by Kate Brian
Suddenly Lexa froze. Everyone sat and waited for her to continue. And waited. And waited. But she simply sat there, some of the papers in her hand, the folder open on her lap, staring down.
“Sister Becky Sharp?” Palmer said finally, gently.
“Why is this in here?” Lexa’s voice was shrill in the silence. Shrill and loud. She dropped the papers in her hand and picked up the offending page. “Why is this in here? Is this some kind of joke, April? Some kind of sick joke?”
“It’s Miss Temple,” April said calmly. “And I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Lexa got up, scattering the papers and the folder everywhere, and shoved the page into April’s face. “I’m talking about this. What is this doing in the folder? Are you just that stupid, or did you leave it there on purpose? Because last I checked, Miss Temple, Lillian Oswald is no longer with us!”
A wave of total dizziness and nausea crashed over Ariana. No longer with us. Did she really have to say it that way?
Conrad got up and put his large hand on Lexa’s back. “It was just a simple mistake, Becky,” he said in a soothing tone. “Give it to me. We’ll just burn it.”
“No!” Lexa shouted, whirling on him. “It’s not a simple mistake! It’s not! Things have to be done a certain way around here. They have to be done. Done. Done the way they’re supposed to be done. Not this way. This is not the way this is supposed to happen, do you understand? I try! I try to make everything perfect! I can’t keep having these things go wrong! I can’t! I can’t have this on my hands! I can’t have this on my hands!”
On her hands, Ariana thought with a sinking realization. This was why Lexa kept washing her hands, carrying disinfecting wipes everywhere. She was trying to clean off the blood. The blood she imagined she had on her hands.
Everyone in the room was starting to mumble and shift uncomfortably as Lexa completely broke down in front of them. Ariana knew what was coming. Any second Lexa was going to go there. She was going to say something about the murder. About the blood. It was right there on the tip of her tongue. Terror seized Ariana’s heart like an ice-cold vise grip.
“Can’t have what on your hands, babe?” Conrad said, completely breaking Stone and Grave protocol. “What are you talking about?”
Lexa’s eyes were desperate as she opened her mouth to speak. Desperately searching for a lifeline. For someone to help her.
“Conrad, I—”
Without a moment to rethink it, Ariana hurtled herself to her feet.
“Lexa!”
Every single person in the room turned to look at Ariana. Lexa’s eyes flicked past Conrad’s shoulder and widened when they came to rest on Ariana’s panicked face. And then she looked down at the floor.
“I’m sorry. I can’t do this,” Lexa said. “I have to go.”
Then she dropped Lillian’s form on the floor and ran out, letting the doors slam behind her.
“What was that about?” Rob said.
Instantly, everyone started talking. Tahira got up and nudged Ariana. “What the hell was that? Why did you yell at her?”
“I . . . I wanted to make sure she was okay,” Ariana said off the cuff. Her fear was already beginning to subside, leaving behind the clarity of what she had just done. The oddity of her actions. “Was I that loud? I didn’t realize.”
Tahira simply shrugged, watching the mayhem as the meeting deteriorated around them.
“Maybe I should go after her,” Ariana said.
“No.”
Palmer’s voice filled the room. He was right at her shoulder. A chill went down her spine as his directive brought all conversation to a halt.
“No one goes anywhere,” Palmer said. He squeezed Ariana’s hand, then turned to the circle. “I want to see the execs right now. The rest of you hang out until we’ve had a chance to talk.”
Palmer planted a comforting kiss on Ariana’s temple, then walked over to an indentation in the wall, just behind Lexa’s headstone. Conrad, April, Soomie, and Rob followed. Ariana watched them closely. She knew they had to be discussing Lexa, and she had to find out what they were saying.
“Hey,” Jasper said, appearing at her left shoulder. “Anyone ever tell you you look hot in that robe?”
Ariana narrowed her eyes at him. “Don’t you mean Soomie looks hot?” she said.
