“Of course not.” I lean into him and rest my head on his shoulder.
We sit in silence for the longest time, only listening to the sound of the clock ticking on the wall. It’s almost like a metronome, keeping the pulse of life for those still living.
The funeral director quietly walks up to Wade and kneels down next to him in the aisle. “I do not want to rush you, Mr. Hoffman, but light is starting to dwindle. If you’d like to bring your grandfather to the columbarium, we really should be heading out in the next fifteen minutes.”
Wade’s dark eyebrows tug in, but he nods. “We can go now. I guess I wasn’t paying attention to the time.”
The funeral director tips his head, standing back up, and making room for the two of us to leave the chapel. Wade breaks from the aisle, walking up to the urn and collecting one of the large floral arrangements of blooming lilies. Clutching it to his chest, he makes his way back to me.
As we walk out, the funeral director heads back to the table and gently lifts the urn. Wade pauses in the doorway, waiting for him to catch up.
“Would you like to take the hearse or ride on your own?” the funeral director asks as he reaches us.
Wade swallows hard, shaking his head. “No, I think we’ll drive, if that’s okay.”
“Of course. Whatever you are most comfortable with. I’ll meet you there,” he says, tipping his head and walking by.
“Come on. I’ll drive,” I say, interlocking my right arm in his left.
He nods. “Thanks, Dru. I appreciate that.”
Together, we walk out of the Mistwood Point Funeral Home and out into the crisp fall air. It still smells like the death of summer, but the chill of winter lingers in the air. Snow is on its way.
Without speaking, we walk over to Big Blue and get inside. Wade holds the vase in his lap and the entire car fills with the pungent odor of lilies. We wait for the hearse to leave its garage and I flip on my headlights and follow. The two-minute drive to the cemetery takes ten minutes thanks to the snail’s pace of the hearse and its memorial procession. The silence in our vehicle is a heavy weight. A final good-bye is pressing upon us and, I know all too well, I’m not terribly good with good-byes. Mine, or anyone else’s.
By the time we pull into the cemetery, the funeral director is already opening the small columbarium container.
“So, this is it,” Wade whispers.
“Guess so,” I nod.
Leaning back in his seat, Wade takes a quick look around the cemetery. “This is where we first met.”
A smile spreads across my lips. “It certainly is.”
“Interesting how we both keep getting drawn to the dead,” he says, reaching for the door handle.
“Yeah,” I nod, opening my car door.
Guilt pangs through my insides and I promise myself for the hundredth time that when this is all over, I’m going to tell him about Cat’s resurrection—and Colton’s kiss. Neither of them seemed overly important in light of all of this.
As we get out of the truck, I walk over to him, adjusting his tie again before sliding my hand in his. He adjusts the vase of flowers, holding out to the side to give me some room.
“Would you like to do the honors?” the funeral director asks, holding out the urn.
Wade’s eyes widen and he shakes his head. “No thanks. I’m… I’m okay.”
Nodding, the funeral director places the urn inside its new home and bows his head in silence. We do the same, sending a final wish for a peaceful afterlife. The peacefulness of it makes me wonder, now more than ever, what happens when we die. Is it simply the end? Or is there something beautiful on the other side?
A pang of guilt tugs at the back of my mind. What if I stopped Cat from going someplace beautiful?
After a moment or two, the funeral director closes the container and places a hand on Wade’s shoulder. “Your grandfather was a lucky man to have had you in his life.”
“Thanks,” Wade croaks out, dropping his gaze to the ground.
“I’ll be in touch, Mr. Hoffman. Have a good night,” he says softly before turning to me. “You as well, Ms. Blackwood.”
“Thank you,” I say, tipping my head.
When the hearse has left the premises, Wade steps up to the columbarium and sets down the vase of flowers. Without a word, we take a seat on the granite bench near the memorial wall.
“Well, I guess my time in Mistwood Point is officially coming to a close,” Wade says, swallowing hard.
