Tony is trying to put the pieces together. He appears to have blacked out. He scratches his eyes and rubs his headache and tries to figure out what happened and why he is in jail.
He notices he is staring out of a small window in the heavy door of his jail cell. It is affectionately called the drunk-tank for this reason in particular. The floor space is empty minus a small, half circle reception desk and a row of pay phones with stools in front of them. A uniformed officer sits behind the desk at his computer.
Tony sees cops walk by and begins beating on the door screaming at cops as they walk by.
“Hey! Hey, man? Where am I at?” he pleads.
The cops walk by without notice.
He has blood all over his white button up shirt, which also torn. His fingertips are covered in black ink. He whips his dick out and pisses on the floor, not two steps from the toilet. He sits on the small concrete block by the toilet and stares at it, satisfied.
He gets back up and walks back the window and looks out again. He can see other people looking out their windows as well in their cells.
There is screaming and yelling from across the hall. Someone is beating on their door. He gets no attention either. Next the arrested individual runs into the door. He does so again, his body splattering quickly into his window and door then onto the floor. The officer at the reception desk picks up the phone and calls for back up. He gets up, grabs his night stick and goes to the cell.
“You better calm the hell down there before I come in there and beat the ever loving shit out of you,” yells the officer, so loud Tony can hear is from across the large hallway and behind his own door.
From the right of Tony’s vision, he notices an extremely large man strut to the cell door. His face is hidden behind a large cowboy hat. The officer hands him his walkie-talkie. The large man says something into it and walks away from the cell with the officer leaving the man inside his cell to beat himself. The badge the large man’s leather vest reads ‘Sheriff.’ They walk across the hallway to where Tony’s cell is located. They pass they door but stop outside the door outside of Tony’s vision.
“Give the idiot his belt and shoe laces back,” says the Sheriff in a deep voice.
“Sir, this guy is loaded with PCP, he may kill himself,” says the officer.
“That’s alright. Just have one of the interns do the paperwork for you. I will take care of the rest.”
“Yes sir.”
The officer walks back to the desk and opens a drawer with the crazy man’s belonging and walks to his door. He finds a key from the key chain on his belt and opens the door. Tony can only hear the screaming. The officer comes out of the cell and put his night stick back in its holder and comes across the hallway back to Tony’s room grabbing at his keys again. He walks in.
“Want to make your phone call? God damn son, you piss on the floor?” the officer asks disgusted.
“Yep.”
“Come on. Let’s go.”
The officer hand cuffs Tony and leads him out of the cell to the phones in the middle of the hallway. He rubs his eyes to hard he is practically tickling his brain. He cannot call his mother, she would die. He picks up the phone, holding it against his head then hangs it back on the receiver. The officer grabs him up by the shoulders, leads him back to his cell and throws him in, slamming and locking the door behind him.
“Sober up,” yells the officer as he peels away from the door.
Tony sits up and feels the wetness of his own piss on his back.
The Dean of Student’s office is covered in Phoenician blinds. The large white letters on the door spell out ‘Dean of Students Dickson.’ The secretary outside the door is a graduate student and is filing her nails, bored.
Tony is sitting on a small wooden bench in the waiting room in front of the secretary. The door to the office cracks open and the secretary cocks her head back and to the left motioning for Tony that the Dean is ready to see him.
Tony struts into the office to see the Dean sitting at his desk with an opened file. Tony looks around the office and cannot see one space of white wall, or any colored wall. They are covered in plaques and awards; whether it is for community service or charitable work. He also has his degrees framed. He looks up at Tony and extends his hand across the desk. They shake. The Dean grips firmly and slightly throws Tony hand back at him. Tony does take notice of it and stares back at the Dean. Tony sits down in the cushy leather chair and bounces around, breaking it in. he smells the scent of Pledge or Lode English. He looks back at the desk and can see his reflection on the mahogany. He wipes his right middle finger across the desk. Not one dust mite to be seen.
“Hello, Mr. - umm”
“Call me Tony.”
“Alright well I am going to start by reading the charges to you. How are we doing to day?”
“No hangover, so far so good. And yeah, well, I don’t remember anything that happened that night, so whatever.
