by Vicki Beeby
He didn’t hear what she said to the audience. He walked straight to the room where he had left his music and violin case and packed it away. Then he picked it up and walked out into the passage leading to the hall. He nearly ran into a distinguished looking man in late middle age.
The man took Milan’s hand and shook it vigorously. ‘Splendid performance,’ he said. ‘Takes me back to hearing that piece performed by Yehudi Menuin.’ Then he fumbled in his pocket. ‘I’d love to talk to you, but I’ve got my own performance to prepare for, and I’ve got to dash off at the end. Another engagement, you know.’ Milan, his thoughts still in turmoil after his performance couldn’t really take in what was happening. He just nodded and muttered something in reply, he hardly knew what. Then the man pulled something from his pocket and handed it to him. Milan saw it was the man’s card. The name ‘Douglas Murray’ was printed on it in elegant copperplate. It rang a bell, but Milan wasn’t able to place it. ‘I’d very much like to talk to you,’ Douglas Murray said. ‘Get in touch when you have a moment.’
Milan nodded, scarcely taking in what Murray had said. He put the card in his pocket and then he was heading for the hall to the door while Murray went backstage.
He pushed the encounter to the back of his mind as he took his seat. His head was too full of Jess to spare a thought for anyone else.
The decision that had occurred to him on stage remained unchanged. He needed to give her time. If she truly loved him, she would not toy with his affections. He would tell her what he had decided after the concert.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Jess watched the two acts following Milan in a daze. She had chosen well to place him third in the billing. A large proportion of the audience had only come to see Leo, so putting a star performer that early on had made people sit up and take notice. Fewer people had been watching Leo while Milan played – Milan had grabbed their attention.
Jess had known he was an accomplished violinist but somehow, seeing him play for an audience, she knew she was seeing him in his element for the first time. It was something of a wake-up call. She’d only known him as a fighter pilot. Although she’d known he must have had a different life in Czechoslovakia, it was only seeing him come to life on stage and pour his spirit into his performance that she recognised his true calling. A deep sorrow twisted her at the fresh realisation of what the war had taken from him.
Jess emerged from her daze in time to see Kathleen finish her solo to loud applause. She watched her friend take her bow with warmth swelling in her chest. She was so pleased for Kathleen to see her taking more interest in life again. Although the loss of her son would be a grief she never truly recovered from, Jess hoped she would be able to be more engaged with the world from now on and reconnect with her friends. She beamed at Kathleen as they passed each other on the stage and was rewarded by a broad grin in return.
The rest of the concert passed in a blur. It was a huge success, and the audience loved every minute of it. Jess was secretly pleased that although Douglas Murray gave a brilliant rendition of a Chopin piano solo, he didn’t get more applause than Milan. Of course, the moment the whole audience had been waiting for was Leonard Steele’s act. He, together with two other members of the RAF Film Unit sang ‘Three Little Maids’ from the Mikado, complete with much coy fluttering of fans and surprisingly tuneful high-pitched voices. The audience gave them a standing ovation as they minced off the stage, Leo blowing kisses to the women in the audience over the top of his fan.
Jess wiped tears of laughter from her eyes as she walked back out onto the stage to thank everyone and announce the final total raised. She had just finished speaking when she was surprised to see Leo stride onto the stage holding a huge bouquet of flowers. ‘One last thank you before we all leave,’ he said, speaking in a carrying voice that easily reached the back of the crowded hall. ‘I can’t let you all go without asking everyone to show their appreciation for this wonderful young lady who organised the whole thing and has given us such a delightful evening.’
Even as Jess acknowledged the applause and admired the flowers, she couldn’t help a stab of resentment at the proprietorial way he referred to the show. He spoke as though he had been one of the organisers instead of simply turning up to perform his act.
Leonard held up his hands; the applause died down. ‘I also can’t let you go without making an announcement I’ve been dying to share with the world for some time. Ladies and gentlemen, I’m so proud and delighted to announce my engagement to this beautiful woman. Jess Halloway has consented to become Mrs Leonard Steele.’
