Had he decided that he had almost made a huge mistake?
Chapter Sixty-Two
I woke up to my bedroom door opening.
‘Mum, Uncle Rory will be picking me up in a minute,’ Izzy said in the darkness. And then there was a yelp. ‘Oh, sorry, Heather!’
I hastily turned on the lamp. Izzy had stepped on Heather in her sleeping bag, waking her up with a jump.
‘What’s going on?’ Heather said, sleepily.
‘I just came to say goodbye,’ Izzy said, laughing a little. ‘Why are you on the floor?’
‘Last night, it seemed like a good idea, but my back is killing me,’ Heather replied, struggling to sit up. She had refused to sleep in one of the guest bedrooms and had instead curled up on my floor as she had done many times when we were teenagers. ‘Wow, we drank way too much last night.’
‘We did,’ I agreed, struggling to sit up, my head beginning to pound almost instantly. ‘Give me a hug,’ I said to Izzy. She stepped gingerly around Heather to lean down and hug me. ‘Will you be okay?’
‘Yeah. Uncle Rory said we can get breakfast afterwards.’
I smiled. ‘Okay. Well, we can do something fun when you get back, okay?’
‘Okay. See you later.’ She practically skipped out of the room again.
I sighed. ‘She’s really going to miss him.’
Heather looked at me. ‘And so are you. You didn’t want to go with them?’
‘Drew didn’t suggest it.’ I put my head in my hands and shook it. ‘I really thought… God, am I really stupid?!’
‘Well, I mean…’ She trailed off when I glared at her. ‘Sorry. No, of course you’re not! You two are meant to be, it’s obvious.’
‘Not to Drew.’
Heather thought for a moment. ‘Maybe he was scared to ask you. I guess it didn’t work out last time, did it?’
‘That’s putting it mildly.’ I pulled my hair into a ponytail. ‘I honestly thought that last night, he felt the same as I did.’
‘Beth, you need to tell him how you feel. Maybe he does. I’m sure he does! But he must be scared. You’ve only just come back into his life and you have so much history.’
‘Plus, he has a girlfriend,’ I reminded her.
‘Not for much longer. Come on, he doesn’t love her and now he’s found out what she did… He’s going to move back here, and then the three of you can be a family.’
‘Could it actually be that simple though?’
‘If you let it.’ She shrugged.
‘I just keep thinking about how I broke his heart. Why would he put himself through that again? What if I tell him how I feel and he doesn’t feel the same, or he does but he doesn’t trust me? Maybe he thinks I’d just leave him again. And that’s what I’m most scared of. What if he’s right? What if we did get back together; what if I messed it all up and I ran away again? Izzy would never forgive me. I’d never forgive myself. There’s just too much at stake.’ There was a strange sense of relief in saying my fears out loud.
Heather absorbed my words then slowly shook her head. ‘No one knows going into any relationship whether or not it will work but, Beth, you’ve loved that man for over ten years, and you guys have been through so much. You’ve found each other again, that surely has to mean something. You’re older and a little bit wiser now.’ She smiled. ‘You have Izzy, you know how to be there day in and day out for someone. You’ve decided to come home. You’re not running anywhere, Beth.’
Heather was right that I had never really stopped loving Drew. I walked away because I thought I had to, not because I wanted to. I had never given my heart to anyone else. ‘Do you really think he might feel the same?’
‘The only way to find out is to ask him.’ She climbed out of her sleeping bag. ‘Right, I’m going to have a shower and then you’re going to feed me coffee and bacon, okay?’ She headed into the bathroom.
I looked at the book on my bedside table. The one Drew bought me at the botanical garden. I picked it up and put it on my lap. I ran my fingers across the cover. It felt like Drew and I had had so many missed opportunities. What if the universe was trying to tell me that I should just let us go?
Opening up the book, I frowned as a piece of paper slipped out of it. I picked it up and opened it. It was a letter.
‘Dear Beth…’
My heart started to speed up almost instantly when I saw it was from Drew. He had written me a letter and left it in the book for me to find. I grabbed it and started to read it eagerly… hungrily.
