by Penny Wylder
With a final push Julian settles inside me, waiting for me to adjust to his size. He looks down at where we’re joined, and the look on his face…It’s like awe. It makes my breath go tight in my chest, something deep and powerful pulling at me. He looks up at me, and I know he feels it too.
I squeeze down on him, and I see his jaw clench. Then I wiggle my hips, and I grin at him, daring him to play with me.
Julian’s mouth crashes onto mine, his hips driving into me like the dam on his control has suddenly been broken. God, he feels so good, lips and body and cock and hands all working together with mine to create a perfect storm of pleasure. I wrap my arms around his waist, and even though it feels like I can’t, I take him deeper. I’m gasping, the tip of him hitting that place so deep that no one’s ever reached it before. I see sparks behind my eyes growing into fireworks with every stroke. My orgasm is suddenly close, everything about it crowding my senses, and I grab his shoulders.
“Too fast. Too soon.”
His mouth finds mine again, the kiss he gives me slow and languorous and totally at odds with the deep pounding of his cock. “Don’t worry, little dancer,” he whispers in my ear. “I promised to make you come all night, remember?”
I do remember, and I’m not entirely sure that a full night of him won’t kill me. He reaches between us, just tapping my clit with his fingers, and I explode. Screaming. I wrap myself around Julian, using him as an anchor as my orgasm rips through me. Fierce, devastating pleasure makes me shake, my pussy clamping down on his cock. I hear him groan, but barely through the roaring in my ears. It’s like lightning in my limbs, a bright flash, gone as soon as it came, and I fall back onto the bed, quivering.
“Shit.” Julian laughs, and I feel it everywhere, considering that he’s still hard, still inside me. “You didn’t come,” I say.
He nips at my neck, following the scrape of his teeth with gentle sweeps of his tongue. “Good thing I have plenty of time for that. I’m not stopping now.”
I’m still catching my breath, but the way he looks at me makes me feel like I have no oxygen at all. “All night?”
“All. Fucking. Night.”
He thrusts into me again, burst of pleasure crashing through me, and I close my eyes. I don’t ever want him to stop.
Seven
The next night, the air is cool and perfect as I lean against my car, waiting for Cosette. We drove in together today, since we started our shifts at the same time, and agreed that we’d drive home together. I figured she’d be right out, but she’s late. The ride here was tense and quiet, everything that’s been building up between us feeling like a wall that’s too thick to break through with words. But her even agreeing to ride with me feels like a step in the right direction considering how she’s been avoiding me. On top of everything else, I think she’s seeing someone and hasn’t told me who. Cosette is usually bursting with details about her sex life.
I’ve heard her bring someone back to the apartment a couple of times, and I haven’t asked her who it is. I would feel a little hypocritical asking for details about her love life when I’m not willing to share the details of mine. It’s strange, wanting to be the one who spills all the details, but somehow, I don’t think she’d like that I’m sleeping with our boss. I don’t want to do anything to push her further away from me or make her more unhappy. I want to tell her about Julian…I’m just not sure exactly how to do it. I glance at my phone. It’s a half-hour since our shift ended, and I’m tired. Maybe Cosette forgot that we were going straight home and got caught up talking with someone? It happens. I toss my bag in my car, and head back towards the club to look for her. I’m halfway to the club when Cosette stumbles out of it, wrapped in the arms of a man. She’s giggling, and I can already tell that she’s drunk. More than drunk, she’s wasted. I know that laugh. The way they’re lurching, he might be drunk too. Together they stumble across the parking lot towards a car, and for a second, I can’t move. What the hell is she doing? Getting in a car with someone who’s just as wasted as she is?
I find my feet again, running across the lot to her. I call her name a second before I reach her, grabbing her shoulder and turning her around. “Cosette!” She spins towards me, glaring. “Where are you going? I thought we were going home.”
“Home?” drawls a male voice. “That sounds boring. We’re going to do something much more fun.”