Then, leaving him with his mouth gaping open, she walked away from him and Tahira and joined Maria, who was closest to the confabbing exec board.
“Okay. What do you think is going on with Lexa?” Ariana whispered.
“I don’t know,” Maria replied under her breath.
“. . . acting crazy . . . ,” Rob said.
“She’s just under a lot of stress,” Soomie defended.
“So are the rest of us,” April put in, clearly hurt and pouting over it. “You don’t see any of us freaking out.”
“She really hasn’t been sleeping at all,” Maria added. “The other night I woke up at three A.M. and she was in the bathroom, scrubbing her hands. I mean, what’s that about? It’s like she’s suddenly gone all OCD on us.”
“Weird,” Ariana agreed, swallowing back a new thump of dread. She was right about the imaginary blood. She knew it. She tilted her ear toward the group behind her.
“. . . know I love the girl,” Conrad was saying, “but this is unacceptable.”
“He’s right. We have to look out for Stone and Grave’s larger interests,” Palmer said.
“You guys, what’re you saying?” Soomie asked fretfully. “You can’t mean—”
“And then her mom called at six o’clock this morning,” Maria said, drowning out Soomie’s words. “I mean, the woman knows she’s not sleeping, so she calls at the crack of dawn? What’s that about?”
Ariana’s fingers curled into fists over having a vital bit of the conversation spoken over, but she knew it didn’t really matter. Because she knew in her heart of hearts what the execs were talking about. They were talking about removing Lexa as president of Stone and Grave. They were saying that if she didn’t get her act together, she was going to lose her position of power.
Which meant that, as Lexa’s best friend, she would lose any power she had in Stone and Grave as well—before she ever even got the chance to find out where that power could take her.
What are you doing right now, Reed? Ariana wondered, gritting her teeth as she stared down at the smudged photo in the newspaper, which was tucked inside her government text. What are you doing right now? Are you having brunch with your friends? Is Noelle there? Are you still dating that Boy Scout Josh Hollis? What are you thinking? Do you ever even think about me? About what you did to me? About where I am right now, because of you?
Someone dropped a heavy book on the other side of the stacks, and the slam brought Ariana back to the present. She heard someone curse under their breath as she looked around at the brightly lit Atherton-Pryce Hall library. The room was warm, thanks to a charming wood-burning fireplace in the corner, around which several students were gathered in plush chairs, their books splayed open across their laps. The sun streamed in through the skylights overhead, casting its beams along the spines of the classic, leather-bound books all around her. Ariana took a deep breath and sighed. Where she was right now actually wasn’t that bad. Not bad at all.
It was what she was dealing with that scared her. She looked up, across the three tables that separated her from Lexa. This morning Lexa appeared to be just fine, all cuddled into her white turtleneck sweater, poring over her history text with Conrad. Every now and then, Conrad would run his hand over her hair and look at her with concern, whisper something in her ear, kiss her cheek. He was taking care of her, which was a plus. But Conrad had no idea exactly what he was dealing with—nor did Ariana want him to find out.
Lexa was dangling precariously over the edge of the deep end. The slightest mishap could push her in at any moment, and the splash would take out not only her, but Ariana as well. After what had happened the night be
fore, Ariana knew what she had to do. She had to stick to Lexa like glue. She had to make sure that she stopped any future budding breakdowns before they could truly blossom. Otherwise, she was going to have to do something drastic. Something she didn’t even want to think about.
“Hey. There you are.”
Suddenly Palmer’s arms enveloped her from behind. She slammed her government book closed over the newspaper, her pulse suddenly fluttering at an alarming rate. If Palmer had noticed that she was staring at an old sports section featuring girls’ soccer, he was definitely going to ask her about it. What was she supposed to say? I’ve suddenly developed an interest in women’s sports?
Palmer gave her a kiss on the cheek and lowered herself into the chair next to hers. His eyes flicked to Lexa and Conrad, and he gave Connie a nod.
“So. How’s she been?” he asked Ariana.
