Handsome

by Pinder, Victoria

  I’d prove it.

  29

  Sarah

  Tears streaming down my face and a runny nose were not my best look. At least that's what my family would tell me right now.

  But finally the tears stopped, so when I wiped my face, my cheeks were only stained from the earlier ones.

  I met Cyrus’s gaze and wished I hadn’t told him. Well, not really. He needed to know but talking about the past was like I just took a knife and shoved it into my own gut, leaving me openly bloody and wounded.

  There was no way someone like him would end up with someone like me. I took a few breaths, but then we both heard our phones go off.

  Joshua was awake.

  Cyrus got up and said, “I’ll take a turn with Joshua. Why don't you take a shower, and then we’ll get some rest?”

  Clean myself up. Got it.

  I rubbed my forehead and realized that was a horrible thought, and unfair to Cyrus. He wasn’t anything like anyone else, and he’d given me time to recover while he took a turn with his own son.

  The shower helped my brain and body relax, and it was like the bleeding from my soul had slowed down to a trickle.

  I found a nightshirt and slipped it on, but then I gripped the vanity edge in the bathroom and said to myself, “It has been a long night.”

  As I opened the bathroom door, I heard Cyrus in the other room and Joshua’s happy little noises.

  I held my hand over my heart and said, “We answer to no one… except Joshua.”

  “I’ll be right here if you need me.” Cyrus said to his boy, but it was like he meant for me to hear it, too, through the side door.

  I brushed my hair and sat on the edge of the bed while he rocked Joshua.

  I listened and soon the baby was silent. He must have gone back to sleep.

  His new life would be a far better one, and he’d never remember what my sister once said to him when she’d been drinking. I’d hated leaving to go back to my job because, despite how smart she’d been, Leah never seemed to have much interest in soothing her own baby. I mumbled to myself, “He’s a lucky little boy. My sister had no idea how close Cyrus and his family are. She probably marked him simply because he's so rich.”

  Cyrus’s voice behind me interrupted my musings, “Why are you telling yourself things we already know?”

  I pivoted on the edge of the bed and asked, “You heard me?”

  “Yeah,” he said, and then sat beside me.

  I handed him a glass of water and poured one for myself. He’d been smart to bring up the tray earlier.

  For a minute we sat in silence. Once I finished my glass, the back of my neck still felt hot when I said, “I was feeling guilty because part of me thinks I was using you when I came here.”

  He reached over me and put his empty cup on the tray, saying, “I don’t mind at all, but why would you think that?”

  The bathrobe he wore didn’t hide his muscles at all. I took a deep breath, met his eyes, and decided it was time for the rest of the truth. He now knew my painful past, so it was time to find out where things stood between us.

  My hands shook at my sides, but I plowed on. “I was terribly unhappy, and with you and Joshua I've felt like I have a second shot at being someone I want to be. But it’s still all a lie.”

  His voice was low and soothing. “Or it’s who you’re meant to be.”

  I let out a small, empty laugh and shook my head. “I can’t believe that.”

  He pressed his hand next to mine and said, “You are in charge of your own life.”

  I sucked in my lips and then cupped his face. I refused to ever cry again, but I said, “Well, I can’t promise you anything more than whatever is happening right now. I can’t see a future for myself.”

  He brushed against my arm like we were friends who trusted each other and said, “I can wait.”

  My hair stood on end. He was so rich and could have literally anyone in the world. I swallowed and asked, “Why would you want to?”

  He leaned closer, and his body heat made my entire being clench with longing for him. Only him.

  Then he said, “Because you’re worth it.”

  I glanced down and studied our bare feet. My voice was shaky, but I said, “I’m not ready. I can’t give you anything but sex.”

  There. I finally managed to say it.

  The truth was I hated using people, and it cut to my core to find myself doing it anyway. He now knew why, but without giving him a chance to say anything, I met his stare and said, “Look, I’m not really part of your world. I have more in common with your nameless, faceless staff than with you.”

  His lips met mine and I melted. I curled my arms around his neck and met his passion with my own.

  I uncurled backwards on the bed, and he came with me.

  I was his. He untied his robe. I let him go to lift my shirt off, but when I was naked and ready, and so was he, he kissed my cheeks and said, “I’m making love to you, Sarah. I hope you know that.”

  I arched to give him everything, even if my soul broke inside me, and my orgasm hit fast and hard, breaking through to depths I never knew I had.

  30

  Cyrus

  I took my time with Sarah. I’d never wanted or waited for anyone the way I was doing with her, but there was something hypnotic about our connection. She was funny but direct with me, and her honesty was just one of her charms.

  She was the most captivating woman I’d ever met. And I would never have enough of her.

  When the bathroom door opened a crack, I called out to her, saying, “Come back to bed.”

  She took a deep breath, and her cute breasts went up and down with her breath, and she tiptoed to the edge of the bed and whispered, “It’s almost dawn now.”

  Funny, but she wouldn't let me simply hold her. We didn’t need to burn the sheets up every second, and to help her understand and believe that I patted the mattress right next to where I lay and said, “When it’s time, we’ll get up with Joshua and take him down for breakfast.”