“Have you decided what you want to do?” I ask, looking over my shoulder at him.
“I don’t know. I need to close out his estate. Something about probate, whatever that is. But I’ll have to get things in line for next year. I suppose I’ll need to find an apartment in town. You don’t happen to know of any good places in Windhaven?” he says, turning to me.
I shake my head. “Not when it comes to renting. But…”
Wade quirks an eyebrow.
I smile. “What if you just come to live at the manor? I mean, there’s plenty of rooms and it’s not like you wouldn’t just be at the house anyway.”
Wade snickers quietly. “And who’s to say you wouldn’t be spending all your time at my new pad?”
I narrow my gaze and shrug. “Mmmm…rented bachelor pad or enormous, historical manor. Tough choice. I see your point.”
“Bachelor pad. Psh,” Wade says. “I’m pretty sure I’m spoken for, but I’ll give you the manor versus apartment debate. Are you sure your dad won’t mind?”
I grin. “Of course not. Then it’s settled. When you’re ready, you move in with me and my dad.”
“How could I pass up staying at Blackwood Manor? I mean, if for no other reason, it contains the most beautiful woman in the world,” Wade says, taking me into his arms. “I’ll certainly have to thank your dad…as soon as we can get him to stay put long enough for me to meet him.”
I laugh. “Well, living in the same house, it will be kind of hard to avoid each other. Don’t you think?”
“Very true,” Wade says. “It will be nice to leave Mistwood Point behind.”
“I can imagine.”
Wade shifts on the bench slightly, his gaze falling on the flowers. “Do you—would you mind if I have a moment alone, Autumn?”
Looking up, sadness and anxiety linger in his silver eyes. “Of course. Take as much time as you need. I’ll just… wander a bit. I have some old friends I’d like to visit.”
I pull back from him and stand up. It’s been a while since I wandered this graveyard…and after all that’s gone on, I could certainly use a little bit of its stillness.
Bending in, I kiss the top of his head and make my way toward the older graves. They look totally different in the semi-daylight, but still have an air of mystery and romance to them. In fact, as the sun sets low behind the trees, the air of mystery is heightened.
Brushing my hands along the older tombstones and statues, I can’t help but wonder how we lost our desire to honor the dead with more than a flat slab of rock. We used to take more care—put more effort into honoring the love we shared for a lost friend or family member.
I edge my way to the place where I first met Wade and take a seat. Charlotte’s grave looks the same—aged and worn, but still beautiful in its etching.
“Well, Charlotte, we meet again,” I say. “A lot has changed since the last time I was here.”
A single red rose sits beside the tombstone, perhaps left by family or someone like me who admires the past. I study the markings and small ornate sculptures along the outer edge of her headstone. She must have been a prominent woman in the town to have such a beautifully crafted piece.
When I was last here, I had no idea I had powers. No idea I could resurrect the dead or see them. I just…felt called to be near them. That was all.
I suppose it’s why I wanted to be a forensic scientist, too. Death is a part of me. It’s engrained into who and what I am.
Death is my gift. Or is it life?
Perh
aps it’s a fine line to tread.
Even though I’m convinced I did the right thing with Cat, I have this innate urge to bury the gift of resurrection. Because really, who should ever have the power to decide who lives and who dies? Who should have the right to play God and alter the fate of another?
What if I altered the future by saving her?
My gaze falls to the rose. It reminds me of the first time Wade was at Blackwood Manor and the vase of roses shattered to the floor. Wade and I had been on the verge of taking things to the next level that day.
Sighing to myself, I place my fingers on my lips. I don’t know how to tell Wade about Colton’s kiss, but I know it’ll have to be done soon or he’ll think I was keeping it from him. Which I suppose I have been. But not for my sake—for his.
My eyes flit to the headstone again and I read its inscription: May the Angel of Death Lead Thee into Paradise.
I truly hope on the other side is paradise. Knowing that would make it easier to let go. Picking up the rose, I spin it between my thumb and index finger. As I do so, a tiny red thread drops to the ground. Curious, I pick it up. It’s no longer than two or three inches, but the center is frayed and looks like it could snap in two at a moment’s notice.
