by Alexis Davie
“You can call me at any time for anything you need,” her mother had said to her over and over again. “I swear whatever it is, you won’t be bothering me, no matter how small or silly you think it might be—”
“Okay, Mom, I got it,” Sadie had replied, almost pushing her mother out of the house. “I can call you if I need anything, good to know.”
“And if I can’t answer for whatever reason,” her mother had gone on, “you can call your father, too—”
“Okay, Mom, I’ll make sure to try calling both of you if I need to.”
“And I know that there’s food in the fridge, but if you want me to buy you anything else, or if you want me to get you some groceries—”
“Mom,” Sadie had snapped. “I can buy my own groceries, okay? I’m an adult. I can take care of myself.”
She might not have made the best decisions, but she was still self-sufficient, and even though she appreciated the unconditional support she had from her family, it also felt a bit suffocating, like she needed to reassure them that she could breathe by herself without her lungs collapsing in on themselves.
Sadie was starting to get used to the quietness. She had tried watching a random TV show while she did some chores around the house, but she had ended up either ignoring it completely or wanting to watch more of it, which she couldn’t very well do while she still had chores to get done. She had also tried playing some music, but all songs she heard reminded her of being in school, or of Ellie, or even of Raven, and thinking about any of those subjects always brought her down, leaving her in a mood and mindset she preferred not to be stuck in.
It wasn’t all that bad. She had continued doing research on the topics of her favorite classes back at EMU, and she knew she wouldn’t be alone for much longer. That brought its own set of worries and fears for Sadie, but she was confident that she would pull through one way or another. She had to.
She was making a stew with some of the groceries her father had bought a few days ago when she heard the doorbell ringing and frowned to herself. Had either of her parents forgotten their keys on their way out? Ringing the doorbell seemed like such a formality, considering they both knew she was the only one home.
Sadie turned off the stove and headed to the door.
“Hey,” she started saying, “how was your day at—?”
Her words died on the tip of her tongue and she felt herself pale when she saw who stood in front of her.
“Hey to you!” said Ellie, smiling as widely as she had been the last time Sadie had seen her. She had a backpack slung over one shoulder. “My day was pretty good, actually! I skipped school, I took a four-hour flight, which was my first flight ever, so that was really interesting, and I’m visiting my best friend. And that’s only been half of my day so far!”
She opened her arms, as though she was expecting a hug, but Sadie could only stare at her, completely dumbfounded.
“What are you doing here?” she asked, realizing how rude she had sounded only after she had spoken.
Ellie’s smile faltered, and she dropped her arms to her sides. “I came to see you. I thought that was pretty obvious.”
“Why?” Sadie asked, once again much more rudely than she would’ve liked.
“Because you disappeared,” Ellie answered. “I thought it was weird when you didn’t show up for the first day of school after break, but I figured you would’ve said something if it was anything to worry about. And then you missed the first week, and I thought that was even weirder. And then you stopped texting back, and whenever I called, I couldn’t get a hold of you, so I started to worry a little bit. And then I asked at the administration office and found out that you’d dropped out, and I thought to myself, there’s no way Sadie would’ve dropped out if everything was okay. Something’s wrong, and she’s not telling me anything, so I’m going to have to go to her myself.”
“I didn’t tell you anything because it’s none of your business,” Sadie replied, hoping that would get Ellie to give up and leave. “If I decided to drop out, that’s my own damn right, and I don’t owe you any explanations!”
The truth was that she hadn’t wanted to involve Ellie in the complicated mess that her life had become. When her friend had started sending her worried texts and calling her, asking her if there was anything wrong, Sadie had panicked, and she had stopped responding to any attempt from Ellie to contact her. There was a small part of her that didn’t want to believe her situation was actually real, and if she’d told Ellie, it would make everything undeniable. She didn’t know how she’d be able to stand it.
To her credit, Ellie simply nodded her head.
“Okay,” she said. “I don’t believe for a second that you dropped out because you wanted to, but you’re right. It’s none of my business, and you don’t owe me any explanations. So, I’ll just leave, then.” The smile she gave Sadie was a genuinely polite one, like she had bothered Sadie by showing up and was now apologizing. “I wish you the best, Sadie.”
She turned around and took two steps away from Sadie’s front door before Sadie realized she couldn’t take it anymore.
“Wait!” she cried out.
Ellie whirled to face her.
Sadie opened the door all the way. “Do you want to come in?”
---
“You really don’t owe me any explanations, you know,” Ellie said once she was seated on the couch in Sadie’s living room, dropping her backpack on the ground at her feet. “I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”
“How did you even find me?” Sadie wondered, sitting next to her.
“Well.” Ellie turned so that her side was leaning against the back of the couch. “I knew you lived in Wyoming, but I wasn’t sure where, so I asked at the administration office. They gave me the name of your hometown but not much else, which I understand and appreciate. Keeping students safe and all that, good for them. So I arrived here and just started asking around for Sadie Farley. All the people were super nice to me, and I was pleasantly surprised at how homey the whole town feels! Much different from New York, and I think I like this better than the city, which I greatly dislike.”
