by Leah Ashton
“Will the car be trackable by the Notechi?” Beth asked, once they were both inside.
“Possibly,” Damon said. “Probably unlikely, but it’s a risk. We’re just taking it into town to the Pinjarra police station so I can make some phone calls.”
It was only a five-minute drive on dark, empty roads. The police station was a low rectangular building on the main street across the road from the shopping centre, and they parked right out the front.
But before they got out of the car, Damon turned to Beth.
“I’m going to show them my badge and use their phone, but not tell them anything. It’s highly unlikely the cops on night shift have anything to do with what just happened, but I’m not risking your life on an assumption.”
“Our lives,” she corrected.
He nodded sharply, then opened the car door.
Inside, the cop on the front desk took them straight to a small office, then left them alone. Damon rang a mobile number from memory, but it took several rings before someone answered.
“Sheps,” Damon said. “It’s Nyhuis. I have a problem.”
Beth couldn’t hear the other side of the conversation, but Damon did most of the talking, summarising the events of the past thirty minutes or so.
“Someone inside the police has to be providing information to the Notechi,” he continued. “What just happened is supposed to be impossible, and yet somehow the Notechi knew where Beth was, and the surveillance was either turned off or intercepted, and the phone signal scrambled. None of that is easy to do, but even if all that was provided to the Notechi was Beth’s location, Knife clearly has the contacts to do the rest.” He paused. “This is far more sophisticated then what I thought he was capable of, Sheps. This isn’t good.”
A moment while whoever Sheps was responded.
“I need a car, I need a place for us to stay, I need a phone. That’s it. I’ll sort out the rest, Beth will help. We’ll be fine.”
He looked at her now as the other man replied.
“Who is she?” he said, holding her gaze. “She’s magnificent. That’s all you need to know.”
Beth’s heart flipped over as she heard the other man laugh loud enough for her to hear him.
“Yeah,” Damon said. “I didn’t think I’d ever say something like that either.”
Then his attention was back on the other man, and Beth stood just a few metres away, watching him.
He was so tall and strong – so much like the man she’d met on Friday night. Dark, dangerous, sexy, intense, compelling. But on Friday, it had all been a fantasy really, it had all been about being swept up in the moment, of giving in to lust and attraction, and ignoring the complications of reality. But since then, every moment they’d spent together had been real – at times a frightening, brutal reality. But other times, it had been intensely real in beautiful, unexpected ways. There’d been so many moments of trust, of belief, and of strength between them. Of lust and connection and – for her at least – of love.
The reality of being with Damon Nyhuis was a million times better than the fantasy they’d started with.
How could it had been little more than forty-eight hours since this all started? It seemed impossible, because Beth knew she was a different person now, that this weekend had changed her, just as she’d said to Damon.
Except, she’d said that while accusing him of pretending he didn’t know they’d changed. Yet here she was, pretending too.
Damon could’ve died tonight, so could’ve she. It was unacceptable that how she felt could continue to be hidden from him – whatever he felt for her.
She was brave and strong. Damon had taught her that.
He hung up the phone, and turned to face her.
“Oscar Shepherd is my old sergeant, from when I first joined Elite SWAT. We can trust him, I promise.”
He paused, waiting for her to respond.
“Of course I trust your judgement, Damon,” Beth said. “Although I have to point out that I also don’t have any other options.”
That made him smile. “A car will be here within the hour,” he continued, “and although Sheps will need a bit more time to find us longer-term accommodation, he’s got a holiday house a few hours further south from here. We can go there for now.”
“Okay,” she said. “Then what happens after that? How will I get my new identity?”
He shrugged. “We’ll work it out ourselves. You’re not having anything to do with Witness Protection again.”
She was totally fine with that. “So, you and Oscar will find me a new house, sort out some fake ID or something, just like what Witness Protection were going to do.”
It still sounded unbelievably lonely and depressing. Suddenly, she couldn’t look at Damon any longer, it only reminded her of how much she was about to lose, and with no one around to support her as she attempted to put her heart back together.
“Yes,” Damon said. “Except for one thing. You’ll have me with you.”
Her gaze jerked up. “Pardon me?”
“You don’t think after what happened tonight, I’m just dumping you somewhere and hoping for the best? Jesus Christ, Beth, how many times do you think I can handle you almost being killed—”
“Is this a guilt thing?” Beth interrupted urgently. “Are you feeling dreadfully guilty since the only reason I got kidnapped is because you picked me up at that bar?”
“Am I feeling guilty that you almost died because I wanted to fulfil my filthy teenage teacher fantasy?”
She narrowed her eyes. Why was he teasing her now?
“Of course I feel guilty for that, Beth. I’ll feel fucking guilty for the rest of my life that I put you in the position I did. But you know what?” He stepped closer. “I’m also glad. Really glad. Because if none of this had happened, then I wouldn’t be here with you now, and I wouldn’t know what I do about you.”
“And what’s that?” she asked, so surprised at his words she could barely think straight.
