by Hannah Gray
The nurse walks in and asks me if I have pain.
I nod. “I am pretty sore, and my head feels like someone stuck a knife in it.”
She nods and leaves the room. She comes back in a few minutes later with some medicine to help with the pain and discomfort.
“This will make you sleep, sweetheart. But that’s okay because you need your rest.”
She’s an older lady—in her sixties, I would say. She has short gray hair and is rather stout. I can tell she is a kind lady just by how attentive she is.
She nods at Trent. “This fella has been here all morning, lying in a chair that is way too small. I gotta get me one of them.” She motions to Trent and winks at me.
I laugh but then realize that it freaking hurts to laugh, so I try to control it. As I watch her walk out, I notice the clock above the door reads one in the afternoon. “Wow, I slept for a while, huh?”
Trent rubs his nose against mine. “You had a pretty eventful night. You need more rest than that.”
I suddenly realize my roommate is probably worried sick. I need to check in with her, so she knows I’m doing okay now. “Anna. I need to call Anna—”
He interrupts me, “I have been texting her. She wanted to come in, but I wanted to wait until you were up to it. I know you’re exhausted, so it’s your call. I have been keeping her updated though.”
I lean against him and feel the pain meds rushing into my body. Every muscle begins to relax, and the screaming pain in my abdomen fades away. I feel myself begin to drift off.
“Maybe just text her and say, I need a … a”—it gets harder to talk—“nap.”
twenty-three
Trent
Other than going to practices and classes, I don’t leave the hospital for the next five days. I hate to leave her at all, but she insists on it. Red comes during those times, which makes me feel better. I know Alex is dead now and can no longer hurt Cam physically, but the thought of her being alone fucking guts me. She’s been through more than any twenty-one-year-old should ever have to go through.
It’s Tuesday morning. I’m just leaving our early practice and heading back to the hospital to pick her up and take her back to her dorm. Instead, I’m hoping I can convince her to come stay with me for a few weeks. But knowing how stuck in her own ways she is, I’m sure it won’t be an easy task.
Maybe Red could talk her into staying with me. I’m fairly certain that she’s been staying with Mason since this all went down. He’s pretty secretive about what they are or aren’t, but I can tell that she means something to him.
I pull into the hospital and park by the door. Cam texted that she would be all ready and by the front door. Red wheels her out in a wheelchair as I round the truck to open up the passenger door. Her golden-blonde hair is in some braid thing that goes down her whole left side. Even after being shot less than a week ago, she is still the most beautiful girl I have ever laid eyes on. She has on those tight black yoga pants that give me a perfect look at her soft curves. Even with her hoodie on, I can see a few bruises peeking out.
I pick her up in my arms as gently as I can and set her in the front seat. Then, I reach over and put her seat belt on. I lean my head down and press a kiss to her lips. Then, I back away before shutting the door.
Red comes over to her door. “Oh, look at the happy couple, showing public affection.” She points to her mouth and pretends to gag, but her laugh says she really isn’t annoyed. “Are you headed to the dorm or …” Red asks, clearly unsure of what the right thing for Cameran is right now.
Sunshine fiddles with the hair at the end of her braid. “Uh, yeah. You headed there?”
Red nods. “Yeah, I just need to run to the grocery store to stock us up with some goodies. Also, I am going to grab your prescription for your antibiotics and your medication in case the pain gets to be too much. I know you said no more pain meds, but I just don’t want the pain to get so bad that it’s too much. I’ll also bring home Chinese food for us. We deserve it.”
She offers Red a smile. “Okay, great. Thanks. I guess I’ll see you in a bit at the dorms.”
Red shuts the door, and we pull out of the parking lot.
I can tell she’s uneasy about something. My gut tells me she is probably scared to be back at the dorm after what happened.
I clear my throat, looking at her hand resting where she was shot. “You feeling okay, beautiful?”
“Yeah, I am. Thanks for doing this. And for everything. Really, it means a lot to me.”
