by Sharon Page
Silence stretched between them for a long moment. When Ulrich turned around, there were tears in his eyes. “If you could give me one night with the woman I’ve loved all these years, it would be a gift beyond treasure. If there is any way to give her peace …” His shoulders sagged, and Ulrich took a deep breath. “To give any of us peace, we need to do whatever it takes.”
Anton nodded slowly, as if weighing Ulrich’s words and his own reply very carefully. “The hardest thing, my friend, will not be going through the veil to your wife. The difficult part of the journey will be when you need to return. You must come back to us before dawn or stay forever on the other side.”
Ulrich’s shoulders slumped. “I understand. It’ll be like losing her again, only forever this time.”
Anton shook his head. “Not that long, really. Life on earth is short, by comparison. Eternity is …” Anton smiled at his own joke, “forever.” He held out his right hand for Ulrich to grasp. “You must promise me you’ll come back of your own free will, or I can’t attempt to send you across. From what I’ve seen of you, I trust you’re a man of your word.”
Ulrich hesitated but a moment, nodded, and took Anton’s hand in his. Luc realized he’d been holding his breath and let it out in a long, slow sigh. All this talk of death and veils and planes. None of it made sense. He watched Tia and Keisha, still talking, Tia with her hand on Keisha’s almost flat stomach, their faces animated, filled with laughter.
Now that made sense.
A shiver raced over his shoulders.
Luc felt as if a hand caressed his cheek; then the presence moved toward the house. He turned and glanced at Anton, saw the other man’s gaze follow something toward the front door. Anton turned back, his amber eyes locking on Luc’s with mesmerizing intensity.
Yes. She was here. You didn’t imagine it. Anton spun around and slapped Ulrich on the back. “Come inside,” he said, as though the ghost of Ulrich’s wife hadn’t just wandered across the deck. “Alexandria and Stefan have set out a late lunch for us. We can discuss what comes next over a good meal.”
Sitting at the foot of the long table, Ulrich felt the separation between himself and the others in the room more intensely than ever before. Each of them was paired with a lover, just as he’d once been paired with Camille.
Damn her! Why did she have to take so many risks? Ulrich wondered if he’d ever get past the anger, the sense of helplessness over the loss of the one woman he’d ever loved.
Hadn’t her adventurous personality been part of her charm? Hadn’t he been drawn to the cocky attitude, the strength, the absolute mastery of the woman?
Yes. Ulrich sighed.
Would he ever be able to think of Camille without blaming her for all the years he’d spent alone?
Camille had missed so much. Ulrich caught Tia smiling at him and flashed her an answering grin. Who would have thought he could have had a part in creating such an amazing young woman? Bright, beautiful, headstrong like her mother but with her stubbornness tempered by just enough of Ulrich’s own common sense.
Damn her! Camille should have been there to help raise her daughter.
But if she had, would Tia have turned out as well? Would she have been something better? Ulrich couldn’t imagine anything about Tia that could be improved.
Then there was Luc. Like the son he’d never had, the son Camille might have given him, had she lived. Luc had ended Camille’s life and then done his best to atone for what he considered his most egregious sin. He’d more than atoned. He’d become indispensable, and, even more than that, loved.
Anton’s laughter caught Ulrich’s attention. The Montana alpha didn’t laugh all that much, but it was obvious that the child Keisha carried had softened the enigmatic wizard more than anything else could. Usually Stefan was the one laughing, making jokes, teasing his packmates.
The sense of love in the room was a palpable thing, alive and growing, excluding Ulrich by its obvious pairing. Anton and Keisha, Alexandria and Stefan, his own daughter Tia and the man by her side.
Ulrich sighed and closed his eyes against the sting of self-pity. He must be getting old, to feel so maudlin.
Not old, my love, merely lonely.
Camille?
It had to be her. Ulrich’s head snapped around, but of course there was nothing behind him.
Soon. We’ll be together soon.
He must be hearing things. The conversation ebbed and flowed around him, late afternoon sunlight streamed through the windows … and that couldn’t possibly be the voice of his long-dead wife.
