by Ella M. Lee
“This afternoon, I’m picking up wisteria trees,” I said to the empty room. “Baby ones. I’m going to plant a grove of them. Wisteria can live for hundreds of years, and the climate in Japan is perfect for it. It blossoms purple, like our clan’s magic, and it symbolizes immortality.”
I sighed, stroking the wooden floor, letting my magic shift and play around me.
“I’m busy. So busy. And so tired. You wouldn’t even believe. I could use an extra set of hands to help with everything. Or, like, ten extra sets of hands. There’s so much to do, and I’m worried we won’t be fast enough.
“I know, I know, you would tell me that’s stupid. You would roll your eyes. You’ve got this, you would say. Yeah, yeah. But not everyone is an impressive genius like you. No one is like you. I have a feeling I could live a thousand years and still never find someone who can read my mind like you could. Not even Nicolas.”
I laughed weakly. The sound died, fading into the wood and the wards that dampened everything in this room.
“This is the beginning, and I’m scared, but I’m also amazed. Lightning is cool. It’s so cool. It’s perfect. It’s doing everything we want. We suck at all of it right now, of course, but it’s there, with all the things we asked for and all the things we need.”
I closed my eyes, swallowing hard, stifling the tears that were beginning to burn behind my eyes.
“You did that. Thanks. There isn’t anything else important to say. So… I love you, and thanks.”
I took a deep breath and stood. Magic pulsed around me, eager and excited. Daniel had asked me to move on, and I would work on that. It would be difficult. It would be frightening. It would be harder than any of the other million times I had started over in my life.
But it would happen.
There existed a distant day when Lightning Clan was safe and established. When we had hundreds of members. When we had some of the most powerful magic in the world. Of course we would, because it was Daniel’s magic, and there was no one stronger. We’d get there, no doubt.
I brushed the edge of the frame that held Dan’s picture and squeezed my eyes shut for a moment. My next words came out as a harsh whisper, having sprung to mind from the depths of a memory. Dan had read this Robert Frost poem to me one a rainy afternoon as we lounged on his couch together.
“The woods are lovely, dark and deep, but I have promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep…”
I paused, swallowing, trying to get the last line of the poem out as though it were part of a spell that would fix all my problems.
“And miles to go before I sleep.”
Once I was past all the hard work and trying times, there existed a future where I was happy. I smiled at the thought, even though it felt impossible right now. I would be happy and fulfilled and at peace. I would be powerful and strong and confident. Daniel and Nicolas had said it a million times; it had to be true.
But for now?
For now, I could only pick myself up, dust off the ashes of my old life, and step out into the light of a new day.
Acknowledgments
I cried a lot while writing Ashes. I think you can imagine why. It was the book that took the longest to write, and it was also the book that was the most difficult on me emotionally. In a way, these three books are simply a long tribute to Daniel, the boy with the very dark eyes. Fiona loved him, I loved him, and I hope you loved him too.
I have many people to thank for helping me through the journey of publishing these books. Although I’ve lived on the outskirts of the writing and publishing industry for ages, this was my first time experiencing it firsthand, and I think I got very lucky with my support system.
As usual, there is my husband, William Lee. He is constantly there for me, no matter what. He also watches me cry on the couch while writing and leaves me alone, because he doesn’t want to interrupt my flow. “Daniel?” he once asked as I sniffled into a tissue, and I could only nod. He doesn’t really read fantasy novels, but he reads my novels. Can you really get sweeter than that?
I have several amazing people who provide feedback throughout my writing process. Samantha Linzi reads my first drafts and drinks bubble tea with me while talking me out of bad ideas (there were plenty for this series, trust me). For Ashes, Courtney Kelly read my middle draft and provided great developmental feedback and critique. She worked incredibly hard on this installment, and I don’t think it would be possible to find someone else as dedicated to Nicolas and Fiona as she is. She is magnifique, as Nicolas might say. Bailey Taylor beta read my later draft and caught all my last-minute issues so I could make the story as perfect as possible.
Crystal Watanabe provided line editing services for Ashes. I could not have found a better line editor, nor anyone else who would put up with the sheer number of em dashes I force on her. For proofreading, I engaged the services of iWordyNerdy to ensure none of my clumsy mistakes made it to publication.
This novel prominently features a temple on the outskirts of Osaka. Joushin-ji is not a real place, but it is inspired by every temple I’ve ever visited in Japan, and it is inspired by the somewhat-wild landscape just south of Osaka. If you want to understand the type of place that is Lightning’s new clan house, visit the tiny town of Koyasan and stay overnight at one of the temples there. You will experience the tatami rooms, the gardens, the creaky wooden walkways, and the elaborate inner sanctums of a Buddhist temple for yourself.
This novel was more difficult to write than the other two, with the final quarter or so being written in the middle of February 2020 and edited during the COVID-19 crisis. I am not the type to enjoy being trapped inside, but I was at least glad I could spend that time with Fiona and the others.
I hope you enjoyed the conclusion to this arc. I can assure you that there will be more stories of Lightning Clan. As you can imagine, they have a lot of new problems to face. But for now, they are resting and recovering… which is what I think I’ll do for a little while.
All my love.
About the Author
Ella M. Lee is a graduate of Bennington College who spent years in the tech industry before getting back to her story-crafting roots. In her spare time, she likes to travel, cook, drink tea, and spend Saturday mornings repeating moves, spins, and jumps over and over again for her figure skating coach. She has a loving husband and two semi-loving cats who share her home near Boston, MA. For more information about Ella and the Fire Within series, please visit www.ellamlee.com!