by Jae
Her husband nodded. “Yeah, that’s great. Will there be an open bar at the reception?”
Ash stared at him. Two women had just announced that they would be getting married, and all Travis wanted to know was if there would be free booze? Maybe she had misjudged their friends, and people in Fair Oaks were far more open-minded than she had expected.
The waitress came over with a tray full of drinks. “What’s the happy occasion?”
“They’re getting married.” Travis reached for his beer.
“They?” The waitress looked at Ash, then at Chris.
Travis snorted. “Not them. I don’t think these two will get married anytime soon. They’re both still hung up on one of the brides.”
Heat shot up Ash’s neck. She tried to hide her face behind her beer, but she could feel Sasha’s gaze rest on her.
“Would you finally stop that nonsense about Ash and Holly?” Jenny glared at her husband with a look that warned him that he would sleep on the couch tonight if he didn’t stop.
“Wait. Did you just say…o-one of the brides? You mean…?” The waitress stared at Holly and Leo.
Leo nodded. “Holly and I are getting married.”
“Oh.” A frown settled on the waitress’s face. “Well, that’s…um…different.”
The hope Ash had harbored about the people in town being more open-minded than expected was snuffed out like a candle in a hurricane. Being seen as different was not a good thing in Fair Oaks; she had experienced that firsthand.
“No, it’s not,” Sasha said firmly. “It’s just two people who love each other and want to spend the rest of their lives together, just like any other wedding.” She stared at the waitress until the older woman averted her gaze and retreated behind the bar.
Ash couldn’t help admiring Sasha for speaking up without any hesitation.
“Don’t mind her,” Jenny said. “She’ll come around quick once she sees how much business a celebrity wedding will bring to Fair Oaks.”
Leo sputtered into her beer. “It’s not going to be a celebrity wedding! It’s just going to be Holly and me and our families and friends.”
Ash had to smile at the indignant expression on her face. “I hate to tell you, but you are a celebrity.”
“Am not,” Leo grumbled.
“Are too.”
They grinned at each other, and for a moment, it was almost as if the fifteen years since prom night had disappeared and they had their friendship back.
Jenny interrupted by lifting her beer bottle. “To Holly and Leo and wedded bliss!”
They all clinked bottles and glasses.
“Now we only have to find someone for Ashley, and everyone in our high school class will be happily married,” Jenny added.
A sip of beer went down the wrong pipe. Ash started coughing and fended off Sasha’s hand as she tried to pat her back. “Thanks. I’m fine. I, uh, I’m not sure I want to get married. I’m happy on my own, and the shop keeps me too busy for a relationship anyway. You know how it is.” She sent Sasha a gaze that practically screamed for help.
“She’s right,” Sasha said. “Owning your own business isn’t exactly a nine-to-five job. I don’t know many people who’d be very understanding of having a date cut short because I have to get up at three the next morning.”
Ashley nodded a silent “thank-you” in her direction.
“Hmm, that’s right. It’s been pretty quiet for you in the romance department too, hasn’t it, Sasha? I haven’t seen you with a guy since…” Lisa paused and seemed to think about it. “Since you went out with Ethan, and that was years ago, before he met Cait.”
Zack grinned at Holly. “Our brother spoiled her for all other men.”
Sasha snorted. “Ethan’s great. Don’t get me wrong. But we realized not even halfway through our one and only date that we’re better off as friends.”
Ash had to agree. She couldn’t see Sasha with Ethan, who had a tendency to step back and let other people deal with his problems. He would never have an equal relationship with someone as confident as Sasha.
“Plus it’s kind of hard to work up any kind of sexual spark after you’ve seen a person eat an earthworm back in kindergarten,” Sasha added with a grin.
Jenny shrieked, while everyone else laughed.
“Yeah, the joys of dating in a small town.” Chris sighed and took a big swig of his beer. “Hard to maintain an air of mystery and coolness when you’ve all grown up together.”
