At lunch period the next day, Genna was lecturing me on how to behave more like a sophisticated high school student, now that middle school was almost done. I can’t even begin to deal. I was just starting to feel sort of maybe okay about the whole middle school thing, and now I have to start over again at the bottom in high school. Ugh. Anyway, apparently I have to get some sort of “hairstyle” before ninth grade begins in the fall, which Genna does not understand is contrary to the laws of physics. If only she had to walk a day in my frizz.
Genna agreed that the Shoe Episode, as we now called it, was a clear sign that Jonathan was falling in love with me, and it was only a matter of time before we made it official. This, she says, is the key to my success in high school. Arriving with a BF. Apparently it’s a guaranteed social in. Okay, I conveniently left out the part of the story where Jonathan followed Beth around like a pathetic puppy dog. At least in Genna’s world, a romance between me and hottie Barista Boy was still possible.
The Ten-Step Program for Becoming a Gorgeous Goddess
by Annie Green and Genna Matthews
1. Brush, floss, and apply tooth whitener every day until teeth look like Chiclets.
2. Do crunches, lunges, and yoga poses four times a week so as to acquire long, lean muscles and gymnastlike flexibility.
3. Eat healthy food like nuts, berries, fish, whole grains, green veggies, yogurt, avocadoes, tomatoes, etc. No more Funyuns!
4. Learn to belly dance.
5. Stop pulling dental floss from nose to mouth to make people laugh at school.
6. Convince parents to pay for subscriptions to at least four respected fashion periodicals.
7. Paint nails more often.
8. Apply mint mask to face to get rid of nature’s cruel jokes.
9. Smile mysteriously.
10. Practice Scarlett Johansson–style deep voice.
“I want to see the dental-floss trick again,” Zoe said when we presented her with the list. She was eating pizza with a knife and fork, which Genna and I were used to by now. Even when we were little she used a fork to eat the barely bite-sized muffins Louisa made at the Leaf.
“No way. That has been retired.” Genna spoke with finality. “Annie never did that anyway. Suburban legend.”
“I did so. Sixth-grade spring field trip. But don’t worry. I didn’t bring any floss to school.”
“Good.”
“Let’s see, I’ve got pizza, you’ve got mac and cheese, and is that a taco, Annie?” Zoe was laughing at our weak goddess resolve. The three of us weren’t exactly the healthiest eaters. At least Zo also had a sliced apple and a Powerbar before her.
“I didn’t say it would happen overnight. You’ve got to ease into being a goddess.” Genna said this like a respected psychiatrist on Oprah.
“That’s right. Too much healthy food at once would be a shock to my system,” I added. And then I smiled mysteriously and pouted my lips.
“You two are crazy. Oh, whoops. I have a tennis thing. We’re supposed to be eating together.” Zoe grabbed her pizza slice, apple, and Powerbar and sped off. “See yas.”
“Oh, yeah. I’m supposed to be helping Miss Keltcher in the art room. I promised I’d clean up at lunch. It was wild times with the pottery wheels today.” Genna tossed her mac and cheese into the garbage and smoothed her pencil skirt. “We’ll try to make it to the shop later.”
“Wait!” I wanted to talk more about the Leaf but didn’t know what to say. I knew Gen and Zo wouldn’t like the drastic changes we had made. After it was out of my mouth, I tried to think of something to say as Genna paused. “Um, never mind. Have fun getting clay off the ceiling.”
When I was done with my taco, I walked up to the front of the cafeteria to clean my tray and Zach tripped me.
“Hey, neighbor,” he said with a salute.
“Hey what?” I replied, resisting the urge to “accidentally” spill the rest of my milk on him.
“You, me, neighbors. Don’tcha remember, Green? It’s official. I’m moving to your street. I know, I know, you’re speechless with joy. I’d much rather not live among the plebes, but what can you do? My inheritance hasn’t kicked in yet.”
“Zach, I am not even dealing with you right now. Stay out of the Leaf.” I brushed past him as his friends hooted and laughed.
That’s all I needed; for my new best customer to be Zach Anderson.
