by F. C. Clark
‘Hmm, I just thought I would ask. As I said, you need to speak to Matthew – he may be able to help. But I agree, this isn’t coincidental. I will continue to dig around for you, but really there’s not an awful lot to go on.’
‘I guess not.’
‘It would seem your gut instinct was spot on.’
‘This doesn’t look good.’
‘No I agree.’
I take his hand. ‘I really appreciate your help… If there’s anything you ever need just ask. But not for sexual favours!’
‘What a shame.’ He retrieves his wallet and passes me a business card. ‘Take this, in case you need it.’
I lean towards him and plant a kiss on his cheek. ‘Thanks, Charles.’
‘You’re welcome. I’ll leave you to find Luke. By the way, fucking awesome dress, but you already know that.’ His eyes almost smile. Charles, the brash individual, seems almost self-effacing!
He disappears into the crowds, leaving me to think. My hands tremble as I place the business card and paper in my clutch bag. This is madness!
‘You look lost.’
I recognise the voice and turn. ‘Bradley, you scrub up well.’
‘Thanks, I guess! That was a compliment, right?’
‘It was – you look dashing this evening.’
‘Dashing? That’s a new one. And you look – well, what I want to say and what I am allowed to say.’ He whistles. ‘My boss is a very lucky man. Speaking of Luke, where is he?’
‘You’re the second person to ask me. He’s gone AWOL. Actually let’s mingle – you can help me find him.’
‘My pleasure.’ He holds his hand out. I look at it. Am I reading too much into it? He looks over his shoulder at me and winks. ‘Remember, I don’t bite.’ I place my hand in his and he holds it firmly. ‘Unless you want me to?’
I tap his shoulder. ‘Move, pest.’
Bradley manoeuvres his way through the masses of people. ‘I see him.’ He says into my ear. We move towards Luke and stop. My eyes fix on Luke – talking to Alexis! Actually, he’s smiling. What the hell is he doing? But then I see Alexis lean in to kiss Luke.
‘Kate, are you OK?’ Bradley asks me.
I move to Alexis. ‘What the fuck is going on?’ My voice is louder than I expected. Some people turn and stare.
‘Kate – Kate, look at me,’ Luke says, but I can’t look at him. My eyes fix on Alexis. Deliberately, my hand rises, and I give her the most powerful slap I can muster. Given the state of my temper, this almost knocks her flying.
‘Jesus, Kate!’
Luke’s voice echoes in my ears. ‘What? Don’t Jesus me.’
He helps Alexis regain her balance. Note to self, I must slap harder when Alexis is the fucking target.
‘Are you kidding me? Why would you help her?’ My hands fist on my hips. ‘This is unbelievable. You know what? You’re welcome to each other.’
I turn and storm away.
I easily lose myself among the sea of bodies. The sound of Luke’s voice grows fainter until I can no longer hear anything except people chatting. I find the lift we used earlier. Thankfully, the attendant holds the door for me before it closes. The lift begins to rise. I want to crumble to the floor, but grimly I hold onto the small amount of sanity I can muster and close my eyes, holding back my tears.
The sound of the lift door opening brings me back to reality. Seconds later, I come face to face with the door to our suite.
‘Fuck!’ I mutter. I don’t have a bloody key card. There’s no point searching my bag; Luke never gave me one.
My back makes contact with the wall, and I slide down to the floor. I’m mortified at how the evening has played out, cross that I don’t have a bloody key, and furious with Alexis. She kissed Luke!
I hear the lift. I raise my head to see a very cross Luke marching towards me.
I pull myself to standing. Can I face a battle tonight? If Alexis is the driving force, bet your arse I can.
‘I called after you.’ His dark eyes blaze.
‘Can you open the door… please.’ My politeness is cutting.
He finally opens the door.
I move past him into the room.
‘Are you enjoying yourself, Luke? I guess that was a bonus tonight.’ I start to pace, needing to get rid of my pent-up energy.
‘Do not fucking go there! You know she kissed me.’