“Didn’t you hear what I just said to Sheps? He’s going to give me shit for calling a woman magnificent for the rest of my life. No way would I do that to myself if I didn’t mean it, Beth.”
“It is rather flowery language,” she said, her eyes prickling – still unsure where this was going. But hopeful. So hopeful.
He took another step closer. “Beth, you told me I was pretending this weekend didn’t change us, and you were right. I was pretending, or ignoring it – something like that. I have changed, Beth – you have changed me.” He swallowed. “But I still don’t think I’m the man you deserve. I still don’t think I’m the man I know you believe I am – the good man, the future great father. All the things the man you love should be. But what’s changed these past few days – how you’ve changed me – is that now I’m strong enough to leave that decision to you, not me.” He reached for her hands and laced their fingers together. “If you can shoot at murderous bikies from a moving SUV with zero firearms training, I can fucking well tell you how I feel.”
She smiled, holding back the laughter that threatened to bubble up from deep inside her. Laughter and joy – but first, she needed to let him finish. She needed to be sure.
“Beth,” he said. “I love you. I’ve never said those words, ever, to anyone. I …” He paused, and his lips curved into a smile, although she could see the caution in his gaze. “Am I allowed to say I hope you love me too? Because it will be fucking awkward living together until the trial otherwise.”
Beth laughed out loud and squeezed his hands, tugging him even closer, so they were as close as they’d been at that bar. Close enough that if she breathed, her breasts would brush against his chest.
“I love you, Damon,” she said. “I love you because of your flaws, because of the past you’ve overcome, and for the man you are today. I love you for how you make me feel, for how you make me believe in myself – and I hope one day, I can make you believe in yourself too.”
He pulled his hands from
hers so that he could wrap his arms around her as he pulled her flush against him. He looked down at her, and his gaze had all the intensity of when they’d met at the bar, but now it was layered with what they’d survived together, what they’d experienced together – and how they simply were together.
Stronger, braver, better.
He kissed her, and Beth tangled her hands in his hair and kissed him back in a way that now felt familiar – but their kiss, there was nothing routine about their kiss. As always, having Damon’s mouth on hers, having his hands on her body – it was extraordinary. It was perfect.
But when they came up for air, Beth had to be honest. She had to be honest just as he had.
“Damon,” she said, “I still want a baby. A family. I can’t pretend you haven’t told me you don’t want that, no matter how much I love you.”
He nodded and held her gaze. “I need time, Beth,” he said. “I need to better understand this new me who can’t imagine not being in a relationship with you, when I’ve rejected relationships forever. I need to get to know myself, who I really am, if not the broken teenager I’m only now realising I’ve never let go of.” His hands squeezed her hips. “But I won’t waste your time. I won’t lie to you about this, and I won’t string you along. I just need … time.”
She took a deep breath, her fingers massaging little circles on the sides of his neck. “That’s okay,” she said with a smile. “I don’t think I’ll have much time the next few months for finding another potential father for my children. Can’t imagine hiding from an outlaw bikie gang provides much opportunity for dating.”
Damon practically growled, and she laughed out loud, stood on her tiptoes, and kissed him lightly. Then she stayed where she was and whispered against his mouth. “Let’s give us both time to learn who we are now, and who we are together. But this is important to me, Damon.”
“I know,” he said against her lips, then closed the infinitesimal gap to kiss her again. “I love you,” he said. “I won’t forget what’s important to you.”
There was knock on the office door, and when they both turned, an awkward looking young cop in uniform was visible through the glass panes in the door.
He opened the door just a crack – and likewise, Damon and Beth loosened their embrace – just a little. This was all too new, too exciting – too perfect – to not be touching as much as possible.
“There’s a car here for you,” the cop said. He held out a large yellow envelope. “This is also for you.” His expression was curious. “Hey, any chance you can let me in on what’s going on here? I know from your badge you’re in Elite SWAT, and that’s my goal for my career too.”
“Nope,” Damon said firmly. “And if you ever want to be in E-SWAT, you’ll never mention we were here to anyone, including your sergeant.”
The cop nodded immediately. “No problem. Any other tips? I hear the selection course is brutal.”
Damon looked down at Beth, his gaze conflicted.
“Just the one thing,” he said, eventually. “Don’t ever think that the men and women of Elite SWAT are perfect or above reproach. We all have our weaknesses, our strengths, our flaws, our pasts. A great cop, and a great member of Elite SWAT is great because of all those things, not despite them.”
The young cop just looked confused. “Uh …”
Beth smiled. “You’ll get it one day,” she said. Then she looked up at Damon. “And so will he.”
And the office door had barely clicked shut before Damon kissed her again.
Chapter Sixteen
Four weeks later
Damon slowed his car to a stop at the gates to the secure apartment complex where he now lived with Beth. It was in Lane Cove, a suburb not far from the Sydney CBD. It was a huge, characterless high-rise with nothing much going for it except for an oversized balcony which Beth had already begun to fill with mismatched pot plants.