Dear Beth,
I am writing this in my apartment, looking down at the park, the sun streaming through the window, and wishing I was back in Scotland. Ever since I saw you in the pub that first night, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. About us.
We’ve been through so much, haven’t we? We loved each other then lost each other. And we’ve had an amazing daughter together. I hate that I missed out on so much. I hate that we didn’t raise her together. And I want to be there for every moment that I can now.
I keep thinking about your letter. I still can’t believe that April destroyed it. There have been so many missed opportunities. I’m sat here wondering if I’m crazy to think there might be a second chance for us, but I can’t stop thinking about how it felt to kiss you at the Hogmanay party. About how much I wish that you, me and Izzy could be a family. I have no idea how you feel. I’ve been too scared to ask you. Which is why I’m writing a letter for the first time in years. I’ll probably be too scared to even give it to you.
But being with you makes me feel brave. And strong. Like I can do anything. It always has. It still does. And I know that if I don’t do this now, say this now, then we will miss another opportunity, and that will be it.
My heart is, and always has been, yours.
If you could ever feel the same way then I need to know. I need you to tell me.
Could you, Beth? Do you?
Drew
I knew then that the reason I hadn’t told Drew how I felt was because I wasn’t sure I deserved his love. I felt like the choice I had made when I was sixteen meant I should be alone, but Drew was telling me that he did still love me. And not just that – he also wanted us to be a family, something I had wanted for ten years. God, I had made so many mistakes but, somehow, he had forgiven me for them. I felt like I had been trying to make things right since I came home, but there was one thing left to do. And I really hoped that I would be able to do it, finally.
‘Heather!!!!’ I leapt up and started hammering on the bathroom door. ‘Heather!!!’
‘What? Oh my god, what?’ She flung the door open, hastily wrapping a towel around her. ‘Are you okay?’
‘No, I’m not!’ I waved his letter at her. ‘He does feel the same! Look! He’s written me a letter!’
‘What?’ She stared at it, stupidly.
‘It’s from Drew,’ I said, my words coming out in a rush. ‘He loves me, and he wants to know if I feel the same!’
Her eyes widened. ‘Oh my god,’ she said.
‘Exactly! We have to go to the airport! I have to tell him!’ I made for the door.
‘You’re still in your pyjamas!’ she cried.
‘Crap. Quick, let’s get dressed. Can we make it?’ I asked her, desperately.
‘We have to make it,’ she replied, determined. ‘What are you standing there for, hurry up!’
I dashed into the bathroom, my heart racing. I had to speak to him before he got on that plane. I had to tell him that I loved him. I wasn’t going to let him get on another plane without telling him how I felt.
My heart is, and always has been, yours.
I glanced in the mirror as his words in the letter came back to me. ‘Mine too,’ I whispered to it.
Chapter Sixty-Three
Heather groaned as she had to slow her car down to join a line of traffic.
I had tried to call Drew as we got into the car, but he hadn’t answered, so Heather had called Rory, but he
hadn’t picked up either.
I was starting to regret not letting Izzy have her own phone as we crawled towards our destination. ‘What if we don’t make it?’
‘Try calling him again.’
I grabbed my phone again. ‘Straight through to voicemail again. Maybe his battery has died.’
‘If we miss him then you can leave him a message.’ She looked across at me, though, with a grimace. Neither of us wanted that to happen. I didn’t want another missed opportunity for us. It felt like we wouldn’t survive another one. He had poured out his heart in that letter and was waiting for me to do the same. I couldn’t bear the thought of him at the airport, looking for me, and thinking that I wasn’t coming. Ten years ago, he had waited in the same airport, and I hadn’t shown up. This time, I just had to be there.
The traffic moved forward a little. My foot tapped against the floor of the car impatiently. ‘I can’t believe he wrote me a letter,’ I said. ‘Why didn’t he just talk to me last night?’ I groaned.
‘Because he was too scared just like you were,’ she replied. ‘I feel like banging your heads together, to be honest.’
