by Karen Renee
My stomach hollowed out at Trent’s words and I regretted drinking the orange juice. Having been his wife for over five years, I knew Trent could be lying, so I ignored the part about Beast being a deadbeat. I put on my best brave face, and narrowed my eyes at my husband. “Trent, who I spend my time with at this juncture has no bearing on our irreconcilable difference. Further, I cannot believe you sent your damn campaign manager to spy on me.”
He laughed. “Just bet you can’t, but I’m damn glad I did it. Knew you were cheating. I just had the wrong man in mind.”
I physically bit my tongue to keep from mentioning Agnes or Terri or whoever the hell that Janet chick was. Instead, I said, “He slept on the couch, and let me take the bed.”
Trent whipped out his phone with a photo of me and Beast facing each other in bed. It was a poor shot because it was fuzzy, and the camera had to zoom through a gap in the curtains, but it was a shot of two people with their heads close together and sheets over their bodies.
“Your lies won’t work on me, Jane. You can come back home, and we’ll figure something out while I’m campaigning. If not, rest assured I’m going to bury you.” He glanced at Beast. “Both of you.”
At that, Beast stood up and moved firmly into Trent’s space. I was right there and even I had to strain to hear him.
“It’s one thing to dig into me. And it’s one thing to threaten me, but no man threatens a woman like Janie. Especially not when I’m around, asshole. Now get the fuck out of here before you say something you’ll really fuckin’ regret.”
Trent glared at Beast, and I thought for sure he would say something stupid to him, but he didn’t. He stepped back from Beast, looked at me and pointed at Beast, “Deadbeat. Remember that.”
I watched Trent leave and I was amazed the other patrons weren’t aware of the verbal skirmish that just happened. I saw my car keys sitting on the table, and I quietly put them in my lap. Beast finally sat down when he saw Trent leave the restaurant. He looked at me, and I knew my face was passive and stony.
The waitress arrived with our orders. The french toast looked great as usual, but I had no appetite. The waitress had asked if we wanted anything else, I looked to her. “A box. I’ve lost my appetite, and this way, he can take it home.”
She shot me a puzzled look, but nodded and turned to the counter.
Beast looked at the table and to me. “Janie, don’t let–”
“How long?” I asked, and my voice was croaky.
He looked confused, and I had a limited amount of time before I lost control of my emotions.
“How long have you been a father?”
“She’s fifteen months old, but I’m not–”
I held up my hand. “You’re lucky, is what you are whether you realize it or not.”
“Wasn’t lucky when I found out she’s not my daughter.”
I shook my head. “I’m hanging on by a thread here, David. Whatever the circumstance, you’re lucky to have a child you could raise.” I slapped my chest. “I don’t have that privilege.”
The waitress was approaching with the box, and grabbing the keys in one hand and my purse in the other, I left the restaurant as quickly as I could.
Beast ran after me, but being a burly man, he had more obstacles in his way than I did. He charged out of the doors just as I pulled the vehicle out of the space and rounded the corner of the building to get out of the parking lot.
I drove down Kingsley toward the condo, but I knew that wasn’t where I wanted to go. Andrea’s studio wasn’t but three blocks from me, but I didn’t want to lean on her again. Worse yet, that would put her in the middle of this, and I definitely didn’t want to do that.
My lawyer’s warning about reporting any and all interactions with Trent hit me and I decided to head to Ortega. I didn’t want to see my lawyer, but there was no telling if he’d want me to be in the office or not to take my information. As I crossed the Ortega river I decided I would stop at a park.
Jacksonville was notorious for parks. If there was a scrap of land where a bench could be bolted to the ground and nature could be absorbed, a sign would be slapped street-side declaring it to be a park. It struck me strange how small many of the parks were, but at a time like this I was rather grateful for it.
I veered off Highway 17 and pointed the car toward Stinson Park. It was on the banks of the Ortega River where it met the St. Johns River. Like some of the other parks it was cramped, mainly because there was just enough room for a playground and a few benches. There was also a public dock and many people would come here to fish. One parking space was open, so I wedged the Versa in it and killed the engine.