“Oh, I don’t know.” Holly grinned and gave Leo an affectionate look. “I’ve had to listen to the story about how Leo shoved a pebble up her nose when she was three about a million times, and it didn’t stop me from falling madly in love with her.”
“Didn’t stop me and Travis or Lisa and Zack either,” Jenny said. “So that can’t be it. I also don’t think it’s just your job. I mean, look at you.” She gestured at Sasha with her beer bottle. “You’re strong and fiercely independent, and I bet you can still beat up most of the guys in town, like you did when you were ten and Joey made that comment about your mother running off to—”
“Yes, thank you, Jenny,” Sasha grumbled. “I think we all remember what he said.”
“Sorry.” Jenny reached across the table and squeezed her arm. “I just meant that women like you can come across a little…well, intimidating to most guys.”
“Maybe you should try dating a woman, then,” Leo quipped.
Sasha looked at her. A slow smile spread over her face. “Who says I haven’t? Didn’t go all that well either.”
“What?” Holly’s bottle slid from her grip and clattered onto the table. She quickly righted it before more than a few drops of beer could spill out. “You’ve been with a woman?”
“More than one, actually,” Sasha murmured and shrugged.
Everyone stared at her.
Ash couldn’t believe it—not just that Sasha was queer but how casually she had revealed it. As if it wasn’t a big deal at all. Then, when her stunned brain started to work again, anger bubbled up inside of her. Just yesterday, Sasha had been on her ass about lying and hiding a part of herself, judging her for not coming out to the entire town, and now it turned out she’d been in the closet herself. What a hypocrite!
“You never told me that!” Holly stared across the table at her best friend.
Sasha held her stare without flinching, a silent accusation in her eyes. “It’s not like you talked about your relationships before Leo either.”
Holly looked away and started to peel off the label on her bottle.
Oh, please, please, shut up. Ashley dug her nails into Sasha’s arm beneath the table. Strong muscles bunched beneath her fingers.
Their gazes connected. Sasha’s brown eyes, normally so full of good humor, reflected nothing but hurt.
Ash gentled her grip.
“Oh come on!” Travis thumped his bottle onto the table. “You seriously expect me to believe you’re a lesbian too? The whole world can’t be gay!”
“I never said I was a lesbian.”
“You said you’ve been with women.”
“So?” Sasha looked him in the eyes. “That doesn’t make me a lesbian. If you need to have a term for it, I guess you could say I’m pansexual, but personally, I think labels are for bread and cupcakes, not for people. If they are hot and kind and fun to be around, I don’t care about a person’s packaging.”
Oh yeah? For someone who didn’t care for labels, Sasha had been pretty insistent on finding out whether Ash was gay or bi. But Ash couldn’t very well point that out without drawing attention to her own sexual orientation.
“Pansexual. Man, I need another beer.” Travis waved the waitress over and ordered another round for the table.
“Not for me,” Sasha said. “I have to get up early tomorrow to make the cake for Mr. Gillespie’
s birthday, so I’d better get going.”
Jenny reached across the table and grabbed her hand.
Ash marveled at that casual touch. She’d never been able to act so carefree around women and just allow herself to touch them without thought, even in such an innocent way.
“I’m sorry, Sash,” Jenny said. “I didn’t mean to put you on the spot and chase you off.”
“Nah. You didn’t. I’m fine with who I am.” Sasha gave her hand a squeeze, then waved at the others before facing Ash. “Could you please let me out?”
Ash got up. “I should be leaving too. I, um, have to get up early. Invoices and stuff, you know?” It wasn’t a lie, but, of course, it wasn’t the full truth either. Mainly, she didn’t want to stay behind, afraid to have the attention turned toward her once Sasha was gone and everyone was talking about sexual orientations.
Holly stood too. “I’m coming with you. I’ll walk you home, Sasha.”
Sasha shook her head. “This is practically your engagement party. You should stay and toast marital bliss again. We’ll talk another time, okay?”