‘Whatever! It makes no difference.’
‘What is that supposed to mean?’
‘She wants you, and always has.’
‘She was apologising for Philip’s behaviour.’
‘Yeah, of course she was. There is no “get out of jail” card for him, Luke; he scares the crap out of me.’
‘I never said there was. No one fucking touches you. I know you don’t like Alexis, bu—’
‘You’re not bloody wrong. Let’s add kissing my fiancé to the growing list of reasons I don’t like her.’
‘She was drunk. I have known her for years. Yes, she is confident and brash.’
‘How about rude and obnoxious? Let me think what else I can add.’
‘But you can’t hit people when you feel like it! We had this discussion only a week ago.’ He moves away from the door and heads towards the drinks cabinet.
‘May I remind you that you taught me how to hit people?’
He turns to face me. ‘In self-defence, Kate, not to attack innocent people.’
‘Innocent? Are you shitting me? She’s one of the nastiest people I’ve ever met – along with her slimeball dad.’
His eyes scan me. ‘I just told you I will deal with him. I know she’s direct and tough.’
‘You mean a bitch.’
His eyes dance with mine.
‘She has been awful to me, Luke.’
‘She was fairly remorseful.’
‘Remorseful, my arse.’ I stop and stare in disbelief. ‘Have you forgiven her? Please don’t tell me you’ve patched things up.’
‘Kate, this is not a fucking playground. I merely listened to her.’
‘I’m surprised you heard her with her tongue down your fucking throat.’
He downs his brandy and flashes me his dark eyes.
‘Enough of this shit. I need to be able to work with her when I take over your shares.’
‘How fucking peachy for you both.’ I walk away. ‘You’re welcome to her, but I wouldn’t tell your brothers.’ With no filter, words leave my lips to wound him. Shit!
‘What did you say?’ Luke walks towards me.
‘Nothing.’ Poker-face Harper is hopefully with me.
‘Nothing? No, you said not to tell Declan and Ollie. Why is that?’
I fold my arms. ‘I know they don’t like her.’ I swallow hard, hoping that my words are enough to stall Luke.
Luke takes my arm and turns me to face him. ‘Don’t bullshit me, Kate.’
‘I’m not.’
‘OK.’ He retrieves his mobile from his pocket.
‘What are you doing?’ Panic sets in; I know he’s playing me.
‘Calling Declan. I know you’re lying, so either you tell me or he will.’
Fuck, fuck, fuck. My stupid mouth has landed me in a situation that is going to erupt like a bloody volcano.
I grab his phone from his hand. ‘Fine.’
‘I’m waiting.’ He towers over me.
I take a deep breath and pray that Ollie will want to remain my friend after this.
My head lowers. ‘Ollie slept with Alexis.’
Luke lifts my chin. ‘Stop mumbling.’
‘I’m not.’ I said it. Do I have to repeat it?
‘Kate, I am fucking warning you.’
‘Ollie slept with Alexis. Well, Alexis took advantage of Ollie a long time ago.’
&
nbsp; ‘I don’t understand.’
‘Declan told me that Alexis tried it on with him, but he wasn’t interested. Ultimately she wanted you – there’s a fucking surprise – so she had Ollie instead. She took his virginity. It was just before—’ My mouth freezes.
‘His attempted suicide.’
I nod. ‘Declan said that Ollie found out she’d done it for a dare or a joke, then losing his friend and the bullying… It tipped him over the edge. That’s why Declan has no time for Alexis, he blames her for some of what happened.’
Luke’s face drains of colour, and his eyes become strangely dark.
‘Move.’
‘What?’ Holy fuck, he is going to find Alexis. ‘No.’ My back hits the door. Crap, I need to keep him here. God only knows what he will do.
‘Move!’
‘Let’s talk about it… Ollie is OK with what happened; he told me himself.’
‘This just keeps getting better. Am I the only one still in the dark?’
I shake my head. ‘Your parents don’t know. Ollie wanted to tell you, but he knew you would go mad.’
