His comment chips away at my self-esteem, making me feel exposed without my blouse to cover my stomach. I’m not skinny, but I never considered myself fat, either. During the past two weeks with Christopher, I even felt sexy.
When I’m untied, my body just drops to the floor, making my muscles ache and spasm. Pins and needles in my arms and hands make it impossible for me to push myself up.
Josh pulls me into a sitting position against the wall, then he gives me a loving smile that makes my stomach churn. “There you go. That’s better, right?”
Not answering him, I glance down at my raw wrists while he walks back to the paper bag. He takes out a bottle of water and a container. Bringing it over to me, he sets it down on the floor. “Eat.”
There’s fruit salad in the container, and the sight of it instantly makes my mouth water. I haven’t eaten anything since the breakfast on Sunday morning.
Cautiously, I reach for the water, knowing it’s more important than food right now. I struggle to uncap the bottle, my fingers numb and my hands shaking too much. I’m scared I’ll drop the water. When I have the bottle open, I drink the fluid as fast as I can.
Josh reaches a hand out to me, and frightened, I drop the bottle and scramble to the side. The remainder of the water spills over the wooden floor, and it has Josh shaking his head at me. “Look what you’ve done.” When his eyes lift to mine, the friendliness that was there a moment ago is nowhere to be seen as it’s replaced with the lifeless expression. “Lick it up. You’re going to need every drop.”
There’s no way I’m doing that.
“Lick it!” he suddenly shouts at me.
I shake my head. “I won’t. I’m not a dog.”
His fist connects with the corner of my mouth, and I feel the skin split as I fall to the side from the force.
Josh takes hold of my jaw, but I yank my face away. It only makes him chuckle as he grabs painfully ahold of me again, forcing me to look at him.
The blood from my split lip follows an uncertain trail to my chin. Josh glances at it then shakes his head. “Look what you made me do. When will you learn?”
My body trembles uncontrollably as fear for this man floods me. I swallow hard and force myself to keep looking at him.
“Stop fighting me, Dash. Things can be so good between us again.” His face turns almost tender, making me feel rattled to my core.
I don’t know which side of him I fear more, the aggressive or the caring. His aggression might lead to my death, but the caring… that might lead to rape. Both possibilities terrify me.
Josh leans closer, and then he takes a deep breath as if he’s smelling me. “Tell me, Dash, what would you do for a bath?”
“N-nothing.” I falter. I hate myself for showing fear in his presence.
He rises to his feet, picking up the container of food. “I guess you’re not that hungry after all. Good, we’ll have your weight under control in no time.”
He walks to the counter and opening the container, he throws the fruit out on the wooden surface.
I push up on my feet, but as he turns, I freeze.
Josh shakes his head at me. “Arms up.”
No. Not again.
I wrap my arms around my waist as I back into the wall.
“Dash,” he growls, the word laced with warning.
Desperate to keep him from tying me up again, I say, “Can we talk? Please? It’s been five years. I don’t understand why you’re doing this to me.”
His eyes narrow on me, and slowly he begins to creep closer. “I’m not doing anything to you. This…” he gestures around the cabin, “is all because you cheated on me. Did you really think I’d just watch you marry Christopher?”
“It’s been five years!” I scream at him.
My outburst makes him lunge at me, and I instantly bring up my arms to protect myself as he begins to hit me. A blow to my ear makes a sharp pain shoot through my head, followed by a low ringing noise.
Before I can recover from the hit, Josh yanks my arms up and ties my wrists again. Seconds later, I’m hoisted back into the air, my ear still ringing while bile pushes up my throat. My body begins to convulse as I lose the little water I managed to drink earlier.
Instead of letting me down, Josh just watches me, leaving me hanging in the vulnerable position.
CHRISTOPHER
It’s been two fucking days. Fifty-three hours.
There are no words to describe how I feel. Not knowing where Dash is and what she’s going through –makes my skin crawl, my body physically aches, my heart feels like it will stop beating at any moment.
The powerlessness is suffocating and relentless.
The worry for Dash is in every breath I take.
Is she still alive?
The thought shreds through me like barbwire, wreaking devastation through every fiber of my being.
My breaths start coming faster, and Dad instantly senses my distress. Taking hold of my arm, he pulls me out of the room where Tristan and Alexei have been working non-stop to find Dash.
Dad pulls me to the bathroom and shutting the door behind us, his arms wrap around me. He doesn’t say anything because there are no words to comfort me.
“I just want her back,” I groan, my body shaking. “How am I supposed to process this? What if we don’t find her?”
Dad’s hold on me tightens. “We’ll find her.”
Not knowing what’s happening to her is the killer.
What if she’s dead, buried in a shallow grave of dirt.
My Dash. My life.
How am I supposed to face tomorrow without her?
I grind my teeth as I pull back, locking eyes with my father. “The not knowing is killing me, Dad.”
He brings his hands to the sides of my neck, his stare intense and filled with the strength I don’t have. “Dash is a fighter. She’s clever. She’ll survive. You have to believe in her.”
Dad’s right.
Dash might find a way to escape.
I have to focus on the hope, or I won’t be worth shit to her.
