by J. L. Drake
“Piero! Francesco!” I screamed, begging anyone to hear my cries for help.
“Shut up! Help me get her in.” Another pair of arms helped shove me inside the car, and from behind my wild hair I caught sight of the rosary beads and went ice cold.
Abramo glared at me as he slammed the door and hopped in the front seat.
“What? What’s going on?” I cried as Mariano ripped my purse away from me.
“I told you, you were my little ace.” He snickered with enjoyment.
Fire lined my veins and my temper rose quickly as I twisted and drove my heel into his mouth, hearing a crack. I repeated the action, driving my boot into the top of his shoulder. He grabbed my legs and yanked me to the floor of the car, clawing at my skin in fury, trying to inflict pain wherever he could. I was too amped up on adrenaline to feel much and fought back with everything I had.
“Enough!” Nonna ordered.
Mariano let me go and pressed a hand to his face, furiously cursing, but stopped suddenly when Nonna cleared her throat. Jesus, she really did have power over these people. His watery gaze swung over to mine and glared. He spat out a tooth into his hand and studied it as blood trickled out of his mouth. If I wasn’t as scared as I was, I would have grinned at my handiwork, but instead my muscles locked in place with terror as I wondered what was in store for me.
“She’s all yours,” he hissed through his new gap, then chucked his bloody tooth into the car. Suddenly, Piero’s words about the family business came rushing back to me. “Proof of a hit is everything. Without proof, it’s just one man’s word against another.”
“Thank you, Mariano.” Nonna carefully dropped a baggie of drugs into his bloody hand, and my mouth dropped open. She moved her gaze down to me as she pulled out a gun.
“If you try to escape, I won’t think twice about pulling the trigger. Now, sit up in the seat.”
Cringing, I tucked Mariano’s tooth into my pocket as I moved to sit back on the seat.
“Do you know the things that man’s been up to?” I squinted at her. I needed to know if she had any inkling of what the rest of the family knew about that snake of a man. I couldn’t imagine she’d let someone like him walk freely through the family.
“I know enough.” Her wording made me wonder. I shook in my seat as the car peeled off down the hill. Several possible scenarios of what was going on passed through me, but none had a happy ending. “Men with habits are easier to control.” She tugged at her blazer. “Mariano is nothing more than a stupid boy with a big ego.”
“Ego?” I echoed, thinking just how far off the mark she was.
My phone vibrated in my pocket, and I tried not to react.
Carefully, I acted like my ankle hurt and leaned forward to rub it while I swiped the screen to answer it with the other hand. I had no idea who it was, but anyone was better than no one.
“Now,” she moved to get more comfortable, “here’s how this will go. I will drop you off, well away from town, and you will take this bus ticket and leave and never return.” She tossed it next to me. “If you do, I will kill you. If you contact Elio, Vinni, or Niccola, I will kill you. If you even so much as look in our direction again, I will kill you.”
“Can you just tell me why?” I begged, desperately trying to understand what she thought I’d done.
“I could,” she started to run her white rosary beads through her fingers, “but if you really don’t know, then I’m thinking it might just be best for us all if you stayed ignorant.”
I closed my eyes and let some frustrated tears fall. I pretended to slump in defeat and glanced down at the phone and saw it was still connected. Whoever it was hadn’t hung up.
Think.
“Why are we passing the old mill?” I blurted, and she stared at me. “Are we heading away from the ocean?”
“Be quiet.” She rubbed her head.
“Please just tell me where we are going.” I started to freak out. I had never been in this direction before, and I hoped the person on the phone would hear where we were.
“Shhh.”
When the car started to slow about an hour later, I felt numb and defeated. I couldn’t risk her seeing the phone and prayed whoever had been on the line was still there.
The car pulled over, and I saw a small sign. “What’s the Greenery Gates?”
“Get out.”
“No.” I shook my head and gripped the seat.
She tapped on the window, and Abramo opened the door and pulled me out, tossing me on the ground. I hit hard, and when I tried to get up, he pulled his gun and fired a shot at the ground next to me. I froze in terror, waiting for the next one to end me.
“You should have listened.” He shrugged then got back in the car. I watched as they sped away, leaving me in the middle of nowhere.
I stood on shaky legs and pulled my phone from my pocket. The screen was shattered. I tried to use it, but it was broken.
The hot sun beat down on me, so I found a tree and sat against its trunk, trying to process what the hell had just happened. I pulled myself together with a reminder that I had survived a bombing, I had killed a man, and I had Elio, and I knew he would find me. He always found me.
I lowered my head to my knees, closed my eyes, and tried to hatch a plan. Tears fell, but I stayed strong and worked out some possible solutions, but all required me to walk too far in the heat. Thankfully, I still had my boots on, and the sun was starting to set. At least I could walk in the dark and it would be cooler.
I must have been exhausted, because I woke up at the sound of tires on dirt. I jolted awake.
“Sienna?” I blinked to see Ugo racing toward me in the headlights. The sun was just going down. “Are you okay?”
“Yes.” I nodded as I jumped up. I’d never been happier to see him than I was right then.