He points his finger in my face. ‘How could you keep this from me? You know how I feel about Ollie. This is low, even for you.’ He shakes his head. ‘It makes me wonder why I asked you to marry me. Where’s your honesty? Move away from the fucking door, or I will move you.’
‘No. I don’t trust you… I know you wouldn’t hurt Alexis, but—’
I raise my hand to his face. He takes my wrist. I do the same with the other hand. He now has both my wrists.
‘Luke, I’m sorry. I should have told you. But I promised Ollie, and he wanted to tell you himself.’
‘How can I trust you?’ His voice pierces my heart.
‘This isn’t my fault. Declan asked me not say anything, and it wasn’t my secret to tell.’
‘Bullshit.’ He releases my hands.
‘Luke please, stay here… Please.’
‘I’m so angry with you. Do you understand? This is more than keeping your word. I have to deal with Alexis… Christ, Kate, I can’t look at you.’
‘Fine, hate me. But don’t go and find her. You need to speak to Ollie – you owe him that much.’
‘Don’t fucking stand there and tell me what to do.’
‘I’m not. You just need to calm down.’
‘Fucking calm down? You’ve got a nerve after your performance tonight… such ladylike behaviour at a fucking function.’
‘Are you kidding me? Do you know what, Luke, I’m sick to death with your holier-than-thou bullshit. I forgot just how perfect you are.’
His eyes glint with a dark rage. I move away from the door. ‘Go. As I repulse you so much, I would hate for you to stay.’
I move away and head towards the bar, desperate for a drink.
‘Stop being so fucking dramatic.’
‘Dramatic? Oh my God, you make me so mad. Go on, go and do whatever it is you so desperately need to do. I’m sure Alexis will oblige you, now you know she wants to fuck all the Sutton boys.’
He moves towards me. ‘As ever, you stoop low to get a reaction from me.’
‘Low, that wasn’t low? This is low.’ I remove my engagement ring and place it on the desk. ‘I’ve had enough.’
As I walk away, Luke grabs my arm and pulls me towards him.
‘If you remove that ring, you remove me from your life… Think very carefully about it.’
‘Luke, you can’t treat me like this. I’m not perfect, but neither are you. Do what you bloody want – I’ve had enough.’
‘Is this what you want?’
‘You think everything is my fault. Your brother got seduced by the super-bitch while you were off saving the world, but, hey, of course it’s my fault. Even though I didn’t bloody know you then! What do you want me to say?’
‘You make me so fucking mad.’ His face reflects his words: deep-set lines score across his forehead and his features are hard.
‘Tell me something I don’t know. Just fuck me hard and let’s get this over with.’
My hand reaches for his groin. As I thought, he’s hard. Giving me no time to think, his lips are on mine. Reluctantly, I return his kiss. His body seems to have been taken over by another force: he needs to eradicate his anger and I’m the tool for him to use. I am probably the only person who knows how he works. Even though I could say no, I know what he needs.
He turns me to face the desk. My body folds forward as his hand slides up my thigh and snatches at my knickers.
My body yearns for his touch, and I think it always will, but my mind is full of anguish. One thrust and he enters me, full and hard. He remains stationary, allowing my body time to accept him, but no amount of time will relax me tonight. My eyes close as tears begin to roll down my cheeks.
The spaghetti straps keeping my dress together are not strong enough to withstand Luke’s manhandling. They break, exposing my breasts. Luke works hard to find his release. He is just thinking of himself; there is no satisfaction for me, no orgasm waiting. Each thrust feels harder, and as his breathing grows shallow I know his climax is almost with him. Two more thrusts, and then he stops. He lowers his face to my back.
‘Fuck! Kate, I didn’t… Jesus, what have I done?’ He pulls out of me. ‘Christ, you’re bleeding.’
‘My period is due; it wasn’t you.’ I wipe my tears and look down to see what was once a beautiful dress and is now pieces of ripped fabric.
