by Gemma Rogers
When I returned, Karla was already asleep, on top of the covers. I laid a blanket over her and switched on the lamp before getting ready for bed myself. It was barely eight, but I was shattered and laid down to read an old Christopher Pike book I rescued from the boxed-up stuff at Mum’s. Books I read as a kid were always a comfort. Their words taking me back to a better time.
A buzzing sound came from my pillow and I saw Dan had text, checking in to make sure we were okay. I replied we were, and I’d see him tomorrow. I ended the text with a kiss.
I watched Karla sleeping, her eyelids fluttering as she dreamt. I owed her nothing, I’d paid my dues for the life of her brother, so why was I compelled to help? Was Ashley right? Did I have a hero complex? No, it was guilt. If Eddie hadn’t been killed, Karla wouldn’t have been roped into working for Leon. It all traced back to me, back to that night and I couldn’t stand by and watch another life be destroyed. I had to help.
Perhaps if there was money in the safe, it was never Dan’s at all. It could all be Barry’s, he never let on how much money Terry owed him or what it was for. I assumed it was something to do with us girls, getting a cut after he delivered a ‘good’ one, but it was all conjecture and I wasn’t sure we’d ever find out the truth. If Barry’s money was in the safe, it looked like he didn’t know how to get it out. Surely, Dan would know Terry had a safe? What could be inside it? I guess we’d find out if we got in.
When I woke, Karla was wrapped in my towel, a plastic bag over her hand, having just come out of the shower. I was surprised the noise hadn’t woken me up.
‘Where are you going?’ I asked.
‘Work of course.’
I shook my head, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. ‘Why? You’re not much use with only one hand,’ I said.
‘I have my last meeting with Barry today. He’s going to sign me off and I’ll be free. Plus, I’m going to see what’s in that safe if it bloody kills me.’
‘Karla, I’m not sure about this.’
‘What if Dan doesn’t know about the safe, what if Terry never told him? What if the money inside there is what he owed Barry, nothing to do with Dan or Bright’s?’ Karla said, mirroring my thinking.
‘Yeah, but what if it’s not?’
She rolled her eyes at me and sprayed my deodorant under her arms.
‘Help yourself,’ I muttered.
I pulled the covers back, emerging from the bed and scratching my head. I tossed and turned so much, my hair was always a tangled mess when I woke up.
Karla got dressed as best she could one-handed. I had to help her with her bra and the button on her jeans.
‘Is it sore?’ I asked.
‘Yeah, hurts like a motherfucker.’ She grimaced.
‘What time is it?’
‘Half seven. I’ll make tea, go and get in the shower.’
I did as I was told. Once I was dressed and had done my hair, we were ready to go.
Outside, it drizzled and we waited in a corner of the bus shelter to share a cigarette.
‘So, are you going to distract him, and I’ll go in? Or shall we wait until he’s left and do it after hours?’ Either option wasn’t particularly inviting but I didn’t want to lie to Dan’s face if I could help it. Karla was going to try and get into the safe with or without my help and I knew I owed her.
‘I think waiting is better, don’t you? I’m sure there aren’t any more cameras, only the one out the back in the yard, so if we leave via the front door, we should be okay.’ I fidgeted, my stomach fizzing, excited but equally terrified. I’d committed more crimes since coming out of prison than I ever had before I went in, showing the big idea of reform in the justice system didn’t work. This was the last time though, in future I’d stay on the right side of the law, be an upstanding member of society. Once this was done, Karla and I would be even, she’d have a chance at a new start with some money behind her and I’d be able to let go of the demons that haunted me.
‘Sorry, girls, would you mind smoking elsewhere?’ a man in his forties said to us, as our smoke wafted in his face.
‘Oh, fuck off.’
‘Sorry, sure.’
Karla and I spoke at the same time as I dragged her behind the bus stop, hidden by the advertisement, where we were no longer under shelter.
‘I’m getting wet now,’ she complained.
The bus arrived soon after and the man threw Karla a look of contempt as he got on, so, on exiting the bus, she stuck her middle finger up at him whilst blowing a kiss.