I feel sick to my stomach as I look at Randall. I guess I’m not the only one who was sleeping with the boss. Only I was wrong, Randall isn’t wasted. Or rather, he’s not wasted enough that he doesn’t know exactly what he’s doing with Cosette in the state that she is. I type out a text on my phone as fast as I can.
I need you. Parking lot. Hurry.
“Cosette,” I say gently, “let’s go home.”
“No!” she practically spits the word in my face. “I don’t have to do what you tell me to. I don’t have to do what anybody tells me to because I’m a fucking adult, got it?”
Shit. I close my eyes. This isn’t just a wasted Cosette. This is the Cosette that calls me sobbing because she’s made a bad decision that she can’t take back and doesn’t even remember making. I love my best friend, and she’s the brightest, most beautiful person I’ve ever met. With a tendency to self-destruct if she’s upset about something. Which means that letting her go with Randall, even if she was sober enough to consent, is a really fucking bad idea.
“No, sweetie,” I say, “I can’t tell you what to do. But I’d really love it if you came home with me. I just want to make sure you’re okay.”
“I’m not okay, and you’re not gonna be the one who makes sure I’m okay, okay? Randall is gonna make sure I’m okay.” She turns to him, planting a kiss on his lips, and he takes full advantage, spinning her against the car and starting a full on make-out session.
I grab his shoulders and pull him off her. “Get the fuck off her. She’s not sober enough to say no, so she sure is hell isn’t going with you.”
Randall sneers at me, “Are you her mother? You don’t think she’s going to love every second with me? I’ll make sure she has a real nice time. And if she doesn’t remember some of the things that happen?” He shrugs.
“You’re an asshole,” I say.
“Stop it!” Cosette screams at me, “Just stop it. You don’t know what you’re talking about, Libby. Randall is helping me.”
“Oh really? How is he helping you? Other than using you for sex while you’re drunk?”
She gets in my face. “He’s going to help me be better. He’s going to help me make more tips, show me what the people want. I’m going to be the best dancer in there and Randall is going to make sure of it.”
I take a deep breath, desperately trying not to scream at her. But she’s wasted, and logic isn’t going to work here. “I can’t let you do this, Cosette. It’s dangerous and unprofessional.”
Cosette bursts out laughing. It’s a cackle that cracks across the parking lot, loud and brassy. “Are you fucking kidding me? You don’t have any right to judge me. I know you’re fucking the boss. I know you’re fucking Julian fucking Rivers. I saw him at that audition, and of course he was watching you. Everybody is always watching you. And it was MY AUDITION. You were supposed to just sit there and support me but you had to take some for yourself didn’t you? You always have to take some for yourself. You just can’t let me have this one thing. And now you can’t even let me fuck the boss just like you. You don’t want me to have any of the special treatment you’re getting because you’re selfish. Fuck off, Libby.”
She collapses against the car, suddenly crying after her outburst, and Randall moves to put her in the car. I step between them, staring him down. “I swear if you touch her you will never have children or proper sex ever again. How many times have you done this with her?”
He smirks at me. “More times than you want to know. I’m surprised you didn’t notice. After all, didn’t you hear us when you were home?”
I think
I might throw up. He was in my apartment, taking advantage of my best friend. I’m going to rip his head off. “If you know what’s good for you,” I say with more calm than I feel, “you will back the hell up.”
“What are you going to do?” he asks.
Just then I hear footsteps on pavement, and I feel my shoulders relax. Julian. I look back at him, and he takes in the situation in a glance, that piercing observation taking in the state of both Cosette and Randall. “How many drinks have you had?” He directs the question at Randall.
“That’s none of your business.”
“The hell it isn’t. You’ve got car keys in your hand and it looks like your about to drive off with one of my employees.”
