by Logan Jacobs
“Yes, yes I did,” Grizz finally admitted and hung his head.
“Right you did,” Artie huffed and then winked at him. Grizz grinned back at her. Sometimes they acted like an old married couple and it was incredibly endearing.
“Whew, sugars, that was something else,” Aurora drawled and poured herself into one of the comfortable lounge chairs that surrounded the table. She kicked one shapely alabaster leg over the armrest in a way that was decidedly not lady like, and I felt my loins stir once again. It took an extreme force of will not to take her by the hand and go bang the crap out of her right at that moment, but the chairs we were in were incredibly comfortable, and I needed a respite after that match. We used to have stuffy executive office chairs but after one of our last matches, I’d used some credits we’d won to give us these cool futuristic Barkalougners.
“Yeah, I was pretty sure we were done for at a few points in time,” Tempest said as she sat down as well.
“I wasn’t,” I replied like a scoundrel.
“You never are, sugar,” Aurora said. “It’s part of your infuriating charm.”
“Infuriating, huh?” I said and shot her the best sexy look I had. I hoped it was sexy anyway. For all I knew I could have looked like I was constipated. She blew me a little kiss from her full, sensual lips, so I guessed it worked okay.
I was going to say something incredibly witty, but just then the door to our gym slid open, and a five foot tall, slightly balding, little blue alien with two bulbous antennae poking out of his head walked into the gym with a pallet full of weapons hovering off the ground behind him.
“Chaz!” everyone shouted as if we were in Cheers.
“There’s my little blue buddy,” I yelled and shot out of my chair to go give the grinning alien a hug. “I missed you, you munchkin. Where the hell have you been?”
“Not as much as I missed you, Marc,” Chaz said in a voice that was not unlike Charles Boyle from Brooklyn Nine-Nine.
He was a member of a race of aliens that had both telekinetic and psychic abilities, hench why he was able to move the large pallets of gear without breaking a sweat. They had a tendency to drive others a little nuts with their zest for friendship so they would bond with folks psychically. Whenever the little dude was around, it felt like we’d been best friends forever. At first it was a little weird, but I’d grown to like it. I messed up the black hair that was in a weak comb over on the top of his head.
“Yeah, Chaz, where have you been?” Artie reiterated.
“Well, if I am being honest, I was on a torrid sexual tryst with that hostess from the club a few weeks ago,” he said as his cheeks blushed. “She got wind of my exploits with Marc and the President in the Red-Light district against the Skalle Furia and well, let’s just say we indulged in all the pleasures. It was awesome.”
“Good for you,” Nova said hesitantly. “I think.”
“Oh, it was good for both of us multiple times, Nova Qwark,” Chaz responded with excitement. “Even simultaneously on a few instances.”
“That is more information that I ever wished to know about your carnal adventures,” Grizz said with a grimace.
“Oh, I’m willing to tell you more if you want,” he continued, completely missing the sentiment of Grizz’s statement. “We did this thing called a Torbollian Pile Drive that had--”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa, there buddy,” I cut him off much to the relief of everyone else in the room. “Leave some things to the imagination, okay?”
“Sure, your loss though, I am incredibly flexible,” Chaz smiled, and then noticed Tempest as she turned around in her chair. “Oh, wow! Tempest Dirk! Are you part of Team Havak now?”
“Yup, sure am, who are you?” She smirked at him, not sure quite what to make of the over eager blue alien.
“Chaz, I’m Chaz, people call me Chaz,” he stammered. “I’m a huge fan of yours and hated you in an alliance with Hann-Abel. Your poster will go back in a place of prominence in my Shrine Room.”
“Thank you? I think?” Tempest said.
“You have a shrine room?” Nova asked.
“Oh yeah,” Chaz grinned. “I have all your posters in there. Also I keep up with your stats, and all your various fan clubs. I even moderate a few.”
“That’s good to know, sugar,” Aurora drawled and gave Chaz a hug. “Good to see you.”
“It’s always a joy to be nestled between your soft, bountiful breasts, Aurora Starfall,” Chaz said, his voice a little muffled from actually being smushed into Aurora’s boobs.