Jess felt the blood drain from her face. A sort of happy sigh seemed to surge through the audience, and a ripple of applause broke out. A bright light flashed, making spots of colour dance in front of her eyes. So that was why he had been so eager to take part in the concert. Not because he felt the slightest bit of concern for the poor people who had lost their homes but so that he could ambush her with this announcement. Another flash of light. It took a moment for her to work out that it must have been a photographer. Leo had clearly tipped off a reporter. It was that realisation that brought the power of movement back to her limbs. She was nearly overcome with the urge to beat Leo over the head with her bouquet. That would give the reporter something to write about. However, while it would be satisfying in the short term, she knew that humiliating a well-known actor in front of the press would not endear her to the very people she would need to impress should she try to pick up her acting career after the war. The image of her beating Leo over the head until he was covered in petals and the bouquet was reduced to bare stalks was so strong, a mad urge to laugh welled up inside her. She used it to turn a beaming smile upon the audience. A fraction of a second later, a third flash dazzled her. When the blotches in front of her eyes cleared, most of the audience was a blur. The only faces that stood out were the worried ones of Evie, May, Alex and Peter and the stony expression of Milan’s.
A hush fell over the audience, and she knew everyone was waiting for her to say something.
Leo put an arm around her shoulders. ‘Look at her. She’s so shocked, she doesn’t know what to say. She begged me not to make a fuss, but I couldn’t resist.’
This wasn’t entirely true. She had a few choice words she would love to say. However, saying them in such a public way would result in her being hauled in front of her CO, charged with actions unbecoming to an officer. She couldn’t see the reporter but knew he must be there, pen poised to take down every word she said. It gave her an idea.
Her face aching from maintaining her smile, she turned to Leo but pitched her voice for the audience to hear. ‘I only asked you not to make a fuss because I didn’t want anyone to forget the real reason for the show, which is to raise money for the victims of the bombings. And even though he asked me to keep it secret, I’m sure he won’t mind me saying that Leo—’ she turned to the audience with a self-deprecating smile as though embarrassed by her slip at referring to Leo in such a familiar way ‘—I mean, Leonard Steele, has agreed to donate the generous sum of one hundred pounds to the cause. I asked for a donation in place of an engagement ring.’
The audience gave a murmur of approval and another ripple of applause filled the hall. Jess turned back to Leo and felt a stab of satisfaction at the flicker of alarm in his eyes. He controlled his expression immediately and turned a fond smile to the audience. ‘That’s the girl I’m going to marry. Isn’t she wonderful?’
After yet more applause, Jess said to the audience. ‘Thank you all for coming and for raising money for such an important cause.’
There was a buzz of chatter and the scraping of chairs as people rose and fumbled with coats and hats. Jess dragged Leo to the side of the stage. The moment they were out of sight, she rounded on him. ‘How dare you? I have friends in the audience. My superior officers. Milan’s here. Did it ever occur to you to consider how your clever little stunt would affect me?’
‘You’ll sort it out.’ Now they
weren’t being watched, Leo’s smile disappeared to be replaced by a scowl. ‘And if you were going to lecture me on pulling stunts, you should have done it before pulling one on me. How selfish can you get?’
‘Selfish? If I was being selfish, I would have demanded the ring as well. Imagine what a good story that would have made for you, not only making the donation but buying me the perfect sapphire ring.’
Leo acted like he hadn’t heard her. ‘You know I was having money problems, yet I can’t back out. Imagine the bad publicity.’
‘Bad publicity? I’ll give you bad publicity. The next time you try ambushing me, just remember how interested the press would be to meet your six-year-old daughter.’
The shock on Leo’s face brought her to herself. What had she done? She’d sworn never to breathe a word of Hannah’s existence to Leo.
Leo’s expression twisted into a sneer. ‘You’re lying. If this is an attempt to wangle more money out of me, you can forget it.’