Ulrich glanced up and caught Anton watching him. The small nod and half smile the wizard flashed his way made Ulrich shiver.
Anton pushed his chair back from his position at the head of the table and stood; then he lightly tapped his fork against his wineglass. The crystal rang like a small bell. Chatter and laughter among the others in the room came to an immediate halt.
“First I want to formally welcome our guests.” Anton nodded toward Tia and Luc, but his gaze rested on Ulrich. “I also want to explain exactly what I have in mind, as there’s a certain amount of preparation all of us need to do before tomorrow night.”
Keisha smiled up at her mate. Once more Ulrich was reminded of Camille. Was the similarity in appearance between the two women, the fact Keisha carried her first child, the reason for Camille’s reappearance?
“Halloween, or Samhain, is traditionally the time we honor our dead. It’s the one night of the year where the veil between the living and dead is at its most fragile, when the dead can more easily pass from the ethereal plane to our earthly one. Keisha and I have sensed Camille’s presence on this side, the side of the living, where she shouldn’t be, and it’s grown stronger each night. Tomorrow night, if everything works, I want to do two things. Find out what is holding Camille here, and, hopefully, give Ulrich the opportunity to find closure with his wife. I suspect that lack of closure is what’s holding her tied to the world of the living.”
Ulrich stared at Anton for a long moment, considering the wizard’s words. Anton had just accused him of hanging on to Camille’s spirit, of holding her back. The purpose of this whole visit suddenly made all too much sense. “I hadn’t thought of it like this, but, essentially, you’re asking me to condemn Camille, once more, to death.”
Anton shook his head. “No, my friend. She is already dead. I’m asking you to let her rest.”
Put that way … “What do I need to do?” Ulrich reached for his wineglass, realized his hand was shaking, and placed his palm flat on the table beside his plate.
“We all have to prepare. I’ll need the combined energy of everyone in this room to part the veil and hold it open long enough. My wife appears to be Camille’s focal point. Ulrich suggested it was Keisha’s appearance as much as the family relationship of aunt to niece; Luc thought it might be that plus the fact Keisha carries our child, reminding Camille of her own role as a mother.”
Tia’s head snapped up. She looked directly at Keisha, and her skin flushed a dark bronze. “I never thought of that. I’ve been feeling so jealous, wondering why my mother would come to you and not her own daughter. That makes so much sense. Keisha, I’m sorry.”
“For what?” Keisha reached across the table and grasped Tia’s outstretched hand in hers. “You have every right to be resentful. I hardly remember your mom…. Believe me, I’ve been feeling just as resentful, wishing it was my own mother popping into my head, not yours!”
“This is one of the things we need to clear from the room. Any suspicion, any sense of ill will.” Anton smiled at his wife. “Tomorrow night when we call Camille, we will all have purified ourselves as much as possible. I want you to consider at least an hour of quiet meditation, preferably somewhere alone, before we meet here tomorrow night at dusk. Clear your thoughts of all distractions, all anger, jealousy, all fear … and, while I know it’s asking a lot of this particular group, no sex from now until after we’re done.”
Stefan’s dramatic groan made even Ulrich chuckle.
Anton grinned. “Think of the energy you’ll add to this project, all that bottled testosterone struggling to escape. We need you, Stefan.”
Laughing, Stefan tossed a napkin at Anton, who caught it neatly in one hand as he continued. “We’ll all need to rest well tonight and tomorrow. We’ll eat well at midday and then fast until dusk, when I want you to meet me in the meadow behind the house. Once we establish a circle and make contact, we need to hold the link until Ulrich returns before dawn. If we lose it, we could lose Ulrich.”
He said it so matter-of-factly, Tia’s head spun in an arc as her gaze shot from Anton’s to Ulrich. Her father looked directly at her, shrugged his shoulders, and smiled. Don’t worry. It will all be fine. I’ll be okay.
Are you sure?
Ulrich nodded, keeping the connection between the two of them completely private.