“I know, that’s why I do it,” she responded, gave him a little kiss on the cheek, and then went over to the pallet of gear he’d brought in. “What do you have for us from Darry today?”
“Oh, yeah, gosh, that’s totally why I’m here, isn’t it?” He muttered self-reproachfully. “Okay, everyone got upgrades on their armor that will give more protection from energy weapons. Darry tweaked your Val’Keeyre pack, PoLarr and you should get more thrust without losing maneuverability.”
“I do love a good thrust,” PoLarr said and winked at me. “Thanks, Chaz.”
“Darry’s the real genius here,” Chaz said reverently.
“Indeed he is, Chaz,” Grizz agreed.
“Oh, right, shoot, I almost forgot,” Chaz said to the big holographic trainer. “Darry’s going to call in a bit. Wanted to talk about a few things.”
“Huzzah,” Grizz boomed. “A nice palaver with an old friend will do me good after all this nonsense. Let’s get back to the weapons.”
“Got it,” Chaz said and picked up a sleek, futuristic assault rifle. “Here you go, Marc. Darry was able to fix your Eradicator and even managed to tweak the bolt action for a smoother cycle rate.”
“No way!” I yelled excitedly. During the Amazing Death Race, at least that’s what I’d dubbed it, on Cruxia a few weeks ago the gun had been nearly cut in half by a NecroWraith named Vex. I killed him for it but I thought the gun was a goner which had bummed me out to no end. The rifle had been with me since my very first encounter as Earth’s champion. Artie and I had crashed on a moon overrun by reanimated demon corpses. We’d survived by the skin of our teeth, thanks to the incredibly intuitive rifle.
I held it in my hands and checked out the repairs. They were so minute so as to be barely noticeable. Had I not known where exactly it had been cut I wouldn’t have even been able to tell. I flicked a switch, and the guns purple triangle laser sight blazed bright on the wall of the gym. I racked the bolt a few times and dry fired it.
The action was smooth as freshly shaved legs on a super model and felt equally good in my hand. Not that I’d ever had a freshly shaved supermodel leg in my hands, but what I had was five times better than any model, and a grin spread across my face as I glanced around the room at the bevy of strong, smart, gorgeous, different, warrior women who I was damn lucky to have as part of my team. And even luckier to have had share my bed.
I flipped another switch, and the gun hummed in my hand and transformed like, well, like a Transformer, into a shorter carbine version of the rifle with a shorter barrel and collapsible stock. “Oh yeah, hail to the king baby.”
“Since when are you a king?” Nova scoffed.
“In the bedroom,” I shot back, full of cocksure arrogance. It may be cliched, but the gun made me feel kinda badass. Silly, and full of all kinds of stupid male machismo, but, I was kind of full of stupid male machismo at the moment.
“Hail to the king, indeed,” Nova acquiesced and smiled seductively. Winning a match always sent everyones’ libidos into overdrive.
“Uh-uh, sugar, it’s my turn,” Aurora cajoled.
“Fair enough, Aurora, I don’t want to be greedy,” Nova admitted. “Actually I do, but fair is fair.”
“I have come up with a spreadsheet schedule if anyone is interested,” Artie chimed in on the conversation. “Time is a finite resource in this plane of existence, and it would probably be a good idea for us to plan our private time.”
&nb
sp; “Hey, hey, slow your roll there, Big Love,” I grumbled. I mean, she was probably right, but it still felt odd. Kind of routine in a weird way. “I’m not just some piece of man meat to be bandied about.”
“Yes you are,” Tempest smirked at me. “Bandied means fucked till you are sore, right?”
“Um, uh, no,” I stammered and felt heat rise in my cheeks.
“Don’t worry, Marc,” Artie said and kissed me on one of my very red, hot cheeks. “We’ll take care of it so you don’t have to worry. We’re grown up independent ladies. Nothing weird about it.”
“Okay, if you say so,” I said shyly.
“I do,” she replied and squeezed my butt before going back over to the Command Center.
Thankfully, just then our gyms holo-phone trilled with an incoming call.