“Ok well I do have listed here a drunk in public and an endangering conduct.”
“What the hell is endangering conduct? I wasn’t endangering anybody. I just wanted to go to bed.”
“Endangering conduct is when, at anytime, you could hurt, endanger, someone else or yourself. And I have here that you were looking for a girl in the archives building?” The Dean says with a puzzled look.
“Well maybe not my bed, but definitely somebody’s.”
“Do you not have any morals at all?”
“Morals are bound in cages of perspective. It is impossible for you to understand and/or comprehend the fundamentals ways in which my people and I act. Everything is permitted and nothing is limited. What you may call reckless I call independence; a strong and measured, independence. ”
“Ok I am going to make this quick. My ruling is that you attend the alcohol awareness course for the drunk in public. And a $300 dollar fine for endangering conduct. Four weeks of conduct probation. Also I would like you to talk to someone about your alcohol or drug problem. We have an on site psychologist here at the university who loves dealing with, umm, people like yourself.”
“The last thing I want is for you to sympathize with the danger of dangers you think I may put myself in I’m young, man. I just want to party, have a good time. This is freedom. Do my own thing in my own time. Dig?”
“I’m sorry son, but there are rules and regulations, I have to follow them just as much as you. Now if you want to live outside the rules or laws of this institution, I’ll see to it that you will not ever step foot, not only on the grounds of this university, but any other. I have that power. I will use it. In case you didn’t take notice, there are a lot of changes that are being made not only by this office, but by the city itself. Wake up. Good day, sir. Get out of my office.”
“Well it has been nice meeting you. I will show myself out the door.”
They stare each other down as Tony rises from his chair walks to the door covered in Phoenician blinds.
The darkness of night shadows the view of the University from Tony’s window. Mitch is lying in his bed ready for the night, flipping through channels on his small TV positioned at the foot of his bed so only he can see. Tony is getting ready in the bathroom.
“I meant to ask you how your date with the dean went?” ask Mitch.
“That guy is a dick. I have to take some stupid class or talk to a counselor or something I don’t know. Whatever it is I’m not doing it,” says Tony.
“Have you told your mom?”
“No. Confidentiality. She won’t ever know.”
“I think you should tell them. Oh, dude how much more stuff do you need to get from your room.”
“Nope. I have everything I need.”
“Well, you definitely need sheets. I bet them garbage bags are comfortable at night. That kind of embarrassed me when that chick asked.”
“They keep me warm. And they’re not yours, don’t get embarrassed.”
Mitch walks in the bathroom and sees T
ony, with his deer knife, stabbing his legs.
“What in the hell are you doing!” Mitch screams.
“My jeans need more holes. Besides how cool would it be with a few blood stains?”
“Give me knife are you crazy? Have you lost your damn mind?”
“No, not all, I’m ok.”
Mitch grabs the knife from Tony, places it in his desk drawer and slams it shut.
Tony walks out of the bathroom behind Mitch. Nonchalantly and sprays body spray on himself, so much so that a thick cloud forms around him, causing him to cough and wave the air around.
“Tonight I’m going out with the sole purpose of getting laid. If not then I’ll drink away my sorrows. Then finish of with some good doobs.”
“Well while you’re at it, throw some girls my way.”
Mitch walks to his closet and grabs a coat. Tony just has a small white under shirt under his tight rock and roll shirt. They both walk out the door together.
“Dude, have you talked to Bryan? He sounded like hell,” says Tony.
“Yeah he told me he wasn’t going out tonight, said his stomach still hurt.”
“Shit, throw a party in his face and he’ll cheer right up.”
After getting to Bryans door the open the door and peek inside and see that Bryan is curled up in his bed, covers drawn, pale and sickly looking. All the lights are off and there’s a bucket by the head of the bed. Empty.
“Holy shit dude. You look like fuck. Maybe you should go to the ER,” Mitch suggests.
Bryan bellows out a deathly moan.
“Damn. Let’s go, he’s not coming out,” seethes Tony.
Bryan remains unresponsive.
“Alright man, we’re heading out. I hope you feel better man,” says Tony waving his arm and hand bye.
He shoots Bryan a demonic look. Mitch and Tony leave. After they’ve shut the door and take a few steps the door opens and Bryan emerges.