  She sucked on her bottom lip, but then scooted in beside me, saying, “Okay, but I’m not going to sleep much.”

  I adjusted the blanket around her, and her arm pressed against mine, though she was so tense I finally said, “It’s fine. You need to relax.”

  Her eyes were wide for a moment, but then she settled next to me and let her lip free so she could say, “I’ll close my eyes.”

  Cuddling was a small victory. She hugged me and I stayed still. Just having her here made the air smell sweeter, and I was happy.

  I knew when she finally fell asleep because she had a slight snore, a sweet little buzz. I kissed her forehead, but she didn’t move at all.

  I adjusted her hair on the pillow and whispered into the dark room, “You’re sleeping… it’s probably best, but Sarah, you were right about one thing. I always get what I want, and you’re going to be mine.”

  I realized as I let her rest that she already had my entire heart. It wasn’t just in the heat of the moment sex. I was absolutely in love with her.

  31

  Sarah

  A few days later

  Night and day with Cyrus, where all our needs were taken care of while we swam, walked, played garden horseshoes, read to each other, and enjoyed each other and Joshua every second we could, made the prospect of leaving here hard.

  However, the crew finished loading the ship while I rocked Joshua and finished my tea at the makeshift table on the dock.

  The sky was clear, and everything was heavenly. Cyrus had talked on the phone for at least an hour and now paced back and forth on the beach.

  My body lit up like a plugged-in Christmas tree when Cyrus strode across the beach in my direction, and I stood up, holding Joshua like he was my life preserver.

  When Cyrus joined us, I said, “It’s going to be hard to leave.”

  He walked us toward the ship and said, “We can come right back after Warren’s birthday party.”

 
; He hopped on and then helped me, holding me and Joshua tight, like he was ready to protect us from everything. Then he let me go.

  I shaded my eyes from the blazing sun, holding Joshua so it didn't hit him, and said, “I’ll need to handle some business, so it’s okay that our vacation is over.”

  He nodded and then directed the captain to leave port. When he returned to my side he said, “We can go wherever you want.”

  Decisions. I wasn’t even sure if I should stay with him and do my job. I avoided meeting his eyes and said, “I can’t think about that. First I need to deal with the fallout from deaths of my sister and brother.”

  He held the door for me to go inside, away from the heat of the day, and said, “I can have my brother Jeff on point for you with whatever you need.”

  “The lawyer?” I asked as it was hard to remember which one was which, even after hearing a lot of his stories.

  He nodded, and my skin cooled from the air conditioning while he said, “It makes it easier to coordinate the paperwork.”

  Joshua started making noises and we both ran to the galley to grab a bottle.

  Cyrus hovering near me made me wonder if he wanted to rescue me or if he truly loved me.

  I wasn’t sure, but I refused to ask, and instead said, “I’d like that. More time to spend with Joshua.”

  His phone rang. He tensed like it was important but handed me the bottle from the fridge as he said, “And once everything is sorted out, we’ll figure out where to go next.”

  Good. Making decisions wasn't one of my top skills, especially right now, since I wasn’t sure if I was free to love him, or if I’d end up staying and eventually becoming my mother or my sister.

  We started back to the main room as I put the bottle in Joshua’s mouth, though I whispered, “This morning I thought about telling you I was leaving.”

  While we returned to the main room of the yacht, where we spent most of our days, he said, “I’m glad you started in the past tense, but can I ask why?”

  We left a day earlier than expected to avoid a brewing storm, but my pulse spiked right now, and I wasn’t sure how to calm down as I said, “Because maybe I’ve been living in hiding for so long that I don’t know what I feel or want. So I’m working on it.”

  His phone rang. He took it out of his back pocket and said, “Let me know if I can do anything to help.”

  I needed to sort out my head and my heart. I shook my head and said, “Oh you’ve done more than enough.”

  Then he showed me his phone and asked, “Can you get Joshua settled on the ship? I’ll be right outside for a few minutes.”

  “You can count on me,” I said, and curled into the seat near the window where we’d had sex before going onto the island. The memory replayed in my mind as he walked out of this room and into the one where we danced.

  I needed to clear my head too and figure out how to move on from my past. Maybe then I’d be able to figure out how I feel about Cyrus, other than knowing he's a handsome, a total sweetheart, and everything I’d ever want in a man.

  32

  Cyrus

  For days now I’d been reaching out to my entire family concerning Darren Davis. He’d never make a dime from us or anywhere my family continued to do business.

  Blacklisting took longer than I assumed, but at this point all the man’s windows of opportunity were closing.

  My brother had been hard to get ahold of, so when Warren called, I knew I needed to take his call.

  The first few minutes were just a rehash of his plans, but then the said, “I ordered myself furniture and set up some jobs for when I get to North Carolina.”

  Being a heart surgeon meant I trained myself to step back from my feelings and be hyperaware of the present moment. With my clients I always did everything in my power to help them avoid surgery, if possible, which made my approach a novelty for some.