With my phone in hand, I dialed the law firm. I spoke to a paralegal who told me Craig was in with a client, but she took my information and said he would call me back when he was available. That done, I got out of the car and walked toward a bench.
Two or three moms were at the park overseeing their small children playing on the colorful playground. I wandered past them and found a bench in the shade with a limited view of the water, which I thought might prevent anyone from making an approach to me.
Not two minutes went by before my phone rang. I answered it without looking at the display because I thought it would be Craig.
“Hello?”
“Honey! Where are you? Beast just called Liar and they’re worried sick about you.”
I tilted my head back, looking at the tree limbs above me and gray clouds overhead. “I bet they are. Tell them I’m fine. Where I am doesn’t matter, Andi. I just...I gotta handle this on my own. I’ve leaned on you way too much already.”
That was the truth. I knew it was all crap timing between me and Beast, but I had goals. First to get out of my marriage, and then to start a family. The second goal would be a longer time coming because I wanted to have a man by my side for that, but my worst fear had come to pass.
In the last four years, I had become my mother. I loved my mother, but she was riding high on the hog on the back of her husband and that suited her just fine. That wasn’t me. Somehow in the hullabaloo of Trent making office and his ambition to get to the next office, he had talked me around to leaving the traditional work force. His dreams and his goals had become my work.
Even though I lost the baby, I would always love my little peanut because he or she opened my eyes to what was fundamentally important in life. Family.
I had been putting carts before horses, though. Hanging out with Beast after that first foray at Andrea’s was one thing, but beyond that, I shouldn’t have said word one to him. Then having sex with him and thinking things could evolve to something else, that was lunacy on my part. So I deserved the gut-wrenching pain I was feeling right now. I needed to focus, and it wouldn’t happen with another man in my life.
“Janie!” Andrea said, with a sternness I hadn’t heard, ever.
“Andrea. I mean it. I’m fine. I’ve been in touch with my lawyer and honestly, I’m waiting on him to call me back. Okay? I’ll call you later, when I know more.”
“He’s trying to get his name removed,” she said, and my eyebrows came together.
“Andi, I really–”
“It’s why he came to Jacksonville, Jane. He hated the idea of being in a town with a little girl he thought was his daughter, but isn’t. Gosh, if I didn’t already love Liar, I might’ve fallen for Beast when I heard his story. He desperately wants that little girl to have her father and mother together. I don’t know all the details, but I guess the real father had been deployed–”
It sounded interesting, but I had to shut Andrea up. “Andi, I’m serious. This isn’t all about Beast. Trent said a lot of things, and he’s done some things, and just...I can’t right now. I’ll call you later.”
I ended the call and my damn phone rang in my hand, but luckily it was the law firm.
“Janie Ramos,” I answered.
“Jane, Craig here. Listen, my assistant shared your conversation. Are you driving?”
r /> I shook my head, and as I started to speak a nearby church bell began to toll the top of the hour. “No, I’m at Stinson Park.”
“My wife and daughters love that park. Stay where you are, I’ll be there in ten minutes.”
“Craig, you really–” I started, but the phone beeped twice, telling me the call ended.
AS I SAT ON THE BENCH, Andrea’s words rolled through my mind followed quickly by Beast’s. Wasn’t lucky when I found out she’s not my daughter. My stomach plummeted. I couldn’t imagine that. Having your world ripped away from you, and I didn’t even have the full story.
Anger began to well in me because it was clear Trent orchestrated that scene. He could manipulate things, no doubt, but he had never stooped so low before. Clearly, Paul had been a busy bastard in the past thirty-six hours or so for Trent to tell me he was going to bury me if I didn’t come home while he was campaigning, I couldn’t imagine how he could think he could do such a thing. Then I had to wonder how I never noticed what a jackass he really was.
I heard footsteps, and I saw Craig was approaching.
