by Renee Rose
“I want this,” I whisper. “I want you.”
Dimitri shifts me in his arms. Suddenly, I’m under him. His body is over mine. He doesn’t let his full weight fall on me, but I’m trapped in the most delicious way. His legs are heavy and much longer than my thinner ones. His arm and shoulders bracket my head—I can sense their weight depressing the bed. But all that flies out of my head when he lowers his hips until they meet mine.
Slowly he moves over me, dragging his cock against my swollen folds. I have to remind myself to swallow and breathe. He’s really, really large—a fact I somehow glanced over when I tried to blow him.
“Gwen,” he murmurs. “My Gwen.”
His. I like that. I widen my legs and tilt my hips to meet him. “Please, Dimitri.”
“Are you sure, babygirl?” He sounds lost.
“I’m sure. We’re meant to be.”
He reaches down and plays with my folds, finding my clit and rubbing the itchy spot alongside it with the rough pad of his thumb.
I squirm. “Please, Dimitri, I need you.”
But he ignores me. He slides down and eats me again, making me climax on his tongue. Then, while I’m shuddering, he glides over me. “I’m free of STDs and incapable of having children,” he tells me. “But if you want me to wear a condom, I will.”
“You’re sure? Totally incapable?” I don’t know why that makes me sad.
He nods. His cock is already at my entrance.
“No, it’s all right.” Aurelia would say I’m too trusting, but I believe Dimitri.
He nudges his way in.
It hurts. It burns. But like with the butt plug, my body soon stretches. I squirm and moan while he stills over me, letting me adjust.
“You’re beautiful, babygirl.”
“So are you.”
His lips twitch, amusement dancing over his face. I keep my eyes glued to his as my body starts to relax. Need grows louder than the discomfort and I roll my hips up to meet his, taking him a little deeper. I drag my lower lip between my teeth and moan.
“That’s it, babygirl. Take my cock. Do you like how it feels?”
“Y-yes,” I warble. Because I do like it, but I’m also a little afraid of it. That the pain might return.
As if he read my mind, he says, “It only gets better from here, beautiful. It only hurts the first time.”
He eases out—just a smidge—then pushes back in.
Ooh. Heaven. Still twinges of stretching and pain, but also, the thrust was so dang satisfying.
“Again,” I request.
His smile is indulgent. “I’ll let you make the demands this one time, little one. Only because I need you to show me what you’re ready for.”
“I’m ready for more,” I assure him, rolling my hips again.
He arches an elegant brow. “More like this?” He withdraws further this time—so much that I fear he’ll pull out, and my hips chase his—but at the last moment, he reverses, pushing back in, all the way to the hilt.
“Mmm.” I moan my appreciation. The feeling is delicious. “Again, please? Sir?”
“You like that?” He repeats the motion, just as slowly, bringing just as much satisfaction.
“I love that,” I affirm.
He increases the speed and I tighten my knees around his hips, my body a live wire drawing more and more current.
“Mmm.” This time, my vocalization has little more desperation to it. A pleading quality.
Dimitri changes his rhythm, taking shorter, punctuated strokes, slapping against my ass and legs each time.
“Ohh!” I exclaim, my mouth opening to the shape of the syllable, eyes widening. Like so many things Dimitri has taught me, I didn’t know how much pleasure could come from such simple but varied acts.
“Are you okay, babygirl?”
I bob my head. “I’m okay,” I pant. More than okay. I’m fantastic. “Please, Dimitri.”
He leans on one hand beside my head, brushing my hair back from my face with the other. “Please, what, my lovely Gwen?”
Um… I don’t know. All I know is that I need something. Need more. “More, please.”
His smile widens, and he pumps harder. My body skids up the bed, but he catches my shoulder to brace me. “Like this?”
I arch my breasts to the ceiling. “Yes!” I moan. “Please!”
“You sweet, beautiful thing. How can you be so trusting? So open? I love the way you give yourself to me.”
He loves to watch me give myself to him. Those words fill me with warmth.
“I love to give myself…”
For a moment, his eyes cloud, like he’s about to tell me why I shouldn’t, but then he shakes his head and closes his eyes.
“—to you,” I clarify, in case there was any doubt. “Only to you.”
His eyes snap open and lock onto mine. There is a ferocity to him; that cool, manicured persona has cracked slightly, and I see real emotion beneath. He pounds into me, hard.
It hurts, but feels so good at the same time—like his spankings and other delectable tortures.
“Yes, Dimitri,” I encourage. “Please?”
He brings his thumb to my clit and rubs as he continues to thrust into me, fast and hard.
I scream, my muscles spasming and clenching around his cock.
He gives a shout and slams in deep, staying there.
I wrap my legs tightly around his back, pulling his hips in even closer, his cock even deeper. Keeping him there.
In this moment, I never want to let go.
Dimitri brushes my hair back from my face again and drops a kiss on my forehead, on my nose. On each cheek. Then on my lips.
“You’re so lovely, Gwen. How do you feel?”
“So good,” I murmur.
Chapter 5
Dimitri
It’s wrong how badly I want to defile my innocent flower. But what’s more wrong? I’ve broken all my rules with her.