Randall rolls his eyes. “You can stop with the act, Rivers.” He gestures in the air. “The precious employees. We all know what the dancers are here for. You’ve got yours,” he points at me, and then he points at Cosette, “and I’ve got mine.”
If there were a look that I would call thunder, it would be the one on Julian’s face. “You are fired. Because of your behavior you will receive no severance, and if you ever set foot in my club again, I will call the police to have you removed. Leave. Now. I would recommend not driving in your state, but you’re a grown man, and you can make that choice yourself. But if you’re open to advice, don’t be an idiot as well as an asshole and take a cab.” And then he looks away from him, completely dismissing Randall as if he never existed. He turns to Cosette, now crying hysterically, crumpled against the side of the car. “We’re taking you home.”
“No!” Cosette struggles as Julian tries to lift her to her feet. “I don’t want to go back there. I don’t want to go with her.”
Julian glances at me, and I sigh, “I’ll explain later.”
“Where’s your car?”
I point across the lot. He nods, and then, without warning, scoops Cosette up and puts her over his shoulder. She fights him the whole time, but she doesn’t land any kicks. I know just how strong those arms are, and there’s no escaping that grip. He can take the punches she’s throwing at his back. I unlock the car for him, and he lays Cosette across the back seat, and she stops fighting, at least a little bit. She’s still crying and mumbling.
A screech of tires sounds behind us, and I turn to watch as Randall’s car peals out of the parking lot way too fast. I look at Julian, and his face is hard. “He made his choice,” he says, though I can see the concern on his face. Randall may be a complete dick, but I wouldn’t wish him dead. I sigh, ducking into the driver’s seat, mentally preparing to get Cosette into the house and into bed, just like I have dozens of times before. I startle as the passenger door opens and Julian gets in, and he grins while I stare at him.
“What?” he asks. “You didn’t think I would just leave you alone after that, did you?”
There’s a warm glow in my chest, spreading from his words. I shake my head. No, that’s not like Julian. It will be much easier to deal with this if I’m not alone. I take a deep breath and start the car, pulling out of the parking lot and toward home.
Eight
It’s not an easy task getting Cosette into the house and into bed. Julian helps with the first part, and I do the second. It’s a familiar routine of undressing and tucking in and turning off the lights. I leave a glass of water by her bed, and the four pain relief pills she’s going to need for the hangover in the morning. I’d bet money that she doesn’t make it to work tomorrow. I can’t imagine recovering from a binge like this and going in for a full shift of dancing. That combination only ends in one way: vomit.
I shut the door quietly, and go back into the kitchen where Julian is waiting, arms crossed. “You can bet every member of the staff is going to get an explanation about the purpose of the dancers in the club, and what they’re not there for.” I’ve never seen him look angry like this.
“Randall is a dick, but I can’t imagine anyone else at the club doing what he did?”
“Well I’m going to make sure of it.”
I nod. “Good.” I step into the circle of his arms, and they’re comforting. I like the way I fit against his chest.
“Is she going to be all right?” he asks.
“Yeah,” I say. “She does this sometimes.”
“Just does this?”
I get myself a glass of water too. “Yeah. If she’s upset or sad about something she’ll get really drunk and make bad decisions. I usually end up getting a phone call at four in the morning, so it’s nice that I was able to stop this.”
Julian gives me a hard look. “You’ve done this how many times?”
I laugh. “Too many to count. You get used to it. I knew something was wrong. It’s been wrong for weeks, but she won’t talk to me, has been avoiding me. I don’t know what to do or how to make it better.”
“How long have you been friends?”
I go into the living room and flop down on the couch. Julian sits beside me. “Forever,” I say. “We met in dance class when we were like five. Both a little weird and on the outside. We were just…friends after that. We never stopped.”
Julian frowns a little. “I just ask, because you’ve told me so much about your life, but never about Cosette.”
