“I’m fine,” I say and look everywhere but at him. “You are needed on the set,” I tell him while I stand here looking at the exit sign over the door.
“Erin.” He says my name, and I want to look at him and tell him to fuck off. But I don’t have the chance to because Jennifer approaches us out of breath.
“Ivan is waiting on set for you,” she says and then looks at both of us. “I have the cart over there.”
“Why don’t you go to the trailer and lie down?” he suggests, and then I snap my head around and look at him. I expected him to look guilty, to keep from looking me in the eye, but no, his face is the same. Like he wasn’t just fucking someone in there.
“No, thank you,” I tell him, then turn to Jennifer. “We should get to the set.” I walk ahead of her, and she follows me, looking over her shoulder to make sure that Carter is following her. I get into the back of the golf cart. Thankfully, my back is to Carter so I don’t have to look at him. Jennifer drives us to the stage, and I wait for him to get off the cart before I get up, but he waits for me there.
He reaches out his hand to put it on my shoulder. “Are you sure you’re okay?” I move out of his touch, his arm falling to his side.
“I’m fine.” One word, brokenhearted. I quit, another two words that run through my mind. You’re fired, the final two words that I know I’ll hear from Sylvia. I sit in the chair and watch him act in the scene, but the only thing running through my head is who did he sleep with. I look around at the crew and wonder which one it was. I get up softly and quietly and walk out of the stage door. I grab a golf cart and make my way over to where the car is. I pick up my phone and try to get an Uber here, but it’s almost as if I’m cursed because nothing shows up.
“What are you doing out here?” I turn to see Mandy walking into the parking lot, holding a cigarette in one hand and a coffee in the other.
“I’m trying to get an Uber,” I tell her, and she laughs.
“Good luck,” she says, lighting her cigarette and taking a long inhale. “I tried to get one for an hour yesterday.”
“Shit, what about cabs?” I ask her, trying to pull up one when I see a town car come into the parking lot. He stops at the front door, and I see that it’s someone who stars in the movie. I know I should know, but right now, I don’t know anything.
Benny’s behind the wheel, so I know that luck is on my side. “Benny,” I say loudly, and he turns around and smiles.
“Thank you for your help,” I tell Mandy and then walk to Benny.
“I know that you just finished, but I can’t get a cab or an Uber,” I tell him. I’m about to get on my knees and beg him to just take me away from here.
“Of course, Miss Erin.” He opens the back door, and I get in, and for the first time today, I breathe a sigh of relief. “Back to the house?” he asks, and I want to say no. I want to tell him to take me to the airport.
“Yes. Please,” I say and look out the window as he makes his way back to the house. My phone buzzes in my bag, but I don’t even bother taking it out. It buzzes and then stops and then buzzes again. When we pull up in front of the house, I get out and thank Benny over and over again. I walk to the door and put in the code. Walking up the stairs and straight to my room, I sit on the unmade bed, kick off my shoes, and think about my next move. I get up and enter the closet and bring my luggage out and start to put the dirty clothes away. I’m halfway from the closet with my clothes in my hand when I hear the front door slam shut and his boots stomping up the stairs. I get ready for whatever is going to come, but I’m not ready for it. Nothing can make me ready for him.
His eyes find mine and then go to the bag on my bed and then to the clothes in my hand. He stops to catch his breath. His eyes look almost crazy and ravished, and then they turn to anger. “What the fuck are you doing?” he roars, and I just stand here looking at him, shaking my head.
Chapter Seventeen
Carter
“Where is Erin?” I ask Jennifer once I walk off the set. I searched for her when she walked out of her bedroom this morning, and when I saw her, I swear I about came in my pants. She was the reason I woke up at three a.m. with my cock so hard it only took me three pulls before I came.
“I have no idea,” she says and walks away. I walk out of the stage and go to a golf cart. I get to the stage and see Mandy coming back in.
“Have you seen Erin?” I ask her, hoping to fuck someone has seen her. She looked so pale before I almost shut down today and took her home.