Holly sank back into the booth and leaned against Leo’s shoulder. “Okay.”
Ash wanted to put some money on the table, but Leo waved her away. “I’ve got it.”
“Thank you.” Then she walked to the door, with no idea what she would say to Sasha once they were outside.
Sasha closed the door behind them and looked around in search of Ashley’s SUV. Finally, she discovered it a bit down the street. “Come on. I’ll walk you to your car.”
While they walked, Ashley kept glancing at her out of the corner of her eye. Twice, she opened her mouth as if to say something, but both times, she stayed silent. The disapproval radiating off her spoke volumes, though.
A quiet sigh escaped Sasha. Okay, let’s get it over with. Even though she suspected the invoices Ashley had to prepare tomorrow had been just an excuse, Sasha really had a cake to bake first thing in the morning.
She turned around to Ashley. “Want to come home with me?”
Ashley nearly stumbled because she was staring at Sasha instead of watching where she was going.
Sasha snorted. “I didn’t mean it like that. I meant you might as well come in with me to talk. Clearly, there’s something you want to say to me, and we wouldn’t want the good people of Fair Oaks to see you talking to a queer woman.”
It came out a lot harsher than she had intended. Her anger—or maybe more hurt than anger—was really directed at Holly for not telling her about their relationship. Taking it out on Ashley wasn’t fair, so she tried to rein herself in.
But this time, Ashley didn’t back down or flinch from her anger. She put her hands on her curvy hips and held Sasha’s stare for the very first time. “Oh, that would only be a problem if anyone knew you’re…” She cut herself off and then finished in a whisper, “…not straight.”
“Fine, if you want to discuss this here, I can do that.”
“Um, no. Can we…?” Ashley pointed down the street, toward the bakery.
Wordlessly, Sasha led her to her apartment and up the stairs. She unlocked the front door and held it open for Ashley.
Compared to Ashley’s very tidy house, her apartment looked like the typical bachelorette pad, with mismatched furniture, this morning’s empty coffee mug still in the sink in her tiny kitchenette, and an unmade bed. Not that Ashley would ever get to see the latter, and Sasha decided she didn’t care what Ashley thought about the rest.
She took off her boots and coat, padded across the burgundy-and-tan area rug, and dropped down on the couch. “Want to sit down?”
Ashley paced back and forth before finally sitting on the other end of the couch. She hadn’t taken off her coat, either because she didn’t intend to stay long or because she felt she needed its protective layer.
Sasha watched her silently. With her flushed cheeks and her flashing eyes, Ashley looked kind of attractive. Yeah, about as attractive as a Doberman who’s about to tear into you.
“I really can’t believe you,” Ashley finally burst out as if her emotions had reached a boiling point. “You’re…you’re pansexual?”
“What? You of all people have a problem with that? That’s pretty hypocritical, don’t you think?”
“Oh, you are one to talk about hypocrisy!” Ashley glared at her. “I don’t have a problem with you being pansexual. I have a problem with you judging me for not being out and proud, while you’re a total closet case yourself!”
Sasha vehemently shook her head. “I’m not in the closet. Never was.”
“Come on! Not even your closest friend knew!”
“That doesn’t mean I’m in the closet. I never hid my sexual orientation. I just never had a reason to talk about it. Why would I when I haven’t met anyone I clicked with since culinary school? I’m not the one who had a relationship and hid it like a dirty little secret.”
“I didn’t! She wasn’t… I just… I couldn’t handle it. The stares…the whispering…people talking about me… I just can’t.” Ashley sank back against the couch. She shoved her hands beneath her thighs, but Sasha could tell they were trembling.
At the sight of Ashley’s distress, Sasha’s annoyance deflated like a punctured cream puff. She pinched the bridge of her nose. “Okay, listen. This isn’t getting us anywhere. We have to work together. Can we agree to try and get along?”