GENNA’S
TEA GODDESS BEAUTY TIPS
1. RINSE DARK HAIR WITH BLACK TEA ONCE A WEEK TO ADD SHININESS.
2. RINSE LIGHT HAIR WITH CHAMOMILE TEA TO MAKE HIGHLIGHTS DAZZLE-Y.
3. AFTER YOU WASH YOUR FACE, PUT SOME COOL WHITE TEA ONTO A COTTON BALL AND SMOOTH OVER THE SKIN LIKE AN ASTRINGENT TO PREVENT ZITS.
4. IF YOU GET A ZIT ANYWAY, PUT A USED TEA BAG RIGHT ON IT AND HOLD FOR A WHILE. DON’T RINSE OFF THE TEA.
Chapter Eleven
Bring me a cup of tea and the Times.
—QUEEN VICTORIA’S FIRST COMMAND
UPON HER ASCENSION TO THE THRONE
To celebrate the changes at the Steeping Leaf, Jonathan printed a banner that said TURNING OVER A NEW LEAF. I looked at it and hoped that today would be the day the shop would actually be busy for once. It was almost a week after all the renovations, scarily close to my eighth-grade graduation at the start of June. I am sad to report there have been no more Shoe Episodes and a tea craze has not swept Madison, Wisconsin. To make matters worse, Zach has come in twice to bother me and threaten to report us to the health department (which is crazy, the health department loves us). At least my grandmother looked happy to see me.
“Hi, Annie.”
“Hey, Louisa. How’s your day going?”
“Oh, I don’t know. I think my planets are out of alignment. The regulars don’t like our new shop. Mr. Silverman understands why we made the changes, but when I asked him for an honest opinion, he wrinkled his nose. And I haven’t seen Mr. and Mrs. Kopinski or their matching outfits since the day they saw the updates and asked if I’d sold the place. The yoga ladies stopped coming by after their afternoon class, and even the robin seems to have abandoned her nest.” Louisa looked very worried.
“They don’t like it at all?” I had to admit, I wasn’t that surprised.
“No. Or our new prices.”
“Yikes.” What had we done?
“Oh good, there are Ling and Hieu. I haven’t seen them since the teething fit. You want to go open the door for her, dear?” Ling was pushing the stroller and Hieu was actually smiling. I opened the door so Ling could leave him buckled in.
“Hi there, Ling. How are you?” She looked much better, rested even.
“Good afternoon, Annie. Thanks. I’m doing well, how are you?”
“I’m good.” I saw Ling notice the changes in the shop, taking everything in slowly. “Am I in the right store?”
“Yes. We did a little, ah, remodeling last weekend.”
“I see that. Wow.” She parked the stroller by the counter and looked around. “Hi there, Louisa.”
“Ling, hello. How did the herbs work out?”
“Oh, perfectly. Thank you so much. Hieu is practically a different child. Well, this week anyway. I’ve started bracing for the terrible twos. I sure hope there is an herb for those!” Louisa and Ling laughed knowingly together, but I couldn’t help noticing that Ling hadn’t said anything at all about the new paint and furniture. I wondered if she was sticking to the old If you can’t say anything nice, don’t saying anything at all rule. I decided not to ask. Instead, I prepared Ling’s cucumber sandwich order so she could chat with Louisa about their respective gardens. It was almost time to plant tomatoes, apparently.
After Ling and Hieu left, I asked Louisa if she had said anything about the “New Leaf.”
“Well, not exactly. Just that she was glad we hadn’t changed the cucumber sandwiches at all.”
“Hmm,” was all I said in reply. I guess I wasn’t the only one in the world who wasn’t fond of changes.
“Annie, love, I think I’m going to go over a few things in back. Are you all right handling the counter on your own?”
“Sure.”
Louisa went back into the storeroom. Today, I was supposed to be working with Jonathan, but after he arrived, he kept disappearing into the back room to make our inventory “more efficient.” I was spending more time daydreaming about him than actually talking to him. He seemed even more distant than usual. Guys were impossible to understand. I could tell that he was disappointed. The New Leaf scheme wasn’t turning into the business miracle he thought it would.