He sat down and ran through what I said to his paralegal, and asked me to confirm it. I moved my head side-to-side a little.
“There’s a photo,” I said, my voice laced with shame.
In reality, I kind of wanted a copy of that blurry photo. Even if it was hard to tell it was us, I wanted a copy of it because it was so intimate. Our heads were together, and I couldn’t remember what we were talking about, but Beast was sharing with me, skin touching skin, the sheets over us. I wanted to remember that, even if I could never have it again. Not to mention, that was between me and Beast, it was private and damn sure not something Trent could lord over my head.
“Okay, Janie. I know this is hard, but I’m gonna need more than that if I’m gonna be able to help you.”
I turned sideways on the bench so I faced Craig. “Trent’s campaign manager took the photo. I’m guessing on his phone, but it was taken through a gap in the curtains with heavy zoom so it’s fuzzy. It isn’t during the act, so to speak. We were in the bed with the sheet over us and we were talking. The quality is so bad, it’s really his word against ours that it’s even us, but it is.”
Craig looked at me, and then did a double take. He leaned out from the bench so he could see the far side of my face. “What happened to your face, Jane?”
I closed my eyes. Going to breakfast with Beast, he was used to seeing my face with the mark from Grind hitting me, I didn’t even think about putting makeup on it. Had I not repositioned myself, Craig likely wouldn’t have seen it either.
“Trent’s blackmailer, Grind, cornered me on Monday and he backhanded me. That was his way of telling Trent to hop-to, I guess. It’s also what drove Beast, uh, David to take me out of town, which led to Paul finding us.”
Craig leaned forward with an elbow at his knee and he rubbed his brow. “Do you happen to know the name of this Grind individual?”
I shook my head.
He looked toward the river, nodding. “You’re not gonna like this, but you need to press charges.”
My lips twisted to the side. “You’re right. I don’t like that idea. It happened in Orange Park, so that might slow the media down a touch in figuring out the wife of a county commissioner was assaulted, but...I can’t imagine how well that’s going to go over. With Trent, or the man who hit me.”
Craig shook his head. “It needs to be on record, Janie. You were right when you mentioned Trent was pulling strings to get a judge he knew to preside over the divorce, and I’ve filed one motion due to conflict. That’s already delayed things by at least a week. We get this on record...”
He trailed off, and I squinted at him. “Are you saying you want the media tipped off?”
“I did not advise that. I know when a crime has been committed, it should be reported. You need to report that, and while the mark is still relatively fresh. I will say, we don’t have many weapons in our arsenal, but that’s likely to be the biggest one.”
“I wouldn’t call it a weapon seeing as how it’s more of a minefield.”
He grinned. “Yes, but we’ll know we’re walking the minefield, as opposed to being blindsided.”
I took in a deep breath. “Well, I guess I’m headed to Green—”
“Wait, you said it happened in Orange Park. Try the Town of Orange Park police first. Could help us more, seeing as it’s a better chance they don’t rub shoulders with county commissioners.”
I smiled at Craig. “Right you are. You wouldn’t happen to know anyone specific?”
He pressed his lips together. “Sorry to say, I do not. I’ll let you get to it. Call the office when it’s done.”
My sense of dread while driving to the police station was alleviated by Pandora’s uncanny, though it was really just algorithmic, ability to play songs I needed to hear when I needed to hear them. Kesha’s “Praying” filled the small cabin of the rental, and it was like hearing the song anew. Every bit of that song applied to me and Trent. It also reminded me I needed to send him back the keys to the BMW.
I LEFT THE ORANGE PARK police station with a packet of papers and feeling defeated. The officer who took my information was skeptical at best and cynical about my situation at worst. I couldn’t fault him for it, seeing as I truly should have reported the incident back on Monday.
Not having a name for Grind didn’t help matters either. I had texted Andrea to find out if Liar knew the man’s full name, but she had yet to get back to me. When I was in the car, I locked the doors, and called the law firm as Craig requested. For some reason, I didn’t want to go to the condo. The problem was I had no idea where I did want to go. My stomach growled and I realized I definitely needed to eat. The clock indicated it was a little after one in the afternoon, so I motored to Firehouse Subs.
