everyone. Like, it doesn’t matter where you go, they want you to show. It’s going to be a huge bash,” Ellie explains.
Huh. If Jackson’s having the party, I can almost guarantee Eli will be there. His entire crew will most likely be there, and do I really want to deal with that?
Yes. Yes, you do.
&n
bsp; “He’s hit me up before you know,” Ellie says nonchalantly, making me pause in my scrolling.
“Who has?” I ask carefully, afraid she’ll say Eli.
Though neither of us have even brought him up in conversation, so I mentally tell myself to calm down.
“Jackson Rivers! Oh my God, he’s soooo sexy,” Ellie says, a dreamy look in her eyes, and her hand resting against her chest.
“Wait a minute, I had no idea you have such a huge crush on Jackson Rivers.” I shove her shoulder, making her laugh. “But sexy? Seriously? We’re sixteen, El! No one’s sexy.”
“Please. Jackson is sex personified. Have you heard him sing? He writes his own lyrics!” Ellie announces excitedly.
Some boy playing his guitar and crooning his homemade lyrics of a song written just for me has little to no appeal. It’s almost—too romantic, if there’s such a thing. If a boy stared at me while he sang his words of love, I’d probably squirm and feel super uncomfortable.
Clearly, I have no heart. That must be my problem.
“I’m sure Jackson will put on a performance for all the ladies tonight,” I tell her, hesitating for a moment before I continue on, “But I don’t think I want to go.”
“What?” Ellie sets her phone down in her lap, gaping at me. “Are you serious right now? Why don’t you want to go?”
“Eh.” I shrug. I can’t tell her I don’t want to run into Eli because she doesn’t know what happened between us, and I don’t plan on ever telling her either. I’m still confused by everything myself. I ditched him last Friday night and ignored his texts when I got home. Everything he said to me in those texts was super possessive yet somehow also…sweet.
But I said nothing. I couldn’t come up with a proper response. The longer I took to respond, the harder it got to actually do it, you know? Now it’s been a week and I haven’t heard from him, and it’s all my fault.
I can’t blame him for letting me go. I deserve it. I rejected him. No one likes to be rejected.
“Eh? That’s your answer?” Ellie sounds incredulous. “Come on, it’ll be fun. We’ll see different people, and that might be what we need, you know? I’m tired of looking at the same boys, day in and day out. We need some new blood. Plus, this party might get you out of your bad mood.” She hesitates, for a moment, before she tries to entice me with, “You never know. Wyatt might show up.”
She thinks my so-called bad mood is Wyatt-induced. I’ve decided not to argue with her. It’s easier to let her believe I’m sad over not wearing Wyatt’s jersey a week ago—brought on by me, not Wyatt. He didn’t even bother asking this week, which was a relief. He’s already moved on to another girl on the cheer team. Lindsey. She’s smart, she’s pretty, she’s nice. She’s the perfect match for Wyatt.
“You talk about how we need some new blood and then you mention Wyatt all in the same breath,” I say with a slight shake of my head. “And the Wyatt thing? That will never work.”
“You don’t know for sure,” Ellie starts, but I cut her off with a stern look.
“Oh, I know. Jake will make it impossible.” I am lying through my teeth. If I really wanted to be with Wyatt, nothing would stand in my way.
“I can’t believe you’d let your brother control you that much,” Ellie mutters, picking up her phone once more. “And you’re going to that party. Hopefully Jake won’t go, or his grumpy ass will ruin everything.”
Isn’t that the truth?
I open Snapchat and start going through everyone’s stories. I’m on such a roll, I don’t know who’s story I’m looking at next until it’s there. He’s there. Right in front of my face.
Eli.
I saw the story he made at his house last Sunday night, taunting my brother incessantly and basically baiting him to fight. I could practically feel his thinly veiled rage through the phone screen, he was so heated. Couldn’t help but wonder if some of that anger was aimed straight at me.
But I was probably overthinking it. I’m just a blip in his memory now.
I watch his newest story, another taunting speech for my brother. For our entire football team. He’s trash-talking them, his friends shouting in agreement with everything he says. I know girls swoon over Jackson, but they also swoon over Eli. And he has all the boys under his spell too. I can see why.
Plus, he can talk such a good game.
It’s as if he weaves his words with magic. I know it sounds silly, but he’s just so—persuasive. Even when I’m telling myself no, I can’t say yes to anything he says, I somehow find myself agreeing with his suggestions. Most of the time.
This is why I’m staying away from him. He makes me weak.