When we got into Bright’s, Dan and Barry were having a heated discussion in his office. Barry was gesticulating and Dan shook his head, palms raised up to the heavens. As we passed, Barry stormed out, muttering ‘tosser’ under his breath. Dan had a smirk on his face as he leaned against the door frame.
‘What’s all that about?’ I asked.
‘Money,’ Dan said.
Karla eyes bulged.
‘You owe him money?’ I asked, before Karla could get a word in.
‘Terry does apparently. Ten big ones.’
Karla shuffled off to the lockers.
‘I’m not paying him though,’ Dan said, his voice lower. ‘He won’t tell me what it was for. Well, he says it was an investment, but I think it’s dodgy.’
‘Hmmmm,’ I agreed.
‘Want to get a drink later this week maybe?’ Dan asked as I made my way to the lockers.
‘Maybe. Are the police done with this place now?’ I didn’t mean it to sound like a dig, although Dan looked pained.
‘I’m not sure. Detective Wimslow is popping in this morning to give me an update but nothing was found in the search to my knowledge.’
I nodded, turning away as I cleared my throat, feeling the hair prickle on the back of my neck.
‘You hear all that?’ I whispered to Karla, and she bobbed her head as she struggled to put her tabard on.
‘Oh, Karla, let’s have a chat, yeah, about your duties. We need to look at what you can do without causing any further damage.’ Dan appeared at the narrow entrance to the lockers.
‘Sure,’ she replied and followed him back to his office.
54
I got stuck into a load of hotel sheets alongside Natalia and we chatted about what had been on television; well, she did, I listened. She was amazed when I told her I didn’t own one yet.
‘What do you do when you’re at home?’
‘I read, although I try not to be there too much. It’s one room so can be kind of claustrophobic at times.’
‘I hear you, I’m at my mum’s and in the box room, which is basically the dumping ground for the house. Can’t wait to get my own place one day.’
Karla returned with a clipboard; she’d been tasked with doing a stock check to see what needed ordering. It was nice of Dan to give her something to do. We didn’t get sick pay, so if we didn’t work, we didn’t earn. She rolled her eyes at me, brandishing the clipboard as she disappeared into the store cupboard. Secretly I think she was relieved Dan hadn’t told her to go home. The rest of us were picking up the slack but it was good to be busy.
While we waited for the sheets to finish in the dryer, Natalia popped to the café for a takeaway latte and I headed around to the office. Detective Wimslow filled the doorway, his head nearly touching the top of the frame and the shoulders of his blazer skimming the sides. He was an imposing sight. I moved around to the lockers, catching the end of the conversation.
‘When he’s found, he’ll have a number of alleged offences he’ll be required to assist us with. We’ll keep looking but the tip off in Portsmouth was a dead end and we’ve currently got very little to go on.’ Wimslow’s throaty voice carried and he coughed before continuing.
‘His phone records and financial activity prior to his disappearance don’t appear unusual. There’s no CCTV after him leaving his car in Croydon town centre. We’ve turned up nothing here or at his home and the local hospitals have had no admissions that match his description.’
‘Have you spoken to Kim?’ Dan asked.
‘I’m going to visit her now. I’ll be in touch if anything new comes in and please let me know if Terry tries to contact you.’ They said their goodbyes and shook hands. I came around the corner just as Wimslow was leaving, an ashen-faced Dan staring after him.
‘What’s happened?’ I asked, rushing forwards, but Dan looked at me through absent eyes before turning back into his office and collapsing into his chair. A cold unease seeped into my skin as I waited for him to speak.
‘I can’t believe it. They’ve tracked girls that used to work here. All have the same story, years of abuse, pretty much since we started Bright’s. I can’t even, I can’t get my head around it. Fuck.’ Dan rested his head in his hands. I leant across the desk and wrapped my fingers around his arm, trying to comfort him, my chest heavy.
‘You weren’t to know, Dan. This has nothing to do with you.’
‘What sort of fucking man was he?’ Dan glanced up at me, eyes watery. I chewed my lip. There was no need for me to answer, he knew what sort of man his brother was now.