I know the feeling.
I set the rose and string down, letting them rest beside the headstone.
“Good talk,” I say, patting Charlotte’s grave as I stand back up.
The sunlight is nearly gone, and only bright-red tendrils slip through tiny cracks between tree trunks. Making my way back to the columbarium, I continue to take in the names of people around me, wondering what their lives were like and how long it’s been since anyone visited them.
As I make my way into the newer part of the cemetery, I’m pulled up short when I realize Wade isn’t where I left him—and he isn’t alone. Yards away from the columbarium, he stands with his back to me. His arms are out wide, flailing about in the air, as if he’s passionately describing something.
I edge closer, trying to see if I can get within earshot. As I do, I notice the man he’s talking to isn’t a stranger. He’s the man who billowed out of the black smoke and collected the souls at the site of Cat and Colton’s accident.
“What the—?” I say, narrowing my gaze and creeping closer. I stop a few meters back, shrouding myself behind a large oak tree.
“It is forbidden, Wade. You know the consequences if you—” the other man says.
Wade counters. “I don’t care what you say. I’m not like you. It could be a full lifetime from now before I ever have to—”
“The duration of your human existence doesn’t matter. The fact is, she breaks the laws balancing life and death. Her kind is in direct opposition to what it is we’ve been put here to do. You know this,” the man says.
My eyes widen and I take a step back.
Are they talking about me?
“You don’t know that. She can see the dead, that’s true. But she might not be a necromancer,” Wade retorts.
“Has she not told you of her friend, then?”
“I—what are you talking about?” Wade says, clearly flustered by the question.
I bite down on my lip and curse myself for not having been honest sooner.
“We are done here. Talk to her and see for yourself,” the man says. “Then, end this charade. This forbidden relationship will only end badly. Should the Moirai catch wind…”
“They won’t,” Wade says, taking a step forward.
“You don’t know that. If they do, hers will not be the only thread they cut loose.” Before Wade can say anything in response, the man vanishes into his billow of black smoke.
Chapter 30
Sinner
Straightening my shoulders, I move around the large oak tree and make my way over to Wade as nonchalantly as possible. Before I jump to any conclusions, I’m going to need to hear what he has to say. Besides, I’m acutely aware he’s not the only one who’s been keeping secrets still.
“Hey, who was that?” I ask as I reach him.
Wade spins around, eyes wide. All the color has drained from his face and it takes him a moment to recover. “I, uh—that was no one. Just some guy who was looking for the caretaker.”
I narrow my gaze and tilt my head. “Really? It sorta looked like you knew each other.”
Wade clears his throat, walking back to the columbarium. “Er, yeah. I think I’ve seen him around town before.”
Following behind him, my heart clenches at the lie. Maybe if I come clean, he’ll feel open enough to do it, too.
“So, I have something to tell you…” I say.
Wade runs his hand along the backside of his neck and turns to look at me. “Okay, what is it?”
“The other day, when you called me about your grandpa…something happened.” I search his eyes, hoping to see some glint of emotion, maybe guilt, for having just lied. But all that’s reflected back at me is curiosity. I look down at my shoes and clear my throat. “I, uh—I think I’ve finally gotten a good grip on my powers.”
Wade’s eyes widen and he takes a step closer. “That’s fantastic, Autumn. Why didn’t you tell me sooner? This would have been good news…”
I shake my head. “Not exactly. I guess I can say I’d rather I didn’t have to practice the way I did.”
“What do you mean?” he says, narrowing his gaze and taking a seat on the granite bench. He pats the spot beside him and I sit down.
“Well, Colton and Cat were in an accident…something ran out in front of them. They swerved to miss and…” I turn to face the columbarium and my words drift off.
“And?” he presses.
I press my palms together and slide them between my knees. “Cat died.”