I reach over to hold her hand. “You’re welcome. You know if you don’t feel comfortable with going back to the dorms yet, you can stay with me.”
She doesn’t answer for a few moments, and then she says softly, “Oh no, I couldn’t impose like that. I’ll be fine. Besides, I have Anna.”
I rub my thumb against her knuckles. “All right, as long as you’re sure, but I’d feel better if you just came to stay with me. Besides, my bed looks better when you’re in it.”
I throw her a wink. She blushes. Just like every time I flirt with her.
“You have to promise me if you get nervous or scared at all, you’ll call me. I don’t care what time it is.”
She nods and looks out the window. Little by little, I feel her pulling away from me.
“Trent?” Her voice is almost a whisper.
“Yeah, Sunshine?”
“I’m sorry about your mom.”
She must remember what I said to her while we were waiting for the ambulance. She already knew my mom had died when I was younger. But when I was trying to keep her awake, I definitely opened up more. Desperately trying to get her to understand how much I couldn’t take losing her. But she hasn’t brought up the rest of it, so maybe she is scared of what I said. Maybe I took it too far.
“Thanks. It sucks, but that’s life, right? Just glad you’re okay.”
She nods and gives my hand a slight squeeze.
“I meant what I said, Cameran. It’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it or if it’s too much for you. But I meant it. Not just because you were dying or because you got shot. I said it because I finally understood it myself. Seeing you almost die, I guess my mind caught up to my heart, and I finally processed it.”
She turns her face toward me and watches me for a moment. “It seems crazy though, right?” she says with questioning eyes.
I turn toward her and then back to the road. “That I love you?” I shrug. “Maybe. Or maybe this is just how our story is supposed to happen.”
My truck rumbles to a stop at a red light. I glance over and watch her as she chews her bottom lip. Instantly making my cock twitch.
She breaks my dirty thoughts by saying, “I just need a little time. To, you know, process everything that just happened.”
I gently pull my hand away with the excuse of needing to adjust the heat. It’s frustrating as hell. Just when I think I break down one wall, she puts up, like, ten more and then digs a fucking moat as well. I am trying to be patient because I know she’s been through so much, but fuck if it’s not getting hard. Other than my mother and grandmother, I’ve never told any female I loved them. Until her. And now, she’s running from it, like she always does.
We’re just pulling into her dorm when her sweet, soft voice breaks me from my thoughts. “You’re mad at me, aren’t you?” She looks down at her hands in her lap.
Once we pull into a spot, I turn my truck off and lean my head against the headrest. “I’m not mad, Sunshine. I promise. I don’t think I could ever be mad at you. I’m just frustrated; that’s all.” I close my eyes and run my hand over my head. Then, I turn toward her. “I’m sorry. I know you’ve been through a lot. Take all the time you need.”
She gives me a sad nod, and I take that as my cue that it’s time to get her into her dorm.
“Hang on, and I’ll help you to your room.”
I jump out, jog around to her side, and open her door. “I know you’re still sore. They said to take next we
ek off from classes and lay low. Let me carry you inside.”
She begins to protest, but I pick her up and wrap her arms around my neck.
I whisper against her ear, “Please, Sunshine. You won’t let me do anything else for you. Let me just help you get settled.”
She looks up at me and nods. Those big, sad gray-blue eyes.
“Okay,” she says softly.
I turn and carry her into her dorm and gently set her on her bed, adjusting the pillows so that she is sitting up. “I’m going to go grab your things. I’ll be right back.”
I jog back out to my truck and grab the duffel bag that Red brought to the hospital for her.
I knock before I push the door open. “Here’s your stuff, beautiful. You want me to put it away or anything?”
She shakes her head. “That’s okay. I’m sure Anna will help me.”
I nod. “Uh, yes, Red. I’m glad you have her. She’s a good friend. Do you want anything to eat or a drink before I go?” I nod to the TV. “I can put a movie on for you.”