‘I hope he never comes back,’ Dan said bitterly, standing up and grabbing his coat. ‘I need to get some air, I’ll be back in a bit.’ He rushed straight out of the building without another word and I went back to the warehouse, my legs like lead, wishing I knew how to ease Dan’s anguish.
At lunchtime, Karla and I queued to get a roll at the café. I could tell she was chomping at the bit to confirm arrangements and, feeling the pressure from Leon, I knew she’d want to do it tonight. However, Agnes was in the queue too so we made polite conversation. Clutching our lunch, we hung back in the yard to smoke a cigarette and I watched Karla pace, the gravel crunching beneath her trainers. My mind wandered to Dan, he still wasn’t back.
‘So tonight then. Do you think we should hang back and wait until Dan leaves?’
‘Surely he’d check the place before locking up?’ I said.
‘We can stay in the store cupboard and if he checks, we’ll say we didn’t realise the time.’
‘That’s lame.’ I laughed but it sounded hollow.
‘Got a better idea?’ Karla scowled at me and threw her cigarette to the ground before stomping off.
‘Hey, how’d your meeting go with Barry?’ I called, hurrying after her.
‘He signed me off, but he was a prick about it.’
Karla didn’t have to explain, unfortunately I knew only too well.
I spent all afternoon chewing my thumbnail until it was sore, the skin surrounding it shredded. I struggled to contain my anxiety, unable to avoid multiple trips to the bathroom and blaming the dodgy chicken wrap from the café when the others asked if I was okay. The excuse went with the sheen on my skin from constant perspiration. Karla scowled at me at every opportunity, mouthing at me to get my shit together. She didn’t know I had other things on my mind, not just what she was planning. I thought about telling her to shove it. After all, I was only doing it for her. Just one last thing and then we were done, as far as I was concerned the score would be settled.
When it got to quarter to five and the girls were clearing their stations, preparing to go home, Karla and I slipped inside the store cupboard. We’d got our bags earlier to bring with us in case Dan checked to see if any lockers were still in use. Gradually it grew quieter until we heard lone footsteps come into the warehouse and then leave again. My heart thudded in my ears as we remained still, scared to touch anything and make any noise.
Ten minutes later, I got a text from Dan. He’d only come back to work an hour ago and I hadn’t had a chance to talk to him.
How about that drink? Meant to catch you after work but think I’ve missed you
A door slammed in the distance which sounded like it could be the front entrance. We didn’t emerge from the store cupboard for another ten minutes, just to make sure everyone had left.
‘Reply to him then, make sure he’s gone.’ Karla nudged my arm and my trembling fingers flew across the screen.
Sorry. Hope you’re okay? Tomorrow? X
We listened, but there was no sound, so we crept around the corner, thankful for the little natural light left streaming through Dan’s office window. The sun was setting, and I didn’t want to use a torch. We’d be in and out in five minutes anyway.
‘Okay, let’s hurry. I hope he hasn’t locked the door,’ I said.
Karla tried the handle to the office, and it opened. A rush of endorphins sped through my veins. She hurried forward into the office, whipped the calendar off its hook and threw it onto the desk, bending over to squint at the dial. I leant on the door frame, reluctant to fully enter. Karla didn’t look like she needed much help as she swivelled the dial right, and left, then right again, her tongue stuck out over her bottom lip. I heard her tut and mutter something unintelligible as she tried the dial again. Dots of sweat appeared on my back. Something was wrong.
‘It’s not working!’ Karla said, standing up to stretch her legs, checking the numbers she’d written on her wrist, hidden by the bandage. ‘Fuck’s sake!’ She went back to the dial again as I rubbed the back of my neck. Jittery, like bees were buzzing inside my head.
‘Let’s go,’ I tried, but Karla ignored me.
My phone buzzed loudly, causing both of us to jump. I pulled it out of my pocket, Dan again.
I’m fine. Tomorrow sounds good. Just heading back to the office, left my bloody laptop.
‘Karla!’
She turned immediately, hearing the panic in my voice.
‘Dan’s on his way back,’ I said.
‘Shit!’