Luke scoops me into his arms. I have no energy to argue, and rest my face in the crook of his neck as he carries me towards the bathroom. He lowers me and turns on the bath taps. Then he locks his strong arms around my shivering torso, while I continue to sob.
‘Forgive me, baby, please.’
‘For what?’
He places his hands on either side of my face. ‘The way I took you. I never meant to – Jesus, I’m sorry.’
His lips seal his words with a gentle kiss.
‘It was either me or someone else.’
His hands run through his hair. ‘I would never hurt you.’
I look away.
‘Kate.’
I meet his eyes. ‘You just did, Luke.’
‘Fuck.’ He face is consumed with fear. He pulls me close again and kisses the top of my head. ‘I need you more than you’ll ever understand… I can’t lose you.’
I nod against his chest.
‘I will never forgive myself for what I just did. Please believe me. Don’t walk away from me.’
‘I won’t.’ I lift my head to show him I’m telling the truth.
He briefly closes his eyes. ‘Christ, I have never fucked up something in my life so badly. Your ring, Kate, please put your ring back on.’
‘Luke, I can’t take much more.’
‘I would give up everything tomorrow, but I could never give up on you – on us.’
‘You said I wasn’t who you thought I was,’ I say, sniffling through the last of my tears.
‘I can’t lie and tell you that keeping something like this from me doesn’t hurt.’
‘I told Ollie to speak to you! He’s going to hate me; it will crush him that you know.’
‘I’ll deal with Ollie, but not yet. I need to think this through.’
He slips the remains of my dress from my hips, and I stand before him, naked. He helps me into the warm water and turns the taps off.
My initial reaction is to draw my knees up to my chest. I feel physically and emotionally exposed. Luke disappears from the bathroom and returns with two glasses and my ring.
First he takes my hand and gently slides my ring to its rightful place.
‘Please, never remove this again – that’s all I ask of you. I know I don’t deserve it, but please, Kate.’
I nod.
He passes
me the glass. I down it. It does have some effect: a calming sensation washes through my core.
He lowers himself down and sweeps his hand against my cheek. ‘Can I join you, unless—’
I nod.
Luke strips and steps in the bath behind me. He pulls my back to his chest, encouraging me to uncurl from my foetal position. My head relaxes against his chest. I start to cry again. Will I ever stop? My tears fall to my cheeks and overflow onto Luke’s damp chest.
‘Shh, Kate, please…’
I cling to Luke as though my life depends on him. God I feel hurt. I turn slightly and see his anguish.
‘I’m sorry about Ollie.’
‘No more.’ His arms tighten around me.
‘Luke, I could have said no. I know how you work.’ I look at his face. ‘You needed me.’
‘I’ll never need you like that again… I attacked you; it wasn’t sex.’
I bolt upright, sloshing the water over the edge of the bath.
‘You didn’t attack me, never say that… I knew what you were doing.’
‘I did attack you. You can’t hide the truth, Kate.’ His chest rises and his eyes close, tormented by what he’s done.
‘You see red. I know what that means; I’ve seen it for myself.’ I link his fingers in mine.
‘That’s no excuse.’
‘I’m not saying it is.’
‘And the blood?’
‘I told you – my period is due, earlier than I thought. Luke, look at me. We’ve had rough sex before – sometimes rougher than tonight. I’m not lying; you didn’t hurt me.’
His hand slides across my breast and rests against my heart. ‘But here is where I hurt you, baby.’
22
In the middle of the night I bolt to the bathroom, clasping my hand over my mouth. The contents of my stomach make it to the toilet just in time.
‘Baby, are you OK?’ Luke joins me, gently touching my back.
I nod. ‘I am now.’ I stand and make my way to the sink, where I wash my face and brush my teeth. I look at him in the mirror, and then at my watch. It’s two o’clock in the morning.
‘Have you been working?’ I ask. I was alone when I woke.
‘Do you feel ill?’ He sidesteps my question.
‘No – it must be my period.’