Nodding, I murmur, “I’m okay.” Walking back to the room, I take a seat next to Tristan, and I begin to go through everything they found on Sullivan. The properties he owns, where he’s been, and who he’s been in contact with. I inspect every inch of his life, trying to find a clue.
After thirty minutes, I get up, and when I walk out of the room, Uncle Jax falls into step next to me, asking, “Where are we going?”
“To speak with Sullivan. All this guessing isn’t getting us any closer to finding Dash.”
I might be grasping at nothing, but Sullivan is the only lead I have right now.
We pay Sullivan a visit, but learning that he’s on a business trip for the past week, leaves our hands tied when it comes to him.
Chapter 17
DASH
A wave of dizziness washes over me, making me feel sick.
“Why did you do it, Dash?” Josh suddenly asks. “We were so good together.”
He returned a while ago, only to stare at me. I feel the atmosphere tensing around me. I gulp in some air, my stomach coiling with fear. “You’re insane,” I mumble, lifting my eyes to his.
“That’s all you have to say to me?” He raises an annoyed eyebrow.
“It’s been five years,” I cry out of desperation. “Who freaking kidnaps their ex-girlfriend?”
“I never said things were over between us. I had a private detective watch you. Discretely, of course. I patiently waited for the day you would betray me. I have to admit, I expected it to happen much sooner.”
“What the hell are you talking about?” I cry, my desperation and fear growing rapidly. “We weren’t together. How did I betray you?”
“Don’t act stupid with me,” he snaps. “I told you it’s only a matter of time before you cheated on me. How do you think it makes me feel to be right? It pains me to see you like this, but if I don’t punish you, you’ll just do it again. You’ll keep spi
raling out of control. This is for the best.” Josh sighs as if he’s losing his patience with me, then he hisses, “By the time I’m done with you, you’ll know your place.”
“You’re insane,” I cry again as my panic and fear spiral into a brutal storm in my chest.
Shaking his head, his voice is deceptively calm as he says, “Tell me you’re sorry for what you’ve done and that you love me, and I’ll consider letting you eat.”
What the hell?
“No,” I grind the word out.
His features tighten until he looks murderous. My heart begins to race, and my muscles instantly tense up.
“Do you really want to play this game with me?” He laughs humorlessly. “If you really don’t love me, you’re worth nothing to me. Why would I keep you alive then?”
Before I can register any movement from him, a dreadful pain spreads across my face. His fist slams hard into my jaw, knocking my head back. An intense copper taste fills my mouth. Heaving, I force myself to swallow the blood.
The next punch is harder, splitting my lip again. I don’t bother swallowing the blood this time. Instead, I spit it at him. I quickly realize it was a stupid thing to do when Josh begins to take off his belt.
Josh moves behind me, and I try to keep my eyes on him, but I can’t. When I lose sight of him, my fear spirals out of control.
God. No.
I hear something fall to the floor, and my stomach coils into a hard knot.
No. No. No. Anything but this.
My whole body is wound so tightly, I’m shivering uncontrollably. I hear the belt buckle being dragged across the floor, and then the leather snaps. It’s a horrible sound, and as the belt cracks through the air, I cringe.
The leather lashes at my back, white-hot pain licking across my skin. I scream and arch away from the belt, even though I’m filled with relief that he’s at least not raping me.
“You’re nothing without me,” he growls.
Another strike has pain searing itself into my flesh, drawing another agonizing scream from me.
He grabs hold of my hair, yanking my head back. I feel his breath on my ear, and it sends a wave of revulsion through me. “Do you really think you’d be able to get Christopher to marry you? He’d get tired of your fat ass always displaying every inch of skin. Men like him don’t share what belongs to them.”
The belt burns over my back again, making my body arch in an attempt to get away from the pain.
“Men like Christopher need a trophy wife on their arm,” he sneers, his words shredding my self-esteem to pieces as the leather tears at my skin.
When my screams turn to whimpers, it finally stops. There’s a constant ringing in my ears. My heart stopped racing, and I wish it would stop beating. The pain is too much. I know I have to be strong, but it’s too much.
Josh grabs hold of my hair again, yanking my head back, and then I feel his breath sticking to my jaw as he says, “Tell me you love me, Dash.”
I love Christopher.
“Go to hell,” my words slur. I want them to sound stronger. There’s no way I’ll ever tell him I love him. Those words belong to Christopher.
“Christopher’s not coming for you.” Josh comes around me until he’s standing in front of me. “He doesn’t care about you. Not the way I do.”
“He loves me,” I whisper. “He’ll come, and he’ll kill you for this.”
It’s the only hope I have.
It’s the only thought keeping me sane.
Josh raises an eyebrow at me, then he walks back to the paper bag. He pulls a brown envelope out, and as he comes back toward me, he removes A4 size photos. One by one, he drops them on the floor in front of me.
God, he really did have me followed.
How did I not know about this? Surely, I would’ve noticed, or at least feel someone watching me?
There’s one of me kissing Christopher in front of Tiffany & Co. Another of us kissing outside the restaurant the night we celebrated our engagement.
Just seeing Christopher’s face. God. I miss him so much.