“That must be Darry,” Grizz said. Artie tapped a few keys on her console and a five and a half foot tall praying mantis materialized in front of us. He wore a thick work apron stained with grease and had a mangled, half chewed cigar in his mandibles.
“Team Havak, how the hell are you all, you ugly sons of bitches?” Darry asked in a gruff, odd, but not unpleasant clicking voice.
“That’s rich coming from you, you chitinous slob,” Grizz shot back with a big grin on his face. Grizz had been very good friends with Darry’s father long ago during his time as champion and had known the sentient bug for his entire life.
“Haha, nice one, Grizz,” Darry laughed. “How are you liking the upgrades?”
“Master Dar’Tor, they have exceeded all expectations,” Nova said reverently. “The weapons forgers on Paladin Prime could certainly learn a thing from you.”
“Nonsense,” Darry said and waved her comment off humbly with his big clawed forearm. “Paladinian forgers are some of the best in the galaxy. My father had me apprentice with them for a decade when I was a young bug.”
“I had no idea,” Nova said, both shocked and impressed.
“Why would you, sweetie,” Darry said. “Unlike this big oaf, I don’t go around bragging about everything I did from heroic slaughter to bowel movements.”
“My bowel movements are legendary and have no less than four epic poems written about them,” Grizz countered.
“Point proven,” Darry chuckled.
“To what do we owe the honor of this call?” Grizz asked.
“Well, one, I wanted to see how all the gear was performing,” Darry replied. “And two, I had to fire a client so I’ll have even more time to spend on my favorite alliance.”
“That’s great, Darry, thank you,” I chimed in. Darry always managed to find time for us, but sometimes his weapon deliveries came down to the wire. If we had more of his undivided attention that could only help Team Havak.
“Eh, it ain’t nothin’, kid, I like you guys a lot,” Darry said with a chuckle. “Besides, that other client was a dick head.”
“What happened, Darry?” Grizz asked, concerned. “You don’t fire clients lightly.”
“No, I don’t,” Darry explained. “But these guys were class-A jerks and wanted me to cheat.”
“Oh, no they didn’t?” Artie accused.
“Oh yes they did, Artemis,” Darry continued. “They asked me to make some illegal mods to their gear and weapons that would most undoubtedly give them an unfair advantage. I understand the Crucible is a cruel mistress, hell I get that more than most, but I don’t cheat. My old man taught me a lot of things in his long life and that was one of them. You live and die by your reputation, and I won’t sully the name of my father and his father before him by cheating. So, I told them to go take a long walk off a short bridge.”
“You are an honorable man, Darry, and your father would be very proud of you,” Grizz said reverently.
“Thank you, Grizz,” Darry accepted the compliment with a nod of his triangular head. “That means a lot coming from you. I take it Chaz delivered everything.”
“Yup, right here, boss,” Chaz chirped.
“I don’t know how many times I have to tell you, Chaz, you don’t work for me,” Darry shook his head and wiped his insectile face with one of his claw hands in exasperation.
“Semantics,” Chaz waved Darry’s point away.
“Okay, then, you can have the afternoon off,” Darry finally acquiesced. Chaz could be very persuasive even without his psychic abilities. “I’ve got some new ideas for a particle pistol that I’m going to spend the day tinkering with. You should come over this weekend, Grizz. We can drink and tell old stories.”
“That would make my old warrior soul sing with joy,” Grizz said as a huge, warm, smile spread across his face.
“No singing,” Darry commanded jokingly. “You have a horrible singing voice. Alright, well that’s it for me. Talk to you all later.”
“By, Darry, and thanks again,” I said and waved as the insect's holographic form melted away.
“I sing fantastically,” Grizz grumbled. “In fact I shall regale you all with a song about my third match that the bards on my homeworld wrote after the occasion. It is four hours long--”
“We will take your word for it, big guy,” I interrupted him before he could launch into it. Once he started there was literally no stopping him unless we turned off his holo-projector. And even that was no guarantee. “Besides, it’s time for your blowing off steam session with some good food and a movie.”
“Oh, I had a suggestion for tonight, Marc,” Chaz said excitedly.
“Okay, shoot,” I said curiously.