Jess forced a smile. ‘Course I am. You can’t blame a girl for trying. Now get out of my way. I need to see my friends and start undoing the damage you’ve caused.’
She pushed past him and marched back out onto the stage and down the steps. From the corner of her eye, she saw Evie and May approach. Yet they could wait. She pushed past the members of the audience who were still lingering, probably hoping for a last glimpse of Leo. She remembered to fix the smile back on her face and gave them polite nods when they called out their congratulations. She hardly glanced in their direction, though. All her attention was focused on Milan. Please don’t let him have gone already.
Then she saw him. He had moved aside to let people past but he showed no sign of leaving. His greatcoat was still draped over the back of his chair and the violin under his seat. Some of her fear eased as she hurried over. If he was going to leave without speaking to her, he would have done it already.
‘I swear I had no idea Leo was going to do that,’ she said the moment she was close enough to speak without being overheard.
‘He is using you,’ Milan said. ‘I warned you he would do something like this.’
‘I know.’ She folded her arms, hugging her stomach in a futile attempt to ease the knot of anxiety. After a quick glance behind her to make sure no one was within earshot, she lowered her voice and said, ‘That’s not the worst of it, though. I was so angry with him I let slip about Hannah.’
Milan’s eyes widened. ‘What did he say?’
‘He thought I was lying. Trying to force more money out of him. I didn’t correct him.’ She glanced over her shoulder again, schooling her face into a calm expression to make it appear she was simply thanking Milan for taking part. ‘But what if he thinks it over and wonders if I was telling the truth?’
Milan squeezed her arm. ‘What can he do? Even if he sees Hannah, he cannot be sure she is his.’
Jess reeled as though she had been slapped. ‘You… you think there was someone else apart from Leo?’
‘What? No. That is not what I meant.’
‘Then what did you mean?’ Jess felt her anger flare up. ‘Because it sounded to me like you thought Leo might not be the father.’
Aware that her indignation had caused her to raise her voice, she looked round again only to see the hall was empty. She had arranged to meet Evie, May and their respective boyfriends at the Abercorn; clearly they had already gone on. ‘Come on,’ she said. ‘The janitor must be waiting to lock up.’ She went to fetch her greatcoat.
‘Jess, you know I believe you. I meant Hannah looks nothing like Leo. She looks like you.’ Milan offered her his arm as they made their way through the dark streets to the Abercorn. Jess was tempted to ignore it then slipped her hand into the crook of his elbow, not wishing to appear churlish. Besides, dark clouds covered the night sky, making it dangerous to walk without taking extra care. She knew she had overreacted to Milan’s clumsy comment but she couldn’t seem to shake off the hurt it had caused.
‘I know. Ignore me. I’m angry with Leo, not you.’
‘I will not ignore you, either. How can I ignore the fact that I have the most beautiful woman in the world with me?’
Jess spared him a smile even though she knew he wouldn’t be able to see it. ‘Thank you.’ After a few more steps she remembered their earlier conversation. ‘There was something you wanted to say to me before.’
She heard Milan give a heavy sigh. ‘It is not good timing. It can wait.’
‘No. I’ve gone on about myself all evening. It’s your turn.’
Silence for a few more steps, then: ‘I do not want you to take this the wrong way.’
‘How will I know what the right way is unless you tell me?’
‘Very well. I have already told you that Jiří’s family live in the area of Prague that was bombed?’
Jess nodded before remembering he could not see her. ‘Yes. How is he taking it?’
‘Not well.’
‘I’m sorry. Tell him I’m thinking of him, won’t you?’ She had always been fond of Jiří and it broke her heart to think of the young man being unable to get word of his family to discover if they were even still alive.
‘I will. But listen. The war will be over soon. A matter of weeks now, they say. I have promised Jiří I will go to Prague with him as soon as we are able. He must look for his family and I must find mine. We will support each other.’
Jess clutched Milan’s arm feeling suddenly light-headed. ‘When are you coming back?’