“Since I’m still getting no response from you, I’m gonna harass your ass every single night in my stories, Callahan.” Eli walks closer to the camera, so his face fills the entire screen, his hazel eyes seeming to shoot angry lasers, directly at me. “You think you can ignore me? No fucking way. I’m right here, always in your face. In your head. Fucking with it. Fucking with you. Haunting your dreams at night, baby. I know I am.” He backs away, slowly shaking his head as he laughs. “Just admit it. You can’t stop thinking about me. I’m your worst fucking nightmare come to life.”
I blink at the screen, absorbing his words, re-watching his story without thought.
You think you can ignore me?
I’m right here, always in your face.
In your head.
Fucking with you.
Haunting your dreams at night, baby.
I know I am.
You can’t stop thinking about me.
“Party tomorrow night by the lake. At one of those cabins that were part of the old Johnson’s Resort.” He points at the screen again. “Starts at nine. Hope to see you there, Callahan.”
The story ends. Another starts up, but I’m not watching it. I can hear laughter, just a clip of it, before it starts all over again. The story is on repeat, and it’s annoying. But I don’t care.
He’s talking to me.
Eli’s talking to me.
He’s not calling out my brother and asking him to go to that party. He wants me there.
Me.
“God, Eli Bennett has the biggest mouth ever,” Ellie mutters. “Why do you even watch his stories?”
“I don’t know,” I say irritably. Yikes, I sound defensive. Clearing my throat, I continue, “I guess I just…like to know who’s threatening my brother and our family on a daily basis.”
“He’s a creep. All talk, no action,” Ellie says.
He’s shown me plenty of action.
“I don’t know why he doesn’t get in trouble at school. If Jake did that, your dad would have his ass,” Ellie continues.
She’s right. Dad wouldn’t let him get away with shit-talking on social media. But somehow, Eli can shit-talk all he wants and no one does anything about it. I know Jake ignores him for the most part. I should too.
But that last story, he’s talking to me. I know he is. Everyone’s going to expect Jake to show up at this party tonight in the hopes they get in a fight. No way would Jake risk it. He’s not stupid. This is his senior year, and he wants to get into a good college. He’s not going to mess it up by getting into a fist fight with the one guy who threatens him every single day.
Though my brother had no problem punching the quarterback from another school right in the nose and breaking it. Maybe he would show up and beat Eli’s ass.
They’re both ridiculous—Eli and my brother. Violence is not the answer. Shit-talking isn’t either.
But confronting the boy who’s sending you secret messages via Snapchat stories sounds like a plan. Meaning I’ve basically dropped down to their level.
“I’ll go to the party,” I tell Ellie.
Her eyes widen in surprise as she turns to look at me. “Oh my God, really? This is such great news! What made you change your mind?”
Eli’s demand that I show up, is what I want to tell her.
“I don’t know. It
might be fun. And you’re right. It’s something different to do.” I offer a little shrug.
My actual answer is lame, but it doesn’t matter. My friend is just happy I’m agreeing to go.
“Can I stay here for the rest of the day and get ready with you? I’ll tell my mom I’m spending the night again if that’s okay,” she says as she brings up her text messages and starts typing. “Will you let me borrow something to wear?”
“Of course,” I tell her, chewing on my lower lip as I think about tonight. “How late do you think the party will go?”
“I don’t know. What’s your curfew again?”
My parents are kind of strict about that because I’m their baby girl. “Like…midnight at the absolute latest, and that’s usually only for a special occasion.”
“Are you kidding?” Ellie makes a face. “My mom says I can stay out till midnight on the weekends, no problem.”
“Yeah well, I don’t rock the boat because I don’t want them to put spyware or whatever on my phone,” I tell her, knowing that’s something Ellie has to deal with. “Maybe we can tell them we’re staying the night at your house.”
“But I just told my mom I’m staying the night again here,” Ellie reminds me.
I just stare at her, hoping she’ll get the hint. And within a few seconds, I can tell she does.
“But what about my phone? My mom tracks me that way,” Ellie says.
“Leave it here,” I suggest. “She’ll think you’re at my house the rest of the night.”
Where do I come up with this stuff? I’m not the one who sneaks out and does bad things. That’s Jake. At one point, that was Autumn too.
I guess I’ve never had a reason to sneak around before.
Ellie’s quiet for a moment, though her eyes start to sparkle with mischief. “That is such a good idea.”
“What they don’t know, won’t hurt them,” I singsong.
“You are so right.” Ellie knocks her shoulder against mine. “And you are so bad. Since when did my best friend decide to be such a rebel?”
The moment I kissed Eli Bennett.
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