by Debra Kayn
"The older I get, the more it seems like you've always been a part of my life. Do you know I've been with you longer than I was with my parents?" She reached over and squeezed his arm. "No, I haven't forgotten anything either."
Her hand lingered on him until he turned the car. It was going to be a long night if she expected him to keep his hands off her.
Instead of being around her in a crowded room, where he believed she'd be more comfortable and not feel any pressure, he wanted to take her anywhere else. Home. The beach. A dinner for two. Somewhere he could touch her.
Five minutes later, he walked her toward the front door of the hotel. He kept his hand on her lower back, slightly caressing her. When he bought the dress, he hadn't been aware of how much he liked the easy access to her skin.
"I'm a little nervous," she whispered as they walked through the door.
"Don't be. It's a bunch of stuffy doctors."
Her lips quirked. "Are you calling yourself—?"
"No." He pulled her close and kissed her temple. "I'm nothing like them."
He led her into the room, made introductions with Dr. Strawn and his wife. Then, he escorted her to the table they'd share with Dr. Brown and Dr. Laski and their wives. After everyone exchanged names and pleasantries, he leaned close to her.
"There were two choices for dinner. Steak or chicken. I ordered one of each, figuring you'd want steak, but if you'd like the other, we can switch," he said.
She put her hand on his leg under the table and said, "Steak is fine. Thank you."
When her hand moved, he caught it and put it back on his thigh, twining her fingers with his. She looked at him again, and he kissed her temple. They'd never had a time where they could show each other affection in public.
When she was at St. Mary's, he'd discouraged her from being too familiar with him around others. They wouldn't understand and would question his relationship with her. He was a professional. It would've sent red warning signals to the staff, the parents, and the children. Then, when Katie was finally an adult, it was his own weakness that made him discourage her from touching him.
"Katie Meihoff." Dr. Brown set down his wine glass. "Any relationship to the late Mike Meihoff?"
She turned away from Race to face Dr. Brown. "Yes, he was my father."
From what he knew, her father had been a malpractice attorney. While he never met the man, thankfully, he'd lost all respect for what kind of father would allow the neglect and verbal abuse to happen to his child.
Dr. Brown looked at Race. "If I remember correctly, Meihoff represented Cole Thompson when he was sued by the family who lost their daughter to suicide after being released from the hospital. Meihoff saved his career."
He'd heard the story, of course. Any malpractice suits were used as examples in any meeting that'd been held regarding policies.
Katie refrained from replying. From the outside, she kept her composure as if interested in the conversation making its way around the table.
But, out of everyone's view, she had a death grip on his hand.
"It's probably more exciting to sell houses than listen to a table full of doctors," he said, low enough for her ears.
"Yes, I'm more comfortable negotiating with other people's money." She gave him a shaky smile.
"You mean, you're stubborn." He chuckled. "I'm glad you ended up enjoying what you do."
She nodded. "I do. It's a lot of work when it's busy, like now, but the hunt to find the perfect home for someone is challenging, and the payoff is nice."
"Ever think of flipping a house?" He sipped from the glass of wine. "I knew a guy years ago who was a realtor and discovered house flipping was a lucrative enough business, he dropped his license. He ended up traveling to different areas, buying, renovating, and selling."
"Some people can do that. There was a realtor in Newport who started a small company with a few buddies, and that's what they did. It always sounded too risky to me, but then again, I don't know anything about construction or costs from that end of the business."
"Newport?" He rubbed his jaw. "That's where you went?"
She looked around the table and then nodded, looking down at her lap. "It's where I stopped and stayed."
He brought her hand up from his leg and kissed her fingers. "You came back. That's all that matters."
Her chest expanded. He put her hand back on his leg when the food was served. There wasn't much opportunity to talk during the meal, and his appetite had fled being around a crowd. Tonight was more of an excuse to have her with him while he attended an obligation. He hoped after dinner, the activities would make it up to her, and she'd enjoy herself.
Chapter 39
After dinner, the emcee for the night encouraged everyone to walk into the adjoining conference room and partake in the auction where all profits would benefit the mental health wing at the local hospital. Katie held Race's hand, following along with him. She was out of her element.
Most attendees were at least twice her age and wealthy. If that wasn't enough to intimidate her, knowing they worked with Race, she tried to be on her best behavior and not ask anything immature or ignorant, so as not to embarrass him.
Though Race seemed unaffected by the crowd. He kept touching her, holding her hand, whispering in her ear. Her nerves were shot. She shook so bad, all through dinner, she was afraid of knocking over her wine glass or dropping a piece of her food down the front of her dress.
She couldn't wait to get out of here. All she wanted to do was be alone with Race anyway.
The announcer called everybody's attention to the front of the room. Race stayed where he was and brought her in front of him, holding her hips.
As a long list of names were read, thanking them for their donations, she wasn't surprised to hear Dr. Race Conner's name. For how supportive he'd been to her growing up, he probably helped a lot of people, not to mention the hospital.
