by Heidi Swain
‘Sorry about earlier,’ he said in a low tone as he dropped back and fell into step with me.
‘Don’t worry about it,’ I shrugged, even though I was having to bite my tongue to stop from asking what he had been getting at.
During the afternoon, as I mulled Gabe’s cutting comment over, I had started to entertain the idea that he had somehow spotted Gavin dropping me off and jumped to the wrong conclusion, but I knew he hadn’t. Gatekeeper’s Cottage had been in complete darkness. I had made a point of looking to check.
‘I only meant that, given what Jamie said, that sounded very much like something the old Hayley would have got up to and, as you know, I’ve always been rather keen on the new Hayley, even if you haven’t.’
‘Oh,’ I swallowed. ‘Right.’
I wasn’t sure if that was what he had actually meant, but his explanation was far more palatable than what I had assumed, so I decided to accept it.
‘Although,’ I added, ‘to be fair, even though it was the old Hayley who kissed Jamie, she did have the best of intentions for doing it.’
‘Oh?’ He smiled. ‘She wasn’t making a play for the youngest Connelly son, then.’
‘Absolutely not,’ I gasped, pretending to be hurt that he would even suggest such a thing. ‘It was actually a brazen wake-up call for Anna, to make her realise that she had fallen for him.’
‘And did it work?’
I pointed ahead, to the spot where Anna and Jamie had stopped walking and were wrapped in each other’s arms.
‘Like a charm,’ I grinned.
When I looked back at Gabe, he had stopped walking too and was holding a small sprig of mistletoe over my head.
‘I’m not sure that’s a good idea,’ I swallowed, my voice thick in my throat.
The last thing I wanted was for Anna to turn around and catch sight of us in a clinch, no matter how brief or chaste.
‘Me neither,’ he said, tossing it aside and pulling me into his arms. ‘Who needs it?’
It was another swoon-worthy kiss, which soon made me forget that Anna was even anywhere in the vicinity. Gabe’s full lips pressed firmly against mine sent heat coursing through my body, reaching even as far as my chilled fingertips and toes.
‘Gabe,’ I eventually gasped, as I began to register the dull ache in the back of my neck that signified I had been kissing someone significantly taller than me for quite an extraordinary length of time. ‘Gabe.’
‘No,’ he said, refusing to break away. ‘I don’t want to stop.’
I put aside all thoughts of how he wasn’t looking for either a brief encounter or something serious, or indeed anything that had the remotest chance of making him happy, along with memories of his recent house guest, and instead focused on giving the kiss my full and undivided attention.
It was a passionate effort on both sides and I couldn’t help hoping that it meant he had finally unpacked and sorted through the baggage that was pulling him back every time we got close. If this was the all-clear I had been secretly hoping for, then I was ready to run with it.
‘You can stop now!’ called a voice somewhere ahead of us. ‘You’ve made your point.’
Anna’s laughter cut through the unexpected but most marvellous moment.
‘Good god, Hayley,’ laughed Jamie as he and Anna walked back to where Gabe and I were about to fall to the floor and get even better acquainted. ‘You’re insatiable, do you know that? Next year I’m not allowing you within a fifty-metre radius of anything that even resembles mistletoe. But at least you got something positive out of losing!’
‘What are you talking about?’ said Gabe, as he finally came to his senses.
I looked at Anna and shook my head. Disaster was heading in my direction and I had no idea how to avert it.
‘Anna just told me,’ said Jamie, looking from one of us to the other.
Anna looked panic stricken but, like me, was unable to shut Jamie up.
‘Told you what?’ asked Gabe, bending to pick up his long-reach pruner.
‘Nothing,’ Anna blurted out, ‘I didn’t tell you anything, Jamie.’
‘Yes, you did,’ Jamie teased, thinking it was some game and that he was having the last laugh by dropping his beloved, and me, very firmly in it. ‘It’s too late to deny it now. She told me that she had a bet with Hayley here, and as the loser, she had to kiss you under the mistletoe by the end of today.’
