by Amber Nicole
I guess I wasn't as lucky as I thought my first day of school on the steps. Someone snapped a photo of me with tears streaming down my face while zoned out. They created this really nasty saying,
"Oh poor little Grace, with her memories misplaced, she's such a disgrace." If that wasn't bad enough they decided to turn it into a meme and paste it all over school, as well as on social media.
Home life seems to be getting better though I think my grounding is almost over and I did get to meet Gray’s wife. She’s lovely and we found out the gender, they are having a little girl. No name yet but I’m excited. Gray is still angry with me, our relationship is now different from how it was when I woke up. He’s pleasant in front of the family but seems on edge when we are alone. My nightmares have been getting worse, and my flashbacks more confusing.
My latest one came during last week's family dinner.
Sitting at the table Anna, Gray’s wife, asked him if he had to work late this week, all of a sudden I was thrown into a flashback.
I drive to Gray’s office to check in and see if he wants to have dinner before the big football game tonight. There’s a familiar car beside me when I park. I wonder why Mia’s here? Maybe she needs some legal advice. She’s been acting super shady lately. Always on edge, never wanting to hang out. I get out of my car and head into the building. I take the elevator up to Gray’s floor. It's quiet which isn't unusual for a Friday. Much less a football game night. Football is a big event around here the whole town shuts down for those few hours. It's fuzzy but there is also another reason why I love football, maybe a player on the team. I can't remember.
I step off the elevator and walk towards his office. The door is cracked and I can hear talking. Thinking he's on the phone I take a seat in the waiting lounge. After a few minutes I hear a woman's voice that sounds familiar but deeper or maybe huskier than I've ever heard it before.
“We need to hurry or we will be late. I’m waiting to hear back from the doctor so there is no reason to worry yet. Let’s just calm down and talk about this okay? You had to know this could happen. I told you I wasn’t on anything, but someone was too impatient.”
I think that's Mia talking. I stand up to announce my presence, not sure if this is a private client attorney discussion, when I hear Gray respond. “Whatever the verdict is doesn’t matter M, it will be taken care of quickly and quietly. No one can know about this, especially Gracie.”
“Gracie, everything is about Gracie. Well you know what I’m sick of it. Perfect, sweet, caring Gracie. If I’m not constantly hearing about her from you, I'm hearing about her from Ashton. She’s not so perfect you know, she tells me things. Things that would shock you all.”
What is Mia talking about? The most shocking thing I’ve ever done is sleep with my boyfriend, but everyone knows that. Thanks to the birth control discussion last month during Sunday family dinner. Talk about awkward, I thought I was embarrassed, my dad's face almost turned blood red with his blushing. That's what happens when your mom is a woman's doctor though. Finally having done enough accidental snooping I stand up and talk loudly like I’m on the phone and move closer to his office door.
“Yes mom I’ll remind him I’m just seeing if he wants to grab a quick bite before the game. Okay love you too, bye.” I pretend to hang up then yell, “Hey bro you busy?”
I knock on his door then enter.
“Gracie what a great surprise, what's up?” He looks a little green. That must have been one hell of a conversation.
“Hey Mia, I thought maybe that was your car in the lot. Am I interrupting anything?” I try to give her an innocent look but I’m rather annoyed by her and I think she can tell, for her face goes pale. Then like a switch her expression turns almost evil.
"No girl, everything is great. Gray is just offering me some legal advice, nothing to worry about though. But we're done here so I'll meet you at the game. Gray, we will be in touch," She says in a voice that gives me chills. I wonder what that's all about.
That was it, such a random flashback, though I feel it was important. Only time will tell.
13
Ashton
Weeks, it’s been weeks since the night I locked Gracie in the shed and had a drunken breakdown. I had to get out of town. Just being in her proximity was not good for my mental health. My emotions have been all over the place. I’m angry, understandably so, but I’m also craving her with a hunger that I need to avoid, and this was only after day one. I want to strangle her for everything she's done, then the next minute I want to just grab her and throw her against the wall and devour her mouth like I’m starving. Which I have been. Fuck I know I shouldn’t be, but no one since her can satisfy me.
