“Abby!” I called loudly. When she turned her head in my direction, I waved her over. She whispered with her friend for a second, and they rerouted. “Long time no see.” I patted the spot on my right. “Have a seat. Unless you’re still mad?”
Abby squinted at me, then looked back at the brunette. Her friend nodded. Abby’s jaw tensed. The friend’s nostrils flared. Abby’s brow scrunched up. They were clearly arguing without words. After a few more exuberant expressions, the friend cocked her head to the side. “We’d love to join you,” she answered, taking the seat across from me, next to Garland’s plate.
Abby huffed and gave her foot the tiniest stomp. It was like déjà vu. Garland had done the same thing not sixty seconds ago. Only on a much grander scale. She walked around the table. “I’m not mad anymore. But I have a feeling I might be by the time we’re done.”
“Oh, ye of little faith.” I grinned, and Abby’s mouth twitched.
The brunette watched us carefully, trying to puzzle out what was going on. Eventually, she interrupted our staring match and cleared her throat. “I’m Abby’s roommate, Samantha. Most people call me Sam. And you would be?”
“Evan,” I replied in a smooth voice, using the womanizer for the second time today. This time it went over much better.
Sam flashed me her pearly whites, and a dimple popped out in her left cheek. “Ah, so you’re the infamous Evan.”
I quirked an eyebrow at Abby. “You’re already talking about me? I must have made quite the impression.” Abby grimaced as she bit into her hamburger and ignored my comment.
“You’re the guy who called her flat-chested.” Sam laughed. “I’d definitely say you made an impression.”
I gasped in outrage and held up my index finger. “To be fair, she called herself flat-chested. I only agreed.”
Garland snorted. He’d walked up just in time to hear the last part of the conversation. “Who’s flat-chested?” he asked, dropping in the chair across from Abby and next to Sam. His unabashed candor frequently caused inadvertent impropriety.
“Abby’s flat-chested,” Sam replied casually, as if we were talking about our classes or the weather.
“Who’s Abby?”
Sam nodded across the table. Garland glanced at Abby, shrugged, and popped open a new can of soda. “She looks fine to me,” he announced. I happened to agree, and apparently Sam did, too, because her face grew smug.
Abby’s face, however, was ten shades of red. She freaked out before I could jump to her defense. “Oh my gosh! I’ll never live this down. I’m gonna go crawl in a hole now.”
She grabbed her food and pushed her chair back from the table, ready to leave. She didn’t look that mad, though; more like embarrassed and annoyed. I slung my arm around her shoulder and pulled her close to my side.
“Don’t go,” I begged. I gave her a penitent smile and my best puppy-dog eyes.
“So much for your promise to behave,” she grumbled.
“Hey, I didn’t even say anything!” I argued with a stern glare across the table.
“Maybe not,” she conceded, glowering at her roommate, “but apparently there are other people I need to be worried about now.”
Sam stuck out her bottom lip. “I’m done. Seriously, I’ll be good. I promise.”
Garland had been watching with amusement as the scene unfolded. “Well, I make no promises to behave. I don’t even know who you two are.”
“Sorry,” I replied. “Garland, this is Abby, the afore mentioned partner in my plan to overthrow our student government.” I squeezed her tightly, then let go. “And this is her roommate, Sam, whom I met five seconds before you came back.” I looked between the girls and nodded across the table. “Ladies, my roommate, Garland.”
Abby’s brow furrowed while she looked him over. “I remind you of him?” she squeaked incredulously. I could tell she was referring to their physical characteristics, the one area where they were complete opposites.
Abby was petite, probably five-three or four and a hundred pounds, give or take. Garland had the broad shoulders of a swimmer and was well over six feet. Her blonde/blue combo was a stark contrast to Garland’s auburn hair and brown eyes. While Abby had fair skin and freckles all over her nose, Garland was surprisingly tan for a redhead.
Garland gave her a playful scoff. “I feel like I should be offended by your reaction, but I’m not sure why…”
“No!” Abby gasped, mortified by the accidental insult. “You’re very handsome,” she rushed on. “Just not what I expected, given how alike Evan said we were.”
