“The only girl for me is you. I’ve never wanted anyone the way I want you.”
“Oh.”
Hearing him say it like that makes my pulse stutter and my stomach swoop. My unruly heart runs laps.
“You’re in my veins. You course through me, give me life.” He brings his face close to mine, the warmth of his breath fluttering over my mouth. “You’re the first person I told about architecture. I want you to be the first person I tell all of my dreams and fears to.”
A swell of emotion builds in my chest. I stare at him, speechless.
“I swear nothing will ever hurt you again. I’ll make sure of it.” Lucas cups my cheek. I hold my hand over his, tracing his battered knuckles. “Will you be mine, Gemma? If you can forgive me and accept me, will you let me love you the way you deserve?”
Since the first encounter with Lucas he has demanded everything of me.
Stolen firsts from me without mercy.
Held me in his control.
He took what he wanted. He tried to command my loyalty in the past.
This isn’t that.
It’s Lucas asking me. He offers his heart on a platter, if I’ll have it. I can tell if I say no, he would accept it.
“Yes.”
I gasp as his mouth covers mine in a searing kiss. The gentle tentativeness is burned away in a rush of heat that has me clawing to get closer to him. Raindrops speckle us and the thunder matches the sounds we make as our kiss becomes a storm of its own.
A phoenix soars in my body, the white-hot flames rising from the ashes of the demons that haunted me to overwrite new memories, strengthening me.
My broken heart heals in that moment as I fuse my soul to Lucas’ with a kiss.
A shiver runs down my spine as we part. I don’t know whether it’s from an epic kiss or the chilling rain.
“We should probably get out of here. You’ll get sick.” He leads me to his Range Rover, the heat of the interior a warm embrace. He helps me into the passenger seat and gets a blanket from the back to bundle me, carefully tucking the edges around my body. “Can I kidnap you for old time’s sake? I’ll keep you warm and feed you. You can hog Lancelot for companionship.”
“You’re a dork.” I shake my head, smiling.
Lucas winks and shuts the door. He stands beneath the low-hanging bough of a pine tree as he talks on his phone.
When he gets in, he reaches across to take my hand. “Community security will get your car and bring it up to my place. I’d have Dev do it, but he’s busy at the house.”
I nod as Lucas turns us around and drives up the road. I occupy myself by brushing the pads of my fingers over his knuckles. The skin doesn’t feel broken, it’s only stained by the blood of someone that tried to hurt me. This is the second time he’s taken me back after a rainy rescue mission. I squeeze his hand and flash him a smile when he returns it.
The rain begins to die down. Cars pass us on the road, coming down from Lucas’ place. As we pull in more than half are gone.
“Where’s the fire?”
“Who cares, I’m not in a party mood. Are you?”
“Not really.”
We get out and find Devlin, Alec, and Connor herding people into his SUV. Lancelot dances around their feet, barking at the commotion. When we walk up, Lancelot abandons them to circle around us, sitting on my shoes.
“Did you get it done?” Lucas asks Devlin cryptically.
“Yeah. They put up a fight, but Connor’s got blackmail on Burns that shut him up. Once we threw him and Marissa out, it ended the party.” Devlin holds up a finger. “But not to worry. I am generously opening my house to those too drunk to go home. A few other people that live here are doing the same.”
Lucas lifts his brows. “That’s unlike you.”
“You can thank me later.” Devlin shrugs and glances at me. “We didn’t want you guys to come back to a raging party.”
“Thanks,” I say.
People groan as they trudge out of the house.
Alec comes over. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” I assure him.
Alec breathes in relief. “Good.” He hugs me. “Do you want me to take you home?”
I shake my head. “I’m staying here.”
My hand finds Lucas’ and I thread our fingers together.
“Okay. I’ll crash at Devlin’s after I drive everyone over there.”
“This way—yes you, too. Come on.”