No chick will ever control me again. Been there, done that, have the T-shirt. No seriously I still have a stupid shirt Gracie gave me for my birthday one year. It says, “I do what I want,” then in small print below says, “Let me just ask my girlfriend first.”
I loved that shirt and wore it proudly back then. I should probably burn it now.
Continuing the drive back home I look at the fall leaves now on all the trees rather than a couple like they were when I drove out of here about a month ago. It reminds me of when we used to go for long drives for no reason.
"Hey babe, you ready to go?" I ask Gracie when she comes out her front door with her overnight bag stuffed to the brim.
"Doll, you know we're only going to be gone the weekend right?"
"Yeah, but babe the weather is changing so I had to pack some warmer stuff just in case, plus I have one of your favorite hoodies to keep me warm, but I know by tomorrow you're going to need it. Let me guess you have boxers, basketball shorts, a T-shirt and socks? I baked some goodies for the trip too and they are taking up a good portion of my bag," she says, with an eye roll, and giggle.
"Oh well, in that case forget I mentioned it." I reach over and grab her throat giving her one hell of a kiss. Before I can get lost in her lips I pull back giving her a grin and look into her lust filled gaze.
"Later babe, we have all weekend. No parents, or practice just you and me. I got us a room with a hot tub, and a view. You can look out over the Catskills, while I look at your delectable body."
She gently smacks my chest before laying her hand in between my shoulder and my neck gripping softly.
"Sounds like heaven Ash."
It doesn't take us long till we are on the highway out of town. Roof pulled back on my convertible, the fall breeze blowing through her long sunset hair, her hand in mine while the sun catches on her engagement ring. Life is bliss."
I snap back when I hear a honk, realizing I was so lost in my memories I started to drift into the other lane. I see that I'm only ten minutes from home. Wow must have been really zoned out if I lost forty-five minutes to my thoughts.
I'm ready to be back. Coach has been on my case daily. Not to mention Dom blowing up my phone. I know he's worried, he's been keeping an eye on my dollface, making sure she's not getting comfortable without me there.
The thing about having parents that don’t give a shit about you means I can do whatever the hell I want. Shooting the principal a quick email from my dad's home computer allowed me time to get away, but honestly they probably wouldn’t have cared as long as I kept winning games for them. They certainly didn’t the last time it happened.
“Tristan, sweetie you need to go home. It’s been two weeks since the accident. You can't keep showering here and sleeping in that chair. When was the last time you had a real meal, not something out of the cafeteria or vending machine? It’s time honey. Gracie wouldn't want to see you like this. Wasting away by her bedside,” Gracie’s mom, Christine, asks from the chair next to me, taking my hand.
“I can’t leave her. She’s all I have left. She needs me,” I whisper, my throat sore from all the talking and reading aloud I've been doing. They say even though she's in a coma she may be able to hear me. So I've been reading all her favorite books, reminiscing about all the ti
mes we've spent together, and talking about our future and what we will do.
“Tristan I think..”
There’s a knock on the door. They don’t wait to be invited in. Two policemen push into the room. It’s Dom’s dad and uncle.
“Ah good you're both here. Mrs. Rose, Mr. Daniels there has been some new evidence brought forward regarding your daughter’s accident, and your sister’s death. When we searched your daughter’s things left at the scene including her car we found an envelope addressed to Ash. Since it was considered evidence we did open it. I’m sorry to say the contents were unsettling. It is evidence so you can’t remove it from the bag, but Dom would kill me if I kept this from you. You’re like my other son and I’m here for you okay? I’ve called Dom if you would like to wait? He is on his way here now?” he tells me, moving forward to rest his hand on my shoulder.