“What?” Wade says, indignantly. “And you didn’t tell me? This whole time you were here when—”
I wave a hand. “She’s fine.”
“Jesus Christ—say that part first, would you?” he says, clutching at his chest and walking away. I follow behind him, reaching for his arm and spinning him around.
“There’s more to it, though,” I whisper, biting on the side of my cheek. “I’m the one who brought her back.”
Wade’s inhale is sharp and I see the recognition in his eyes. Recognition he was hoping wasn’t true. “Like, you gave her CPR?”
I press my lips tight and raise an eyebrow. “You know that’s not what I meant.”
Wade shakes his head. “But you…you can see the ghosts. Abigail—”
I shrug. “I know. For some reason, I can do both. I don’t understand how it all works. I just know Cat’s alive because of what I did.”
Wade’s hands fly to his head and he rakes his fingertips through his hair. “This is—bad. Really bad.”
“Bad? I thought you were excited for me to figure out my powers,” I say, trying to coax him along.
His eyes flit back to me and he nods. “You’re right. It is. Totally. I just mean…” His eyebrows tug in and the lines across his jaw tighten. “How horrible for Cat. And you. That must have been terrifying.”
I stare at him, shocked that when faced with the truth, he still isn’t willing to open up fully to me.
My heart clenches and my gaze falls to the ground. Leaves billow past in colors of brown, gold, and red, and I can’t help but wish things were as simple as their lifespans. Leaves bud, grow, and eventually wither and die. They fall to the ground without holding on to what once was. Instead, they just…let go.
Nodding, I finally say, “Yeah, it was pretty bad. I can’t say I’m in any hurry to use that power again. You know?”
Taking a deep breath, I return my gaze to him. If he can keep secrets of his own, maybe I should keep a few of my own. Like Colton’s kiss…
Wade steps forward, wrapping his arms around me. Melting into his embrace I close my eyes.
“If there’s anything I can do, let me know,” he whispers, stroking my hair.
“There’s nothing to do. Cat will
heal…” I say. “She is healing. In fact, everyone’s surprised at how fast she’s getting better.”
Wade doesn’t say anything at first and when I look up, his facial expression is contorted with worry.
“What is it? What’s wrong?” I say.
Wade shakes his head and forces a smile. “It’s nothing.”
“Are you sure, because it kinda seems like something.”
“I’m just—worried for you is all. Necromancy is a big deal. It’s not a power that’s easy to shoulder,” he says.
“I don’t have to do it alone. I have you,” I say, watching his every movement.
Holding still at first, he finally nods. “You do,” he whispers.
“Then that’s all that matters. Come on, let’s go for a drive. We’ve been trapped in this town for the past few days. I think we need some time away from all of this. Let’s go back to Windhaven for the night. I’m sure the estate stuff can wait until another day,” I say, dropping my arms so I can slide a hand into his.
“I like the sound of that,” he says, trying to force his lips into a smile.
“Good, because you don’t get a choice,” I say, turning on my heel and leading the way back to Blue.
We both climb into our seats, but Wade stares at the columbarium in silence.
“Do you need more time?” I ask, my hand poised on the keys in the ignition.
He shakes his head. “No, I’m good. There’s nothing left for me here.”
My heart breaks a little for him, knowing that whatever is going on must be tearing him up inside. I just wish he’d let me in…
Slipping the car into drive, I pull out of the cemetery and out onto the road. I turn on some music and lower the windows to allow the scent of fall to wash away the lily fragrance still lingering in the cab of my vehicle.
We drive in silence, each of us wrapped up in our own thoughts and worries. If there’s one thing I’ve learned in all of this, it’s that we should hold tight to those we love…not push them further away. You never know when your time together could be cut short.
The farther north we drive, many of the trees still hold tight to their leaves. It’s like a resurrection in and of itself. The bright reds, yellows, and oranges all mix together in a blazing array of life’s final breath.
The Windhaven Witches Omnibus Edition : Complete Paranormal Suspense Series, Books 1-4 Page 24