I rushed forward and Karla and I both grabbed the calendar, ripping part of it before it fell to the floor. Bending, we knocked heads as we grabbed for it at the same time. Karla awkwardly returning to her feet, waving her bandaged hand around.
‘Let me do it, go and wait by the door. Shout if you hear him.’
Karla did as I asked, and I turned the pages of the calendar back to February. As I did, something caught my eye, a scribble above Kelly Brook’s head on the cover, three numbers 34-26-36. Kelly’s measurements. They had to be written as a reminder. Jesus, Terry was such a sleaze!
I quickly turned the dial and the safe clicked open. Pulling back the door, a large envelope was the only item inside. I grabbed it as I heard Karla call out.
‘I think he’s here, hurry!’
I pushed it closed, spun the dial and returned the calendar at lightning speed before rushing out of the office and closing the door. Joining Karla, we ran back towards the store cupboard, adrenaline coursing through our bodies. A second later, we heard the front door open and faint footsteps.
‘What have you got there?’ Karla whispered as we huddled on the floor of the store cupboard in the dark.
‘Sshhhh,’ I hissed, terrified of getting caught with my hand in the till.
We strained our ears, listening for the main door to be closed again. It came a minute later, but we still held our breath for what felt like an eternity.
‘I think he’s gone,’ I whispered and allowed my body to relax. I crossed my legs and leant back on the shelves, positioning my phone to use as a torch.
‘What did he come back for?’
‘Forgot his laptop apparently. Thank God he mentioned it!’
‘How did you get in the safe?’
‘Numbers were written on the calendar, Kelly’s body measurements!’
Karla pulled up her bandage and I saw she was two digits out from what she’d written on her wrist.
I turned over the envelope and looked at it, then back at Karla. On the front written in black marker was Barry’s name.
‘Told you! It’s Barry’s money that Terry owed him. He must have taken a bit out for something else, gambling probably.’
I stared at the envelope, I’d never stolen anything before I’d been to prison, now I’d done it twice. I wasn’t proud of what we’d done, but Karla needed the money. It was a means to an end.
&
nbsp; Karla rolled onto her knees and leaned over to take the envelope, pulling the opening apart. A wodge of cash sat inside. She gasped and handed it to me to look. I ran my finger over the notes and sucked in air like a marooned fish. It was around the same amount as last time.
Karla sank back on her heels, her body limp, and she sobbed. Shaking with heaving moans, she placed her good hand over her face. ‘I’m free,’ she whispered through snot and tears.
55
Eventually, Karla’s sobs retreated and she looked at me. ‘Let’s go, I’m desperate for a ciggie.’ She hauled herself up.
‘I need a wee,’ I admitted. Still feeling the rush from almost getting caught but equally glad it was over. I handed over the money to Karla. I didn’t want any of it. ‘Let me talk to Dan about somewhere for you to go, he’s been all over the place, he’s bound to know somewhere quiet, where you can disappear. We’re going out for a drink tomorrow, I’ll ask him then.’
‘You two a thing now then?’
I shrugged and Karla grinned, her mood having dramatically improved now.
‘I don’t know.’ It was the truth; I didn’t know where I stood with Dan any more.
We made our way out of the warehouse with a quick stop for me to use the toilet before leaving. For a second, I panicked Dan might have double-locked the door, but the push-release button worked as it always did.
Outside, the sky was full, heavy rain came in sheets and the air was thick with the smell of wet trees.
‘Can I crash at yours again?’ Karla raised her voice over the howl of the wind.
‘Yeah,’ I replied. Where else could she go? At least my place was safe and I could keep an eye on her there. I wanted to check in on Dan but it would have to wait.
The bus stop was deserted, so we smoked freely under the shelter while waiting for the bus to make its way down the road from Croydon town centre. We’d missed the beginning of rush hour and the traffic was free-flowing instead of the usual crawl. I relayed what I’d overheard Detective Wimslow say to Dan which added to Karla’s celebratory mood. It looked like we were in the clear. ‘I fancy an Indian takeaway. Let’s treat ourselves, we deserve it.’ Karla’s eyes lit up as she patted her bag, containing the money. Her whole face had changed, she seemed younger and brighter without the world sitting on her shoulders.