His daughter blinked rapidly, her eyes sparkling with what could only be tears. Her hand came up and she brushed them away, the quick and angry motion of her fingers so much like Camille, Ulrich’s heart actually hurt. As he watched, Tia’s shoulders straightened, and she glared at him.
Well, you’d damned well better be careful, because if anything happens, I’m coming after you, and you’ll be sorry.
Ulrich’s burst of laughter caught everyone by surprise. Tia had just repeated the very threat he’d used on her when she was a child. He held up his hands in mock surrender.
“My daughter has just made a point of reminding me who the lead alpha in our pack is. She’s more like her mother than she realizes. You may all rest assured, should Anton be successful in sending me to the other side, I will be back on time.”
4
Freshly showered and shaved, wearing only the simple white robe Oliver had left in his room, Ulrich took one last look in the large mirrored closet door at the man who would attempt the impossible in a few short hours.
A candle flickered from a nearby table, the small flame barely visible in the late afternoon light. He’d thrown open the window shades to the perfect fall day, and sunlight spilled across the polished wood floors.
Was he ready? As Anton instructed, Ulrich planned to meditate for the next hour, find his center, and calm his racing heart before meeting with the others, but, now, looking at his reflection, Ulrich’s body shivered with surging emotions and the rush of adrenaline.
What would Camille think of him when he appeared to her?
He turned to one side, examining his reflection. Except for the white hair, he didn’t look or feel his age. No extra weight, his skin smooth and unlined, his eyes clear, their amber lights positively glowing tonight. Ulrich took a deep breath, sucked in his nonexistent belly, and then let it out with a sigh of self-disgust.
“Who the hell are you kidding, you old fart? You’re a fucking sixty-three-year-old hoping to spend the night with a woman who will forever be thirty-eight years of age.”
Ulrich sat heavily on the edge of the bed as the enormity of what they planned to attempt slammed into him. The years of anger, of need, of pure, unmitigated wanting, immobilized him and settled into an ache under his heart.
Dear God, how he missed her.
Anton had asked that each of them come to him with a clear mind and an open heart. Impossible. Nothing seemed clear … nothing at all. Not like this.
Ulrich slowly stood up, removed the white robe. He folded it neatly, set it on the bed, and shifted.
Only when he was the wolf could his body find peace.
Shaking off his human cares, the huge wolf that was the better part of Ulrich Mason paced the small area between the end of the bed and the wall and then settled down on his haunches to stare at the tiny flame. His thoughts might be that of the man, but the heart beating in his chest was that of the alpha wolf.
Tonight he would once again be reunited with his mate. He would think only of this night, not of the days beyond. Freeing his mind from worry, the wolf let peace steal his soul.
Tia sat cross-legged in the middle of the bed. She held in one hand a photo taken years ago of her mother and herself. It was an old color image from shortly before Camille’s death. Both of them were laughing, their eyes bright, their smiles carefree. Tia stared at the picture and tried to remember her mother’s scent, the way Camille’s arms felt wrapped around her waist, the feel of her mother’s lips against her cheek.
Tia knew all these things had happened, but the memories were lost. Staring at the photo, Tia realized all she really wanted were fresh memories, something to hold her mother close to her in all the years ahead.
Something to chase away the lingering resentment she’d never been able to shed, the feeling of abandonment when Camille had suddenly disappeared from six-year-old Tia’s life.
Could Anton give her that much? It seemed so little to ask, yet it would require much of the wizard’s skill.
Tia held the photo close to her heart. She opened her mind to possibilities, her heart to love.
Luc filled the space. Completely.
Smiling, Tia pushed thoughts of her mate aside and concentrated on the night ahead.
Keisha ran the brush through her hair, staring at the face of the woman in the mirror. She could be her Aunt Camille, so closely did they resemble one another. Was that the reason Camille had returned here, to Keisha’s home in Montana, rather than to Camille’s home in San Francisco?
