“You’ve said your relationships aren’t just for pleasure, and that there’s no place for me in your bed, and I can accept that. But should either of those things ever change, know that I’m willing to try and find my place with you.”
“I can’t promise you anything, Saibra,” I returned her candor. “If I’ve learned anything at all, it’s that very little of my life is under my own control. Fate has determined more for me than I have; I’ve had little choice in nearly all of it.”
“Fair enough,” she smiled at me somewhat strangely. “We’ll leave it to fate then.”
After our conversation, I was more aware of how I acted around Venna, Líann, and Ella. I would often catch myself looking at one of them fondly, and if Saibra was present, I would cast a glance her way as soon as I did. She would simply shake her head at me in response, letting me know that she’d caught me once again. But then sometimes, with increasing frequently, when we’d leave a meeting where one of them was present, Saibra would let me know that I’d managed to completely conceal my feelings.
My uncomfortable conversation with Saibra was a somewhat mixed bag. She had managed to uncover my secrets, just as Thelmé had, but was willing to keep the matter private for me. Her other… disclosure was a bit more disconcerting. Saibra seemed to be content to stay near me, to bide her time as Líann had once told me she would. But unlike Líann, Saibra never pushed or tried to force the issue. She simply did her job and protected me as she always had, and I was grateful for that. In spite of her past life, Saibra was a pretty woman, with steely blue eyes and dark blond hair that was somewhat uncommon among elves, and a lean, hard body that came from years of dedication to her craft. Were I even slightly open to tempt fate, I probably would have taken her up on her offer. Unfortunately, my plate was rather full, and I knew better than to take on any more, so I let things lie and moved on as if we’d never had the awkward discussion.
The only other development of note during that otherwise calm period was my relationship with Líann. We’d started off on a rather strong note, and things only got more intense from there.
Líann’s need to have me display my power over her was like a fire that seemed to only grow hotter as we continued to feed it. She constantly pushed me, and provoked the darkness inside me, driving me to explore the increasingly dark shadows inside me. I have to admit that some of the things I did to her were unsettling to me at first, but I could feel her craving every bit of my shadows. I knew deep inside that she needed me to act on my dark impulses, and that in doing so, I was reducing the power that they held over me. Letting my shadows run wild set me free from them, ensuring that they could not take hold of me without my consent. Over time, Líann became my own dark mirror, letting me see into the shadowy pit of my soul; gaining control over my darkness as I did. And I loved her deeply for it.
Once we’d secured our alliances with the other Realms to the east of the Imperial District, I turned my attention to the horse lands north of Ashton.
The two Kingdoms of Hygan and Zonnia were nearly alone among the Realms in their overwhelming reliance on their cavalry. Although there was a wall of mountains on their western borders and slow, rolling hills to the south, their lands had a great deal of open plains, and they used this to their advantage. Both bandits and raiders from the Dark Lands fell beneath the trampling hooves of their massive warhorses.
That cavalry would be an invaluable addition to the Imperial Army, so I sent an Ambassador to each of the Kingdoms to establish relations and offer them a place in my Empire. I hoped they would see the wisdom in joining my fight against the Dark Lands, but those hopes were tragically misplaced.
My Ambassadors came back more than empty-handed. In an act of utter barbarism, the Kings of the horse lands returned the heads of the two men I’d sent to them in feed bags, a gesture that I was told meant that their bodies had been left in the wilds for the animals to pick over. In addition to the desecration, the Kingdoms sent a copy of the alliance they’d formed, practically daring us to respond to the outrage they’d committed against my Empire. It was a challenge that I could not ignore.
I’d been called to the Garrison to receive the ’message’ they’d sent, and as soon as I saw what they’d done and read the thinly veiled threat of their alliance, I turned to Evans who was standing by my side and gave him one simple order before I headed back to the Palace.
“Mobilize my Army, First Marshal. It will be going off to war, and I intend to lead it.”
Word of my intentions spread like wildfire, and people and messages flooded into Talína and my other aides’ offices in response. While they dealt with it all, I hid myself away in my own chambers and considered the war I was about to embark on.
Death and slaughter—I was about to kill a great number of people who should be fighting beside me, not against my Empire. It troubled me greatly that things had come to this. While it wasn’t realistic to assume that everyone would simply yield to me, the depraved manner in which the two Kingdoms had responded to a simple diplomatic overture was disturbing, and I simply could not let it stand.
As I pondered things, the door to my room opened, as I knew that it inevitably would. The only thing I’d wondered was who would be the first to visit me after I’d effectively declared war. Only a handful could make it past the guards outside, but I was shocked to see that it was none of the ones I expected that stepped inside my chambers.
“You may think to show restraint in an effort to spare lives, but this will only give your enemy hope and prolong things,” Saibra spoke to me plainly just a few steps away from where I sat. “If you truly care about saving lives, you must crush them—show them no mercy and hold back nothing when you attack. Only once they know that they cannot withstand your fury will they surrender and end this conflict.”
“At what cost?” Was my simple reply.
“That is not up to you,” she responded flatly. “It is up to them. All you can do is make them pay the price they require to submit.”