Sadie let out a disbelieving huff, which ended up turning into a chuckle mixed with a scoff.
“I can’t believe it,” she said, and she realized her eyes were burning with unshed tears and there was a knot in her throat. “You… you came all the way here because you were worried about me—”
“Of course I did,” Ellie said, like it had always been the obvious thing to do.
Sadie closed her eyes and pressed the heels of her palms to them. She didn’t deserve a friend like Ellie, who had taught her that stepping out of her comfort zone could bring wonderful things, who had listened to her while she talked about the guy she had ditched her for, who had flown all the way from New York just to make sure that she was okay.
It was because of Ellie that Sadie had even met Raven that night, and Sadie had never even thanked her for it.
“Oh, no, Sadie, honey, don’t cry…” Ellie gently wrapped her arms around her and pulled her close. Sadie hadn’t even noticed she’d started crying until she felt the wetness against her hands. “It’s okay, it’s fine, I loved actually traveling on an airplane, I’d never done that before, so I didn’t know what to expect—”
“I’m pregnant,” Sadie mumbled, and she took a shuddering breath and released it in a sob that immediately became full-on weeping.
She had been keeping it a secret since she’d found out, and she hadn’t known how much it was hurting her, how much she needed to say it out loud, how much she needed to tell someone, anyone, and know that they would not judge her. That they would simply let her cry and hold her through it.
“Well,” Ellie said, “I definitely didn’t expect that when I jumped on the plane, let me tell you that.” Her embrace grew tighter. “Is it…?”
“Yeah,” Sadie hiccupped, knowing what Ellie was asking.
Is it Raven’s?
O
ne week before the school year resumed its course, Sadie had begun feeling ill. She’d been nauseous for a few days, but she had blamed it on her usual back-to-school jitters and thought nothing of it. The Friday before she was set to fly back to New York, she woke up needing to vomit, and she started to worry that she might be horribly sick. Her parents convinced her to stay for a couple days more so that she could recover, even though Sadie wanted to believe that she was perfectly fine and had probably only caught a flu. But as the days went by, she felt more tired, more nauseous, and she had constant headaches.
The day she realized she was pregnant, though, was when her mother cooked her favorite dish—pot roast with a serving of Cobb salad—and after Sadie took one bite out of it, she had to run to the bathroom to throw up. She’d never had an aversion to anything her mother cooked, much less to her pot roast, so she had gone to the closest drugstore behind her parents’ backs to buy a pregnancy test, and her suspicions had been confirmed.
“Does anyone else know?” Ellie asked kindly, rubbing Sadie’s back.
“No,” Sadie said, wiping her eyes. “I told my parents I needed a break from school and would go back when I felt ready, but I…I can’t keep it a secret for much longer. They’ll realize eventually, and then what am I going to tell them?”
“That you’re going to have a baby,” Ellie replied, and her bluntness made Sadie laugh at how simple that sounded. “And that you’re going to be a kickass mom who goes to school while raising her child.” When Sadie tensed in her arms, she added, “Or you can just be a kickass mom. It’s really up to you, but whatever you do, I know you’ll be a kickass mom. That’s unquestionable.”
Sadie snorted, smiling to herself. It was nice to have Ellie Hanson, someone whom she considered to be kickass in general, tell her she thought the same of her. It was nice to have that kind of support, especially after Sadie had felt so alone lately, thinking of the kind of life she wanted to give her unborn child. She would probably go back to school at some point, since she did want to finish her education, no matter how long it took her.
“I know this might be a stupid question,” Ellie said, “but… is there anyone else you’re thinking of telling?”
Sadie recognized the real question Ellie had meant to ask her, and she shook her head. Raven wouldn’t want anything to do with her, much less with a baby. He was the son of the most powerful alpha in the world, and the last thing he probably wanted was for his legacy to be smeared by the revelation of a tryst he’d had with a random, ordinary shifter from a small, ordinary town in Wyoming.
Besides, despite her mixed feelings for Raven, Sadie couldn’t help looking back on their night together with nothing but fondness and affection. It had truly been one of the best nights of her entire life, if not the best. She always tried to avoid wondering what would’ve happened if Raven hadn’t been gone the morning after, or if she had waited for him to return, in case he had. Would they be together now? Would they be preparing to have their baby side by side, with his arms wrapped protectively around her and his mouth pressed to the top of her head?
Sadie’s whole being ached with how much she suddenly missed him. She remembered how she felt that night they were together—their souls were entwined, and their bodies were trying to do the exact same thing with their physical capabilities.
The emptiness in her chest reminded her why she had done her best not to think of Raven. No matter how much she told herself she had just been his latest conquest, a traitorous part of her refused to believe so, and Sadie refused to let that part of herself fill her with unfounded hope.
“You know what you need?” Sadie could hear the smile on Ellie’s face without needing to see it.
“What?”
“A girls’ night out!” Ellie cried. “Or, well, a girls’ day out, I guess. You’re going to have to show me around, because I do not know any place here.”
