All I could do was smile.
“And more than that, I know you well enough to get what kind of woman you are, what kind of catch you are.”
“So…that’s it?”
“That’s it,” he said. “All we need to do now is get ready for the reunion, right?”
“Right!” I said with a big, stupid grin.
Time to roll.
27
PEPPER
Two weeks later…
Wednesday night meant burger night.
OK, pretty much every night was burger night at the Mack household. Sometimes they were In-N-Out, sometimes they were homemade, sometimes they were good old-fashioned McD’s. But if it was meat between a bun, we ate it.
Wait, that sounds kind of gross. We liked burgers—that works.
Tonight was takeout from the Apple Pan. Kind of a little celebration of the one-month anniversary of that amazing night Noah and I had together. Mary and Sophia didn’t need to know all the details, obviously, but they got that it was a special night.
“All right,” said Noah, clasping his hands together as we sat around the dinner table. “Who’s got the double bacon?”
“Me!” exclaimed Sophia, sticking her hand into the air.
“You sure about that, kiddo?” I asked, taking the bun as Noah handed it to me. “Double bacon? All on your own?”
“I’m more than capable of handling it,” said Sophia with an eager smile as I passed it over to her.
“Kid’s got a hollow leg,” said Noah.
“You’re so impressed,” I said. “I can tell just by your tone.”
“Of course I am,” he said. “What dad wouldn’t be impressed by a daughter who could eat her weight in meat?”
“Still think we ought to have her show a little restraint at the dinner table,” said Mary as she dipped a few fries into a small puddle of ketchup. “No boy’s going to want to date a girl who eats more than he does.”
“I don’t know about that,” said Noah. “Seeing this girl put away her burger and pie when we had this stuff a month ago… It was something else.”
“That right?” I asked. “Impressed by a girl who can eat?”
“Sure am,” he said. “And though Soph dating is about the last thing I want to think about, any guy who’s going to handle her is going to have to handle her massive appetite.”
“And love for burgers,” she said, opening her mouth surprisingly wide and taking a massive chunk out of the burger.
I laughed, ready to take a bite of my own.
“Hey, Pepper?” asked Sophia once she’d swallowed her first mega bite. “Do you think we could go to the Tar Pits tomorrow? They’re doing a really cool exhibition on woolly mammoths.”
My eyes went wide, and I quickly shared a look with Mary and Noah, who both smiled. Sophia and I had gotten along from the get-go, sure, but this was her asking me to take her out one on one—a real girls’ day out.
This was big.
“Sure, Soph,” I said. “If it’s cool with your dad. Maybe grab some lunch while we’re out?”
“’K,” she said, turning her attention to her burger.
The last few weeks had been killer—no other way to put it. Noah and I had been getting closer by the day, and I’d even been making headway with the ever-protective Mary. And this new development with Sophia was something else.
I knew it was only a short time, and I knew it was crazy to think it, but I was already starting to feel like this was something almost like a little family.
My phone blowing up in my pocket snapped me out of my happy reverie. But I ignored it, turning my attention back to my food.
But then it buzzed again. Then it had the weird double buzz of multiple texts coming in at once.
Then Noah’s started to go off on the counter.
“I need to check this,” I said, taking my phone out of my pocket.
There were texts—many, many texts. One from Penrose, one each from all the girls, one from Moira.
“Holy sh—,” said Noah. “I mean ‘holy shoot.’”
“What is it?” asked Mary, her tone already worried. “Is something wrong?”
I went through the texts, totally shocked and unable to believe what I was reading.
And apparently Noah felt the same way.
“Are you kidding me?” he asked. “Are you freaking kidding me?”
“What?” asked Sophia.
“Noah,” asked Mary, now even more worried.
“It’s the book,” he said. “It’s already out.”
“About two months ahead of schedule,” I said. “Someone leaked the thing!”
And there was more. The text from Penrose wasn’t pleasant in the least—nothing but the words “My office. Now.”
He was never one to even text to begin with. A message from him had the same effect on me as hearing my full name from my dad.
Noah checked his phone.
“It’s Moira,” he said. “She’s at the office. Says she wants to talk to me. Good freaking thing—I need to talk to her too.”
“Then let’s go,” I said.
“Mom,” said Noah. “You mind keeping an eye on—”
“Of course, of course,” she said. “You two do what you need to do.”
He ran over and gave both of his ladies a kiss. “OK,” he said. “Let’s hit it.”
The two of us were off. Five minutes later we were in his Aston, and twenty minutes after that, we were at the offices. The place was surprisingly bustling for being so late in the evening. All the eyes latching onto the two of us as we entered made it clear that the staff had already learned what was going down.
“I’ll find Moira,” he said. “You do what you need to do with Penrose.”
“Got it,” I said.
We shared one last lingering, almost hesitant look before parting. Once I arrived at Penrose’s doors, I took a breath and knocked.
Silence.
Then a stern, “Come in.”