‘He must have slipped it into the book after we danced. He said he needed the loo.’ I remembered then. So, he had felt something in that moment, like me, enough to push him to give me the letter. ‘If only he had just said something or kissed me,’ I said, shaking my head. But Izzy had come in, I knew that. And neither of us wanted to hurt our little girl. We had been too cautious, too worried about the past, unsure if we really could have a second chance. I just hoped we hadn’t left it too late.
‘This is so romantic,’ Heather said then.
‘It’ll only be romantic if we make it!’ I touched the moon and star necklace around my neck, willing it to give us good luck.
‘We will,’ she promised, changing lanes to try to get ahead of some of the cars in front of us. ‘It’s the next exit.’
I tried calling Drew again but there was no response. I stared out of the window, willing us to move faster, as Heather weaved through cars and got into the lane for the airport. ‘There it is,’ I said as the building started to appear in view. ‘What if he switched his phone off because he thought I wasn’t going to say anything? That he thinks I read his letter and just ignored it?’
‘This will be a nice surprise then,’ Heather said. ‘Don’t worry, as soon as he sees you, he’ll know that you feel the same.’
We fell into silence then as Heather navigated the complicated airport signage and finally found the drop-off point. ‘You get out here; I’ll go and park and catch you up,’ she said, slamming on the brakes.
‘Thank you!’ I called as I jumped out and raced towards the terminal building. I went up to the departures board and scanned the names until I found Edinburgh, where Drew was heading for his connecting flight to Boston. It was due to leave in half an hour. I hadn’t missed it at least. My heart in my throat, I looked around for any sign of him.
My phone rang so I answered it instantly. ‘Drew?’
‘It’s me,’ Heather said, breathlessly. ‘I got through to Rory – finally – they’re in the cafe at the top of the escalator,’ she said in a rush. ‘Hurry!’
I didn’t have time to thank her, I just hung up and charged up the escalator, pushing past everyone stood on it with suitcases. At the top, I looked wildly left and right before I saw the cafe with tables overlooking the terminal. I rushed to it and breathed a sigh of relief when I spotted Izzy sitting with Rory. ‘Iz!’ I called, causing a few people to turn to look at me. I ran over to them, out of breath. ‘Where’s Drew?’ I gasped out to their surprised faces.
‘Right here.’
I spun around, coming face-to-face with Drew. He stood behind me, holding the handle of his small wheelie suitcase, a line of stubble on his chin. My chest sagged with relief. ‘I was worried I wasn’t going to catch you. I just saw… I just read your letter.’
‘And?’ He raised an eyebrow.
I didn’t answer, I just reached for him, wrapping my arms around his neck. I looked into his eyes and caught his grin before I pressed my lips to his as he kissed me back and picked me up, twirling me around, making me break away from his lips to laugh. ‘Sorry I’m ten years too late,’ I whispered to him.
‘You’re right on time,’ he replied.
‘What’s going on?’ Izzy demanded from behind me. Drew put me down, and we turned around to face our daughter, and Rory behind her, both looking bemused but smiling.
‘Did I miss it?’ A voice called out to us then, and Heather popped up at the top of the escalator. She saw Drew’s arm still wrapped around me. ‘Oh, I missed it, didn’t I?’
‘What’s going on?’ Rory asked. ‘I’m completely lost.’
‘So am I,’ Izzy complained.
‘I’m in love with your dad,’ I said to Izzy. I turned to Drew. ‘And I want you to stay. Please.’
‘I love you, too,’ Drew replied, pulling me towards him to give me a long, slow kiss. Izzy started clapping and the noise grew louder until we broke apart and realised half the cafe were clapping along too. Drew started laughing and I joined in, my cheeks turning red.
‘At least I caught that,’ Heather said, holding up her phone and videoing us. ‘Could you maybe re-enact what happened before I got here?’ She saw our faces and put her phone down. ‘Okay, I’ll take that as a no.’
‘Dad, does this mean you’ll move back to Scotland with us?’ Izzy asked, hopefully.
Drew pulled her to us. ‘It does. I’ve been offered a job at the hospital in Inverness. So, I’ll get to see a lot more of both of you, I hope. If that’s okay with you?’