There are also ones of Aunt Della, my mom, Miss Sebastian, Danny, and me looking at the wedding venue. The rest are of my father, Uncle Carter, and Christopher talking to Tristan and Alexei at a house I don’t recognize.
My lips curve up as hope explodes in my chest.
They are looking for me.
The flat of Josh’s hand connects with my cheek. “What is that smile for?”
I shake my head, but it only earns me another slap.
“Seeing my mother,” I yell at him.
My answer seems to calm him a little, but then he lifts his hands again, and when he takes hold of the sides of my head, panic and disgust floods me. Josh leans into me, and I begin to struggle to free myself from his grip.
He gives me a glare of warning, and the moment I keep still, his mouth presses to mine.
I shut my eyes tightly and firmly press my lips together until he pulls back. “I love you so much, Dash. Why can’t you understand I’m doing this for us? We can be so happy together.”
Bile rises in my throat as I realize I have a front-row seat to the unveiling of the monster that’s been living inside of Josh’s rotten soul all along.
God, why did my path ever cross with his?
It feels as if time has slowed down, and I’m stuck in an endless, torturous cycle with Josh. He hasn’t left since he got here this morning, and it’s already starting to grow dark.
I have no strength left.
“Tell me you love me,” he repeats again.
I can’t even shake my head where I hang limply. He’s been repeating the question, and when I don’t say the words, he resorts to either lashing my back with the belt or slapping me.
He keeps taunting me with food. Holding a slice of apple in his hand, he demands, “Tell me you love me, and I’ll let you eat.”
I’m weeping with pain, but there are no tears left to cool my face. My body is too dehydrated to generate any kind of fluid. Josh’s dead eyes stare into my feverish ones, and I can’t breakaway.
My breathing is sluggish. I haven’t eaten in three days, and my stomach is cramping from the lack of water and food.
I contemplate playing along, just to get food for energy, but I can’t force the words over my lips.
Suddenly, Josh reaches up, and when he unties my hand, my body slumps against his. He holds me to him, then presses a kiss to my temple. “Shh… I’ll make everything better.”
An intense fear, the likes of which I’ve never felt before, floods every corner of me.
“Shh,” Josh whispers again. “Don’t cry, my love.”
My body shakes uncontrollably as I keep quiet. What’s the use of even trying to reason with him anymore?
I’m unable to stop him as he picks me up and carries me to the bathroom. The shaking in my body grows as he sets me down on the floor.
He opens the faucets, and water begins to pour into the tub.
Limply, I try to shake my head as I whimper, “Don’t.”
“Shh,” he hushes me. “I’ll get you all cleaned up, then you can eat and get a good night’s rest. Tomorrow is a new day. I’m sure you’ll feel better then.”
Better for what? More torture?
Josh leaves me alone for a moment, and I hear the front door open and close.
Using the last of my strength, I claw at the wall and tub to get up. My breaths grow harsh from the energy it takes to keep myself standing.
Before I can manage a step, I hear the front door open and close. I slump back against the wall, sliding down to the floor. Josh comes back into the bathroom, carrying a bag. He sets it down on the toilet lid then crouches next to me.
When he reaches for my skirt, a meager burst of energy rushes through me. I slap weakly at his hand and try to get up.
Josh backhands me hard, slamming the side of my head against the tub. Everything blacks out, and I’m left powerless as I feel him tug at my underwear.
Submerged in the bowels of hell and unable to protect myself, despair darkens every corner of my soul as Josh begins to wash my body and hair. Every bruise comes to life until it feels like my back and face are on fire.
When he washes between my legs, wrenching agony tears through me, making it feel like my insides are being twisted. I gag empty pain-filled coughs, which only makes the pain worse.
A few moments later, he stops washing me and grabs hold of my face. His fingers dig into my cheek, but I’m too exhausted to yank away as he presses a kiss to my mouth. “Doesn’t that feel good?” he croons before giving me another kiss. “We’re starting to make progress. See, everything will be better soon.”
He lifts me out of the tub and dries my body before dressing me in clean underwear and a pale green long sleeve dress that falls to my feet.
At least I’m covered.
Josh carries me to the bedroom this time, and again I’m overwhelmed with a paralyzing fear. He sets me down on a bed, then leaves. Seconds later, he comes back with a glass of water.
I’m thirsty and will do almost anything for water, but when he lifts my head from the pillow and holds the glass to my mouth, I press my lips together.
I’d rather die of thirst than owe him anything.
“You need to drink,” Josh says softly, almost lovingly. “Come on.” Pressing the glass closer to my mouth, a few drops spill onto my feverish lips. Sadly, it’s all the encouragement I need. I get two gulps down before he pulls it away.
“Not too fast, you can have more in a minute.” I feel a sudden pang of loss as he leaves the room with the water.
But then he comes back in with a bowl. When I see it’s fruit, a sob escapes my lips.
Josh spears a piece of apple then holds the fork to my mouth. Cautiously, I take the bite, knowing I’ll need the strength to fight him.
“Good, isn’t it?”
My eyes dart to his. I want to beg him to let me go, but I know he won’t, and it only fills me with despair as he continues to slowly feed me.
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