With that last comment, she inclined her head slightly and departed. Saibra was often like that—abrupt, to the point, and then gone. It was an odd quality, but I’d gotten used to it and her other eccentricities over the last few months. And as I considered her advice, I could find little fault with what she’d said.
I considered things a bit longer, and when Tási strode in a short while later, I held up my hand to forestall her before she had a chance to speak.
“I’m not going to do this one by one,” I told her. “Please call the entire council together, and we’ll discuss the matter thoroughly.”
“Easy enough,” she smirked back at me. “They’re waiting for you in our usual meeting room. You’d know that already if you’d given me a chance to speak.”
“Sorry,” I apologized somewhat meekly. “I appreciate how well you anticipated my needs.”
“Yeah… well… that wasn’t me,” she reluctantly admitted.
That wasn’t really surprising. Even though she was still young for an elf, Líann had already been Queen for over a century. She’d more than likely seen her share of conflict and perhaps even war during that time. I should have known that for certain, but the subject of war had yet to come up during any of the regular council meetings, and the weekly ‘talks’ I had with Líann involved very little actual conversation.
“Believe it or not,” I replied to Tási. “The two of you are on the same side.”
“I know that,” she smiled back at me with a mischievous twinkle in her eye. “But that doesn’t mean I have to like the perfect little elven… Queen.”
“I swear, the two of you are like children sometimes,” I sighed as I started towards the door.
“Wait, you mean she’s jeal… she doesn’t like me either?” Tási replied with disbelief.
“We’re about to go to war, Tási, and you’re worried about this?”
“Sorry, let’s go,” Tási deflated as I glared at her.
Just before we stepp
ed out of my rooms and into the antechamber where we were immediately surrounded by a double detail of my guards, I whispered into Tási’s ear.
“Yes, she’s jealous of you too.”
Tási almost missed a step, and despite the grave mood, I couldn’t help but smile as she caught herself. The two of them were almost complete opposites, and the less-than-subtle jabs they constantly threw at each other when they were with me were becoming more and more irritating.
Saibra and Karina led me through the crowd that had gathered in the room I’d come to simply refer to as ‘Talína’s offices.’ She’d taken a firm hold over all my affairs and my other aides as well, turning the running of my Empire into an incredibly smooth operation over the last several months.
“No more, Tási,” I said to her, using the din of the packed area to mask my words. “You don’t have to like her. You can hate Líann for all I care, but I don’t want to hear about it anymore. I wish the two of you could get along. Despite your differences, you have a great deal in common in some ways. But I guess that sort of tranquility isn’t in the cards for me.”
“I’ll try,” Tási replied, obviously reining in her objections.
I knew how difficult holding back her long-standing resentment was going to be for her, so I respected her honesty, both spoken and unspoken.
I followed along as my guards led the way down to the spacious room we used for our regular council meetings. Líann and all of my Ministers were already in their usual places so once Tási and I had taken our seats, I began the discussion.
“We are going to war,” I stated firmly. “This discussion is about how we wage that war, and nothing else. I intend to utterly destroy those who committed the atrocities against the representatives of my Empire and set a stark example to dissuade anyone tempted to commit a similar act of barbarity in the future. Now that I’ve made myself clear, how do we make this happen?”
“The horse Kingdoms cannot match our numbers,” Evans began bluntly. “But they don’t fight the same way that we do. They will harass us, make fast strikes, and then retreat before we can counter-attack. They rely on their speed for both offense and defense, and we cannot match them in that. I can defeat them, but it will be a long and costly affair.”
“What your First Marshal says is quite true, but we need not rely on force of arms alone, Empress,” Líann added thoughtfully. “The military might of the horse lands is composed almost entirely of their nobility. As you can easily imagine, maintaining heavy cavalry is quite an expensive endeavor. The cost of arms and armor, not to mention the warhorses themselves, is nearly prohibitive. The horse lands overcome this by requiring the soldiers themselves to pay for the majority of the costs involved, limiting military careers to the nobility and the very wealthy.”
“While this requirement has given them a rather unique and potent military force, it has also had the side effect of creating a deep schism in their societies. Military service is looked upon as a tremendous symbol of status, and those whose families cannot afford to sponsor one of their members into it are viewed with disdain, treated rather poorly, and frequently abused by the upper classes.”
“Therefore, I propose that we begin our efforts not with a military strike, but a propaganda campaign instead,” Líann continued, offering her strategy. “Send in scouts and others able to blend in among the population. Let them spread the word of what you offer. Post the Imperial Charter and other messages of the unity and acceptance you intend to grant them. Sow as much discord and dissention as you can before we even get there. The lords of the horse lands may view the common folk as less than themselves, but they will learn a hard lesson if we can force them to try and get by without their inferiors.”
Líann’s sarcastic emphasis on her final word let me know without a doubt just how she felt about the issue. While she’d been haughty and arrogant, the Queen had a reputation for treating her people well, obviously understanding the critical role they played in her Realm. An understanding she’d seemed quite capable of applying to them as a group, but one she lost focus on when dealing with them as individuals. It was an odd disconnect, but one she’d since overcome.