“Fuck it, what’s one night?” Bryan says in a cracked voice.
Tony smiles and nods, Mitch shakes his head.
“That’s my boy!” proclaims Tony.
“You’re going to kill someone one day.”
As Tony, Mitch and Bryan walk down the street they are greeted with more sights and sounds of University night life. People are filling the dead leaf-covered lawns and loud music, laughing, yelling ejaculate from the doors and windows. Big muscular guys are outside as faux bouncers, trying to look tough. They stumble towards the steps of the Rugby House and walk through the already opened door. The place is overly crowded. Mitch runs off to go upstairs Tony and Bryan continue to the back in search of beer dodging and weaving through the dancing crowd. They find a large broken freezer filed with cans of beer and bags of ice to keep them cold.
“Shotgun,” asks Bryan
“Fucking aye. Got your keys?”
Bryan pulls out his key chain with an assortment of keys. He pokes holes in his and Tony’s beer.
“Cheers.”
They poke a key into their cans and pop the tops, slamming their heads back chugging the beers. Bryan wins.
“I hate you,” says Tony wiping his face.
In the back corner of the kitchen, there are two girls, short and hippie looking, conversing and constantly looking over at the Tony and Bryan. Both the same size, but one larger breasts and doesn’t have a manly disposition.
Tony spots them and nudges Bryan and points over to them saying, “Free love?” The girls notice come forth smiling.
“Oh wow. I love your hair, man,” says the one who looks like a man.
“Thanks. I grew it myself,” says Tony.
“Straightened it himself too,” jokes Bryan giggling.
“That’s hot, dude,” again coming from the ugly one.
“What’s your name, love?” asks Tony of the more attractive one.
“Emily,” she says. “Don’t worry about me, I’m babysitting her. She’s the crazy one. Her name is Ashley”
“We’ll let Bryan watch that while I watch you.”
“Original.”
Tony is aggravated by her lack of interest in him. Emily looks around the party and can’t seem to find her friend Ashley. Bryan has disappeared also.
“Well how about that?”
“She does this every night. You would think I would know better.”
“Yeah, yeah Bryan too. Can I get you something else to drink?”
“Sure. Don’t get excited. I’m just thirsty.”
As they walk over to the freezer full of beer, Tony sees Bryan and Ashley, through the yellow stained mirror, outside smoking cigarettes.
“Hey, there they are,” Tony says to Emily, pointing outside.
Tony opens Emily’s drink and hands it to her; like a gentleman. They step through the rickety storm door and walk over to Bryan and Ashley, who aren’t really smoking cigarettes.
Tony lights one for himself, then one for Emily. She accepts. He smiles at her. He is slowly chipping away at the ice queen.
“Is that what I think it is?” asks Tony.
“Sure is,” says Bryan, already stoned. He hands Tony the joint he rolled and he takes a couple long hits, causing Bryan some dismay, before giving it back.
In the distance, walking along the back sidewalk, come Mitch, obviously trashed, stumbling and swaying back in forth.
“Ice luge. 5 of them. I’m definitely going to get mono,” slurs Mitch
“I have a very unique talent,” announces Ashley to the crowd.
“No you don’t,” says Tony, hoping this might make her stop talking.
“Come man, you know you need to make nice with the dumb, ugly friends if you want to make real nice with the hot one,” says Mitch still slurring and now laughing.
“Please. Not here,” says Emily.
“Now I am very curious,” says Tony
“I can take my panties off without taking my jeans off, man,” says Ashley slowly.
“What? Are you fucking serious? That is a fantastic talent. You should really be proud of yourself. C’mon you have to do it! Show us!”
“Yeah, man. Why not,” she says as she twists and contorts her lower body and shoving her hand down her pants and working herself.
Emily stands beside Tony. He’s putting his arm around her. She’s getting a little drunk and doesn’t really care anymore.
Finally, after a few minutes of working, she pulls out a blue thong with a Superman emblem on the crotch.
Bryan immediately grabs them, sniffs them, and runs off screaming “I’m going to put them on dude!”
“Dude, I fucking dare you, man. You should run the halls with the thong on!” advises Tony.
