Tornado seemed to remember too. He moved under Leila’s tender touch, it neighed and moved its tail once. Leila exhaled a low laugh, her eyes traveled to Ethan, as if silently asking if he had seen it too.
“I think he recognizes me.” She said, as she crossed her legs by its head.
“Animals are smart and loyal. Tornado loved you, I doubt that changed, even though you were away for so long.”
It was in tender moments like that, when the emotions were stronger than any rational thought, that Ethan found the strength to talk about the past. Leila nodded and smiled sadly guilt flashing over her soft features. If there had been a right moment to open up the subject and follow Alec’s advice, that would have probably been it. But Ethan wasn’t going to ruin such a good moment. He knew that opening such a tender subject was meant to create some tension, who was he to know where it will lead. He didn’t want to risk a fight, not on Tornado’s last day.
“I’ll go grab some carrots.” He said instead. “Do you want anything? I think I have some lemonade in the fridge. That is if Alec didn’t drink it all.”
“No, I’m fine. I had some coffee on my way here.”
Leila watched as Ethan walked towards the barn. She gazed after him, her eyes tracing his broad back and shoulders. He looked almost the same as he did all those years ago. Only a few stubborn white hairs had appeared near his right ear. He found them pleasant to the eye, it gave his natural playfulness a wise taint.
With Tornado in front of her, and Ethan not too far it was almost as if she had never left. The bright Dakotan sun shone upon her, the smell of grass and soil and horses enveloped her, making her feel like home. Yes, for the first time since she had returned, she actually felt like she was home.
That was why she could never replace Ethan. That was why, no matter how far she went or how many people she met, no one could replace him. She had met him when no one even looked her way. He had been her friend and family, he had been her support and shield. He had been her everything for a long while.
“If only I had been stronger. Maybe now you wouldn’t be looking at me with so much holdback.” she whispered, hoping that the breeze would at least carry some of the regret that lay behind the words.
As if her words had called out to him, Ethan exited the barn almost immediately. He held a bucket in hand, and a bag of carrots in hand. He had added a hat to his outfit, one that did not compliment him at all, might she add. Leila couldn’t help but chuckle at how he looked.
“It was a gift from my aunt, okay? Hideous but useful.” he said in defense, his hands raising in the process.
“I bet it’s from Paris too.” she raised both brows.
His aunt was the most extravagant person she knew. She would go as far as traveling to a new city for the sake of a new pair of shoes. Of course, being extravagant and rich didn’t exactly mean you had the tiniest trace of style. The hat on Ethan’s head had been the sole proof of that.
“From Milan, please!” he said, poorly imitating his aunt’s voice.
Leila burst in a fit of laughter, her hair bounced around her neck as she did so. That had been the second where her heart began to fill with happiness. Her body slowly relaxed in the comfort Ethan provided, the day to day worries disappeared without a trace.
“So, you sell horses now?” She eventually asked, after minutes of pleasant silence.
Ethan took a look around him, his eyes resting on the barn, before they diverted back to her. He seemed proud of everything, his eyes shone with the feeling. He smiled slowly and nodded.
“I started buying race horses about three years ago. Of course, it’s more of a hobby to me.” He shrugged. “Do you want to see them?”
“Of course!”
The barn wasn’t like she remembered. Back in the days, it had been an old building, with enough space for two horses. She remembered the chipped white walls, and the hay piles that were spread all over the place. It had been a mess, Ethan hadn’t had the time to renovate the place. Of course, that had changed.
The place was amazing now. The barn hadn’t just been renovated, it was expanded and if she wouldn’t have known any better, she would have guessed it was a new one altogether. The wooden walls were covered with a fresh coat of white dye. Instead of two, there must have been at least ten stalls now, all painted in lively red. The smell of hay was strong, it welcomed her home.
“This place looks amazing!” she exhaled, her eyes moving from one place to another, not finding the time to look at everything.
“I’ve had some time to renovate.” he joked, as he leaned against a wall.
Leila walked among the stalls, taking in the different breeds of horses. She couldn’t name them; her knowledge was very limited. But even with the lack of terms, she could still acknowledge their beauty. Some of them were tall, some shorter, some had long manes were other had them cut short. There were brown and white and black horses. Their fur was luscious, sparkling beneath the streams of light that entered through the windows.
She stopped in front of a cream horse, her hand extending to touch it. The horse immediately reacted to her presence, it lowered its head, as if in approval. Leila smiled and ran a hand through its mane. It was so soft to the touch.
“Do you want to ride?”
Leila turned in a heartbeat, her eyes wide and smile bright. She rose both brows, unsure if she had heard it right. She knew better than anyone that Ethan and she weren’t in the best of relation. So, him offering to do something beyond paperwork meant the ice between them could melt.
In about less than ten minutes, Ethan had prepared the horse and was now leading them both into the riding area. There was no one but them there; the helper she had previously seen was nowhere to be seen. Ethan finally stopped near the entrance, his grip loosening around the bridle.
“Do you still remember how to ride?”
Leila shook her head slowly. She hadn’t touched a horse since she left the country. To her, horses were always associated with Ethan, even coming close to one meant opening up wounds she wasn’t ready to face. Riding a horse on her own, felt like betraying her past.