“You’re going to have to give me a minute here, sir. I'm sleep deprived and not at full capacity right now. Why is Dom on his way here? What was in the envelope? Why would Gracie leave me something?”
Gracie’s mom gasps from beside me. “No, no, no no no.” She bursts into tears and runs from the room. Confusing me more, what am I missing here? Dom walks in face as white as a ghost. “Hey man, how are you holding up? I still can't believe it, it can't be true right? Not Gracie.”
“Son, stop talking!” Mr. Branson snaps, cutting him off.
I stand up, I've had enough. “Give me the envelope sir, now!” I demand. Slowly almost as if he's trying to delay as much time as possible he pulls out a sealed evidence bag holding three items. The envelope, a letter and what looks like maybe a small picture, it's black with gray on it but I can't see it clearly right now.
“Tristan, maybe you should sit down son before I hand this to you.”
I don't respond, I just hold my hand out. Tentatively he hands it to me. I wish I never took it, for what I read completely destroyed whatever soul I may have had left.
Ash, I’m sorry … too young … not ready … depressed … ruin your dreams … so much stress …. love you always forever and on.”
My life has forever been changed.
I take a deep breath, tears blur my eyes. I can't think about that right now. I get off at my exit then take a left and hit the bakery for a coffee before I head home. I pull into a parking spot and put my car in park. I need a few minutes to compose myself.
My shoulders relax as the smells of the bakery hit. I always loved this place even if it does hold too many memories. Walking over to the counter, I order my coffee then take a moment to look around.
Sitting in a giant chair in the corner lost in her own world reading is my dollface and I feel like smiling for the first time in weeks. I shut that shit down quick. Grabbing my drink, I make my way slowly over to her. I get all the way in front of her before she notices someone in her light.
Only glancing up quickly she looks back down to her book. I wait a few more seconds.
She jumps then looks back up with a panicked expression. “Asher, you startled me. Can I help you with something?” she says. Who the fuck is Asher?
“Now, now dollface, don't tell me I was gone so long you don’t remember my name?” I reply giving her a cocky smirk. Smacking her forehead with her palm she says, “Oh I’m so sorry, yes your name is Ashton. People were calling you Ash, and until Dom told me your name I assumed it was Asher. Please forgive me. I assume that’s why you came over to speak with me? Dom told you what I said?”
What the shit is she talking about? “I haven't seen Dom yet. No I came over here to ask if you’re ready yet? If you have had enough of the punishments and are ready to just concede to me?”
She has the cutest confusion face I have ever seen. Shit no, she has an ugly face. She’s already getting in my head again. I need to end this conversation quickly and call Tinsley or someone for some stress relief.
“Um I’m not sure what you’re implying. Yes. I am done with the bullying but I'm not sure what I’m supposed to concede to,” she asks while biting her lip nervously.
“While this playing coy is fun, I have plans, so when you’re ready to be my slave let me know? Until then have a good day in hell tomorrow. I’m out.” I walk away, head back to my car, call Tinsley and lose myself for a few hours, hoping it numbs the pain. It doesn't, nothing ever does.
14
Gracie
After watching Ashton leave, I decide to start the short walk back home. I make it in time for family dinner. Claiming a migraine I grab a quick plate then head up to my room for the night. I haven't been sleeping well, these nightmares are getting worse and more vivid every night. Reaching my room I let out a sigh of relief. I set my food down on the table next to my bed and turn on some music then lie back on my pillow. I close my eyes hoping for a quick nap praying for it to be nightmare free. So much for that.
“Hey Gracie let's go for a walk. This smoke is upsetting my stomach and making me lightheaded,” my bestie Mia says. I get up and give Ash a passionate kiss. “Hey we’ll be back just going for a quick walk. Love you.” I tell my amazing fiance. Eeek can't believe it but Ashton proposed a few weeks back, a couple days after my seventeenth birthday. He grabs me, giving me one more dominating kiss before letting us go.