She pulls her blanket up to her chin. “I think Anna is bringing home Chinese. But a movie would be awesome. You pick. Mine are to the left.”
I walk over to it, and my eyes roam over a wide variety of DVDs. She’s got romantic comedies like Fool’s Gold, How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, Failure to Launch. But then she has other ones like Legends of the Fall, Braveheart, The Patriot, Cast Away, Top Gun, and Days of Thunder. I pick up Top Gun.
She smiles. “You look surprised.”
“I am a little. Most girls haven’t even heard of movies like Legends of the Fall or Braveheart.”
She chews her bottom lip, sending signals right down my pants. Those fucking pouty lips. I wish I could be the one nibbling them.
“My dad loved those movies. I remember him always watching them before he and my mom died. I guess watching them makes me think of him in a good way. And all of those romantic comedies with Matthew McConaughey and Kate Hudson? Those were my mom’s favorites. She was a hopeless romantic.”
My smile falters for a split second. I guess because it makes me sad that maybe, at one point, Cameran was a romantic too. But now, she’s so afraid of everything. Afraid to feel. Sort of how I have been these past fourteen years.
“Which type of movie do you want to watch, Sunshine?”
She snuggles into her bed. “You pick.”
“Does that mean you want me to stay and watch it with you?”
She nods shyly. “Anna has to go to the store, the pharmacy, and also to a few of my classes to collect work for me. Plus, she’s picking up Chinese. So, she won’t be back for a while.”
I nod in understanding. She doesn’t want to be alone yet.
I kick off my shoes and try to fit next to her on her twin-size bed. My feet hang off the end, but I move her, so she’s tucked under my arm with her head resting on my chest. This bed is as uncomfortable as hell, but I’d lie here forever if she let me.
The movie that I chose starts, and she smiles at my choice and nuzzles her head against my chest.
“Couples Retreat? This is actually one of my all-time favorites.”
I chuckle. “Never heard of it, but I figured it looked like a ‘feel-good movie,’ as you ladies call them. Besides, anything with Vince Vaughn is okay with me.”
We get halfway through, and I glance down and see she’s fallen asleep. I watch her for a few moments. Not in a creepy way, but just taking in her beauty. Okay, who am I kidding? I’m probably being fucking weird. Her nose is the cutest nose I’ve ever seen. It’s so small, like a button. She’s got the sexiest mole right above her lip that makes her even more distinguished-looking. She’s got absolutely no makeup on, yet long, dark lashes fan over her eyes. She’s also got a handful of freckles sprinkled all over her nose and cheeks.
The door jiggles, and I’m pulled from, well, being a creeper, for lack of a better way to put it. Red walks in with her arms full of groceries and a bag slung over her shoulder, probably full of Cameran’s work. I want to jump up and help her, but I don’t want to risk waking Cam.
I talk as softly as I can, “Sorry, I’d offer a hand but …” I nod down at a sleeping Sunshine.
She smiles. “That’s okay. Just glad to see her resting. How’s she been?”
I look down at her as she sleeps. “She’s all right.”
She narrows her eyes and sits down at the chair at her desk.
“You asked her to stay with you, didn’t you?” she says in a questioning tone.
I chuckle lightly. “What makes you think that?”
She shrugs. “Just a guess. So, I take it, she said no.”
“Gee, what gave it away?” I motion toward Cameran sleeping.
She rolls her eyes. “Don’t be a sarcastic jackass.”
I sigh. “What about you? You’ve been shacking up with Mase while she’s been in the hospital, haven’t you?”
She gets a serious look on her face and shakes her head. She whispers, “I don’t know. Seeing it all happen, it shook me … you know? I can’t even imagine how she feels. But she won’t talk to me about it. For Christ’s sake, I didn’t even know what she was going through. But you and Mase did.”
She looks down, and it’s clear to see that she is still shaken up over this. But I can tell she is also hurt that she was the last to know.
“Look, I tried to get her to stay with me. Even with him dead, I just want her with me.”