“If you promise to stop judging me all the time. You’ve been doing it for years, and I’m sick of—” Ashley’s mouth snapped shut midsentence, and she narrowed her eyes. “Wait a minute. I always thought you were judging me because of Holly and the way we broke up, but if you didn’t know about that… What is it that you dislike about me so much?”
“I like you just fine,” Sasha mumbled. In fact, there had been times when she had liked Ashley a little too much. Well, not liked liked, of course, but her libido had been stuck in high school mode for a while. Who could blame her? Pretty much everyone in her class had had a crush on Ashley, male or female, gay or straight. It didn’t mean a thing, even though it was still annoying as hell.
“Could have fooled me.”
“No, really.” Shit. She couldn’t very well tell Ashley that she wasn’t angry with her as much as she was angry with herself for having had a crush on someone who, personality-wise, wasn’t her type at all. “I like you…well, most of the time. I guess sometimes, that prim-and-proper routine can be a little much.”
Ashley sat so straight you could have put a level against her back, and it would have been perfectly balanced. “It’s not a routine,” she said, her voice quiet, but firm. “I honestly care about doing what’s right.”
“Yeah, about what’s right for people, not for yourself or for Holly.”
Ashley’s nougat-colored eyes flashed. “Is this really the best you can do at not judging?”
Christ. Ashley was even more infuriating when she was right. Sasha held up her hands. “Okay, okay. I’ll try harder.”
“Good,” Ashley said. “And can you please try not to hold it against Holly either? She wanted to tell you about…about us, but I asked her not to. I just didn’t think she’d honor my wishes even after we broke up.” She sounded deep in thought, as if she was talking more to herself than to Sasha. “I thought for sure she had told you.”
“Then you don’t know Holly very well.” Sasha was starting to understand that Ashley didn’t know anyone very well—and that she didn’t let anyone else close enough to know her very well either.
Ashley sighed but didn’t answer. She withdrew her hands from beneath her thighs and stood. “I’ll let you get some rest now since you have an early start tomorrow.”
Sasha walked her to the door and opened it for her.
Ashley stepped outside but then paused and turned back around. “Do you think we can do this? Work together without all
this tension?”
“Yeah, sure. No problem.” She wasn’t a kid anymore and could easily ignore those momentary flashes of attraction that added to the tension. “We’re both adults after all. Should be a piece of…”
“Wedding cake?” Ashley finished for her. The first real smile all evening curled the corners of her mouth, drawing Sasha’s attention to her full lips.
She cleared her throat and forced herself to look away from that smile. “Yep. A total piece of wedding cake.”
Chapter 5
Tuesdays were usually Ash’s quietest days, with not that many customers and no fresh flower deliveries. But for some reason, today had been unexpectedly hectic…and slightly awkward. A beaming, freshly engaged couple had come in to order flowers for their wedding just as Ash had been showing different options for funeral wreaths to a grieving widow.
It wasn’t until she had closed the shop for the day that she finally got around to taking the small sample bouquet she had created over to the bakery. At first, she had considered having her driver drop it off but quickly rejected the idea.
She and Sasha had agreed to work together, so she couldn’t avoid her, as much as she wanted to.
Her fingers were a bit clammy around the paper-wrapped bouquet as she reached out to pull the front door of the bakery open. It was silly, really, but now that Sasha knew she was gay, Ash felt like a knight whose shield had been ripped away. Strangely, knowing Sasha wasn’t straight either made her even more nervous.
Determined to get over it, she gave the door a sharp tug.
It didn’t budge, jerking Ash back.
She leaned forward and peered through the glass.
The closed sign dangled at eye level, but there was still light in the bakery. Ash could make out the fox-red hair of Mae Peterson, Sasha’s aunt.
When Ash knocked on the glass, Mae looked up from wiping down the counter. A smile spread over her lined face. She gave a wave, rounded the corner, and unlocked the door. “Evening, Ashley. You missed your three o’clock cupcake, didn’t you?”