“No I have a better idea. I am going to put them on and run around the halls. That’ll really screw with some peoples head’s.
“Everybody is full of great idea’s tonight, I love it,” says Tony.
“I really don’t know if I want to see that,” says Emily.
“When are you ever going to see a flabby eighteen year old college kid run around the halls of a dormitory wearing only a blue Superman thong? I am sorry man but this is too good to miss,” says Ashley.
“Well let’s go. I’m pumped up!” exclaims Bryan who takes off running back to the dormitory.
Tony, Mitch, Emily and Ashley start running behind him.
Everyone is outside Bryan’s door waiting for him to emerge. There’s an excitement building.
“Do you really straighten your hair or does it naturally fall like that?” asks Emily.
“There is nothing natural about this man,” says Mitch slurring.
“No I don’t straighten at all. I brush it and wash it extensively however,” says Tony. “Sometimes I actually wash it in beer.”
“Really, that’s”-
Bryan explodes out of the door, running Emily over in the process. Tony laughs at her. Bryan has commenced running down the hallway with the Superman thong covering his birthday suit. He is also wearing his cowb
oy boots. Ass and skin flab are flopping everywhere. Everyone is laughing hysterically as he completely runs all the way down the hall and disappears. As all are on the floor laughing on the verge of vomiting, people are coming out of their rooms looking to see what the disturbance is, and as they ask…
“I’m streaking! Faster than a speeding bullet! Stay out the way of this locomotive. Whoooo!” yells Bryan
The small crotch with the Superman logo can’t hold back his balls from falling out of the side and flopping everywhere. Disgusted noises from some and laughter from others spread throughout the hallway until he runs into his room and slams the door.
Just a second later a loud scream is heard from the room which causes Tony and Mitch to run in. They see Bryan curled up in a ball by the toilet in extreme pain.
“I need to go to the hospital. Call an ambulance. My stomach is ripping apart,” he cries out excruciated.
Mitch, Dale, and Tony are sitting in an emergency room waiting room. They all have serious looks on their faces.
“He is going to get some ridiculous pain medication. Like he might get Percocet or Vicodin or something good,” says Tony.
Mitch looks over at Tony with an extremely disgusted face.
The nurse walks out of the ‘Patients Only’ Door with a chart in her hand, signaling that they were allowed back to see him.
Tony peeks in every door he passes. Maybe he would see someone on the verge of dying. With every passing door he sees nothing but empty beds, perfectly made.
They reach a room at the end of the long hallway of rooms. The nurse opens the door and lets them in. Bryan is high on a Morphine drip. He is finally smiling and pain free.
“You going to be alright?” asks Dale.
“They think it may be colitis,” says Bryan softly.
“Is that why you’ve been sick?” asks Tony.
“Umm, yeah, that it is exactly why I’ve been sick. But they also aren't sure. Tests were inconclusive.”
“I don’t think your naked run helped. But damn it sure was funny.”
“I’m glad to see you’re doing well though, man. This is serious shit. You know we’re here for you whenever you need anything.”
“I know what we’re going to need once you leave here.”
“This man is lying up in a hospital bed after surgery and all you can think about is drugs.”.
“I didn’t say anything, man.”
“We’ll all have a good time once I get out of here,” says Bryan.
“A little sympathy,” says Mitch, who can only shake his head in disappointment.
“You need your rest man. Y’all ready to go? We’ll be back up to see you. You’re mom called too, she’ll be up tomorrow,” says Dale.
“You called my mom? What the hell is the matter with you? Yeah I think it is time for you leave. Dammit.”
Mitch and Dale exit the room. Tony stays behind. Bryan has turned his head over on the pillow, to get back into his morphine induced sleep. Tony looks at him trying to somehow feel guilty or responsible for this. After a moment, a thought of the fun they’ll have when he gets out with all those pain killers erases his almost synthetic remorse.
Tony and Mitch, lit cigarettes in hand, are walking out towards Mitch's beat up car which has been parked in a reserved parking lot over night. He chooses to do this out of pure laziness. They have a tennis class together this morning.
“You're not going to believe what my mom told me last night,” humbles Tony.
“What’d she want?"