“Yeah, she just left,” she says, bringing her coffee to her lips. “I think Benny took her home. She was looking for an Uber.” I run past her and get into the car, peeling out of the lot. Jesus, she is all alone and sick. What if she faints, and no one is there? I try not to think of anything bad. But I can’t help it. What if she’s throwing up and needs someone to hold her hair back? I make it to the house in record time, leaving the keys in the car. Walking into the house, I slam the door behind me. When I get to her room, the fear of her being sick leaves me when I see her standing there with her luggage on the bed and her clothes in her hand.
“What the fuck are you doing?” I roar, the fear leaving my body as the fury comes in. I know I should go in softly, that I shouldn’t just pounce, but I just had a heart attack, thinking of her sick and alone, and she’s here packing her fucking bags. “What the fuck is going on?”
“I’m . . .” she says as she dumps her clothes in the luggage, and I have the need to jump over the bed and take them out. “I’m organizing my stuff,” she says, but she doesn’t make eye contact. In fact, she hasn’t looked at me once today.
“Look at me.” I stop moving in the middle of her room, and she stops with her back to me. “Turn around and look at me.” I see her hand on her head and then she turns around, and I see her eyes for the first time. She looks like she has been crying or that she wants to cry. I walk to her and stop when she takes a step back. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” she says, and I know she is lying. I can feel it, and I can see it.
“You’re lying,” I say to her, and she looks at me. “Tell me.” It’s almost a whisper.
She puts her hand in front of her, holding both hands together when she looks at me. “I heard you,” she says, and I look at her, confused. “I heard you,” she says, her voice going a touch louder, and I hear anger in it.
“Okay,” I say, putting my hands on my hips. “You heard me.”
“Yeah,” she says, and her softness is gone and in its place is her sass. “I heard you.”
“So you’ve said already,” I say. “Heard me what?”
“Oh, cut the bullshit,” she says, putting one hand on her hip that she cocks. “Don’t make me spell it out for you.”
I put my hands up. “You are going to have to because I have no fucking clue what you’re talking about.”
She rolls her eyes at me. “You don’t have to lie or pretend.”
“I swear on my life I have no fucking idea what you’re talking about, so just spit it out.”
“Fine!” she yells, and I see the pain in her eyes. “I heard you having sex in your trailer earlier,” she says, and I take a step back like she slapped me across the face. She looks at me as I stare at her with my mouth hanging open. “Yeah, that’s right. I heard you. So you can stop with the stupid act.”
“You heard me having sex in my trailer,” I say softly, my stomach sinking. “You heard me having sex in my trailer.” I repeat the words to make sure that is what she said.
“Yes,” she says. “I came to get you, and I heard you, okay?”
“What did you hear?” I ask, and now my knees feel weak. I look around and think to myself why aren’t there any chairs around that I could sit on.
“I didn’t hear anything. I heard you moan and groan,” she says. “Does it even matter?”
“It matters to me because I wasn’t in my trailer having sex with anyone,” I tell her softly, and she looks at me. “I sw
ear, I was in my trailer, but I wasn’t with anyone.”
“I heard you,” she says, and I laugh, relief suddenly washing over me.
“You heard me masturbating,” I tell her. “Jesus.” I rub my face.
“What?” she whispers.
“You left the trailer, and all I could see in my head was your perfect ass walking away, and well,” I tell her, looking down and then up again, “Erin, you have no fucking idea the power you have over the male species. No fucking idea.”
“What?” she repeats now, not moving from where she is.
“You really don’t see it,” I tell her. Looking her up and down, I feel my cock suddenly wake again. “You ooze sex, Erin. You don’t have to even try, it’s just there. I mean, after the hike, I had to take a shower and jerk off to a picture of you bending over wearing fucking Billy boots.”
She shakes her head, and I walk to her now. She doesn’t move back. She stands there, and I put my hands on her hips. With her heels off, she is shorter than me, her head reaching me just above my lips. “I woke up this morning at three,” I say in a whisper, and she looks up at me. My hands move on their own, and one cups her cheek. “Ever since we’ve met, you’ve been in my dreams.” My thumb rubs her cheek back and forth. “Tell me that this isn’t one sided.” I hold my breath, waiting for her to answer. “Tell me that it’s not just in my head.” My other hand moves up to her cheek.