‘We can go to the Harry Potter studios!’ she said with a gasp. I laughed. Trust her to think of that.
Drew grinned. ‘Deal.’ His face fell a little as he looked at the board. ‘I have to go to the gate now. I’m working at the hospital tomorrow so I can’t stay.’ He saw Izzy’s face. ‘I’ll be back as soon as I can, okay? We all have a lot to sort out, don’t we?’ he said, meeting my gaze. I nodded. We really did. ‘We’ll be back together again soon,’ he promised. He gave Izzy a big hug and then brushed his lips against mine, making my skin tingle. He turned to Rory and hugged him and Heather goodbye. Picking up his case he headed for the gate. ‘See you guys,’ he called with a wave, before disappearing from view.
‘Rory, I’ve just realised that I love you and I wanted to tell you,’ Heather said then.
Rory turned to look at her and chuckled. ‘You’re a nut, Heather, and I love you, too.’ He pulled her to him, and they kissed.
‘Everyone is kissing,’ Izzy said. ‘I don’t get it.’
I pulled her to me, wrapping my arms around her. ‘You will one day. So, it’s our turn now, we need to go back to London and sort everything out there.’
‘But we’ll be back soon, too, won’t we?’ she asked, looking back at me as she leaned against me.
‘This is our home now,’ I told her.
‘Too bloody right it is,’ Heather said, pulling away from Rory.
‘Heather swore,’ Izzy said, her eyes wide.
‘She’s always been a bad influence,’ I told her.
Epilogue
Eleven Months Later…
It was the week before Christmas and Glendale Hall was a hive of activity.
‘Are you ready, Beth?’ Drew called up the stairs to me.
‘Coming!’ I wrapped my red scarf tightly around my neck and put my beanie hat on. Outside, flurries drifted on the wind and the sun had already set, which meant I could just see the lights twinkling down in the garden signalling that the second annual Glendale Hall Christmas Trail was ready for inspection. I hurried down the wide staircase, smiling as I still did when I saw Drew.
It was a couple of months after we said goodbye at the airport before we saw each other again. I had gone to London with Izzy and packed up our life there. Emily had given us a goodbye dinner, and promised to come up to Scotland when she could. Dre
w had also had to sort everything out over in Boston, and also to finally end things with April. She had collected the rest of her things from their apartment to move back in with her family, and he hadn’t heard from her since. Drew now lived at his family’s farm and commuted to his new job in Inverness, but spent every moment that he could with us at Glendale Hall.
‘I can’t wait to see it,’ he said, taking my hand in his. We wanted to make sure the trail was as perfect as it could be for when it opened in a couple of days. John and I had spent hours on it, trying to make it twice as magical as it was the previous year. And I couldn’t wait to see it all lit up, with Drew by my side.
‘Where’s Iz?’ I asked, looking around as we walked through the kitchen to the French doors. The house seemed oddly quiet all of a sudden. Izzy had blossomed since we moved to Glendale. She loved her new school, especially it’s immense library, and made some good friends. She and my mum spent the evenings I studied at college together, and I loved seeing their bond grow. My dad had moved into his place in the village and we saw him once a week, although it was still hard to see him with Cathy, who was preparing to move into his house. My mum had picked herself up and had thrown herself into our village project. I also couldn’t help but notice that she and John were spending more and more time together, and I hoped that they would finally let themselves love one another soon. They both deserved to be happy.
So far, the shops on the high street were doing great, particularly the Glendale Hall shop, which we all worked together on. Heather was revolutionising the library, too, and it was lovely to see so many members of the community making use of it. And she was taking classes at the same college as me.
‘Oh, I think they’re all outside somewhere. Come on, I can’t wait to see it.’ Drew pulled on my hand, and I laughed at how impatient he was being. We walked out into the chilly garden towards the start of the trail. John had let me become more involved with the garden and I had my own patch again, as I had when I was younger. I also got my way and installed beehives, adding beekeeping to the list of things I was learning, and we hoped to have a range of honey products ready for the shop soon.
Coming Home to Glendale Hall Page 31