“Well you know how Russell Gettis died a few days ago? Choked on his own vomit right? So many stories going around it’s hard to know what’s true."
"Still sad though."
"Yeah. Sure. Well, what my mom told me was that they went to the viewing yesterday."
"Ok."
"And she said when she saw his dead body in the casket, she started crying."
"You fucking serious?"
"Yeah. I don't know what it is about her ya know. She thinks I'm going to die soon," snickers Tony.
Tony thinks of his Mom, dressed in all black, slowly walking to the casket. Whimpering and sniffling are heard in the background. She peers inside and sees his lifeless body. Skin ghostly and eyes purple. The worst part of the vision is that his dressed in a tuxedo and bald.
Tony's mind retreats from his dreaded vision of his baldness and sees Mitch’s mouth is agape.
"You know, you can throw the biggest party in the world, but nothing brings people together quite like death," professes Tony as he continues down the road.
"Well keep living like you are. Your party will be soon enough."
Mitch then looks over at his red Corolla and sees a parking ticket. He rips it from his windshield and another is sneaking behind it.
"Fuck, man. Never again, that’s $200 this year just on parking tickets," Mitch screams.
He takes the ticket of the windshield, opens his car door and puts the ticket on the center consol with a few other tickets. Also filling his truck are old water bottles, a soccer ball (which he hasn’t used all semester) beer cans, fast food bags and old cigarette wrappers.
A group of kids are sitting down beside the tennis courts. Mitch and Tony are sitting side by side. They’re taking a test.
"Are you fucking kidding me? A test? I didn’t sign up for this class for tests. I signed up for an ‘A’!" whispers Tony. Just show me how to hit the ball. Put someone else on the other side of that net to hit it back. That’s it. Human pong. Shit. I don’t need to know what a ‘love’ is. I hate love. If you score stand here on this hash mark. If he scores you stand here on this mark. I just like hitting the damn ball over the fence. That’s it. That’s it!
"HEY! yells the tennis teacher.
The students turn and look.
"Shut the hell up.”
Mitch is laughing hysterically.
"This is ridiculous. Your fucking idea," Tony tells Mitch under his breath.
The evening has darkened the sky. Tony and Mitch are outside on Tony's 'show stage' in front of Morelit Hall. There are other students outside throwing football and Frisbee. Others are sitting on blankets reading, talking with friends. Also on the stage area there’s a group of students smoking out of a hookah.
"I think your mom said she was coming up here today? Tony tells Mitch, who upon hearing this is startled then offended.
"What did you say?" asks Mitch
Tony shrugs his shoulders. "Yeah man, she said she is bringing you winter clothes. I told her she should’ve packed your winter clothes because it is always cold here. She got upset. She thought I was questioning her motherhood."
"I feel so sick right now. I feel dizzy."
Tony pulls Mitch's cigarettes from his pocket and hands him one. Mitch slowly lefts it to his lips and lights it while staring at Tony. Tony also grabs a cigarette from Mitch's pack even though his are in his pocket.
"Come on man. Let's go back inside and wait for her to get here," calmly proclaims Tony.
Mitch is showering while Tony is sleeping on his bed staring towards the TV soaking in his numbness.
"Fuck I forgot a towel. Can you hand me one? shouts Mitch from the shower. His request falls miserably upon Tony's deaf ears.
"Can you hand me a mother fucking towel please, you selfish bastard!"
That call awakens Tony.
"Sorry. I am surprised you even showered. The towels are all wet."
"What the fuck. How in the fuck do we not have clean towels?"
"Because you fucking use one then put them in the dirty clothes."
"Yeah that’s what you’re supposed to do. After I get out of the shower and dry off I throw the towel in the dirty clothes. It’s fucking dirty that’s where it goes. Shit!"
"Why don’t you just use one towel for like a week, and then wash it at the end of the week. I mean be honest; you take a shower to get clean. When you get out of the shower you’re clean. I hope. So how does that constitute the
towel being dirty after you use it the one time?"
"That’s just gross. A towel is like a once-it’s-used-it’s-fucking-dirty item. Luckily for fabrics, they can be washed and dried. That still doesn’t explain why we can’t do any fucking laundry around here! Son a bitch!"