“Well, Lily here isn’t a wild spirit.”
“I see you got better when it comes to naming horses.” She chuckled.
“Don’t hope for too much. I have a horse that is named Sunshine and the black Friesian you saw, is named Night.”
Leila shook her head in amusement and muffled a chuckle.
“Please refrain from naming any future children.”
“Instead of making fun of me, how about you get your ass on that horse.”
“Impatient as ever, Mr. Hunter.”
Hesitantly, Leila took in a deep breath, looking between Ethan and the high saddle, unsure if she could even climb there. Taking into consideration the lack of elasticity in her legs, she doubted she will be able to climb without struggling. Of course, she had been right. Placing the first leg into the stirrup was easier than swinging the second over the horse’s back. Her first attempt had been a complete failure, she lost her balance and almost fell off of the horse. Almost.
Ethan had been there to catch her. His hands grabbed onto her waist, suspending her in place. For a second, they stayed like that, their bodies leaning on one another, their chests so close that she could almost feel his heartbeat. She didn’t breathe nor move, she simply gazed into his eyes, frozen in place by the familiar feeling that surged through her blood.
Had she not been in an uncomfortable position, with one leg caught between the horse and the other hovering above ground, she would have gladly stayed like that longer. Unfortunately, despite the pleasant emotions, the circumstances were not right, so, she pulled away.
She heard him clear his throat but didn’t dare look at him again. Instead, she focused her attention on the horse. She had somehow managed to climb on the horse, her fingers had tangled in the long mane of the horse. She patted it on the neck the way Ethan had taught her all those years ago. She remembered him
mentioning how important it was for the horse and the rider to get accustomed to one another before any step could be taken.
“Hold tight onto the saddle, I’ll walk with you a bit, after that I’m sure you will start remembering.”
Ethan guided her and the horse, he walked by them silently. Leila was stiff at first, but gradually, her body relaxed. She followed the horse’s moves, her hips rising and falling with each step it took. The feeling was so familiar; her body remembered it almost instantly. She closed her eyes for a second, blindly trusting the horse, but also Ethan.
With her eyes closed, surrounded by darkness, she was one with nature. She felt like she was floating on thin air, bathing in the warmness and shadows that the sun provided. She felt the breeze as it moved past her, whistling by her ears softly. She felt each and every brush of hair that tickled her neck, and the way her limbs moved in sync.
“There, you got the hang of it again.”
She hadn’t noticed until then, but she was riding on her own now. Slowly, she reached for the bridles. Ethan was still walking beside her, his hands now in his pockets, his eyes blinded by the brilliant light.
“Go grab a horse too. I think I can manage from now on.”
*****
The house was lit by dim lights that snaked around the simple furniture. The darkness of the night penetrated through every open window and door crack, fighting the beams of light erupting from the various lamps around the living-room. Everything was silent too, except for the laughs that constantly filled the atmosphere.
The room smelled of beer and pizza, maybe some other snacks too. If anyone would have entered, none would have guessed the two hadn’t been in touched for years. They talked with such ease, the topics flowing between them as if they were meeting for the first time. It was a pleasant scene, that none wanted to wake up from.
“Isn’t Alec coming home tonight?” Leila finally asked, as she stood up.
“I doubt. He has some, um- “Ethan paused for a second tο find a proper word, “Problems he needs to solve.”
Leila felt it from the first day, she knew that Alec had some kind of story. But she didn’t find it appropriate to ask without him being around, so instead, she simply nodded and reached for her purse.
“Well, thank you for everything. I’m happy you allowed me to say goodbye to Tornado.”
“I’m glad you came. He seemed to remember you.” Ethan’s smiled, and walked behind her, slowly guiding her towards the front door.
Silently, Leila walked, but she couldn’t help but notice the pull she felt. One thing was certain, that day had woken up too many feelings to ignore. She felt the needed to spend more time with Ethan, to go back to the good old days, if only for a night. She wasn’t sure that’s what he wanted. Maybe she read too much between the lines, maybe he truly saw nothing but a friend in her now. They were all possibilities -possibilities she ignored the second she turned around.
She didn’t realize what she was doing at first; she had turned on an impulse. Just like him, she had been surprised when she grabbed his face and pressed her lips to his.
At first, Ethan didn’t move, he was frozen in place, his lips paralyzed beneath her touch. But he quickly regained himself. Without as much as a warning, he grabbed her waist and pulled her closer. His mouth molded against hers, moving hungrily.
Their kiss was violent but tender at the same time. It made up for lost time and for the holdbacks they’d experience since reuniting. Through that kiss they spoke words none of them dared utter, they said hellos and goodbyes that they had both longed for so long.
Leila felt like her body was on fire, her blood boiled beneath the thin layer of skin. It called out Ethan’s name; it begged for his touch and longed for more. Shamelessly, Leila acted upon all those urges. She knew how much it will complicate things, but her hands still moved to touch his chest, while her tongue licked his lower lip.
Ethan didn’t hesitate nor did he back away. Instead, he guided her body so that she was now pressing against a wall, the head of his own breath diffusing across her face. She felt his trailing hands and the pressure of his hips as they pressed harder against her.
