Chapter 10
Tony sat in his room, the door closed tight against his mother. He had no confidence that she would ever be able to pull the plug on Emily. He was angry, depressed and frustrated with the irrational optimism that his mother continued to cling to. As his mind juggled with his few options, he finally came the realization that if his mother would not act, then he would have to do so himself. Tony had spent some long hours engaged in an internal conflict about what he had decided to do. In the end he had managed to convince himself that ending his sister's life would be nothing less than a kindness; it could in no way be seen as murder; Emily was effectively already dead. He would be bringing this turbulent time for himself and his mother to a swift and gentle end for all concerned. Emily would be left to rest in peace, his mother could get on with her life, and he could get the money he needed to make a new start far away from the likes of Jimmy Costard. It was all clear in his mind and he approached the practical details with a clear conscience.
Having taken care of salving his worries about the morality of what he intended doing, the rest was relatively easy. He was left only with the mechanics of how to do the deed. When he had visited his sister in hospital he had watched and been mesmerized by the steady pulsations of the respirator which kept her alive. He had seen how the power could be easily turned off. The only problem was to get into her room, do his duty for the family, and escape without being seen. His solution revolved around using a simple disguise and selecting a time when there would be the least people around. Tony was aware that during the change of shift there would usually be a period of controlled chaos which he could take advantage of. An easily obtainable white coat, glasses and a surgical mask would take care of the disguise. In fact Tony was growing so confident in his plan that he felt a disguise was hardly needed. He ran over the plan in his head. He could find no flaw. Once Emily's breathing had stopped, she would have only minutes before finding her peace. He would not wait for the end but walk briskly down the corridor, out into the night air and be gone unrecognised. Once Emily was dead, the hospital could be left to try and uncover what had happened; there would be nothing to connect the switching off of the respirator to himself.
Tony collected the things he needed for his disguise and packed them into a small canvas bag. Suzanne had spent the late afternoon with Emily and would not be returning to the hospital again until the next day. By now there was a twitch of nervousness at the prospect of what he had decided to do. Tony concluded that this evening would be the ideal time to complete the task. The sooner the deed was done, the better. Emily was in a small room alone and she should be receiving no visitors other than himself. He arrived at Biddenfield General carrying his bag. There was no need for him to feel nervous at the moment; he was just visiting his sister as he had done before. Despite this, his heart was racing as he entered Emily's room. There was no one else around and he took the opportunity to examine the corner closet where his sister's clothes were kept. This was where he would hide until the shift changeover which normally took place at ten o'clock. The small closet was adequate for Tony's purposes, if a little claustrophobic but if someone were to open the door when he was inside, it would take some quick thinking to explain himself. Tony placed his hopes on the reasonable view that no member of the hospital staff would need access to Emily's things during the night. It seemed a reasonable risk to take and he tried not to ponder the possible scenarios that might foil his plan as he sat by his sister and watched her. There was no sign of life from Emily, no flicker of her eyes, no twitch of her lips. He knew that he had made the right decision; it would bring the best outcome for everyone.
The time ticked slowly by. He glanced at the book on Emily's side table but found it of no interest to him; poetry was tedious and meaningless for him. Eventually the normal visiting hours were over and Tony slipped inside the cramped closet and waited. There was a single routine visit from a nurse who spent only a few seconds in the room and although Tony was uncomfortable waiting, he encountered no problems. As he heard the activity of a new shift coming on duty, he left his hiding place and quickly donned the hastily organized disguise. Turning off the respirator took only a second and Tony then marched briskly down the corridor towards the exit trying to appear like an official. The young, white coated man went unnoticed by the two or three people he passed. By the time he pushed through the swing doors and started to move to his car, an alarm in Emily's room had already started beeping. Without looking back Tony drove away down the quiet streets feeling a wave of relief wash over him. It had all gone according to plan with no problems at all. He stopped briefly at a roadside skip to discard the white coat and then drove home as if he had just been out for a quick drink.
Back at the cottage Emily had been waiting for Alexander to return from his evening walk. It was something he enjoyed, breathing the crisp air under the starlit sky. Emily was unable to accompany him, her cottage confined her but she never felt like prisoner, it was her universe and where she wanted to be. Without any warning Emily suddenly felt strange, she felt herself fading for an instant. Then, just as quickly she was back to normal. It made no sense to her, but that was not unexpected... few things in her world made much sense to her. In the hospital room Emily's respirator had automatically switched to battery mode and the alarm had been started to warn the medical staff of the problem. There was general confusion as to what had happened. There was clearly no fault in the machinery but the main power switch had been found turned off. The status quo was soon re-established and the situation was back under control. Emily had suffered no ill effects from the brief disruption but an inquiry would have to be held to try and discover what had happened.
Suzanne was still up watching the end of a slow moving television drama when Tony got back. She was sipping a cup of hot chocolate and Tony declined the offer to join her. He felt guilty, as if what he had done was tattooed on his forehead there for his mother to read. He found himself blushing as his mother looked at him and made his excuses and went to bed. Tony waited expectantly for the phone to ring. It should do so at any moment to tell his mother that Emily had finally gone. There was nothing before he heard Suzanne going to bed. He struggled to go to sleep but he felt just too wired to drift off. He stared at the reflected car headlights bouncing around his room and listened to the distant sounds of the night and the sound of gentle rain against the window. By two in the morning there had still been nothing. He finally fell to sleep no longer sure that he had been successful. At eight when Suzanne made her regular call to see if there had been any change in Emily's condition, Tony's fears were confirmed. Emily was still alive, her condition unchanged. He bit his lip in frustration, after the nervous energy he had wasted, nothing had been achieved. He realized that switching off Emily's life support was not as easy as he had expected. He was back to square one, do not pass go, do not collect 200 dollars... Do not collect a cottage.
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