"And why are you so worried about a clean damn towel anyways. I sleep with garbage bags and sometimes face down in ditches. I do just fine for myself"
Mitch laughs. "Yes. Yes, you do.”
“I think she wants to meet us at McElroy’s. She says it’s good but I don’t know how she would know.”
Tony puts his usual attire on and walks out of the bathroom where there is a waiting meet at the door with his keys.
The car ride was tense. Tony oblivious and Mitch strangling the wheel with sweating palms and white knuckles. Every turn in the car is over exaggerated and sharp on a dime sending Tony flying across the vehicle and smacking his head against the passenger side window. Mitch, of course, is wearing his safety belt.
“Dude, are you alright? Why are you taking the long way?” Tony questions while rubbing his head.
“Don’t worry about it,” Mitch says monotone as he roughly pulls the car through the parking lot and abruptly parks throwing Tony into the windshield.
McElroy’s is an old fashioned fifties burger joint. The smell of the grille fills the air and once inside the smells of ice cream and milkshakes churns the pangs of hunger even more. Once inside the door, Tony sees the looks and is enjoying the consternation he is getting by conservative older folk trying to recapture their youth or memories. They stare at him. Fear in the eyes of some and other looking at him as if the food is settling wrong. Just as they sit down, Mitch’s mother Julia walks through the door, cigarette and long cigarette holder in hand in the air, which could have been made from a human finger. She struts a pompous strut, standing tall. Her hair is the afterbirth of a bob and a mullet, dyed red. Her bangs curl and end about two inches from the beginning of her scalp. Her cherry apple, blood red lip stick is smeared around her mouth. Her black pea coat is short and ends at her waist which is thin but her ass in huge. She isn’t wearing a shirt underneath it. Her dress shirt falls just short of her knee, panty hose black and ripped. Tony also notices she isn’t wearing any shoes and has a dried black carnation pinned to her lapel.
“You haven’t been partying too much have you?” she says with a smile and a faux Pre Classical Hollywood accent.
“Wow, don’t you look acerbically stunning,” Tony proclaims as he stands with his arms out hoping for a hug. She walks by and sits down on the ripped, red leather booth by the window. The boys follow her. She hasn’t even noticed her son.
“Excuse me, waitress, I will take a vodka and cranberry. It has been a bitch of a day, darling.”
“So how have you been Tony? Have you been taking care of yourself?”
The waitress walks by and doesn’t even stop.
“Oh you know me. I am still just rockin’ and rollin’.”
“Your classes going good? Keeping your grades up?”
“Oh yeah. The best class I have is Philosophy. I’d much rather be enlightened than preached to. I have started thinking about my life more and don’t even realize it. Have you ever thought about life after death? Sometimes I like to think that I will be immortal. That I can’t be killed. I feel like I will live on everyone’s memory, and live forever. But then sometimes I think when I die, everyone else will too and that maybe the world revolves solely around me.”
“Oh dear boy, you seem to have gone mad.”
Julia looks around for her drink. Her order has seemingly evaporated.
“You don’t know the half of it,” chimes Mitch who is staring at the ground.
“Well who the hell knows where my drink is! I paid damn near $1,000 for this outfit last year. I am not doing that shit again.” Her face is getting red and eyes wild with condescension. “It’ll be coming out of your poor ass,” she shouts to the waitress who ignores her.
Tony is doing his best to hold in his laughter. “So how about some pot, Jules?”
“I can’t smoke that anymore. It affects my acting and study immensely. I am studying to portray Helen of Troy in my next production of Dr. Faustus. This is my third try and I will make sure that the papers will notice. Positively that is. I have been reading and reading and reading. Did you know Kip Marlow was gay and could’ve been the real William Shakespeare? The Bard himself,” she says laughing.
“What does that have to do with the play?” says Mitch heatedly. “You do this every time! How many times are you going to keep working on this one project? When are you going to learn that maybe you aren’t a very good writer. Not knowing who you are doesn’t make it easy to be other people! I can’t take this anymore. I have to leave.”
Mitch rises from his chair and storms through the front door, pushing it so hard it smacks the outside wall. Tony stares the whole time not understanding where the outburst has arisen.