  However, I’d been using that training for days now to slowly excise Darren from our lives. And Warren was one of the last pieces.

  For now, I kept the conversation about him, and asked, “And Maman and Pedar know?”

  “I requested the time off at work, so he’ll be tipped off.”

  My shoulders tensed. If Pedar had no access to computer, I’d have to wait until he got home, though I nodded and said, “Finding yourself is important.”

  Warren then said, “Well, before I go, I did as you asked. Darren Davis is divested of all Norouzi investments, and he’s blacklisted from ever using our firm again.”

  I let go of the breath I’d been unconsciously holding and said, “Good.”

  “Can you tell me why now?”

  I hadn't asked for or been given permission to discuss what Sarah shared, and Warren was the first one who asked. I tugged on my earlobe and chose my words carefully, “He… hurt Sarah in the past.”

  “That’s all you said before too. Look, since we’re all blocking the guy now, I hope it’s because we’re ensuring that you and Sarah get to live happily ever after.”

  Step one of ensuring she’d never again even see the man who abused her without her consent was now complete. If she chose to press charges, she’d have the advantage every weapon I had in my arsenal, because I was positive, she wasn’t his only victim. However, it was her choice and I only said, “It’s complicated, but we don’t want to ever do business with Darren Davis’s kind.”

  “What did you do?” Sarah asked from behind me.

  I turned around and she walked closer to me. “I ensured he has been barred from ever conducting business with or even near any of my family ever again.”

  Her face went white. She pressed a hand to her chest and said, “So you’re protecting me?”

  I rubbed the back of my head, unsure about the best way to answer, but then I shrugged and said, “We don’t do business with bad people—not when we know about it, anyway as we need to protect my family from potential criminal liability. And if I saw him ever, I’d be tempted to murder him for what he did to you.”

  She shook her head but gazed out at the ocean as she said, “You’re a good guy who couldn’t hurt anyone, but you don’t always have to save me. I can take care of myself.”

  This wasn’t about saving her. I put my hands in my pockets and said, “One of Pedar’s rules is that we use our money to ensure good things happen and avoid anyone who might do or cause negative things. He said happy circular money ensures we continue to have plenty of it.”

  She looked at me but didn't quite meet my gaze as she said, “Well, money has never been happy or circular in my world, but I think you'll want to come inside and have some water and the fun-looking snacks that were just delivered.”

  Neither of us moved. I inched closer to her until I could feel her nearness without either of us touching as I said, “And now you’re taking care of me.”

  Her face pinkened and she sauntered inside, flipping her hair behind her shoulders, and saying, “Nah I just like when you stare at my ass, Handsome.”

  “Well, that is a bonus,” I said, and stared at her ass.

  I wasn’t sure how to convince her that what was happening between us was good, or how to keep her safe without insulting her.

  I’d just have to try harder, because I needed her with me and my son, forever.

  33

  Cyrus

  We finished eating outside and moved back into the main room. My son was wide awake, and while Sarah rocked him, I began to notice the way Joshua had begun to bond with her while they cuddled.

  I glanced out the window and straightened in surprise. Wow. I told the captain we needed to get back fast, and we had a powerful engine, but I was still impressed when I saw the familiar shoreline coming into view.

  We settled onto the seats, and I pointed to the house in the distance. Her eyes widened and she asked, “We made it back faster than on the way to your island?”

  Joshua wailed like I was taking Sarah away from him.

  I rubbed my hand on her back and glanced
down at her as I said, “We have a good tailwind, and I wanted to get home a day before the family arrives. This way you’ll have time to handle whatever you need without dealing with paperwork.”

  My son's cries escalated to screams.

  “Good plan,” she said, raising her voice a bit.

  She maneuvered him again to see if he had gas.

  I glanced down at her when my son clutched my finger. He quieted just from having her attention. I winked at him but then gazed back at Sarah. I wondered if she’d ever go out on a real date with me.

  She might need the dinner and flower moments, and I’d be happy to give her whatever her heart desired. However, I kept still, because every time we talked, Joshua screamed.

  When we were finally off the ship and back on land, his cries went into a lull, and it was starting to look like he preferred to be held tight. He probably thought of Sarah as his mother since she was the one who took care of him.

  I hoped that when I asked her out, she'd agree, because it would mean she was emotionally ready to acknowledge that we have a relationship. She wasn’t there yet, even though I was.

  I opened the front door, and the air conditioning blasted us with cool air, and as I closed the door, my son immediately quieted.

  We headed right to the kitchen for a bottle as I said, “And it seems Joshua likes being inside the house.”

  “He’s a smart one,” she said and gaze him a hug. I took out a bottle and placed it in his mouth. She took over, and we returned to the main room.

  She hummed while he fed, and soon Joshua fell asleep.

  Finally. He’d be out for a while now because it seemed like he’d been up for hours.

  I took him and carried him up to his nursery, laying him down gently so he wouldn't wake up. She followed, and as we returned to the main room, I closed Joshua's door behind us.