‘I do not know. Travel will not be easy. I will do my best to return when I can.’
‘Of course.’ Jess felt sick. He was lining up his excuses, she was sure of it. He had been looking for a way out ever since he had found out about Hannah. It was why he had never spoken of their future together. How ironic when, after she had been the one to hold back from a commitment and make Milan do the chasing, he was now trying to end it with her. He would do it gently, she knew, because he was a kind man. He would go to Prague. Then would come the letter saying his sister needed him and he must stay longer in Czechoslovakia. He would suggest she shouldn’t wait for him because it wouldn’t be fair on her. He would sound regretful when really she knew it would be a relief. Because she was damaged goods.
Chapter Twenty-Four
As the weeks went on, spring arrived in full force. The days grew longer and sunnier so the girls were able to enjoy the gardens at Hill House once more. Although they were still busy in the Filter Room, the flights they were tracking were friendly. No V2s had fallen since March. While the atmosphere in the Filter Room could never be described as relaxed, the tense buzz of the days of flying bombs and V2s was absent. As each day passed with no enemy aircraft it became more evident that Germany had now retreated beyond even the range of V2s.
‘It looks like you might be having a peacetime wedding,’ May said to Evie one afternoon. It was late April, and the warm sunshine and gentle breeze had beckoned them out of doors on their free day. They had gone for a walk on the common and wandered through glades carpeted with bluebells, breathing deeply to take in their soapy-sweet scent and gazing up at the blue sky through the fresh green haze of newly unfurled leaves. Finally, they had retreated to Brewers Ponds – the large pool at the southern edge of the common – and sprawled on the bank. As she listened to the tapping of woodpeckers and the soporific cooing of wood pigeons, Jess had a sense of the weight of six years of war lifting from her shoulders. As May implied, the feeling was that the war would be over in a matter of days. Every day the papers carried fresh news of the latest city to be liberated.
‘I hope so.’ Evie plucked a long strand of grass and twirled it between her fingers. ‘I mean, with Alex working in Intelligence, there isn’t the same worry as when he was flying, but I’m glad it looks like we’ll be married in peacetime. It feels like a more propitious start to our marriage, somehow.’
As ever, when Evie spoke of Alex her face lit with a soft smile. Jess couldn’t help smiling back at the sig
ht of her friend so happy.
However, Jess’s happiness at the prospect of an end to hostilities was more complicated. As every day brought them a step closer to peace, Jess felt a growing weight on her heart. Soon Milan would be free to return to Czechoslovakia. The closer they came to their parting, the more Jess knew she didn’t want him to leave.
* * *
Two days later the girls came into the anteroom at Bentley Manor to find the other off-duty officers gathered around Laura Morgan.
‘What’s happening?’ Jess asked as she joined the group.
Laura Morgan turned to face Jess, her eyes shining. ‘It’s been announced on German radio that Hitler has died in action. I’ve just got in from the Filter Room, and the Controller heard it direct from the Air Vice Marshall.’
‘No way,’ Jess breathed. ‘Then it really is all over.’
‘Not quite. Dönitz is president now, and he hasn’t surrendered yet. They think he will announce it soon, though.’
After so many months of watching what had felt like the Allies’ agonisingly slow advance across Europe since D-Day, everything seemed to happen very fast after that. Two days later, Dönitz announced Germany’s surrender, and German troops around Europe laid down their arms. The officers of No. 2 WAAF Officers’ Mess got into the habit of having the radio on low in the anteroom throughout broadcasting hours, waiting for an announcement they were sure must come soon. Then late in the evening on May the 7th, the radio programme was interrupted with a news flash, announcing that the war in Europe was over. The next day would be Victory in Europe Day, a public holiday.
Spontaneous cheers rang so loudly in the anteroom that the glasses, cups and saucers upon the tables rattled. Suddenly everyone was laughing and hugging. Laura Morgan went to the ancient gramophone and put on a record. Glenn Miller’s ‘In The Mood’ blared across the room.