‘Is that right?’ said Gabe, nodding his head and forcing himself to sound as unaffected as possible. ‘Well, there you go.’
‘No,’ I began to say, but he didn’t give me the chance to remind him that he was the one who had instigated the kiss, and that I had had very little say in the matter.
‘Well, I’m sorry to say you haven’t won on this occasion, Anna,’ he rallied with as much dignity as he could muster, ‘because, as you can see, there’s not so much as a single berry of mistletoe in sight.’
‘Gabe,’ I swallowed.
Anna didn’t say anything, but she looked thoroughly ashamed and very aware of what her blabbing had done.
‘So, I guess you do win this one, Hayley,’ Gabe shrugged, striding off in the opposite direction from the hall before I had the opportunity to make him see sense.
Chapter 25
On Saturday morning we woke early to discover that it had been steadily snowing for a few hours. As a result, we knew that the festive feeling in town would be cranked up a notch and the tree auction and bake sale were bound to be a roaring success. The gardens looked beautiful as I opened my bedroom curtains and when I pushed open the window for a second or two, I discovered it was eerily quiet. Not even my bolshie robin was in the mood for making his presence felt on this particularly chilly morning.
I hadn’t put my name down as a volunteer for the auction or the sale, but I was heading to Wynbridge nonetheless as I had folk to see and a rather large hamper from Dorothy to drop off at the town hall.
‘Don’t leave the basket with Jemma in the hall,’ Dorothy told me for what must have been the hundredth time, ‘because it will get muddled with all the others.’
‘Empty on arrival into a cardboard box,’ I cut in, paraphrasing the speech I now knew by heart, ‘and then put the basket straight back in the Land Rover.’
‘Thank you, Miss Clever-Clogs,’ Dorothy tutted. ‘And tell Jemma—’
‘That you’ll be there as soon as Anna’s ready to drive you in.’
She nodded curtly and I went to find Mick who would be driving me in and helping with the auction. Gabe had set off far earlier to deliver the greenery in the trailer that was hooked up to his truck rather than the Land Rover, and I wondered if Mick was feeling a little redundant.
‘You must be joking,’ he laughed, when I asked him. ‘Having Gabe here feels like Christmas has come early for me.’
I felt exactly the same way, but for very different reasons.
‘Although,’ he frowned, looking concerned, ‘I can’t help wondering if the lad has taken all this on and is working so hard because he’s running away from something.’
I had discovered enough about Mick to understand that he had endured tough times after leaving the armed forces, so he knew what he was talking about when it came to picking up on problems. He didn’t necessarily say much, but he was the kind of man who took things in, and given what Gabe had told me about trying to practise what he preached when it came to his own baggage, I thought that perhaps Mick was right.
‘Well, he’s in the best place if he needs a shoulder or three to cry on, isn’t he?’ I smiled.
‘That he is,’ said Mick, ‘but Christmas can be a tough time of year, even when you are living at Wynthorpe Hall.’
‘What makes you think his troubles, if he has any, are wrapped up with Christmas? You don’t think we’ve got another Anna on our hands, do you?’
Anna had arrived at the hall with an extreme aversion to December and all its trimmings having lost her mum to cancer on Christmas Day when she was a little
girl. Thankfully, meeting the Connelly clan and falling in love with Jamie had gone some way to helping recover her seasonal spirit.
Mick shrugged.
‘I don’t know about that,’ he told me, ‘but I get the impression that there’s something about this time of year that Gabe doesn’t like.’
As predicted, Wynbridge was awash with folk all keen to embrace the Christmas cheer and many were talking about the Winter Wonderland, which was now, unbelievably, just one week away. Having emptied Dorothy’s beloved basket and stowed it away as instructed, I stood and surreptitiously watched Gabe getting stuck into sectioning off the wonderful array of trees that would soon be going on sale. To my eyes he looked as if he had a healthy handle on Christmas, but Mick had given me food for thought nonetheless.
Gabe didn’t so much as glance in my direction and I felt grateful that there was a full-on, manic week of preparation ahead because it would stop me worrying too much about what had happened, wondering how I could put it right.