“Yeah…” With the state of our relationship so weird, Cosette has been hard to think about. I think back for something to tell him. “She’s my family. After my parents died, she was there for me the whole time. I don’t know where I would be without her. She’s gorgeous and unpredictable. You never know what she’s going to do, and that’s kind of great. Like when we were young and I was the lead flower in our ballet recital, she stole my costume. We didn’t find it until minutes before show time. I had so much adrenaline that it was the best I’d ever danced up until that point. She told me later that she did it on purpose, and now we laugh whenever it comes up.”
He gives me a small smile. “Tell me more.”
“She missed our high school graduation because she met this super sexy drummer and went to get high and make-out with him. The bitch,” I laugh, shaking my head. “I’d put her in my speech and everything.”
“Speech?” Julian asks.
“I was valedictorian. Oh, and last year she decided that she was going to move to Italy and be a model. I had a job with this fashion company for half a second and so it kind of took over her brain. I think she still has an Italy collage on her wall.” I look at Julian, but he’s not smiling. “What?”
He clears his throat. “Well, those stories have something in common.”
“Yeah, Cosette’s craziness.”
“No,” he shakes his head. “The fact that she’s jealous of you.”
I make a face. “That’s absurd. Cosette isn’t jealous of me. I’m nothing to be jealous of.” But even though I say the words, a sliver of ice goes through me. Her words in the parking lot ringing clear in my mind. She certainly did seem jealous. Of me and Julian. Of the fact that I have a job at the club at all.
Julian chuckles. “I would disagree with that statement, but I want you to think about it. It’s not your fault that she’s reacting this way, but if you’ve never talked about this, never acknowledged it, and that’s the problem? It’s going to keep happening.”
“Yeah.” I feel numb. Like someone’s plunged me in a tub of ice water.
Cosette is jealous of me. Now that he’s said that, it seems like it’s been there in neon lights all along and I somehow managed not to see it all this time. And I’ve been so blind thinking something was wrong, that she was just being Cosette and that she would get over it. I’m a fucking idiot. And everything she said tonight, she believes that. She believes that I had no business auditioning for the club, that I’m getting special treatment because of Julian. And am I? I guess in a way I am, I hadn’t thought of the tips as special treatment—more of a way to get the club riled up—but I haven’t seen him tip any of the other dancers the way he does me.
“You okay?” he asks.
I nod. “Yeah, I think
so.”
He smiles. It’s a slow smile that makes my stomach warm. “Good. I was hoping to see you tonight, under better circumstances. But since we’re here…” He leans in to kiss me, and I can’t. I just can’t. I place a hand on his chest, and he freezes.
“I’m okay,” I say, “but I can’t do this tonight.” After everything that Cosette said, he can’t be here when she wakes up. Or worse, she can’t wake up still drunk and find us fucking on the couch. What kind of friend would I be, throwing that in her face knowing that’s what’s bothering her? But I don’t know how to say all that to Julian. It’s not his fault. This is between me and my friend. So tonight, I’ll send him home, and we’ll deal with things in the morning.
His eyebrows are raised in surprise. “All right.”
“I have…some things to think about, and I think it’s better if she wakes up to just me.”
“You kicking me out?” he says playfully, with a half-smile and eyes sparkling.
Dread spreads in my chest. “I wouldn’t put it like that.”
He draws a finger down my cheek. “I’m teasing you, little dancer. I’m surprised, but I understand.”
“Thank you.”
I walk with him to the door, and he gives me a soft kiss goodbye. “I drove you here,” I say suddenly, realizing.
“It’s pretty much the one reason cabs were invented.”
It surprises a laugh out of me. “I guess that’s true.”
“I’ll see you tomorrow?” he asks.
“Tomorrow.” But as he walks away, I feel uneasy, like there’s something I missed that just changed between us.
Nine
I hear stirring from Cosette’s room when I come back into the house in the morning. She was still asleep when I left to get us our favorite hangover food—chocolate chip pancakes. I also bought a Gatorade the size of Arizona itself for her because she’s going to need it.