I grab Mia’s hand and we start on our walk. “Hey everything okay? You’ve been off recently. Did everything work out okay with that whole legal stuff?” I ask her.
She's quiet for a while as we walk but eventually says, “Yeah girl everything’s great. Especially after tonight. Things will be right on track for me to finally get what I want, and by next month I’ll have everything I have ever wanted.”
Not sure what she means by that but I’m happy for her. She deserves to be happy.
“That's great Mi, I know things haven't been amazing these past few weeks. I want you to be happy, you're my best friend, soon to be sister,” I say with a giant smile on my face. She stops to face me and says, “you're right about one of those things.” Then keeps walking forward. What does that mean? What is with her lately, she's been so unnecessarily cruel. Ash and I discussed it the other day and he said it’s not just with me. She's been super moody and snapping at everyone. He thinks maybe she's doing drugs, but I haven't seen any signs of it. I mean she didn't even ask me to DD for her tonight. I don’t party but Mia does any chance she gets. I get it—her home life isn't the best. Absent parents, and when they are home they are too busy to acknowledge their kids. Ash and her practically live at my house. Mom and Dad already call Ash son. Looking around I see that we are really far from the party now. Where is she going? It’s starting to get pitch black out.
"Mia, where are we going? Let's just head back to the party, Ash is going to come looking for us, we've been gone for more than thirty minutes. Mia, are you listening? This is really dangerous? It's dark and I'm really not wearing proper shoes for this hike."
Mia turns and looks at me with such disgust and hatred in her eyes causing me to stumble back a step.
"God, Grace can you ever just shut up? Perfect little Grace, gets everything she ever wants. Well I'm over it now we're going to do what I want. I’ve spent way too many hours planning this for you to fuck it up! Couldn't just mind your own damn business. Had to stick your nose where it didn't belong."
Taken back by the venomous tone in her voice. I turn and head back to the party only to have her grip my arm hard with her nails digging into the flesh, causing me to scream.
“What the hell Mia? That really hurts! Wait Mia slow down, where are you taking me? This really isn't funny! Please Mia stop! No, no Mia we’re up too high you know I hate heights! What are you doing? Mia stop pushing me closer to the edge! MIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!”
Falling, I remember falling and hearing a voice say, “one down, one to go then he's mine.”
Then nothing.
Why am I moving?
“Gracie wake up!”
I feel someone shaking the crap out of me. I open my eyes to Gray’s face. S
tartled, I sit upright and scoot back on the bed up against my headboard.
“Gray, what are you doing? Why are you in my room?”
He lets out an exasperated breath. “You were screaming in your sleep. Mia, no stop. Mia please don’t, then let out an earth-shattering scream. Scared the hell out of Mom and Anna. Want to tell me what's going on?” he asks.
“Pretty much the same as before. I have super vivid nightmares, or maybe they are memories of that night? But Mia would never try and hurt me right? You said it’s just a side effect from my injury? But why do they get more detailed every night? It’s like my brain is trying to tell me something?” He looks down to the floor for a few moments before looking at me with guilt and tears in his eyes.
“Gracie I’m really worried about you. You look like you haven't been sleeping, you're losing weight again. I think maybe we should talk about sending you somewhere for a little while just till you get better? Mia loved you, she would never hurt you. I know you know that.”
I look at him, really look at him. “You mean like she loved you?” The words come out before I can even think about what I’m saying. Where did that even come from? But from the look of shock on his face and his skin paling I know I’m on to something.
He stands suddenly heading towards the door. ”I don’t know what you’re implying Gracie but Mia was like a little sister to me. Your injury is making you delusional. Anna and I are heading out. I love you. I'll see you next week.”
Then he’s gone. Ran out of here like the hounds of Hell were chasing him. A door slams from down the hall.
“What just happened?” I say aloud. Can I even trust anything he says? Maybe I am losing my mind.