Race leaned down and put his lips on her ear and whispered, "We'll leave as soon as they call my name again."
She nodded.
The winners of a silent auction were announced, item by item. She leaned against Race, letting her mind wander.
He had a way of grounding her to the moment and making her question everything. Those questions couldn't be silenced.
Since coming back to Astoria, she'd been caught up in the emotions centered around telling Race he was a father, pushing her way into his life again. She hadn't considered if he felt tied down by her return
There were times, she could feel the anger rolling off him. She understood why.
If roles were reversed, she had no idea if she could forgive someone for keeping her child from her. In fact, she knew forgiveness would be impossible for her. But she hadn't planned on getting pregnant. Race had made it clear the night they'd made love, several times, that he would never allow their love affair to continue in the way she needed to be with him.
He wanted her to be older and more mature. To him, she would always be younger, no matter if she was a mother, had a career, and owned her own house. He'd struggled with the laws of being a psychologist, knowing he wasn't permitted to love her. Being a doctor was essential to him. He was a professional, and while he wanted her, he knew he couldn't have her.
She turned in his arms. "I need to talk to you."
"In a minute."
"I need to know what you want from me." She held on to his jacket. "Why did you bring me—?"
"Dr. Race Conner has the winning bid for the trip for two to Hawaii," shouted the announcer.
He frowned, gazing between her and the front of the room. "I need to get this."
He walked away from her. Being with him, touching him, was something she'd dreamed about for the last five years. And, he was still putting barriers in front of her.
As he disappeared in the crowd, she looked between the bodies and tables, unable to see where he went. Noticing open doors to the side of the room, leading outside, she slipped out of the room onto th
e patio.
Breathing in the cooler air, she gulped for breath. Had she misunderstood Race when he'd confessed to wanting her?
She thought he'd gotten past being angry at her for having Callie without telling him. Maybe he was still punishing her.
Maybe tonight's dinner around his colleagues reminded him of what he stood for and solidified his belief that he couldn't be involved with a current or past patient.
It'd taken her five years to stop breaking down every time she thought of him. It'd taken five years of being angry that he wasn't there to help her with Callie. It'd take five years for her to find the strength to come back to Astoria, and she'd worked hard to make that happen.
Had it all been for nothing, and he was never going to allow them to be together?
She walked to the railing. The lights on the Megler Bridge lit up the caps of water as the tide came in on the sandbar. She shivered, drawn to the water.
Water swift enough to wash a person back to the ocean. In one second, life could be taken, swallowed by the greatest force on earth.
She couldn't lose Race again. They were destined to be together. Couldn't he see that their lives were entwined?
The brisk breeze washed over every surface of her skin. She shivered as if Race had lightly trailed his finger down her spine.
But, he was inside. Once again, shutting her down when she was ready to take a step toward him.
"Chilled?" Race stepped up beside her. "Let me give you my coat."
She shook her head. It was on the tip of her tongue to ask him to take her home. She'd had enough disappointment and sadness in her life, losing Race again would be too much.
"What were you trying to tell me inside?" he asked, leaning his forearms on the railing to look at her better.
Instead of answering his question, she said, "Do you know how many times I've imagined standing out on the sandbar? The tide would come in, just like it is right now."
"Katie." He straightened and brought her closer, pulling her into the V of his legs.
"But you always showed up to rescue me," she whispered. "Every single time. It was always you."
His gaze intensified. He cupped the back of her head and captured her lips.
Every pent-up frustration and every insatiable need came roaring out of her. She kissed him back with as much passion as he gave. Clinging to him, she tilted her head, needing more.
Her legs shook, wanting to wrap around him. There wasn't enough of her body feeling him.
She needed his weight on her, his arms around her tighter, his hands touching every inch of her.
He pressed against her hard enough, her body bent to his will. The railing at her back, she couldn't go anywhere but toward him.
Race broke the kiss and buried his face against the sensitive part of her neck, breathing heavily. His hands sprawled, holding more of her.
She wrapped her arms around his head, not letting him push her away, walk away, deny their love.
The lack of bright light on the patio, the low whoosh of the water, and the privacy away from the others helped push away her inhibitions when out in public. Her heart raced, and the blood pounded in her head, tottering on the edge of consciousness.
Against her neck, he said, "There are a hundred reasons why I should walk away from you, and none of that matters. I don't give a damn what society says about our relationship or the ethics board. I love you, Katie. You're mine. You've always been mine."
"Promise me." She clung to him tighter. "Don't take it back. Don't turn me away."
"I'll get down on my knees to make you stay." He cradled her head in his hand. "I can't live without you again. I'm tired of fighting what was right in front of me. I love you more than any book or medical study can explain, Katie."
He lifted her head and kissed her hard. Her heart hammered against him. She sobbed into his mouth. Her hands desperately trying to feel every inch of him.
"I love you." She sobbed, peppering him with kisses. "I need you."
"Let's get out of here," he mumbled against her mouth. "I want my family with me. I want you with me."
"Yes." She panted, finding herself standing on her own, and reaching for him again.