“Yes,” Sam agreed, with a glimpse at Abby and a dangerous smile. “You’re very handsome.” Abby’s lips pursed. I was afraid the pink stain on her cheeks would become permanently tattooed after today.
Garland puffed up his chest in pride. It was a false bravado, but he was a performer. And he never missed a chance to put on a show. Taking a bow, he said, “I’m deeply touched that you both recognize my handsomeness is far superior to Evan’s…”
“Hey,” I complained. “That’s not what they said.”
“Yes,” he rebutted, “but that’s clearly what they meant.” He was being so dramatic that nobody would have mistaken his attitude for true cockiness. “And I’d like you both to know that I’m now accepting applications for female companionship. Make sure when you fill out the form to specify whether you’re seeking friendship, romance, or other.”
Sam snickered. I rolled my eyes. Abby asked, “What does other mean?” His ridiculous comment had taken the focus off her, and she relaxed slightly.
Garland’s lips puckered. He scratched his temple. “Don’t know. Nobody’s filled out the application yet.” He grinned and Abby smiled back—that same cute, bashful smile she’d given me earlier today.
Inspiration hit me like the crack of a whip. My mind started racing. I don’t know why I hadn’t thought of it earlier. Garland and Abby would be the perfect couple. Their sense of humor was a spot-on match. Garland would make her laugh, which would boost his ego. And Abby was the perfect mix of sweet and reserved, just like he wanted. Plus, she was freaking adorable. Especially when she got flustered. It made you want to cuddle her like a teddy bear.
I started formulating a plan. I’d have to talk him up to her and find ways for them to “bump into” each other. Maybe I could get her and Sam to eat with us again. Or I could invite her over for dance committee business, then conveniently find a reason to disappear, leaving her and Garland alone together. Suddenly, I was bursting with ideas. I found a new desire to re-enter the dating world. Only this time it wouldn’t be as a participant. I’d be playing Cupid.
“If I give you my e-mail address, will you send us a copy?” Sam asked.
“Of the application?” He shook his head. “Sorry, I can’t.”
She frowned. “Why not?”
“It’s only available as a text message.”
“Must not be very thorough,” Abby pointed out.
“No,” I quipped. “That’s code for I don’t actually have an application.”
“Do too,” he argued.
“Oh yeah? Prove it.”
“Here.” Sam thrust her phone at him. “You can send it to me. Put in your number.”
Garland hesitated. He hadn’t expected the girls to do more than laugh at his joke, and it backfired. Now he had to follow through. Heaven forbid the situation ended in a real date. I might die of shock. Of course, at this rate it’d be a date with the wrong girl. I’d have to pull Sam aside after dinner and let her know Garland was unofficially spoken for.
He entered his number into Sam’s phone. She texted him, then waited expectantly. “What? You want me to send it now?” He croaked.
“Duh.” She shook her head.
He sighed and started typing. It felt like forever before he pushed the send button. The chime on Sam’s phone rang out. She swiped at the screen and opened the text, her lips moving as she read. The smile on her face grew wide, and she started to gi
ggle. “That’s it?”
“Does there need to be more?”
Sam thought for a moment. “I guess not. I can appreciate a straightforward guy.” She raised her eyebrows up and down.
The amount of flirting between them was making me uncomfortable. “Maybe you should send it to Abby, too,” I suggested. “She might want to apply.”
“That’s really not necessary,” Abby countered.
“Oh, but it is,” I insisted.
“Here,” Sam said, grabbing Garland’s phone again. She typed quickly. “That’s Abby’s phone number.” Once she handed it back, she slapped her forehead. “I’m such a dummy. I’ll just forward the text. Then you don’t have to retype it.” Seconds later, Abby’s phone buzzed. She looked at the message and responded the same way Sam had. That set Sam off again. Now the giggles were in stereo.
“Is someone going to read me the dumb text?” I asked.
“It’s not dumb,” Garland chided. “It’s…it’s…” He grappled for the right word.
“Efficient.” Abby filled in the blank.