She smiles. “I heard what you told her, you know. Just hang in there.”
I’m about to ask her what she means when I feel Cameran begin to stir, and then her eyes flutter open.
“Oh, man, I missed the movie. Why’d you let me sleep?”
I kiss the top of her head. “Because you needed sleep. You’d better eat with Red here. She brought you Chinese, and you barely ate in the hospital.”
I stand up and put my shoes on. “If you change your mind, call me. My offer stands.” I lean down and kiss the top of her head before heading out.
We have two practices tomorrow to get ready for the game on Saturday. It’s a big one against one of our rival schools. So, even though I need to be well rested, I know damn well that sleep won’t come easy.
twenty-four
Cameran
Anna and I have a good dinner. We go through all of the schoolwork my teachers gave her. We watch another movie, though this time, we choose Step Up with Jenna Dewan and Channing Tatum because, come on, who can go wrong with Channing Tatum?
After the movie ends, Anna stretches her arms over her head and looks at the time on her phone. “It’s only eight thirty at night, and yet I feel like it’s midnight. Damn, I’m getting to be an old bitch.”
I laugh as lightly as I can, and even then, pain sears through my stomach.
She sits up straight in bed. “I’m so sorry, Cam! I didn’t mean to make you laugh. But that does remind me; it’s time for your medicine.” She jumps up and hands me one prescription-strength ibuprofen and an antibiotic along with a glass of water.
“Thanks.” I gulp them down with the water and hand the empty glass back to her. “I’m really glad to have you. Thanks for this.” I motion between us. “Really. It’s been a long time since I had a friend like you. I don’t think I could get through this without you.”
She sits back down and faces me. “I’m so sorry for everything you have gone through. I know I don’t know what your past was with that monster, but I can’t even imagine how awful it all was.” She looks down at her hands in her lap and picks at her fingernail polish. Then, she glances back up at me and wipes a tear away with her sleeve. “I just wish you had talked to me about it. I get that we have only known each other a few months, and maybe you don’t feel that close to me, but, Cameran, I consider you to be my best friend. When we met, we just clicked. I have a few childhood friends back at my hometown and some girls I have shared classes with that I occasionally grab lunch or coffee with around campus, but you are my best friend. I tell you
that so much. I want to be your best friend too.”
I wipe my own tears away now. “I’m sorry, Anna. I get embarrassed. Embarrassed because of what I endured. Embarrassed for what I put up with. Embarrassed because I don’t feel worthy of anything or anyone. I just couldn’t bring myself to talk to you about it. You’re so shiny and fun and optimistic. I’m a train wreck. I know it seems like I told Trent and not you because we’re closer, but that isn’t it. He just always seemed to be there at the weird hours of the night when I was getting the calls from who I presume was Alex. Trent called me out on it, and I told him. I guess I told him because I felt like he has a lot of dark in him too. I know he’s been through some shit even though he keeps it inside. I hadn’t planned to tell him; it just kind of came out.”
She rushes over and climbs next to me. She runs her hand over my hair. Usually, this type of affection would send me into an anxiety attack. But for some reason, with her or Trent, it’s calming. It’s something my mom always did when I was upset.
“Whenever you want to talk, you can tell me everything and anything. I will never judge you for it, I promise. And I also promise you that I’m not half as bright and shiny as everyone thinks. I’ve got my own demons I fight on a regular basis. And one day, I’ll tell you all about them.”
I nod and wipe my eyes, and then I tell her everything. About the abuse, the baby, escaping, and all the details about that night when Alex came back to get me.
We were both physically and emotionally wrecked after all of the talking and crying. Making us doze off to sleep around ten.
I’m in a deep sleep when a loud banging on the door pounds in my ears. My eyes shoot open, and I realize getting up is going to be a challenge with this fresh wound. Let’s be real; I had to have Anna help me use the damn bathroom earlier, so escaping whoever this is might be a doomed task.