Just as I was about to say something brilliant (or as close to brilliant as was possible under the circumstances, like, “I see you like milk in your tea”), he went and clocked out, grumbling about the slow customer traffic.
The shop was in its typical late-afternoon quiet time, which seemed worse now that there weren’t even any houseplants to talk to. I straightened the tables and made sure everything was fully stocked. Since I was allowed to study, I pulled out my science book to review for our test on plate tectonics. It was actually kind of a cool chapter; I know, I am a total nerd. I was almost done going over the chapter review section when Genna and Zoe came in. I grinned at them.
Genna was dressed in tight jeans and red shoes that buckled over her ankle. An orange newsboy cap sat on her head, and she had her art portfolio under her arm. Zoe looked comfortable in white shorts and Pumas, her long black hair smooth behind a headband. It was tough having such gorgeous friends when I was stuck in my barista apron. “Teashop Girls reunion!” Genna shouted, taking her place center stage as usual.
“Okay, we went weeks without bugging you at work,” Zoe announced, a little apologetically. “Now I want to see if you can really make that time machine thingy work.” She pointed her finger at the chrome espresso machine.
“I am the espresso wizard. We’re pals, he and I.” I patted the machine with affection and leaned on the counter in front of my friends. We were, at the moment, the only three people in the store.
“Okay, I know it’s been a while, but what happened to this place? It looks so different.” Zoe touched the empty shelves and plopped herself into one of the uncomfortable chairs and made a face. I remembered the three of us in the old chairs, our feet not even close to the ground. Louisa had always been careful to make us the mild tea in those days, only steeping it a bit and adding lots of cream and sugar. I wondered if she still had some of those miniature tea sets around.
“Yeah, it was Jonathan’s idea. He said we had to join the twenty-first century.”
“Seriously? This?” she said, gesturing. “And you want him? Why?”
“Did you, like, lock the door or something?” Genna looked around. “It’s deserted.”
“No, but I should’ve.” I put away my homework; it was a lost cause now. Genna didn’t believe in homework, and Zoe always did hers in study hall or late at night when normal, nonsuperheroes were sleeping. “What can I get for you?”
“What can I get for you? Aww, you sound just like a pro!”
“Yeah …” I totally did. I smiled.
“Um, how about some of that red tea to match my shoes. You like?” Genna stuck her foot up near the counter. Zoe held out an arm to steady her.
“Gen, I swear you are going to break something.” Zoe turned to me. “I’ll take an English breakfast.”
“’Kay.” I poured the drinks and leaned against the counter while Gen and Zo sat.
“I forgot how much I missed this place. Remember when I tried to catch a lightning bug out front when we were ten?”
“You were trying to impress some dumb boy,” Zoe reminded her. “And almost mushed the poor thing. Gross.” It was true. I laughed. I was glad that had been Genna’s first and last experiment with the area wildlife.
“Speaking of dumb guys, ask Venus Williams here what happened at tennis practice.” Genna sipped her tea and gestured to Zoe. “But wait, where is your guy? I thought the whole reason you loved this job was because you could breathe the same air as Barista Boy all day.”
“That is not the whole reason. I’m helping my grandmother.”
“Right.”
“Well, he isn’t here that much as it turns out. I guess he must have a paper due or something. We’ve exchanged about three meaningful sentences since the Shoe Episode. You think I should wear something, you know, cuter?”
“Yes,” Genna said.
“No,” Zoe replied at exactly the same time.
“Anyway, what happened to you today at tennis?” I changed the subject. It was pointless to talk about Jonathan since there had been exactly zero developments in that department and whenever I did see him, he steered the conversation to Beth. Ugh. Zoe looked embarrassed at the question, which was weird.
“All right. You know we had that pretournament scrimmage today? Ugh, this chair sucks.” Zoe shifted in the hard chair and glared at it. “Anyway, the guys’ tennis team against the girls’? I had to play Zach Anderson, of course.”
“Mmm, icky.” Zach deserved to have his butt handed to him. Zoe was perfectly capable of doing it, too, so I was wondering why she looked so miserable.