He nodded gratefully. “Exactly. It’s efficient.”
She grinned as she looked back at her phone, cleared her throat, and started reading. “Thank you for your interest in being Garland’s female companion. Your application will be processed by our highly qualified recruiting team. Those candidates chosen to move forward will be notified within twenty-four hours. Please answer the following eligibility question. What kind of companionship are you looking for: friendship, romantic, other?”
I shook my head. “Dude, you’re such a dork.” Garland was a giant doofus, but secretly I envied that he could make people laugh like that. It was truly a gift. Somewhere out there was a girl who had funny at the top of her boyfriend prerequisite list. I just had to find that girl. And I was starting my search with Abby.
For the next twenty minutes, Garland shot the breeze with the girls. I was quiet, mostly observing how Abby and Garland interacted. They had a lot of similar personality traits. Surprisingly, as far as interests went, Abby had more in common with me than with Garland. But Garland and I got along so well, there should be no reason that he and Abby wouldn’t hit it off.
Sam pushed her chair back and stood, grabbing her tray and loading it with all the empty dishes. Abby and Garland were in a heated debate about which sketch comedy group was funnier. Garland was a huge SNL fan, but Abby was singing the praises of some show called Studio C. I’d never heard of it, but she was so convincing that I was curious to look it up.
“Let me help you with that,” I offered. I took half the dishes from Sam’s tray. Now was the perfect time to fill her in on my plan.
“Thanks.” She smiled. As we stepped away from the table, she nodded toward Abby and added under her breath, “I’ve learned it’s futile to argue with her. She’s generally shy around new people, but that’s only until she gets to know them. Once she’s comfortable… Let’s just say it’s best not to get her worked up.”
I laughed. “I can see that.” We reached the trash can and dumped the trays. I glanced back. Garland was waving his hands in big, animated gestures. Abby was fighting a smile and fervently shaking her head. “They seem to be getting along.”
Her face contorted. “I know, right? That doesn’t happen very often. She usually clams up around cute boys.” She smirked at me. “Or says something stupid.”
Sam was obviously implying that she thought I was cute, and I didn’t discourage the flirting because it was better for my plan if she flirted with me instead of Garland. “Stupid? You mean like making fun of her own boobs?”
“Exactly.” Sam’s eyes twinkled. “Honestly, I’m surprised she even talked to you today.”
“I didn’t really give her a choice. I pretty much teased her from the very beginning, so she had to interact with me.”
“No, she didn’t. She could have hidden behind one of her books. That’s what she does when she’s uncomfortable, pulls out a book and politely ignores people. Somehow you managed to make her relax, despite your taunting.”
“Yeah, I have that effect on people,” I said, going for blasé.
“I’m sure you do,” Sam purred.
I’d never been just friends with a girl. Never really had the desire to. But for some unexplainable reason, I felt a pull toward Abby. It was totally platonic, of course. Perhaps this was how people felt about their little sisters. Except I had a hard time believing I’d find my own sister attractive. Whatever the connection, it only increased my motivation to make something happen between her and my dating-impaired roommate.
I jerked my chin toward Garland and Abby. “I’m going to hook them up. I think they’d be perfect together.”
Sam smiled, her subtle attempt to seduce me momentarily forgotten. “I was totally thinking the same thing! All through dinner.”
“Does that mean you’ll help me?”
Her face grew excited. “Absolutely. Whatever you need, I’m your girl.”
I was relieved to know I had backup. This matchmaking stuff was uncharted territory for me. Sam seemed like the type of girl who’d probably done it a time or two. “Thanks. I don’t have a solid plan yet, but when I do, you’ll be the first to know.”
I didn’t see Abby again for another three days. I had no idea where she lived or what her schedule was like, so I couldn’t orchestrate an accidental meeting. I kept hoping we’d cross paths, but the campus is big and it never happened. Eventually, I stole her number out of Garland’s phone and called her to ask when the next student government meeting was—even though I knew the answer.