After steeling myself, I opened the door and stepped through. Penrose was there, his normally light, airy charm replaced with pure steel. Marcus was there two, watching me like a hawk and saying nothing.
“Sit,” he said.
I did.
“Leaked,” he said. “How the hell does this happen?”
“I don’t know!” I said. “All I can think is that Moira uploaded it onto the cloud or something, and a tabloid got a hold of it. You know the buzz is insane for this book.”
“What about Moira?” asked Marcus. “That girl leak it, maybe?”
“Why would she do that?” I asked. “She’s under contract.”
“She’d be fucked if she did,” said Penrose.
The he turned his attention back to me.
“It’s very simple,” he said. “You figure out what happened, and you get this situation under control. Part of being in charge is having the buck stop with you. And consider it stopped.”
“I’ll meet with Moira right now,” I said. “Figure it out.”
“Good,” he said. “And keep me posted. Your job’s hanging in the balance.”
I mumbled out a “yes-Mr.-Penrose-of-course” as I hurried out of the chair and off to Moira’s office.
I had words for that one, and they weren’t good ones. And my whole spiel was formed in my head, ready to go, as I put my hand on the knob to Moira’s office and pulled the door open.
But I wasn’t ready for what I saw.
They were kissing. I couldn’t believe it.
“Pepper,” Noah said, gently pushing Moira away. “It’s…not what it looks like.”
But Moira was all pleased smiles. “It’s exactly what it looks like,” she said.
That was the last straw. Something inside me snapped, and all I could think to do was get away as fast as I could.
I ran down the halls of the office, tears streaming from my face.
“Pepper!” shouted Noah.
But I didn’t even want to look at t
he prick. Thankfully, moments later I was alone in the elevator and heading down.
Over the span of an hour my life had gone from “perfect” to a disaster. My job, my man—both lost.
For the first time in as long as I could remember, I felt lost.
I had no idea what to do.
28
PEPPER
Two days later…
My apartment was a total mess. Like, more than it usually was. The pile of delivery food containers was bigger than usual, and in true depressed-girl-cliché form, there were a couple of empty ice cream containers among them. Different flavors, though—had to mix it up a little while languishing in the depths of self-loathing.
Two things played in my head over and over again—the chewing-out to end all chewing-outs from Penrose, and, of course, walking into the office right as Moira and Noah were about to get started with a freaking make-out session.
Part of me wished I would’ve chewed him out right there, taken out a little anger. Might not have fixed the situation, but it sure would’ve made me feel a hell of a lot better.
But between the leak and the chewing out and everything else, I couldn’t handle it. Even my job was in jeopardy—Penrose was still in the process of damage control from the leak, and he’d suggested I might have to offer my head up on the chopping block. The stress I’d been holding back broke loose, and all I could think to do was get out of there.
The worst part, however, the part that really made me want to step over to the nearest mirror, look myself in the eyes, and say “seriously?” was that…I kept think about the guy. And not just in a “fantasizing about wringing his neck or throwing a drink in his face or somehow doing both at the same time” kind of way. No—in an “I actually kind of miss the guy” kind of way.
Sure, he’d done me wrong in the exact kind of way you’d expect from a rock star—big words, big promises, big hope, but in the end he couldn’t help himself. But that didn’t mean there weren’t good parts to what we’d had.
Mainly, I kept thinking about burgers. Sounds crazy, sure, but hear me out. I kept thinking about the two us of eating together, how I felt totally fine letting my hair down and going crazy on a big, juicy, bacon cheeseburger and finishing it all off with some pie à la mode. It wasn’t just the food, as killer as the Apple Pan was. It was that I felt comfortable around him, felt like I didn’t have to have my guard up and that I could simply be myself. He’d brought that out in me, and I know I’d brought that out in him.
And then there was him and Soph, how being around them together for two seconds was enough to realize how crazy he was about the girl, and how much she meant the world to him. And one kid wasn’t enough—he’d dedicated his life to making sure even more kids than her had bright futures no matter what kind of background they’d come from.
Then…there was the sex. God, it’d been something else. The way he’d made me feel was like nothing else, and I knew it was the kind of sex that could only come from feeling comfortable around someone, knowing that you could give yourself over and be in good hands—literally and figuratively.
Sure, there was a good chance this thing with Moira was only the tip of the iceberg. If they’d been bold enough to try to hook up at the office, then there wasn’t a chance in hell that they hadn’t been taking full advantage of their “interviews.” But even if what Noah and I’d had was a lie…it sure as hell had felt real at the time.
The trashy reality TV was a din, and my eyes blurred over the pictures that I was hardly paying attention to. Only the vibration of my phone on the other side of my tiny living-room-kitchen combo caught my attention.
I hated to admit it, but as I trudged through the mess I kinda sorta hoped it was Noah. I had no idea what I’d say to the guy, or what lame excuse he’d offer up, but it was the first place my brain went.
But the phone kept buzzing, and I realized it wasn’t a text—it was a call. I never got those anymore. The phone had Shania’s name and picture on the front, and I picked it up.