Why now? Was it the baby she carried? Her hand protectively covered her flat stomach. Fearing for her child’s safety, Keisha almost had considered not joining the group tonight, but it was obvious Anton counted on her.
Keisha smiled. She would do anything for Anton Cheval. Anything at all. Even face the ghost of a woman who had been dead for more than twenty years.
Shaking her head at the absurdity of calling up the dead, Keisha set the hairbrush on her vanity table and moved to the comfortable old rocking chair Anton had found in the basement.
Freshly painted now, filled with soft pillows and an even softer lap blanket, it would be perfect for rocking their child.
What better place to meditate, to find peace, to clear her mind of any fears and misgivings she might feel?
Keisha knew she had already survived the worst life could throw at her. A meeting with the ghost of her dead aunt was nothing. So long as she had Anton beside her, Keisha could handle anything.
Bring it on. I’m ready.
Smiling, she tapped the floor with her toe and set the rocker into motion. Opening her heart, Keisha felt the peace of the day settle over her mind.
Stefan heard the shower go on in the guest room next to his and knew Xandi readied herself for this evening. He’d already showered and shaved earlier, donning the soft white robe Anton had given him.
He knew this evening was important, but, damn, he missed Xandi. Why in the hell they always ended up without sex when the San Francisco pack showed up, he wasn’t sure, but for some reason it seemed to happen that way.
It’s been only twice, you idiot.
Okay, so he could go a couple nights without Xandi’s sweet, responsive, and loving body in his arms, but, dammit, didn’t these people realize he had a lot of years of celibacy to make up for? Chanku were sensual creatures. His five years caught halfway between human and wolf hadn’t been conducive to picking up chicks in bars, much less finding a willing female to bed.
Five long years without sex. He’d managed fine without the chicks. He couldn’t imagine life without Xandi.
When he’d rescued Xandi, her body had been half frozen, her hair a solid sheet of ice he’d had to pry from the frozen ground.
He’d gotten her into his warm bed just in time to save her life. Stefan shuddered, remembering the fear coursing through him when he’d realized she’d almost died.
Thank goodness she’d survived, because she’d certainly turned the tables and saved his pathetic life. He tried to imagine Ulrich Mason’s lonely existence…. Twenty years without the woman he l
oved.
That poor bastard. Stefan shivered, feeling small-minded and selfish. He had the love of his life; the least he could do was help reunite Ulrich with his, if only for a night.
His thoughts searched for Xandi. He sensed the steady spray of the shower and steam rising around her perfect body. Content in the knowledge that she was close by and safe, Stefan sat in the middle of their bed—the bed he’d slept in alone last night—with his legs crossed and his hands resting on his knees, palms up. He breathed deeply, finding a rhythm that took him almost immediately into a meditative trance.
Stefan opened his heart, opened his mind, felt the first wisps of a gentle peace settle over him. He let his thoughts rest on Ulrich, wondering about all the years the man had spent without his mate, and for a moment Stefan’s concentration faltered.
No, he wouldn’t even try to imagine life without Xandi. He’d been there, and it was hell. Instead he thought of Camille Mason, the ethereal spirit all of them had felt over the past couple weeks, and he pictured Ulrich’s joy should they be successful tonight.
Smiling, Stefan finally found his center, found the peace that had eluded him, and prepared for the coming night. He took one last glance out the window, saw the perfect sky, and sighed. Damn, but he wanted to run.
Now, to find that elusive center once again….
Xandi slipped the white robe over her damp body and combed her fingers through her hair. She knew Stefan had already begun to meditate. She could sense him, so close had they become, two halves of the whole. She imagined his reaction when she finally told him her secret.
Keisha wasn’t the only one who had conceived. Xandi’s palm flattened over her belly, and she smiled. This child would be a creature borne by the most wild mating his mother had ever experienced.
She’d known from the beginning she would have a boy, had felt his strength in the first tiny cells created immediately after conception. That night she and Stefan had hunted alone. They’d brought down a deer, running the beast to the ground, feeding until they were sated, and then crawling off into the brush to clean themselves and sleep.