Connor waves like he’s guiding a plane, directing people to the line of running cars with open doors. The foggy headlights of swanky brands make it look like a mismatched caterpillar of expensive proportions.
Devlin sees my confused expression and gestures to the cars as people pile in. “Drunk shuttle service.”
There’s a tug on my hand.
“Come on.” Lucas nods to the deck.
I follow him up. Lancelot runs inside, pads across the room, and flops into a cushy bed. The house empties and we have the place to ourselves.
* * *
Steam fills the bathroom.
Lucas asks before taking off my ripped shirt, voice deep.
It’s funny how the first time I was in this room I felt on high alert. Now I feel safe and at ease.
“It’s okay. I trust you.”
He sways into me, dropping feathery kisses on my cheek.
Lucas peels my ruined shirt over my head and watches my face for any protest before unclasping my bra. He hugs me. My breasts press to his bare chest. His skin is warm.
He spends a few minutes massaging my back until the rigidness bleeds out of me. I melt against him with a faint sound.
“I’ve got you, baby. Let me erase all your hurts.”
We finish undressing, both of us cracking up as we struggle with the leather pants that melded to my body after the rain. The burst of humor feels good. Lucas kneels at my feet to yank them down until I’m free, mouthing at my thigh as he exposes it.
The kiss of the shower when we step in is heaven. I tip my head back and Lucas supports my weight from behind. The hot water washes over my skin in a cascade I embrace.
I lift his hand and clean the blood until the water runs clear, then bring it against my lips to nuzzle it. The skin is red and tender, likely to bruise.
Lucas turns me in his arms and I wrap around him. Steam cloaks us as the water beats down on my back.
“This isn’t the first time,” I whisper against his chest.
His embrace tightens, but he remains quiet. I tip all of my secrets out, ready to give Lucas my whole heart.
“I was sixteen. He was…Alec’s best friend. We’ve known him since we were kids. We were all at a party. Matt and I had been flirting a lot. I was crushing on him hard.”
There’s a rumble in Lucas’ chest. His hands flex on my back.
“I thought Matt was going to ask me out. That’s why I went into the room with him, away from the party. The cheap beer went to my head. I didn’t realize until—” At the hitch in my breath, Lucas crushes me to him. It gives me the anchor I need to go on. “He never kissed me. He only held me down and tried to—”
The last of my sentence is cut off when Lucas tips my head up and seals his lips to mine. His shoulders shake and I press my fingers into them to bring him back to me. He pants against my mouth.
“No one will ever hurt you again. Will you let me take care of you?”
I hum and snake my arms around his neck.
“Can I—?” Lucas glides his palm down to my hip. “I want to make you feel good.”
“Yes. Please.”
My hold on his neck tightens as his fingers burn paths across my skin. He kisses my neck as his fingers delve between my legs. He traces every path where I was tarnished and hurt, marking me his all over again.
My shallow breaths become low moans as I buck against his fingers.
Lucas murmurs encouragement against my neck. He sinks to his knees, propping one of my legs up to give him better access. He devours m
e with a slow, methodical focus that drives me mad.
The pleasure soars, pulsing in my clit. My cries echo off the tile as I hold on to his hair, my thighs shuddering.
Then I peel apart at the seams, the ache bursting like shimmering starlight.
Lucas stands, putting me back together with a deep kiss.
“I need more.”
He pauses, studying me through heavy-lidded eyes. “Are you okay to keep going? We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.”
I can see the shadow of his cock jutting.
“Please, Lucas.” I’m alight with the tingles only Lucas can bring on. I dig my fingers into his hair. My voice is a husky rasp. “I want you to make me forget. I only want to know your touch.”
Lucas groans and kisses me again.
He turns off the shower and lifts me up, bracing a palm beneath my ass. I wrap my legs around him as he takes his time stepping from the shower so we don’t overbalance. The whole time, his lips never leave mine.
He lumbers into the bedroom, pausing to retrieve a condom from his nightstand.