‘Hello, Hayley,’ smiled Francesca as I made my way back through the crowds to her art store again. ‘This is a lovely surprise.’
‘Morning, Fran,’ I smiled back.
She had insisted I call her that when I spent my advent voucher, and had also told me that her grandfather had sung my praises when she’d mentioned I’d been in.
‘What can I do for you today?’ she asked.
‘I need a frame,’ I told her, ‘something plain for this.’
I reached into my bag and pulled out a small bubble-wrapped picture which I had already mounted.
‘My goodness, did you do this?’ Fran asked, wide eyed. ‘It’s very good.’
‘Yes,’ I swallowed, looking at the simple painting I had created from a sketch I had taken of Mum in a rare quiet moment as she was reading a magazine at the kitchen table at home, ‘but it’s years old.’
‘It’s beautiful,’ said Fran, taking in every detail.
‘Thank you,’ I blushed. Acknowledging my artistic efforts without turning as red as Santa’s suit was going to take some getting used to. ‘Thank you very much.’
‘And I have just the frame to suit it,’ added Fran, not noticing my colour.
Together we slotted the painting into place and then she kindly wrapped it, ready for me to pass on.
‘So, how’s it looking out there?’ she asked with a nod to the market square.
‘Busy,’ I told her. ‘Which is why I’m having an early lunch in the pub.’
‘I don’t blame you,’ she laughed, ‘it’ll be standing room only in there soon. I’m staying open all day to make sure I catch any passing trade, but I’ve no chance of being as busy as the bar.’
‘Well, you never know,’ I told her as I buttoned up my coat. ‘Folk are filling their bags and getting into the festive spirit, so I can’t imagine you’re in for a quiet day. I’ll see you soon.’
‘Next weekend,’ she reminded me. ‘We’re coming to the Winter Wonderland.’
‘In that case, wrap up warm,’ I advised her, ‘and set aside the whole day because there’s going to be loads to see and do.’
The pub was already getting busy by the time I had made a quick lap of the market, including another stop at the Cherry Tree Makes and Bakes stall, but I managed to grab a table after ordering Skylark ham, eggs and chips and a coffee at the bar. It was far too early in the day to be drinking alcohol, and I needed to thaw out.
I had just finished my rather large lunch and was getting ready to deliver my artistic parcel when Gavin walked in with a couple of mates. He sent them off to order and then came and plonked himself on the stool opposite me.
‘All right,’ he said, his grin as wide as ever.
I tried to ignore the nudges I could see working their way along the line of lads buying drinks, but Gavin turned and spotted them.
‘I haven’t told a soul about what happened,’ he whispered to me, ‘not a dicky bird to anyone.’
I was rather taken aback that he thought there had been anything to tell. Unless he was referring to the details surrounding my departure from school. I have to admit, I had been feeling rather regretful about disclosing that.
‘Scouts honour,’ he promised when I didn’t say anything.
‘I’m not sure what you’re talking about, Gavin,’ I frowned.
‘In the van on the way home,’ he winked. ‘You know.’
‘I know that absolutely nothing happened on the way home,’ I told him sternly, ‘so don’t even think about suggesting otherwise.’
‘All right,’ he laughed, ‘don’t get your knickers in a knot. I was only going to tease you about having too much to drink, but I’m guessing we’re not quite there yet.’
‘Believe me,’ I said, ‘we will never be there again.’
He couldn’t resist pulling out his cheekiest grin and my heart sank as I spotted Mick and Gabe walk in. There was no way they wouldn’t see us so there was no point trying to pretend I was invisible.
‘Well,’ said Gavin, reaching under the table and giving my knee a playful squeeze, ‘I better get back to the lads.’
‘Off you go then,’ I said, sitting further back in my seat so I was out of reach. ‘And if I hear so much as a whisper that you’ve been telling folk something happened between us, I swear to god I’ll . . . well, I won’t be responsible for my very violent actions.’
‘I didn’t realise that even just the suggestion of sleeping with me again would be that bad,’ he pouted. ‘I know I have a few faults.’