“Is she okay?” Elenora came racing up behind him, swallowing me up in her arms. “Oh, my god, Sienna, did they hurt you?”
“I’m fine.” I let a wave of relief wash over me, pushing the pain from my cheek away. “How did you find me?”
“I tracked your phone when I heard your conversation in the car.” Ugo gave my arm a warm pat. “I lost track of you at one point, but we weren’t too far behind. I’m just glad we got to you before it was too dark.”
“Can you drive me to the bus station? I want to go back to my apartment.” I’d had enough of all of this for one lifetime. Elio could come there to find me, and we could work stuff out from the safely of my own place.
“You can’t.” Elenora sighed. “If you do, they’ll find you.”
“Save it.” I held up a hand. “I don’t want to hear that anymore. I’m not safe anywhere, so I’ll take my chances.”
“No.” She took my hand and placed something in it. “You don’t understand. This goes deeper than you think.”
I eyed the red velvet bag and knew another secret lay inside. Slowly, I released the strings and opened the bag, and a wave of nausea and confusion washed over me. The headlights caught its grooves, and I felt my entire world tilt.
“Sienna, I couldn’t share this until now…”
“No.” I held it up between my fingertips as the soft fabric dropped to the ground. I wanted nothing to do with it. I knew exactly what it was. “Take it back.”
“Sweetheart,” she leaned forward and held my face in her hands, “it’s yours. You had the truth all along, but you just didn’t realize what it meant.”
“How would I?” I muttered.
I glanced at Ugo, who looked upset for me, and then over at Oscar, who looked away, obviously uncomfortable.
I pushed her away and ran into the field, feeling like I was about to explode. When I couldn’t handle it anymore, I grabbed my head, leaned back, and let out an Earth-shattering cry.
“Hey,” Ugo came closer with his hands in his pockets, “I’m sorry it was presented to you this way, but you have to know it’s not something easy to just bring up.”
I held up a h
and for him to stop. I couldn’t handle any more tonight.
“Will you take me back to Elio’s?”
“Sure.” He nodded for me to follow him back to the car.
My mama watched me from the corner of her eye, no doubt wondering how lost I felt right now. I thought I had felt the lowest of lows, but I was wrong once again. It was a sick joke that life was playing with me. It fed off my pain and heartache and tested my will to keep going. The only thing that kept me from running into the woods and never looking back was the tiny hope that perhaps now Elio and I could be okay. Yes, there would be a ton to work out, but we could do it because at the end of the day we loved one another. Surely that would be enough. It had to be.
“I would like you to come back to the hotel.” Mama placed her soft hand over my tight fist as we approached the turnoff to the Capris’ estate, “I would feel a little better if you were with me rather than with them.” Her tone was back to its old way, dripping hate for the Capris. I wanted to snap at her gall for being so insensitive at a time like this. Besides, The Finder had already planted doubt about her within me, and also about one of the Santoro bothers. I covered my face to stop from screaming and wondering which way was up and which way was down. I cleared my head and listened to my heart, listening to where it wanted to be.
“I want to be with Elio tonight.”
“Sienna, I really think you should—”
“Ugo, pull over,” I hissed, cutting her off, and Ugo immediately stopped the car. I opened my door then turned to her. “I’m tired of people telling me what I should do. Thank you for finding me tonight, but if it’s all the same to you, I want to forget about the rest.” I slammed the door and headed toward the gates that were just around the bend.
“Sienna!” Ugo got out of the car and chased after me.
“Please, Ugo, I just need some—”
“No, I understand. I just…” He paused as he stopped in front of me. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry for all of this. It’s all very confusing and messy.”
“Understatement of the year.”
“Look, I can’t even begin to understand all that you’re going through, but—”
“No, you can’t.” I cut him off, both mentally and physically exhausted.
“I know, but I don’t have much family, and neither do you, so just call me if you need something, okay?” I could see the sincerity in his face.
“Okay, thanks.” I nodded and turned my tired body away from them. I was thankful he didn’t follow or let my mama come after me. Every step was hard, but my determination to get to Elio drove me forward.
“Good evening, Miss Giovanna.” One of the guards eyed me. I was sure he wondered just where the hell I’d appeared from. “Shall I call you a ride?”
“No, thanks. I need the time to think.”
“Very well.” He hesitated but opened the gates to let me pass.
My pace was slow, and my legs were as heavy as my heart. I felt broken and dull and wasn’t sure how I was going to share my news with Elio. I certainly would never keep anything like this from him, but I needed to know he would listen and not flip out. We just needed to lock ourselves in a room and air everything out.
The moon was full and provided soft light for my walk up the hill. Its light also allowed me to see the string of cars that lined the road up to his parents’ house. As I passed by them, I wondered what it was about. I hoped it wasn’t something I’d have to attend. I certainly wasn’t in any mood to socialize and hoped I could sneak quietly up to my bedroom. I opened the door and heard voices.
“And where are Anna and the notebook now?” Andrea asked quietly.