As Lucas settles me in his lap, time seems to slow, syncing to our breaths. The beads of water cool on our skin. I trace them, mesmerized as they roll from his shoulders, down his pecs and over his stomach. He rolls the condom on and caresses my hip.
“Take what you need from me, sweetheart.” Lucas cradles me in his arms as I straddle him. He swoops in for a kiss, threading his fingers in my damp hair. “Don’t stop until you feel good. Then do it all over again.”
I inhale as I sink down, welcoming the sensation of connecting to Lucas. We rock together in a sedate rhythm. Lucas strokes up and down my back.
His lips part. I trace the corners of his mouth, following with my lips.
We are two pieces that fit together, unbreakable as a sailor’s knot. We are joined beneath the stars, surrounded by love as we float to the sky together on waves of perfect pleasure.
I do as Lucas told me, owning my body. I take a page from his book and bring myself to the edge over and over until I can’t any longer.
When I reach that peak, Lucas holds me close, taking over. He whispers to me as we chase our release together. We tremble and quake as we tip over into oblivion.
Lucas presses soft kisses to my shoulder as he shifts us into bed, taking care of me. He draws me into his arms and my palm finds his chest, covering his heartbeat as I drift into a peaceful sleep.
* * *
Two weeks later, the party music has me bouncing and rocking.
Being at Lucas’ house is becoming a staple, which comes with a party most weekends when his parents go out of town.
The party doesn’t bring me the same grief. I have my boyfriend, my friends, and my brother around.
“I challenge you to a dance off.” Alec points at me and executes a disco move that’s at odds with the music. “Winner gets bragging rights and control of the Netflix account for a month.”
A bright laugh escapes me as I twirl with flare. “Oh, Alec. It is so on.”
He makes a solid effort. Elena hollers and fist pumps for him.
Alec catches the eye of that pretty girl he’s been waltzing around for weeks. He winks at her and she waves.
I blow him out of the water when I end my turn with a split. Everyone around us cheers and I hold my arms overhead.
“What! Oh, come on.” Alec tries to rally the crowd judging our battle. “Half the girls here can do a split!”
“No go, dude,” Elena laments. “My girl killed it.”
I grin at her. “Enjoy hours of travel documentaries.”
Alec groans dramatically.
I slip away from the dancers to find Blair. She’s my official party buddy tonight, and it took a lot of convincing for her to come. She has a drink and stands by Lancelot.
“I see you’ve met the dog.”
Blair glances down at him. “Dogs are better than people.”
I chuckle. “No argument there.”
Her attention floats past my shoulder. I turn to find Devlin glaring at her. I roll my eyes.
“Don’t let him bother you. You’re welcome here.”
“These people never accepted me before.”
“Well, let’s change that. They’re not all bad.”
Blair shrugs. She gestures to Lancelot. “As long as I can hang out with this cute, perfect guy I found, I’m cool to stay.”
“I’m glad you’re here,” I tell her with a big smile.
I’m slowly learning that joining in isn’t the death sentence I once feared. It worked for a while to shield myself, but I feel more like myself than ever, now that I’ve stopped keeping everyone at arm’s length.
I still won’t give the jerks that bullied me the time of day, but Lucas and his closest friends accept me. Anyone that has given me a problem in the last couple of weeks gets my teeth, along with my brother and Lucas flanking me.
No one crosses me now. I’m not the weak prude they labeled me as. I never was.
I jump when hands grab my hips. I’m spun around and warm lips collide with mine in the best kind of déjà vu. The forest-fresh scent hits my nose. I smile into the familiar kiss with Lucas.
He runs his fingers through my hair as his tongue teases me. I open for him, my toes curling as he stakes his claim in front of everyone.
People howl like coyotes all around us.
I tuck my hands into his back pockets in a mirror of the first time he kissed me. He chuckles against my mouth as I squeeze his ass.
I claim Lucas right back. I’m his and he’s mine. We belong to each other.