Taking a deep breath, Ariana laid her government book aside, relieved, at least, that Reed wasn’t about to become a topic of conversation.
“Okay. Fine,” she said brightly. “They’ve been over there since before I arrived and not a peep.”
“Good. That’s good,” Palmer said. Still, he kept his gaze on Lexa, as if he was mulling something over. Deciding whether or not to try to have her removed as president, perhaps? The very idea made Ariana sick to her stomach. Lexa loved being president of Stone and Grave. Having that taken away from her would only make her condition worse.
Not to mention that Ariana would never be able to exert her power over Lexa to get things done the way she wanted.
“You know, I was thinking about it last night and I realized . . . Lexa’s actually been acting weird all semester,” Palmer said, placing his elbows on the table. He turned toward Ariana and rested his cheek on his fist, as if trying to hide his words from the girl who was yards away.
“Really? How?” Ariana asked, preparing herself to refute anything he said.
“Well, first there was the cheating during welcome week,” Palmer said. “That was not her style.”
Ariana shifted uncomfortably in her seat. Lexa hadn’t had anything to do with the cheating. Ariana had sabotaged one of the other boats for the crew race—and let Palmer blame it on Lexa.
“And then there was that whole thing with Lillian,” Palmer continued.
Now Ariana’s heart shifted into overdrive. “What whole thing with Lillian?”
“They way she just let Lillian in? Invited her to Stone and Grave?” Palmer said, lifting a shoulder. “We all told her she had to vet the girl, but she was all ‘Lillian’s good people. I like her. Case closed.’ It wasn’t until later when all the questions were raised about her that Lexa finally started to listen. And then, Lily up and disappears. I mean, how weird is that?”
Ariana forced herself to breathe slowly. Tried to figure out exactly how she was supposed to react to all of this—how a person who knew nothing about any of it would react.
“Well . . . Lillian leaving school . . . that had nothing to do with Lexa,” Ariana said.
Palmer looked at her and narrowed his eyes. It was almost as if he was studying her. Almost as if he was thinking that Lillian’s disappearance had something to do with . . . her.
“And then there’s you,” he said.
Ariana’s heart stopped beating in her chest. Her mouth went dry, and she reached for her bottle of water, her mind racing. It was never good when people started to ask questions—when they started to really think about what was going on around them, trying to see the big picture. Clearly that was what Palmer was doing now. But how close was he to the truth? Did he really suspect Ariana, or was he just fishing?
“What do you mean, then there’s me?” she asked slowly.
“Well, last year everything was normal. So I was trying to figure out what’s different and then I realized . . . you are. You show up on campus and suddenly there’s all this . . . drama,” Palmer said, sitting back in his chair. “Are you a bringer of drama, Ana Covington?” he said, half-teasing, half-serious.
“Adam’s new this year too,” Ariana snapped. “Have you tracked him down and blamed him yet?”
Palmer blinked, surprised. “Sorry. I was just kidding,” he said. “Thinking out loud.”
Ariana clutched her water bottle. She stared at one little drop as it wound its way down from the mouth of the bottle and into the pool of untouched water at the bottom.
Just focus, she told herself. Just breathe. Palmer doesn’t know anything. How could he possibly know?
She looked at Palmer out of the corner of her eye, hoping he would be the picture of chagrin. But instead, he was still watching her, as if he was trying to see inside of her. As if there was something odd there that he was trying to understand. This boy needed some serious distraction. And he needed it now.
“Look, I don’t know if I’m a bringer of drama or what,” Ariana said, turning her knees toward him. “But I do know that thinking out loud is a highly overrated pastime.”
She lifted her leg, crooking it over his, and slid even closer. Palmer raised his eyebrows, intrigued.
“Oh yeah? Did you have some other activity in mind?” he said, slipping his arm around the back of her chair.
“Most definitely,” she replied.