He swiped his access card and drove into the underground car park. He’d sold the car provided by Oscar Shepherd for cash and bought a second-hand white sedan as nondescript as the apartment block, also for cash. He had a fair bit of experience of living in deep cover, although it was a lot more difficult when you didn’t have the Elite SWAT machine behind you creating your paperwork and false life history. But after what had happened at the safe house, he wasn’t trusting anyone. Now, he even wondered at the reason he was kidnapped. Clearly, Knife hadn’t had the full information about who he was, but the Notechi had thought he was snitching for a reason, and who had provided that reason to them?
It all meant that he’d refused Oscar’s offers for E-SWAT to assist them, beyond a guarantee he’d still have a job when he returned. But otherwise, they were on their own. He hadn’t touched his bank accounts either, as he couldn’t trust that his true identity hadn’t been discovered by the Notechi. If not straight away, it could happen at any time. He simply had no idea how deeply the WA police had been infiltrated.
He parked his car and headed for the lift. The car park was as deserted as it usually was at this time of day. Sydney may seem a strange place to hide, but in many ways, it was far safer than an obscure country town, as over here amongst a population of five million, their arrival had gone totally unnoticed. Even after almost a month here, the other people who lived in this apartment complex were far too busy to even ask their names, which suited them just fine.
They both had new jobs, although neither he nor Beth had attempted to find jobs in their real careers. This was mainly because creating a work history and qualifications in their fake identities was near impossible without expert assistance, but also because they didn’t want to resemble their true selves in any way. It was just too risky.
The lift arrived at the fourteenth floor, and their apartment was right at the end of the hallway. Inside, the flat was empty, but the sliding door out to the balcony was open. He could see Beth watering her plants out there, her newly blonde hair shining bright beneath the late afternoon sunlight.
She looked up from her task as he stepped out onto the balcony, her face immediately forming into a big smile. She pushed her prescription-less librarian-style glasses up her nose and walked over to him for a kiss.
“Any news from Shep?” she asked, after a very thorough welcome home kiss that left her voice all breathy.
He’d finished his job labouring at a CBD building site several hours before Beth’s shift as assistant manager at the local IGA ended, and had had time to come home, shower, then go buy a fresh, untraceable SIM card for his weekly call with Shep. He stayed in touch for updates on the meth operation, but also for updates on the investigation into what had happened at the safe house.
“Nope,” he said. “Nothing. They still have no idea who hacked into those cameras, or how they knew we were even there.”
It was concerning how little progress had been made, but there was nothing he could do about it from here. What he could do was make sure that Beth stayed safe. When it came down to it – that was all that mattered.
“You okay?” she asked, looking at him curiously, and he nodded.
“Very okay,” he said. Despite having to hit pause on the career that had consumed his life, he didn’t regret a thing. His temporary job was boring as fuck, but it wasn’t forever. They’d be back in Perth eventually.
But what did feel like it could last – should last – forever, was this. This simple domesticity with Beth – greeting each other after work, making dinner, watching Netflix.
Not quite as exciting as the first forty-eight hours they’d spent together, but the best bits of that time, that hadn’t changed. The chemistry between him and Beth hadn’t cooled one bit. If anything, familiarity was only breeding Beth’s confidence. And he loved that.
She read his mind, and reached for the buttons of his long-sleeved shirt – one of many he’d got into the habit of wearing to cover up his tatts. She’d undone a couple of buttons when he stilled her fingers.
He looked down at her. “Are you okay?�
� he asked.
She blinked, surprised. “Of course. I know this isn’t forever. It sucks being away from my family and my students, but—” she grinned and slipped open another button “—there are some perks.”
He grinned but stilled her hands again. “Shep and I talked about something else today, too,” he said seriously. “About my job when I return.”
Her eyes widened. “He’s not going to renege on giving you back your job, is he?”
“No, it was more me doing the talking, not Shep,” he said. Then swallowed. “I’ve asked if I can be transferred out of covert ops, and into another E-SWAT team.”
“Why?” She looked horrified. “But you love your job, Damon. I don’t want what you’re doing for me to destroy your career—”
“Stop right there,” he interrupted. “There you go again, casting me as the good guy.” But now, he made the allegation with a grin. “I’m doing this for me as much as you, Beth, you must already know that. All this time with you – what more can I ask for?”
But that was more truth, than teasing.
“And the job thing,” he continued. “That’s for me, too. Because I want to come home to you watering the pot plants, or reading a book, or waiting for me at the door naked …” She laughed out loud at that, but didn’t dismiss it, which Damon hoped augured well for future homecomings. “And that isn’t happening if I’m deep undercover. I need a more normal job. I suggested joining the bomb techs, or going back to tactical operations.”
Beth laughed again. “I’m supposed to consider defusing bombs for a living is a better option than covert ops?”
He shrugged. “Significantly reduced chance of kidnapping.”
“True,” Beth said. She shot him an assessing glance. “So you think you might want to keep living together, after all this is over?”