But Líann’s strategy was both subtle and sound and reflected the decades of experience she’d had leading her Realm, and I was reminded, not for the first time, just how fortunate I was to have her counsel. Her insight and expertise had been invaluable during our meetings with my Cabinet, and she’d never failed to offer at least one useful bit of knowledge on each of those occasions. I reminded myself to reward her appropriately… later.
“That sounds like a good plan to me,” I responded when Líann finished. “Unless anyone has something else to add?”
“No,” Venna replied. “Líann’s idea is a good one. Hopefully, they can be weakened enough before we even arrive to make things less bloody than they would otherwise be.”
When no one else was able to offer any additional strategies, I turned back to Evans.
“How long do you need to prepare my Army?”
“A week should do it, Empress,” he replied after just a short moment to consider my question.
“Líann, I want you to work with Talína to draft some messages we can post in addition to the Charter,” I told her next. “I will send her down to your suite immediately so that the two of you can work undisturbed. When you’re done, have the scribes make copies and then forward the finished work to Khorim. The Minister of Intelligence can send out the appropriate people for the job of slipping into Hygan and Zonnia to distribute our messages.”
“But those scouts are to leave no later than tomorrow,” I concluded. “I want them to have the time they need to cause as much turmoil as possible before we arrive.”
“I have just the right ones in mind,” Khorim offered with an almost devilish grin.
“I will see to it, Empress,” Líann replied as she rose from her seat.
Evans simply offered me a nod as he also stood up, and our meeting came to a quick end. As soon as our discussion was over, and our plans for war were set in motion, the soft sound of a notification rang in my ears. Rather than read it just then, I decided to wait until I was alone in my chambers to see what the message revealed to me. While I’d been musing, the others had filed out, leaving only me and my guards in the room, and I approached Saibra to ask her opinion on what she’d heard.
“It is a good plan,” she actually responded with a rare smile. “It employs subterfuge, undermining your enemy first, followed by a potentially devastating military strike. If you can hit them hard enough with your first blow, it might very well end everything.”
“But if I may,” she continued. “The task of infiltrating the horse lands is something I’m uniquely suited for. You may wish to consider sending me as well.”
“No, absolutely not,” I replied firmly. “After what they did to our Ambassadors, I’m certain that these people are capable of almost anything. I want you with me, in case they send assassins against us.”
“That is most insightful of you,” Saibra replied. “I will remain beside you, as you command.”
As we left the room, I recognized one of Saibra’s little quirks in the last words she’d spoken to me. Ever since the discussion we’d had when Saibra had told me that she’d picked out my lovers, I’d been more attuned to the subtle acts and gestures that had given things away to her. And just then, Saibra herself had made one of those tell-tale mistakes. Likely on purpose, just to see if I’d notice. The last words she’d spoken were ‘as you command,’ but what she’d actually said was, ‘right where I want to be.’
She knew I had no place for her and had accepted that fact, but only for the time being. As an elf, and a relatively young one at that, Saibra knew, as Líann had once told me quite bluntly, that she would likely outlive both Ella and Tási, and although she said nothing, Saibra seemed perfectly content to wait patiently for the inevitable.
The thought should have been disturbing to me, and on some levels it
was, but there was also a certain comfort in it as well. I truly and deeply needed each of the four women that were in my life, and the loss of any of them would be devastating to me, far beyond what any normal person might experience.
But while I truly loved each of them on a personal level, I also had a desperate need for what they brought to me. The outlet they provided for my emotions was critical for my well-being, as I’d come to realize with increasing clarity. Nentai’s message in my notification had triggered latent memories in me that helped me to better understand just how important they were to me as a Sintári.
Each Sintári’s connection to the world was different, which lent us all our own unique strengths. Those connections came with a price, and in return, we all had our own specific vulnerabilities as well. Those vulnerabilities could only be addressed by bonding with another who could act as an emotional sink of sorts, absorbing our excess emotions, or allowing us to channel them accordingly. Not only were the exact vulnerabilities different from Sintári to Sintári, but the intensity of those vulnerabilities, for lack of a better term, varied as well. In my case, my passions and darkness were my most powerful emotions, and correspondingly, I needed to express them most urgently. In contrast, my need for Venna and Ella was much less strong. The need to express my gentler side with Venna or to be reminded of just where I came from with Ella was far less frequent.
This was the uncomfortable situation that Saibra, patiently waiting in the wings for me, presented. At some point in the future, in the wake of the loss of one of the women I loved with all my heart, I would likely need Saibra to step in and heal the gaping wound that would be left in my Sintári soul. I might very well feel compelled to commit what would otherwise be viewed as an act of utter betrayal and disrespect in order to maintain the delicate balance that my heightened emotional connections required. In ancient times, when the Sintári still walked this Earth in some numbers, this would not be looked upon with any sort of disdain. In fact, it was a quite common practice, and the need for it was readily understood. But those days were long ago, and even I was disturbed by where my Sintári nature led me at times.
Second Skin: Unified: A litRPG Adventure (Second Skin Book 3) Page 78