Here I am spending a second night with her when I never, ever dip twice.
It’s been my rule for almost two hundred years. It’s what’s kept me sane.
Most people think vampires lose the ability to feel. To care. We have to shut it down to get past the pain of loving mortals and watching them die. Or to be able to survive the kill or be killed world of vampires.
And I’d thought perhaps I’d done it. I’d adopted a one night only rule to keep myself from ever getting attached again. And nothing had pierced my armor since.
Until this one.
How did she break the mind wipe I did on her? Her will is so flexible. Perhaps that’s her super power. Or could it be that she’s meant for me?
Fuck.
It almost hurts to look at her, she’s so beautiful. That means she would destroy me. This sweet, guileless, accommodating angel would literally rip my heart apart. Because I can’t watch another woman I love die.
I won’t.
Which means I can’t love.
I should take sweet Gwen home right now and wipe her mind. Re-wipe last night. Wipe tonight from her memories.
Except, she’s already here. I’ve already plucked her flower. I might as well indulge us both in a night of pure carnality. Show her a few more positions. A lot more pleasure.
And at the end of it all, I will make sure she never even remembers Club Toxic exists. Never strays there again.
“Are you sore, babygirl? Or are you ready for another round?”
Her lids, which had been at half-mast, open fully. “I’m ready for you. Anything you want from me.”
So accommodating. Submissive to the core. A complete angel.
“Oh, I know you’ll do my bidding, Gwen, but tell me what you want. Do you need to sleep now? Or are you still curious?”
She pushes up on her elbows. “Still curious.”
I smile. “Good girl. Let me show you one of my favorite positions.” I pull out and flip her over to her belly, then tug her hips toward the ceiling until she lands on her knees.
/> She tries to stand on her hands as well, but I gently push between her shoulder blades. “Chest on the bed, ass in the air, darling. Show me what a good girl you are.”
“I’m your good girl,” she says.
Why does that fucking kill me every time? The way she pledges her allegiance to me at every turn? I want to tell her she’s not my girl. She won’t see me again after tonight, but I’m incapable of hurting her.
I settle for the compromise. “You are such a good girl.” I gather her hair into a leash, as I had it before, and tip her head up. “Ass out, beautiful. Arch that back, my little kitty-cat.”
She complies and I rub the head of my cock through her juices. She’s still as wet as a fountain. Always ready, this one.
It’s easy to breach her entrance this time but I still go slowly, listening to her breath to know if I’m hurting her.
She merely hums softly.
“That’s it, babygirl. You look so pretty, offering yourself to me.”
Holding her hair like the reins of a horse, I ride her, slowly at first, then with more force, until I drop her hair and grip her hips to hold her perfectly still for my thrusts.
Never has a cunt felt both so tight and so welcoming at the same time. And when her muscles squeeze? I nearly lose control.
And I never lose control
At least, not in centuries.
I fuck her harder and harder, knowing it’s probably too much, that she’ll be sore from this pounding, but I don’t want to stop, and she doesn’t protest. On the contrary; she moans and whimpers in that high-pitched, pleading tone that drives me wild.
And then it’s too much for me. I lose my battle with lust, with control. With deSire. I dig my fingers into her flesh and fuck her so hard, the room spins.
I roar.
I come.
Something in me opens. Uncorks. A flood of emotions pour out of me—tangled ones that feel like love, heartbreak, grief, commitment.
Everything I’d experienced so long ago.
The last time I loved and lost.
The pain of watching the woman I loved die, and knowing I must live on.
Dammit. I can’t do this again.
Gwen
I had no idea sex could feel this good. I definitely need to make up for lost time.
Dimitri eases out of me, and everything’s perfect. Or so I think.
He climbs off the bed and walks swiftly to the window.
I look over my shoulder at him, still holding the position he put me in. His brow is knit, his closed fist rests on the wall.
For a moment, I think he’s going to be sick or something. Why did he race away?
I swing my legs off the bed, and he puts up a hand.
“Stay there, babygirl. Stay in bed.” He’s still not facing me.
I don’t follow orders. I scramble after him “What happened? Are you hurt?”
“No.” His chest rises and falls. He’s magnificent in the moonlight; a lean giant with a perfect profile. As I watch, he tosses his head back, groaning as if he can’t take in air.
“Dimitri?” I’m close enough to touch him, so I do.
His head snaps towards me.
I fall back a step. His canines are really long. Too long. “Dimitri, what’s happening?”
“Come to me, little one.” He opens his arms. I’m helpless in his thrall. I go to him. He half lifts me, easily cradling me against his chest.
“I knew this was a mistake.” He sounds mournful.
I open my mouth in a silent cry. First Chad, now him? The rejection hurts so much. “Did you not want me?”
“I want you, Gwen. I want you too much.”
His head moves so fast, I don’t quite follow it. I’m still processing the blurred motion when I feel a prick on the side of my neck. And then golden liquid pours through me, warm and delicious, like honey simmering in my veins.
“Dimitri,” I cry out as my orgasm crashes over me like a giant wave, carrying me away. I thrash in his arms, practically fighting, but he grips me tighter, his lips still fastened on my throat.