“No clue.” Elio’s strained voice had me slowly walking into the living room to find Vinni, Niccola, Donatello, and Elio, who looked as if they had been to battle. Andrea and Piero looked worried, and Francesco was in the corner with his head down. Slowly, I drew my hand back behind me, feeling like they could see through me.
“What happened?” I whispered, trying to absorb the scene that lay in front of me.
“Sienna,” Andrea carefully stepped away from her son toward me, “where have you been?”
“I…” I paused, remembering they didn’t know about psycho Nonna. “I was out.”
She took a deep breath and placed a hand on her chest like my words hurt her.
“Show me what’s in your hand.”
I squeezed my fist around the piece of steel and started to panic.
“Sienna, sweetheart, please show me what’s in your hand.”
I broke out in a sweat and wanted to cry all over again. This wasn’t how this was supposed to go.
“Sienna,” Piero said softly from behind her, “please do as she says.”
As I slowly lifted my hand, my chin quivered, and my heartbeat pounded against my breastbone. One by one, my fingers uncurled until it rested in the center of my palm.
Andera covered her mouth as she inspected the engravings on the inside.
“Oh,” she cried and turned her back to me. I glanced at Elio, my lifeline, who looked pale and ever so slowly turned his gaze away from me and turned to sink into a chair with his back to me, leaving me raw and exposed in front of his family.
“Elio?” The words had barely escaped my lips when I spotted her. Her evil eyes darkened, and a single brow rose as her hand landed on Elio’s shoulder.
“Proof is proof,” Nonna said in a strong, confident voice, reminding me this was her family and she held all the power.
My fingers almost burned as they squeezed around the hated metal, and I raced up to the guest room and slammed the door, locking it behind me. I sank to the floor like stone.
I thought this was what I wanted, to know my family, to learn about my past, but nothing could have prepared me for this.
Nothing.
I pushed my hand into my pocket and felt the crinkle of paper. It reminded me I still had one move left. I pulled out the bus ticket Nonna had tossed at me and eyed the final destination.
Rome.
At five a.m. I jolted awake. I could hear voices from down below. With a great effort, I moved across the room and stepped out onto the balcony.
“I want an army of soldiers protecting this property by daylight.” Nonna’s commanding voice came to me as she ordered Abramo. He held her car door open as she continued to speak. “I want to know Elio’s every move. I can’t have him slipping back to that woman!”
I pulled myself back against the doorframe and folded my arms tight to hold myself together as I watched her get inside the car. The engine roared to life a moment later, and they were gone. I knew that was my cue to leave. Just as I was about to step back inside, I caught sight of Elio’s shoulder as he stood under the balcony.
“Son, you can’t leave,” Andrea pleaded with him. “We need to figure this out.”
“Mama, I need you—” He stopped abruptly and cleared his throat as a warning that someone had come up on them. “Mama, give me until mid-morning, and we can discuss things then, all right?”
“What about—”
“Don’t,” he warned and stepped away. Then he, Niccola, Vinni, and Francesco headed to the town car and flew out of the driveway and down the hill.
With a deep breath, I made my way over to the desk, found some paper, and started to write.
Dearest Elio and Capris,
As a little girl, I dreamt of having a place I could call home, a room that was just for me, and parents who would tuck me in, kiss me goodnight, and chase the monsters away.
Then one day I met you by the pond. You earned my trust and slowly became my friend. You taught me what it meant to share life experiences, and I eagerly awaited each note you would leave for me tucked in the trunk of a tree. As the years went on, I fell totally in love with you and let my guard down enough to finally meet your family.
I never thought I would ever be so accepted by anyone, let alone complete strangers, and to feel their warmth and love was overpowering. I’ll a
dmit I was nervous at first. Who could blame me? It was my first interaction with people who were so obviously happy and wanted to share it with me. You brought me that.
Then just as I became comfortable and felt a sense of belonging, my entire world disappeared. Nothing was left of you but a picture and a broken heart.
The only way I could cope with my loss was to put you in a box and seal it up tight in the fear that, over the years, if I slipped in a moment of weakness and thought of you, I wouldn’t be damaged.
Moving on was the hardest thing I’d ever done.
Then life brought you back into my world.
I was tested, and I failed.
You chewed me up, swallowed me down, and spat me back out.
I thought I was doing everything right.
I thought my loyalty was enough.
I thought I was enough.
I never asked for this. I am not this.
But I know as I’m sitting here writing these words that this is it for us.
This is where we are supposed to say goodbye.
I can’t—won’t go through that again.
Instead, I will go.
Thank you for my memories. They will always remind me of what family should mean.
I’ll be all right and will do what I do best—survive.
Because I’ve put you back in the box.
Because some dreams are just not meant to be.
Once yours,
Sienna Giovanna
Formally known as
Alessia Coppola
Once I was done, I packed what belongings I had left at the Hill House and placed the envelope on the kitchen island and reached for the jar on the counter. I dumped out some flour on the counter and drew my finger through the fine powder.
I grabbed the handle of my suitcase and brushed a tear away as I headed outside.
“Ready?” Ugo opened the door to the town car.
“Yes.” I lowered my head and took one last glance at the Hill House, and the oh-so-familiar feeling of being let go drained from my body.