Half-way there, my phone rang with Andrea’s name on the display. “Hi, Andrea. I’m sorry I cut you short earlier.”
“It’s okay, honey. Sorry I didn’t text back. Liar doesn’t know this guy’s full name, but he seriously wanted to know why you wanted it. Where are you? It sounds like you’re driving.”
“I’m going to Firehouse on Kingsley. Where are you?”
“At the studio. Are you genuinely headed to Firehouse and not Gibbs?”
I narrowed my eyes at the windshield. “Um, why on earth does it matter? Part of me has a hankering for something besides pastrami. Why?”
She sighed and then chuckled. “No joke, Liar and Beast left here for the same Firehouse not ten minutes ago.”
I shook my head. “I can’t believe this. Trent gave me no limit of crap about eating processed meat and putting on weight, and now I know Beast likes pastrami as much as I do, and I can’t go get a sub without running into his ass?”
She giggled. “I know you don’t find this funny, but God I love the way the universe pulls things together in the craziest of ways.”
“You would,” I deadpanned.
“You’re still gonna go there, right? You’re not pulling a U-turn unbeknownst to me, are you?”
I sighed. “Seeing as I’m two and a half blocks from there now, yeah. I’m still gonna go there.”
“Excellent,” she whispered.
ON OPENING THE DOOR to the sandwich shop, my first thought was of The Godfather. Wasn’t there a rule of thumb in that movie that said, you never sat with your back to the door? I couldn’t believe Beast would sit with his back to the door. Liar watched me enter, but gave no indication to Beast that I was there.
I was a regular at this shop because of its proximity to my home with Trent. Jabar, a teenage African-American working behind the counter, noticed me and grinned. “Welcome to Firehouse,” he said in his low voice.
“Thanks,” I responded, when I arrived at the counter.
“You havin’ a Steamer, Janie?” he asked.
I shook my head. “I was debating between tuna and a meatball sub.”
“What? You gon’ dis your past
rami today?”
I shrugged.
Jabar leaned closer to say quietly, “Well, we’re out of tuna.”
Shaking my head, I made a snap decision. “Fine, I’ll take a Firehouse Hero instead. No mustard, please.”
“You got it. That gonna be a combo?”
I nodded.
He put a cup on the counter, told me my total, I paid and took my cup to the soda fountain. Putting the lid on my drink, I heard a chair scraping the floor. I grabbed some napkins, a bag of chips, and turned toward Liar and Beast’s table. Only, Liar was striding out the door, and Beast was looking at me with a blank face.
I walked over to him, but before I could put my cup down, he asked, “So, you’re here to read me more of the riot act?”
My eyes went up, but I forced them back to his. “No. Believe me when I say, I get it more than most. Whatever Trent said this morning was all about Trent, even if it was all pertaining to you. He said that to get a rise out of me, got it, and I was too far gone to get out of that zone he put me in. I realize that now. I’m sorry for overreacting. I know good and well what was said is only one side of the story —if that, quite frankly. So, please. I want to hear your side of it.”
He looked at me dubiously.
“May I sit with you?” I asked.
If I hadn’t been watching closely, I’d have missed his tiny head tilt toward the chair, giving me the go-ahead.
I put my things down and sat, but he just stared at me. After a moment, I rolled a hand in an effort to get him to speak, but that might have been a little too much.
“I’m serious. Tell me what’s really going on, because I know what was said this morning isn’t the full story.”
CHAPTER 21
Beast
FOUR MONTHS EARLIER...
Beast saw Liar come out of the bedroom at the hospice facility. His cousin’s eyes were bright and bloodshot. Liar’s chin lift was mixed with a head nudge toward the door. Their grandmother was dying that day, it was a matter of hours, so Beast shouldn’t drag his feet, but he did not want to go in that room.