After a moment, he carries me to the bed and lays me down, licking the side of my neck.
“Did you just… bite me? What's happening?” I cup his face and turn him to face me. I need to see.
Sure enough, there are his canines, white and long and dipped in blood. My blood.
“You're not afraid,” he says with wonder, and reality comes crashing down.
I drop my hands from his face and straighten. “Are you going to hurt me?”
“No, little one. You won't remember.”
“But I want to remember.”
“It doesn’t matter,” he says. “You won’t remember me.”
It’d hurt less if he’d stabbed me in the heart. I move back, my hand on my chest. “What?”
“You can’t know this. You can’t know what I am. You can’t know me.” He continues in a low voice, as if talking to himself, “This can’t work. This isn’t meant to be. I can’t fall in love again.”
I’ve lived too long. I’ve loved and lost.
“You had to watch the woman you loved die because you live on,” I blurt, desperate to hold onto something. To snatch at the threads of this thing unraveling between us.
A deep sadness settles in his expression. “Yes,” he admits.
“We were together before, weren’t we? Last night? Did you make me forget?”
“You can’t know what I am,” he repeats, as if that explains everything.
“But I remembered,” I persist. “It didn’t work.”
“I’m sorry.”
He sounds like he’s apologizing for what he’s about to do, not for it not working last night. I swallow. “So, what are you going to do?” My voice comes out a lot more serene than I feel.
“Nothing terrible. Just a trick of memory, to make you forget.”
“How is that not terrible?” I come to my knees beside him. “Dimitri, I want to remember. Why would you send me away?”
He cups my neck. I lean into the caress until I realize what he’s doing. With a tug, he undoes the ribbon, the makeshift collar he gave me.
“No!” I grab it before he can toss it away.
“We can’t be together, Gwen. You’re human and I’m… I’m not.”
“You're a vampire.”
“Yes.”
“Why can’t we be together?”
“I told you before. You’re too good. Too pure. Too innocent. You don’t belong with one such as me.”
“That’s for me to decide.”
He shakes his head. “I… can’t. Not again.”
“You don’t want to fall in love.”
“It might already be too late for that, pet,” he says sadly.
He looms over me, big and dark and powerful. I didn’t realize how powerful, until now.
I have so many questions. Vampires exist? He’s a vampire? How did it happen? What is it like?
But most of all: is he serious? Is this the end of us?
I cling to the white ribbon. He tugs it from my fingers and hushes me before I protest. I relax when he doesn’t discard it, but carefully ties it around my wrist. “Something to remember me by.” He touches my lips. I open my mouth and tease the tip of his finger with my tongue. His breath catches, but he doesn’t take the bait.
“Come. I’ll hold you until morning.”
I don’t ask what happens after morning. He’s going to make sure we never see each other again. I slide between the expensive sheets and immediately curl into him to cuddle. Dimitri is the best cuddler. He’s also the best dom and best lover. I don't need to have a lot of experience or a ton of partners to know we were made for each other. We were meant to be.
“Go to sleep, little one.” He sounds so sad, I want to comfort him. I wriggle closer. His little kitten, cuddling for the last time.
“Forget me,” he murmurs, catching my gaze. “When you wake, you will remember this only as a beautiful dream. You left Cl
ub Toxic with a man, and he drove you home. The rest, you dreamed.”
I slip into a dream-like state.
“You will never go back to Club Toxic again.”
Chapter 6
Gwen
I wake to my phone buzzing. I’m at home, in my bed. My body is both supple and sore—like I danced all night in the arms of a stranger, working muscles I didn't know I had.
What happened last night? Something pricks the side of my neck. I reach up and touch the skin, but it’s unbroken. There’s no blood, no twin pinpricks, no tears. Why do I feel like something should be there?
I roll and grab the phone, and pause. There’s a white ribbon around my wrist.
The phone buzzes angrily, demanding I ignore it no longer. It’s Aurelia.
“Oh, thank God,” she says as soon as I answer. “I was freaking out.”
I remember texting her that I was hooking up with someone. But… did I change my mind? No; I remember his face. Or at least the way I felt with him.
God, why do I feel so sad? It’s like someone took an icepick to my heart.
I want to go back to the dream I was having. To my mysterious stranger.
“It’s okay. Thanks for following up.” I try to force a smile.
“Gwen? Are you okay?”
“Yeah.” My voice cracks a little. “I’m fine.”
“You don’t sound fine.” There’s a sound like she’s moving around her apartment. “What happened?”
“Um…”
“I’m on my way,” she says. I hear the clink of keys.
“No,” I say. “Don't come. I’m all good.”
“Keep talking,” she demands. “I’m not convinced. Why are you crying?”
“I’m crying because I’m happy,” I lie. I fiddle with the white ribbon on my wrist.
She makes a sound like an angry buzzer on Jeopardy. “Wrong, try again.”
“I’m crying because I had the best night of my life, two nights in a row. It was so wonderful, it seems like a dream.” The memories are blurred impressions. They keep sliding away, like I only imagined it all happened.
But the feelings, the sweetness and ecstasy, they were real.