Her hands grab my wrists, and I think she is going to pull my hands from her face. “It’s not just you,” she says in a whisper, and I take the biggest leap of faith I’ve ever taken when I lean my head down and crush my lips to hers. She moans out and leans into me. Her hands leave my wrists and move down my arms to my shoulders.
My hands go to her hips again, and I pull her flush to me. When she feels my cock, she gasps, and I take that time to slide my tongue into her mouth. And it’s like heaven, or like I’ve died and gone to heaven . . . but either way, I’m there, and she’s right there with me. Her tongue slides with mine, going around in a circle round and round. My hands finally find the reason for my outburst this morning when they reach her ass. Her plump, perfect ass and I swear it feels so much better in both my hands. Her hands move from my shoulders to my hair, and the kiss that started off soft now gets more frantic. My hands go from her ass to her back up to her neck, and I bury my hands in her hair. Tugging her back a bit, I pull her lips from mine and bend to devour her neck. I kiss her softly at first and then stick my tongue out right before I suck in. She presses her pussy into me. My cock wants to come out and play, and her hands go to my shirt. She unbuttons the buttons and finally loses patience and just rips it apart. Seeing me with my shirt open down the middle, she leans in and kisses a pec softly, and I step away from her. My willpower is stronger than I ever thought possible. But the look of hurt across her face brings me to a standstill.
“What are you doing?” she asks, reaching out with both hands to grab my shirt and bring me back.
“If I don’t stop right now, I’m going to throw you on that bed,” I tell her the truth, looking at her and seeing her smirking, “and as much fun as that sounds, I don’t want to rush you into it.”
“You aren’t rushing me into anything, Carter,” she tells me, getting on her tippy toes now to kiss my neck the same way I kissed hers but biting me harder than I bit her.
“Erin,” I groan when she nips my lower jaw. “You have no idea how little self-control I have right now.”
“I really wish you wouldn’t be cautious right now,” she whispers, and I step away from her hands because if she touches me even a little, all bets will be off, and I don’t want her to regret anything with us.
“I’m doing this more for you than for me,” I tell her, and she looks at me, tilting her head sideways. “If I take you now, you will wake up with nothing but regret.” She doesn’t say anything; she just looks down and then her eyes come up. “You will regret that we just rushed into things,” I say softly. “I don’t want to be a regret.” I shake my head. “Not with you.”
She walks to me, and I’m mesmerized by her. “Carter.” She puts her hand up to cup my cheek.
“Don’t,” I tell her. “If you touch me, it’s all going to be over.” I grab her hands in mine and hold them in front of us. “This is the first thing that I’ve had that isn’t because of who I am.” I swallow down. “It’s the first thing that is just mine that no one knows about or has smeared across the headlines.”
“That’s because you haven’t given them anything to talk about,” she says, looking down at my hands holding her wrists. “This thing.” Her voice trails off, then she smiles. “This is the last thing I thought would happen.” She shakes her head. “Especially not with you.” I roll my eyes. “But you’re right, if we jumped into bed now, I would wake up with regret.” I try not to let her words hurt me. “Not regret that it’s you, but regret that we didn’t talk about it.” My mouth suddenly goes dry. “Our jobs would be in jeopardy; my reputation would be scrutinized.”
“My contract would be null and void,” I say. “They will throw it out.”
“Exactly,” she says.
“So how about this thing with us stays with us?” I tell her. “Everything between us is only ours.”
She smiles. “Keep talking.”
“This thing between us is stronger than both of us. But I won’t put you in the position that will make you a target. So it’s going to be a secret. This thing between us is ours and only ours until we both decide to share it.”
“What if we never decide?” she asks.
“Then the press is going to think I’ve become a monk.” I laugh, thinking of the possible headlines. She shakes my hands free from her wrists.