Race took off his jacket and put it around her shoulders. Then, he tucked her against his side and walked toward the other end of the patio.
"First thing Monday morning, we'll make this legal." He held her tight. "Nobody and nothing can stop me."
Barely making out the steps through her tears, she hugged his side. The need to go home and continue what they'd started moved her forward.
Chapter 40
Katie continued to sleep. Race removed the blanket covering her nude body.
For all the years Race had known Katie, he'd only seen her naked body for less than twelve hours. He was going to make up for lost time.
Desire hit him like a lightning bolt. He trailed his hand over the curve of her hip. His cock hardened. She would never understand how deeply she was a part of him. Damn those who would judge him on the ethical principles he'd sworn to uphold.
They weren't him. They weren't her.
There was a force behind their love that was unbreakable.
He questioned everything he knew, what he preached to his patients, and his method of delivery. Love wasn't changeable or replaceable. Sometimes, on the rare occasion, love was born between two people and becomes impossibly possible.
Katie stretched, pointing her toes, and mewed. That soft sound wrapped around him.
He hooked her waist, bringing her back to his front. Spooning her, he cupped her breast and gently kneaded. Her hips pressed back as her upper body moved forward, closer to his hand. He rocked against her, sliding his cock between her legs.
She blindly reached behind her and patted his hip and sighed. "How long have you been awake?"
He kissed her neck. "Couldn't sleep."
"Hm?" She sleepily rocked with him. "Is my bed uncomfortable?"
"Your bed is perfect." He reached down and moved his cock to the entrance of her sex, sliding inside of her from behind. "It's the woman in the bed. I don't want to close my eyes. I'm scared you'll go away."
She moaned and slipped her hand over his, twining their fingers. "I never really left you. I was always yours, and I'm never going to be more than ten feet away from you for the rest of my life."
"Ten feet is too far." He glided inside of her. "I want you this close."
She nodded. Her body squeezed his cock in approval.
Letting go of her hand, he lowered his arm and slid his finger over her mound, finding her clit. There was no rush, except his own passion fueling him. Rubbing her, he slowly stroked his hardness inside of her as she rocked against him.
He gazed down her body. She fit against him perfectly.
There was never a more beautiful sight in front of him than her. His heart, rejuvenated after barely living the last five years, pumped life back into him.
Katie moaned, arching her neck against his arm. He palmed her forehead, turning her slightly, and watched the moment her climax gripped her. The slight gasp coming from her open mouth and ecstasy relaxing her face brought his own release.
His body quaked. She weakened him in the best possible way.
He kissed her. "I love you."
"I love you, too." She blinked her eyes open and smiled tenderly at seeing him with her in bed as if his cock wasn't still inside of her and his arms around her. "Good morning," she whispered.
"Morning." He kissed her again.
"Do you think we can stay in bed all day?"
"We're probably lucky that we've had this long." He chuckled, and understanding passed between them, and they both whispered, "Callie."
He slipped out of her and let her go to the bathroom while he cleaned up and got dressed. It was Friday, and he'd canceled all his appointments, knowing after taking her out last night that he wanted today to be about his family.
Ten minutes later, Katie walked out of the bed
room, wrapped in a towel from her shower. He leaned against the dresser and folded his arms, watching her pick out her clothes and get dressed.
"I want you and Callie to move into my house. Our house," he said.
She straightened and raised her brows. "Okay."
"Okay?"
She nodded. "I want to come back home and raise our daughter with you."
"Monday, we'll get married."
"Okay." She smiled.
"I won two tickets to Hawaii. We could buy an extra, and take our daughter on our honeymoon."
Her eyes lit up. "Okay."
"You'll stay naked any time you're in the house." He cocked his brow, challenging her.
She laughed softly. "Already making demands?"
He walked to her and tilted her chin, forcing her to look at him. "How does that make you feel?"
She caught her lip between her teeth and wrapped her arms around him. "Excited. Happy. Loved."
He kissed her lips. "Good."
He exhaled in contentment. "I never asked you why you bought this house?"
"Hm." She rubbed her lips together. "There was only one reason."
"What was that?"
"To be close to you." She kissed him. "Only you."
"Mommy," called Callie from outside the room. "Why is your door shut?"
Katie gazed at Race and whispered, "I think Daddy should answer that one, don't you? We don't want to traumatize her."
He kissed her quickly and walked across the room, opening the door. Callie rushed in, stopped, and looked back at him. A smile broke out on her face, and she tackle hugged his legs.
"Did you come over to watch me ride my new bike?" Callie put her arms up.
He lifted her. "I'm going to eat breakfast, watch you ride your bike, snuggle with your mommy, and then we're all going to pack up a few things and spend the night at my house. Sound fun?"
"Yes." Callie hugged his neck. "Let's go eat now."
He put his daughter down and watched her run off. Katie approached him and slipped her hand into his.
As he walked with her down the stairs, she looked at him and shook her head in amusement. He brought her hand up to his mouth and kissed her knuckles.