‘You have more than a few,’ I told him with a shudder.
How was it possible that he, along with practically everyone else, had already forgotten that not all that long ago he had been prepared to promise himself to me for life? Come to think of it, how was it possible that I had ever thought that was an appealing proposition? At the time I thought his cheating had put me off relationships for good, but now I wasn’t so sure. The feelings I had for Gabe had made me question a lot of what I thought I knew, and my experiences of being in love was one of them.
‘God knows where you’ve been,’ I spitefully added.
Gavin bit his lip but didn’t argue back. I got the sudden impression that there was plenty more he would have liked to have said, now he realised that I wasn’t interested in indulging in some no-strings fun in the back of his van. I bitterly regretted knocking back those brandies and letting my guard down. He might have got my artistic ball rolling again, but I had ended up paying a high price for it.
‘I’ll see you around, then,’ he said, standing back up and adjusting the waistband on his trousers, ‘and by the way, if you happened to be thinking of popping round to visit your mum this afternoon, I’ve just seen your old man in the bookies. Timing couldn’t be better.’
The house looked just the same as it did on the day I left. It was a shame, really. The little row of nineteen-fifties council houses were far from the prettiest in Wynbridge, but the abandoned furniture, broken down cars and beer cans that graced the gardens of two or three, my parents’ place included, made me feel sorry for those in between struggling to make the best of what they had while living next door to the neighbours from hell.
It didn’t feel right to just walk in, so I knocked on the back door and waited. When there was no reply I tried the handle, but it was locked. I didn’t particularly want to leave the parcel for just anyone to find so I would have to psych myself up all over again and come back another time.
‘Hayley,’ came a voice from above. ‘Is that you?’
‘Yes,’ I said, squinting up and spotting Mum leaning out of the upstairs hall window.
‘Give me a minute.’
‘I don’t want to interrupt you if you’re busy,’ I called up, showing her the bag, ‘I can just leave this on the step.’
Before I had time to put the bag down she had unlocked the door and pulled me in.
‘Are you on your own?’ she asked, looking towards the road.
‘Yes,’ I sai
d, ‘of course. What’s going on?’
‘Nothing,’ she shrugged, looking more furtive than ever.
For a mad moment I wondered if she had another man upstairs. Thinking of my father, I wouldn’t have blamed her.
‘Mum?’
‘Give me a minute,’ she said, rushing back up the stairs. ‘Stick the kettle on, love, and I’ll fill you in on what’s happened.’
I had made the tea and filled a plate with biscuits, from the stash she kept hidden from Dad, before she came back down.
‘Sorry about that,’ she apologised. ‘I had to put the floorboards back.’
‘You had to what?’
‘The floorboards under the rug in the bedroom,’ she elaborated, ‘that’s where I’ve been hiding the money I’ve managed to squirrel away for when I leave your father.’
Her face was aglow and, despite usually being on the skinny side, I thought she looked as if she’d gained a few pounds. We looked at one another and then burst out laughing. I was amazed by her cunning and her determination to see it through.
‘When I didn’t hear from you,’ I told her, ‘I thought you’d changed your mind.’
‘You must be joking,’ she laughed, biting into a biscuit. ‘Even just the thought of it has changed me.’
‘I can see that,’ I agreed, ‘you look amazing. You want to be careful. If he notices—’
Mum let out another laugh, almost choking on her biscuit.
‘Since when has your father noticed anything beyond his betting slips?’
‘And his belly,’ I joined in.
I drank a mouthful of tea and looked at her over the rim of my mug.
‘So, have you found anything yet?’ I asked.
I hated the thought of her wanting to get out but not being able to find somewhere to go. I knew that if I asked them, Catherine and Angus would take her in, in spite of the differences they’d had in the past, but I wasn’t sure that would be a good idea.
‘Yep,’ she grinned. ‘I’ll be off straight after Christmas.’
‘Really?’
‘Really,’ she breathed. ‘I’ve got myself a job like yours that comes with board and lodging.’