Sadie laughed out loud and broke free of Ellie’s embrace. Hanging out with her best friend at a café or something sounded perfect, and it would be fun to catch up with Ellie and hear what she had gotten up to in the time since they had last seen each other.
“I know a place a few minutes away from here,” she said. “Just let me go grab my purse.”
6
Raven was incredibly close to losing his goddamn mind.
He had spent the last three weeks searching tirelessly for any sign or clue that might lead him to Sadie, and still, he had come up empty-handed. He had turned his room at the Delmore upside down and inside out, trying to find something with her scent on it that he could track in an attempt to find her.
Scent-tracking was an old, almost abandoned technique for wolf shifters, who had no more need for it with the advancements in technology, both human and immortal, but Raven was desperate enough to try it. He felt like he would jump out of his own skin any moment now.
After yet another useless search through his hotel room, he decided to call it a day and go back to his dorm at EMU. He needed a break. Maybe taking a few days off would let him come back with clearer eyes and another perspective.
Raven slammed his head back against the wall of the elevator and groaned out loud. He should’ve never left Sadie on her own. He should’ve ignored his father’s call and dealt with the consequences instead of having potentially lost his mate forever after he had finally found her.
God. He’d always thought that was nothing more than an old wives’ tale. Find the person you’re meant to be with and live happily ever after. Well, he’d gotten the first part down and then screwed it all up.
The elevator came to a stop at the reception, and the doors slid open to let Raven out. Just as he was heading straight to the exit, he heard someone call out to him in a hushed voice.
“Mr. Raven! Mr. Raven!” It was Thomas over at the reception desk, gesturing wildly with one hand to get his attention. “Mr. Raven! Sir!” He motioned for Raven to come to the desk, beckoning him. “Mr. Raven!”
Raven was not in the mood to engage in conversation with Thomas right now, but the boy seemed about to burst at the seams, his brow pinched in something akin to pain. Whatever he wanted to tell Raven must have been important, so Raven held back an irritated sigh and made his way to the reception desk.
“What is it, Thomas?” he asked, unable to keep the frustration out of his voice. “I’m kind of in a hurry at the moment.”
“I’m sorry, sir,” Thomas apologized, “but you told me to let you know whenever Mr. Lancaster asked about you—”
“My father was here?” Raven was immediately wary, and he turned around and quickly scanned the lobby. It was never a good thing when his father tried to find out where he had been or whom he had been with at any given moment, and alarm bells started to ring in Raven’s head. He had been careless enough to let his father discover he even had a room in this hotel for whenever he wanted to just be Raven instead of Raven Lancaster; the last thing he wanted was for the man to be snooping around.
“No, not him himself,” Thomas said. “But he sent some men to ask if you’d brought anyone here lately—”
“You didn’t tell him anything, did you?” Raven questioned. Thomas had always been loyal to him rather than his father, and he hated to think that he might’ve betrayed him.
“No! Of course I didn’t tell anybody anything!” Thomas reassured him, fervently shaking his head. “But I wasn’t at the desk when Mr. Lancaster’s men showed up. Reggie was.”
Raven cursed under his breath. Reggie was one of the people his father had bought off a long time ago, just like he had bought off half of New York’s wolf shifters, and it was just Raven’s luck that it had been him and not Thomas at the reception desk when his men had come to ask about him.
“Wait.” Raven glared at Thomas. “Did Reggie tell them I wasn’t alone that night?”
Thomas paled under his scrutiny. “I’m sorry, sir, I don’t know.”
Raven whirled and strode to the sliding doors of the hotel. His parents were v
ery particular about the beings he was allowed to interact with in his life. If his father had found out anything about Sadie, she could be in trouble. He needed to talk to his father and find out exactly what he knew.
---
Mr. Lancaster was sitting at the desk in his office when Raven threw the doors open and walked inside without announcing himself. He knew it pissed his father off, but right now, he wasn’t thinking about making him snap, so he couldn’t even enjoy the barely concealed tightening of his jaw, an old tick his father had had for decades now.
“Ah, Raven,” said Mr. Lancaster. “Just who I wanted to see.”
“What were your men doing at the Delmore?” Raven hissed, getting straight to the point.
“Making sure you weren’t embarrassing our family name,” his father answered. “It’s bad enough that you have a hotel room to begin with, but it’s even worse that I can’t force you to get rid of it without causing a scene with the press. As if I didn’t have enough to worry about without my son having a mistress.”
“A mis—” Raven felt like he was having a completely different conversation than his father. Mistress? Who even used that word anymore? “What the hell are you even talking about?! What mistress?!”
“Oh, please,” Mr. Lancaster groaned. “Did you think I wouldn’t find out about your little affair at the Delmore? Do give me more credit than that, Raven.”
“My little—” Raven stopped short.
His father was talking about his night with Sadie. He couldn’t mean anyone else, and if he thought of Sadie as Raven’s ‘mistress’, he had surely investigated her. He must’ve sent half of the men under his command all over the place until they had found her. He would know where she lived, or at the very least, where she was at the moment. Now all Raven had to do was get that information.