“What’s up?” I asked.
“What’s up with you is what I’m more worried about—haven’t heard from you since the S hit the F.”
“That’s on purpose,” I said. “Not really feeling up to facing the world.”
“Well, that’s too bad then,” she said
I was confused. “What? Why?”
“Because the crew’s all here, and we’re dragging you out of your cave.”
“You can’t be serious,” I said.
“Serious as it gets. And we brought grub. So come on and let us in, unless you’re cool with leaving us out here in the wild.”
I wanted to argue, but with Shania I knew it wouldn’t do a damn bit of good. “OK, fine,” I said. “But no promises on getting dragged out anywhere.”
“Sure, sure.”
With that, I hung up and went over to buzz the ladies in. Sure enough, two minutes later, the girls were barging through the door, bags of food in their hands that I recognized right away.
“Tell me that’s not Apple Pan,” I said as the girls took their seats among the trash and set out the food.
“Why, you got a problem with burgers?” asked Katy.
That was all I could take. I dropped into the nearest seat and let out all the tears I’d been holding back, my crying coming out in ugly, snotty, sobbing wracks.
“Aw, Pep!” said Sam as she sat down on the side of my chair and put her arm around me. “I’ve never seen a girl get so upset about burgers before!”
“It’s…it’s not just the burgers,” I said, struggling to compose myself. “It’s Noah.”
“What about him?” asked Shania.
“Our first real date,” I said in the weakest, most pathetic voice imaginable. “It was...”
Then I gestured weakly toward the Apple Pan bags.
The girls all went “ohhh” at the same time, and I went right back to my tears. They comforted me through this second cry sesh, and when I finally felt ready to speak I went right into my next worry.
“And the reunion,” I said. “There’s no way I can go now.”
“Lover Boys are still playing,” said Katy. “Booked and everything.”
“And on top of that I look like a total failure,” I said. “All anyone will be able to think about when they see me is the book leak—my name was all over that project.”
“You can’t let that get you down,” said Katy.
“Easy for you to say,” I said.
“Maybe so,” said Katy. “But you know that if you let all of this prevent you from going to the reunion, you’re going to be beating yourself up for it.”
“How about this,” said Shania, her eyes lighting up. “Why don’t you just skip it?”
I cocked my head to the side. “Skip it?”
“Yeah,” said Shania. “Skip it. It’s only a stupid high school reunion after all.”
I couldn’t believe that I hadn’t even considered the idea. It had been like the reunion was some unbreakable obligation.
Shania went on, picking up that I wanted to hear more. “Screw it all,” she said. “Screw Noah and screw George and screw Moira and screw all this stupid crap. You’re better than it, and any minute you spend letting it get you down is a waste.”
“Then what would we do?” asked Katy.
“Vegas,” said Shania. “Road trip. Withdraw some cash, have some drinks, and cut fucking loose. I don’t know what we’d get up to, but it’d sure as shit be better than the reunion.”
God, it sounded nice. Just forgetting about it all and having some fun.
“But,” said Sam, “that’s just letting them win.”
Fuck. She was right. Not showing my face would make it clear that they’d all gotten the best of me. Even if I didn’t have to know what they thought exactly, I’d know what I’d done, and why I’d done it.
“Right,” said Katy. “You decided to go to this thing for a reason.”
“Can’t even remember what it was
at this point,” I said.
“To be a bad bitch who doesn’t give a shit,” said Sam with a grin.
“To show that you’re not scared of anything,” said Katy. “Not some jerkoff ex-fiancé, not some teenage cosplay chick, and now not some D-bag rocker who doesn’t give a shit about your heart.”
“You don’t need to be scared of these assholes,” said Sam. “Because you’re as tough as they come.”
Shania shrugged, suggesting they made a good case.
In spite of myself, I felt…a little better. The girls were working their magic.
“And you’re going to prove it,” said Sam. “Right now.”
“Huh?” I asked.
The girls regarded one another with scheming expressions, as if they were all thinking the same thing.
“You know how they say eating your feelings is a bad thing?” asked Shania. “In this case, it’s going to be healthy.”
Katy reached forward and took one of the burgers, unwrapping it and handing it out to me.
“Take a bite,” said Shania. “Chew it up and spit it out just like you’re going to do to those jackasses.”
“But don’t actually spit it out,” quickly added Katy. “That’d be gross.”
The greasy burger was right in front of me, and I’d be lying if I said it didn’t look damn good.
I grabbed it and held the thing in front of my mouth.
“OK,” I said, feeling motivated as hell. “I’m ready.”
I took a breath and then a bite.
It was delicious. Tasted like kicking ass. If that even had a taste.
The girls weren’t done with me after we finished our meal. Together we grabbed some garbage bags and got to work cleaning up the mess I’d let build up around me in the apartment. When that was done, the four of us whipped out our phones and did some online shopping, picking out some killer outfits that would leave the people at the reunion with their jaws on the damn floor.
Dream Lover Page 18