“My nephew’s uncle’s step-mother on my grandfather’s side is opening a new Earth themed establishment in the Earth District,” Chaz rattled off.
“Earth District?” I asked.
“Yeah, Earth interest is huge right now,” Chaz explained. “Huge.”
“Well, I’m game,” I said with a shrug. “What’s the place like.”
“I believe it’s called a Roller Rink?” Chaz said.
“Shut the front door,” I spouted out.
“Marc, the front door is not open at the moment,” Artie said matter-of-factly.
“I’ll explain that one later, Artie,” I said and then looked right at PoLarr and then we spoke at the same time, “Boogie Nights.”
“What are ‘boogie nights’?” Tempest asked.
“It is probably a movie,” Aurora explained as she rolled her eyes.
“Oh, yeah, it’s a movie,” I started to explain excitedly. “It’s about Seventies porn stars, but that’s irrelevant, it is mostly about sweet tight polyester pants, awesome music, gold chains, and getting funky.”
“And drugs,” PoLarr added.
“Well, yeah, but we’ll skip that part,” I said and then turned to Artie. “Get Woodhouse on the line. I already know what everyone is going to wear, and I need to get him started on making it all.”
“What foolishness are you blathering on about?” Grizz asked, but I could tell he was interested.
“Oh, you’re coming, Grizz,” I commanded my bare chested six-and-a-half-foot tall two-hundred-and-fifty pound trainer. “And you are going to dig it the most. ‘Cause I’m going to take you all to funky town.”
Chapter Five
The million square mirrors on the huge disco ball that spun above the polished wood over the large oval roller rink caught the light from a hundred multicolored LED and laser lights and reflected and refracted them times a thousand and cast a myriad of color across the dark interior of Wonderland Skate Park.
Megawatt speakers hung from all four corners of the rectangular box that was the interior of Wonderland and pumped out “Boogie Shoes” by KC and the Sunshine Band at ear-splitting decibels just as my posse and I walked through the front doors like conquering kings.
We looked hot as hell too.
Woodhouse had outdone his robotic self and gotten the outfits I’d described to him in record time, and we resembled some kind of star-studded crew going to suck the marrow out of the nightlife at Studio 54. It took a little convincing on my
part to get everyone on board because in any other circumstances we would look utterly ridiculous but not in this place and not tonight.
To my right, as always, as we spread out into a loose V formation, was Artemis. She was resplendent in a skin tight, short-sleeved, denim bodysuit that left very little to the imagination. It was unbuttoned down past her cleavage and in true Seventies fashion she wasn’t wearing a bra. None of the ladies were this evening, which was just alright with me. Her hair was done in loose pigtails, and a gold Aquarius medallion hung just above the valley of cleavage created by the pert mounds of her breasts.
To my left stood Nova, and she looked all kinds of superfly fine. Since her body was more muscular than most of the ladies in the swinging Seventies, I decided to go with a Rhinestone Cowboy motif. She wore a slightly undersized pearl snap western shirt that was tied at her midriff instead of buttoned up and showed off her magnificent tits in spectacular fashion. A tight, cutoff pair of Daisy Dukes covered her delicate bits, but could barely contain the round, muscled, yet still wonderfully curvy slope of her amazing ass. High-heeled cowboy boots covered her feet and a straw cowboy hat finished off the ensemble. She stood with her hip cocked and her hands resting on the S shape of her waist as if looking to see who she was going to fight.
PoLarr was just to her left and slightly behind and fairly glowed like a rockstar in the spotlight in a virgin white one piece pant suit that ended in fake diamond covered high heel pumps. It had a neckline that plunged all the way to her pubic bone and was sheer enough that the hard nubs of her nipples poked out like an enticing promise of pleasure yet to come. Her normally spiky hair-do was laid flat and swept to the side like Streisand in Funny Girl, and her big, round blue eyes were accentuated with dark eyeliner and light blue eyeshadow with bright red lipstick on. A big, bright, diamond necklace brought multicolored focus to her wonderfully perky breasts. I’d actually patterned the look after the Seventies version of the Marvel character, Dazzler, and I’d done a damn fine job if I did say so myself.