Thirty-Six
Epilogue
Gemma
The marching band gets the crowd pumped from their section in the stands at the Homecoming game. I get swept into the excitement, jumping up and down when the team spills onto the field.
“Who knew you were such a maniac fan,” Devlin teases, elbowing me.
He and Connor found me in the stands and joined me.
I shoot him a sly look. “I used to be on pep squad.”
His brows hike up. “I would have never guessed that.”
“What’s wrong with my level of pep?”
Devlin snorts at my sarcasm.
Officially, I’m here to take photos of the game for Ms. Huang and the school newspaper. My camera hangs around my neck as I clap for the band.
When Alec and Lucas’ names are introduced by the announcer, along with their positions, I cheer.
There’s a thrill of being surrounded by hundreds of other people yelling, music thrumming, and love filling your heart as you support your team.
All of my support today is for Alec and Lucas.
His eyes zero in on me as the team comes to the bench. Alec slaps him on the shoulder.
The look on Lucas’ face is worth everything. It splits into a huge, prideful grin. He shoots a fist overhead, pointing right at me. I wave back.
I’m wearing his number. Devlin got me his alternate jersey. Saint is broadcast from my back in block letters so everyone knows.
I lift my camera to capture his face in time, snapping the shutter.
There’s a notable player missing as the game gets underway. A different guy plays the position previously held by Carter Burns. He’s off the team.
Lucas got his dad to help me pro bono when I changed my mind, determined to make sure Carter could never attack anyone again. I pressed charges with Mr. Saint’s guidance. Carter got five years in jail. Everyone will know he’s a predator.
This time I battled my fear and told Mom and Dad everything, even the truth about Matt. Mom cried and hugged me close as Dad touched my shoulder. It felt good to be honest with them.
Lucas’ parents and mine sit higher in the stands, with the other team parents.
The game is close. I end up swatting Devlin half the time as our guys drive the ball to the end zone down to the wire. There’s only a few minutes left, the timer running out fast. The other team is ah
ead. The Coyotes need this play to take the game.
My trigger finger is on fire as I capture shot after shot. As usual, Lucas hogs the spotlight in my photos. I can’t help it—his grace when he throws the ball is unparalleled.
It’ll be fun to make him throw the ball in a field for a photo project I have in mind for my portfolio. We’re going hiking this weekend and he said he knows the perfect spot.
Lucas sends the ball spiraling through the air and it sails straight to Alec, who cuts across to an open position with wings on his feet.
We shout ourselves hoarse as Alec sprints to make the touchdown. The buzzer announces the end of the fourth quarter seconds after Alec passes into the end zone. He slams the ball into the turf and his teammates tackle him. The stands go wild.
A voice on the loudspeaker calls it. “Coyotes win over the Bulldogs 28 to 26!”
The marching band explodes into a celebratory song as the players on the field celebrate their win.
I cup my hands as I see number 14 and number 19 head for the bench, trailed by the rest of the team. “Go Lucas! Go Alec!”
Lucas hauls himself over the fence, heading for the bleachers. He sprints up to me, a grinning, sweaty mess.
“Congratulations!”
Other people around us in the stands echo my sentiments.
“I had my lucky charm in the stands.” Lucas takes my camera and tucks it into my bag. He lifts me, arms around my waist. “Couldn’t lose if I tried. Not when you were up here wearing my number. It looks good on you.”
“How’s it feel to play your last game?”
“Fucking awesome.” He tilts his head. “But I’ll still play for fun. As long as I don’t have to join an official team.”
He plans to hand over his position to the reserve player. When he told me, he said it was time to pass the torch for the championship game. He wants to give the chance to someone that works hard and has their heart in fighting for the win.
“How are you planning to celebrate?”
Lucas smirks. “First, this.”
He kisses me, the heat of it making me melt in his arms.
A camera phone shutter sounds in my ear. We part and find Devlin shaking his head with a wry expression.
Wicked Saint: Sinners and Saints Book 1 Page 23