“Yeah. Anyway, in the middle of the second set, he starts with the foot faults. We didn’t have a line judge because it was a scrimmage. I called him on some of them, and he said I was just worried he was going to win. I tried to ignore him, but he just kept pushing me and pushing me. So I nailed him with a serve when he wasn’t looking. Of course, that’s the moment when his coach walks over. Zach whined so loud about how much it hurt and how he was calling his dad’s lawyer that my coach had to agree to take me off the roster for the tournament. So now some poor bench sitter has to play number one singles. I’m an idiot.” Zoe sucked on her drink. “My stepdad is going to be so mad at me. I think I’m getting a stomachache.”
“Not fair! He was asking for it.”
“I know. He totally was. But I have to learn to control my temper. So says my coach. She is peeved.” Zoe looked down and started picking at the skin around her fingernails, which was raw.
“But your coach doesn’t have to put up with Zach on a daily basis. Half the school must’ve cheered when you clocked him.” I was upset. The tournament was a big deal. Zoe had been talking about it for two weeks. Last year, she lost in the final round and felt this was the chance to go all the way. Zach should’ve been supportive; Zoe represented his school and his tennis program. There was no reason for him to cheat. What a jerk.
“Yeah. But there isn’t much I can do about it now.”
“We could egg his house,” Genna offered.
“Nah. That wouldn’t get me in the match.” Zoe looked defeated. Her thumb was starting to bleed from all the picking.
“But I’d feel better,” Genna said.
“We need to fix this; it isn’t right. TSGs do not get pushed around.” I couldn’t stand to see Zoe so bummed out. “Zach should go to the coaches and explain what happened. I’m sure if you apologized to him, they’d figure something out.” I chewed on a pencil, trying to figure out how best to butter him up.
“Uh-oh, you’ve awakened the little Wonder Barista,” Genna said. “Annie, why don’t you pay off the national debt and solve global warming while you’re at it?”
“Ha-ha.”
Genna started pulling out her artwork. “You think Louisa would let me hang some of these up? You know, like, for sale?”
“Gen, since when is a picture of your thumb art?” Zoe peered at the first drawing. I grinned. I never really “got” Genna’s more conceptual art, just as I never understood why we had to start school at 7:35 a.m. Or why some women got eyeliner tattooed permanently on their faces.
“Um, hello. Since I painted the nail with a pagoda. See?”
“You think someone is going to buy that?”
“Sure. It’s original. And look how detailed!”
“Uh-uh. I’m sure some Madison art-buyer is just dying to hang up a pictur
e of your big thumb in their living room.”
“They totally are. Anyway, back to Zach. How do we punish him?” Genna looked at me expectantly.
“Well, we could make a gift of a certain thumb drawing …” Zoe offered as I giggled. Genna stuck out her tongue. “Aww, we like your pictures, Gen. Just put them here and I’ll ask Louisa later. As for Zach, we definitely need a list.” I flipped over the blackboard listing the tea of the day to reveal the whiteboard on the back and eagerly uncapped my dry-erase marker.
“Uh-oh, Louisa lets you have access to a whiteboard and dry-erase marker? How many lists have you made since you started?” Zoe demanded.
“Oh, one or two a day. I’m trying to limit myself. But Louisa says she’s never been so on top of inventory. All right. Here we go. MAKING ZACH ANDERSON SORRY HE IS ALIVE AND/OR GETTING ZOE BACK INTO TOURNAMENT.” I started writing superfast as Genna gave suggestions.
1. Put a few sushi rolls deep in his locker.
“Genna!” Zoe said, aghast. “We just figured out about the moldy subs; obviously the boy is hard of smelling.”
“Hey, she wrote it down.”
“We are in a brainstorming phase,” I said. “Seriously, though. Less grossness, Genna.”
“Whatever.”
2. Circulate a petition to reinstate Zoe.
“Annie, you circulate a petition every other week. I think people are getting tired of it.”
“They are not.”
3. Bribe him with homework answers.
4. Stage a school walkout in protest of Zoe’s punishment.
5. Cast a voodoo spell on him.
6. Start a rumor that he still sleeps with his blankie.
The Teashop Girls Page 7