Then she leaned in and touched her lips to his, fully aware that the entire population of the library was watching them. She cupped her hand around the back of his neck and drew him into her, deepening the kiss and eliciting a moan from the back of his throat. Any second now, this was going to get broken up by one of the librarians, but until it did, Ariana was going to make sure that Palmer was good and distracted.
She was going to make him forget all about Ana Covington as a potential bringer of drama.
“So that is when I told Fellini, if you want something done right . . . let me do it!” Maria’s father said, his voice booming across the small parlor.
The small crowd that had gathered around Maria’s parents laughed heartily, and Mr. Stanzini sipped his mimosa. His slim, couture-clad wife hung on to his arm, her huge sunglasses pushed casually back into her short brown hair. They were every bit as glamorous as Ariana had imagined, but she was having a hard time paying attention to this parental conversation too. She had lost sight of Lexa, which, considering they were standing in the very room where Kaitlynn’s death had transpired, was very not good.
“Will you all excuse me for a moment, please?” Ariana said.
Mr. Stanzini nodded, which was enough for her. Ariana shook her head at a passing waiter as he offered another full tray of mimosas and ducked past Mr. Montgomery’s elbow as he gestured his way through another story. She saw Jasper eye her with curiosity as she glanced around the room, but she ignored him. There were far more important things on her mind than Jasper and whatever it was he might be thinking.
Finally, out of the corner of her eye, Ariana saw a flash of red. She paused, and her heart squeezed. Lexa was walking through the yard outside the parlor windows. Walking toward the rose bushes.
You let your guard down for two seconds . . .
Ariana rushed to the French doors that led out to the garden. The sun shone down on the lazily falling leaves, and her feet crunched through them as she hurried to join her friend. The disarray of the yard was just another testament to the fact that they had chosen the right burial plot for Kaitlynn. Clearly no one ever came back here. It seemed that the Greenes had even neglected to hire a landscaper to rake the leaves.
Lexa stopped just inches from the recently turned-over earth. She reached up and toyed with her gold necklace, shivering as a cold November breeze rustled the bare branches of the rose bushes.
“What are you doing?” Ariana hissed, coming up behind her.
Lexa flinched but didn’t turn to look at Ariana. Her gaze was trained on the base of the bushes. The exact spot where Kaitlynn’s body now rotted away.
“Nothing,” Lexa said. “Just . . . going for a walk.”
Her bottom lip trembled, and tear
s brimmed in her eyes. Ariana felt the briefest pang of sympathy for Lexa—clearly the girl was not as strong as she’d originally hoped—but the sympathy quickly hardened into anger. This weakness could get them both in serious trouble.
“You need to relax,” Ariana told her, standing just behind Lexa’s shoulder. “Whoever Keiko hired to fix the window did a perfect job, and it’s obvious no one’s been back here and no one’s coming back here. Unless, of course, they come out after us.”
“I don’t understand how you can be okay with all of this,” Lexa whispered, not looking at Ariana. “It’s like you’re a robot or something.”
Ariana’s face warmed. “Thanks a lot.”
“All I can think about when I stand here is the blood. All that blood,” Lexa whispered, ignoring Ariana’s comment. “It took forever for me to get it off my hands, and sometimes, it’s like it’s still there.”
“Lexa,” Ariana said in a warning tone. “I—”
“My life as I knew it . . . it’s over,” Lexa whispered harshly, turning to her. “It’s ruined, all because of her. Because of—”
Behind them, someone opened a window, and laughter wafted its way toward them on the breeze.
“Lexa!” Ariana hissed through her teeth. “Your life is not ruined. Look around.” She grabbed Lexa’s arms and forcibly turned her, making her look back at the huge windows and the party going on behind them. “Your friends are still your friends. Your parents are doing just fine. Everything is just as it was, and do you know why? Because no one knows. And no one else will ever know. Unless you screw it up.”
Lexa glanced at Ariana, her eyes wide, as if startled. As if it had never occurred to her until that moment that she was responsible for her own fate. Ariana could have smacked her across the face. Was she the only person around here who knew how to count on herself ? Who knew that the future was all that mattered?