We chatted long enough for me to be nosy. I discovered that she lived in Camden Hall, which was the closest girls’ dorm to ours. Garland and I walked past it every morning on our way to the cafeteria. I also learned that she had Econ 101 right after me in the same lecture hall. So, if I was willing to be late to math, I could catch her in passing then, too. The most helpful info was that her classes finished at two o’clock every day and she usually went straight home.
“You want to go to the dining hall and get a snack?” I asked Garland. I’d been attempting to do homework, but my mind was preoccupied. It was 2:07. Abby should be on her way home by now.
He didn’t look up from his computer. “We ate lunch less than two hours ago. How are you hungry again?”
I thought for sure that’d work. He was always eating. “I guess I’m not really that hungry. I’m more bored than anything.” I lay back on my bed, using a tennis ball for a friendly game of catch between myself and the wall. “You want to go for a walk?”
This time he did look up, arching one eyebrow. “A walk?”
“Yeah, a walk.” I rolled my eyes. When he said it that way, it sounded like I’d asked him to join me for a romantic moonlit stroll on the beach. “It’s called exercise. It’s supposed to be good for you.”
“So is studying. Maybe you should try it.”
“I was studying, but I can’t focus right now.”
Garland ignored me and kept typing. I caught the ball, then rolled over on my side and watched him for a full minute. He started squirming. “Stop staring at me. It’s distracting. And creepy.”
“I’ll stop if you come with me. We’ll make a loop around Camden Hall and come straight back. Fifteen minutes, tops.”
“That sounds very specific.” He narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “What’s your agenda?”
“No agenda.” I shrugged, playing innocent. “Other than wanting some fresh air.”
“Open the window,” he suggested.
“It’s not the same.” Why was he being so difficult?
“Then pace the hall or something.” He was kind of grumbling now.
“Pretty please?” I begged and stuck my lips out in a deep, guilt-inducing pout. Nobody was immune to my pouty face. Not even Garland. It was wrong to manipulate him, but it was for a good cause. He shook his head. “Dude, it’s too cold outside.”
I glanced at my alarm clo
ck. If we didn’t leave soon, we’d miss Abby. I knew I could push Garland pretty far, but everyone had a breaking point. I didn’t know where his was, and I didn’t really want to find out. I clasped my hands in a pleading manner. “I need you to come.”
“Why?” The low rumble in his throat indicated that he was getting irritated—for real.
Stupid, stubborn roommate. He constantly picked playing over school. What was the difference today? It’s like he knew what I was trying to do. I had one, maybe two arguments left before I’d have to drop it. As badly as I wanted the rendezvous with Abby, it wasn’t worth getting the cold shoulder all weekend.
“I need you for protection,” I replied with a serious expression. It was ridiculous, but it was the first thing that popped into my head. I hoped the lunacy of my comment would break the tension.
“Protection?” He snorted. “Protection from what? The hordes of girls waiting outside?”
This was getting me nowhere. I just had to force his hand. “Exactly!” I hopped off the bed, reaching over to snap his computer shut. He tried to slap my hand away, but I was too fast.
“You’re acting weird.”
“No, I’m being totally normal. You’re the one acting weird, suddenly all super-student and whatnot. Since when do you care about studying?”
“Since I’m getting a B minus in calc and I have a test tomorrow.”
“I’ll help you study as soon as we get back.” I was getting an A in calculus.
Garland wrinkled his nose and sighed. “Fine. Fifteen minutes. That’s it.” I tossed his jacket to him before slipping mine on along with a homemade beanie I’d confiscated. He got it from Chrissy for Christmas. I figured she’d made it. By the time I discovered it was actually Nate who crocheted it, I was too attached to give it up. It was warm and fuzzy. Plus, it looked good on me.
Garland was right. After two minutes outside, I was freezing my butt off. We were walking at a brisk pace to keep warm, but once Camden Hall came into view, I slowed way down. I didn’t see Abby and needed to stall. “Soooo…. How’s life?”
Garland laughed. “You sleep ten feet away from me. You know as well as I do how my life is going.”
The Problem With Cupid (Holiday Romance Book 2) Page 2