“So we can go slow,” she says, putting her hands on my chest, and my heart speeds up, her body coming closer to mine. “We can take our time. We can just be us,” she whispers. “Not the asshole you but the kind you. The one who got scared I was sick and alone, the one who wants to hold my hand and hike. The one who wants to come home and cook for me.” She gets on her tippy toes. “The one who I’d love nothing more than to get naked with.” She kisses the under part of my jaw, and my cock springs into action, thinking about her naked.
I grab her hands away from me and lean in to lightly kiss her lips. “I’m going to the bathroom again,” I tell her. “I promise I won’t be masturbating to memories and the feel of my hands on your gorgeous ass. I’m surprised I still have any skin left, but I have to walk away from you for a few minutes.”
“I can help you with that big problem you have, you know,” she purrs seductively, her hands moving down to my apparent bulge.
“No.” I jump back as if her hands are on fire. “I need you to leave me alone.” I turn and walk away but then turn back and go to her, grabbing her face in my hands. “But when I come back, I want you out of that skirt so we can make out on your bed.” I kiss her softly, then turn to leave. “Give me five minutes.” She shrugs, and I turn and run out of the room. “Could be less,” I tell her, shutting the bathroom door behind me. I walk to the vanity and put my hands on it and hang my head. “Holy shit, I just made out with Erin,” I say softly. “This is a really bad idea.” I look at myself in the mirror. “What are you doing?” Then I finally answer myself. “I’m doing what I want for me. And hopefully for her.” I stop looking at myself and go back to her room. Gone is the suitcase from the bed. “Erin?” I yell, and she comes around from her closet wearing gray pants and a loose long-sleeved black shirt with her hair tied up on top of her head.
“That was fast.” She looks from my face and then down at my junk. “I mean, it’s been three minutes. I guess it’s all about what you do in that time?” She tries to hide her smile.
“I didn’t do anything,” I tell her, going straight to her and grabbing her the way I want to grab her. Picking her up, I now have her legs wrapped around my waist. I groan into her mouth when she wraps her arms around my neck, and my hand roams up her back
and I feel her skin.
“What are you wearing?” I ask her while my hand roams her back, and I feel just skin, no bra no nothing.
“It’s called a keyhole back,” she says, trying to get to my lips. “Carter,” she huffs out, but I’m still roaming with my hand.
“You aren’t wearing a bra?” I’m shocked. I didn’t think I could get hard that fast.
She smirks at me. “I’m just making sure if you want to hit second base, there is nothing stopping you.”
“Oh my God, I love when you talk sports,” I say, walking back to the bed. “Although I’m more of a hockey guy than a baseball guy.” I turn to sit on the bed, and it’s the wrong thing for me to do because she sits right on my cock, and I swear I feel the heat from her pussy.
“Good to know,” she says, grinding down on my cock. “Just so you know, I don’t give a shit as long as it ends with your mouth on my body.” She pushes me down now and takes over the kiss. Her knees are on either side of my hips, and I feel her nipples through her shirt. Fuck. Her tongue comes into my mouth again, and my brain shuts off. Everything except her hands and the feel of her in my arms. She sits up now on me while I lie on my back. Her arms cross in front of her, and she peels her shirt over her head. “Skin on skin,” she says, and it’s almost like it happens in slow motion. I see her stomach first, slowly rolling to her ribs, and then her perfect fucking tits. And I’m not lying when I say they are perfect. Perfect, round, and perk. My hands fly up to cup her in my hands. And I was wrong before. It’s not perfect; it’s way past that. I watch her close her eyes when I roll her perfect pink nipples between my thumb and forefinger. She grinds down harder on me. “Carter,” she says, and I sit up now, taking one into my mouth and slowly rolling it with my tongue. Her hips slowly move, and I watch her struggle.
“Do you want me to make you come?” I ask her, going to the other nipple, and she throws her head back. “Tell me.” She puts her hands on my shoulders, and with me going from nipple to nipple, she comes over my covered cock.
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