Suddenly, she gasped for air, her lips lifting off of his for the barest of seconds. She was breathing fast and uneven, her lungs screamed for air, but she couldn’t stop to inhale. With Ethan so close to her, her survival priorities seemed to have shifted. It seemed far more vital to hold onto Ethan and the sparks that erupted between them than to breath.
Soon, their lips were crashing on one another again, their lips indulging in an exotic dance that seemed to call upon their very essence. Leila had tried to find someone else, to bury the hallow she felt after leaving Ethan. She had tried, but never succeeded. No one felt as right as Ethan. No one could set her on blaze the way he did.
“Are you sure Alec isn’t coming home?” She gasped out as he lifted her shirt.
“I’ll kill him if he does.” Ethan whispered against her throat, his gasps fanning the heated skin.
His answer had been enough to reassure her. She lifted her arms to allow him to slide the shirt over them. She shivered once her skin came in contact with the cold touch of the wall. His mouth kissed its way down her neck and to her shoulders, taking a little extra time around her collarbone. She felt his tongue on her back arching as he sucked slowly.
His hand was on her breast, his thumb drawing unknown patterns against the lacy material. She gasped as he squeezed, his fingers trapping her nipple between his knuckles.
Shaky as her hands were, she managed to put them to work and take his shirt off. Her fingers had their own journey; they traced his muscles, giving special attention to his broad shoulders.
“Let’s go to my room.” He breathed out, his eyes boring into hers.
She felt her heart stop in that second. Her soul trembled under his gaze, her entire being surrounded to his mercy. Silently, she followed him, her fingers locked with his. She didn’t know when they finally arrived, but soon enough, she found herself on the bed. Ethan hovered above her. He knelt on the bed, his eyes roaming over her body as his hands went up and down her abdomen. Eventually, they stopped on the waistband.
Slowly, he slid them down her legs, his fingers touching the sensitive skin. She bit her lip and watched him from beneath her lashes. She saw herself in his eyes, her reflection vividly playing between the flames that seemed to burn within his dilated pupils.
Her pants were soon off, his lips taking the place of the material. He kissed his way up her thighs, licking gently her inner thigh. She gasped when his hand reached the outline of her pantie. She felt him tug at it, her attention being divided between so many gestures.
She dug her nails in his back, as she gasped. There was nothing standing between him and her anymore. She felt him touch her sweet spots, his fingers massaging her core as he pressed his lips to hers again. It was hard, but she managed to get rid of his pants as well. She gasped against his lips when she felt his size, her hand struggling to wrap around him.
It had been so long since they’d been together. They had both dream of such a reunion for years now. So, luckily, none of them were up for too much teasing. After long and painful minutes of push and pull games between the two, Ethan finally positioned himself between her legs, his tip poking her entrance.
Slowly, he lowered himself so he could kiss her forehead, his hand caressing her hair before he finally thrust in. Leila felt as if the world was rotating, her body exploded in colors as he rubbed himself against her core.
The pleasure was indescribable, but so was the feeling of finally being able to hold Ethan tight.
Chapter 6
Leila smiled as she stretched her limb under the duvet. The cold parts of it touched her warm skin, making small shivers run through her body. She hadn’t opened her eyes, but she knew the sun was high up in the sky, the shadows that played against her closed eyelids were the soul traitors that whispered of it. She wasn’t sure about the hour, her al
arm hadn’t gone off, so she had either woken up too early, or she had slept through both alarms.
Judging by how she felt, she was more than sure the later was the right option. She didn’t care, though. While on any other day she would have woken up stressed and guilty, this day she was calm. She had finished most of her work already, and luckily, her partner had been the very man responsible for her oversleeping.
At the thought of Ethan, Leila opened her eyes slowly. Her eyelashes fluttered over her cheekbones creating small black patterns. Although she struggled to see through the heavy sleep that still lingered over her eyes, she managed to notice how the other side of the bed was empty.
She placed a hand over the empty sheet and noticed their cold texture. Ethan had been gone for a while. Slowly, Leila rose up. With one hand she held the sheet close to her naked body, while with the other hand she tried to tame some of the wild hair that stuck to her face stubbornly.
In those first seconds after discovering the empty bedside she couldn’t help but panic. Hundreds of scenarios ran through her head. Did he regret it? Did he wake up and realize that she indeed wasn’t worthy of another chance? Did he-
Her trial of thoughts stopped there. She had noticed something beside the pillow, a yellow note, with Ethan’s handwriting scribbled all over the small square. As she picked it up, she couldn’t help but wonder how she didn’t notice it firsthand.
She closed her eyes and opened them again, trying to clear the blur in her vision. When she opened them again, the note had been clear, and so was Ethan’s horrible handwriting. She read the words in a whisper, the words coming out as low breaths rather than clear sounds.
I’m sorry I had to leave. I wanted to say goodbye to Tornado on my own. I’ll be out most of the day, but maybe we can have dinner tonight. Text me your address, I’ll pick you up around eight. I let Alec know you’re here, so he probably prepared breakfast for you.
The Cowboy One Page 5