A well dressed man walks over to Tony’s table, nervous and constantly looking back at his wife who is both sickened. “Excuse me son, but I would like to tell you that you’re scaring my wife and I don’t think you should be here.” the café has gotten quiet. The patrons have stopped eating and rose from their plates. The manager is standing at the bar slowly wiping down the counter. Julia is still looking around for her drink or the waitress.
“No, no excuse me you impolite stooge. You heathen. I am reconnecting with an old friend. I wouldn’t come to your table and bother you! You can tell your wife she can take your red basket, hamburgers and fries and shove them up your ass and dance around like a mutant caveman for all I care.”
“Old friend? Son there. . .”
“Does it matter who it is? Get away from my table! No one comes to the King’s table and speaks without being spoken to. You and all these old people in this place need to realize I am the new human. You wouldn’t understand because it is beyond your closed mindedness. Open up your eyes and watch as I go further than you all and leave you all behind.”
“My drink is never going to get here. That’s why I hate college restaurants. The waitresses don’t work. They just want a free tip,” declares Julia who slides off the booth ready to leave.
“I will see her out one night and give her a tip and then some,” quips Tony. Upon hearing this, the well dressed man’s wife gasps in ill horror. “Oh stop, you idiot. How will it make you feel when I say I am going to leave here and do drugs and raze your town to the ground?”
Tony raises his arms in victory, walking backwards, mule kicking out the door with Julia following, holding her cigarette and hollowed out human bone cigarette holder.
The people are stunned and sickened beyond belief. Then go back to eating as if it didn’t happen.
Candle light flickers around Mitch’s dorm room. The power has blown. The windows are opened and a light gusts of wind slice through the window screens causing the flames to dance around the room. On the floor is an opened case of Budweiser. Tony reaches into the case and takes one, then two, and starts pounding beers while Mitch sits sulking on his bed and his mom digging through a clothe bag.. There is knocking at the door, in walks Bryan, back from the dead.
“Dude, what the fuck is up? How you feeling?” slurs Tony.
“Man, I’m alive,” says Bryan in a strained and raspy voice.
“Barely. Bring us anything good?”
“Of course. Let’s hit the room up.”
Bryan leads the way out of the room, Mitch following and Tony behind him. As Tony is about to cross the threshold from his room to the hallways, a hand grabs him violently on the shoulder and pulls back into the room.
“Tony, come here,” says Julia softly
Tony stares into the room as Julia fades back into the room. ”Hey hold on a second I forgot something,” he shouts up to Mitch and Bryan. “What’s up?” he asks Julia.
“You wanted to smoke didn’t you?
“
Huh? I didn’t think you did?”
“I got a bowl pack right here. I need to smoke before I get back to the hotel.”
“Um, yeah. I have a piece over here.”
Tony walks over to his closet and gets a shoe box off the top shelf. Inside the box is a homemade bong made from a human skull, stolen from a biology lab classroom. They enjoy a few hits back and forth. They are sitting by the window and blowing the smoke out. Tony’s eyes are blood red and almost closed.
“Tell me your dreams,” says Julia with a chest full of smoke.
“I don’t think you or I want to go there.”
“Everyone has them. I have wanted to be a painter, writer, actor, photographer and taxidermist.”
“I don’t really want to say it is kind of embarrassing.”
“The only thing embarrassing about dreams is not acting on them.”
Tony picks of the human skull bong and stand up looking out the window.
“Do you see that out there, through the trees? He says pointing towards his stage. “I want to perform there. I want to be able to go out there, with thousands of people looking at me, hooked like fish on a line to every word that spits from my mouth. Words and messages of freedom and rebellion. Of life and death. I want to be their leader. The one they look to rise above the filth, the fury. They will chant. They will scream. I will be them and they will be me. We are all one in this you know? I will feed on all of their forgotten thoughts and all of their deepest, darkest desires. A subconscious illusion. I will be the embodiment of what they always wanted to be. The embodiment of the revolution that they want but are afraid to start.” He lifts the human skull bong to his face. Eye to eye. Talking to it. “They need me. I am the one without fear. I am the one who knows the methods that will bring this Institution to its knees. The Institution will be weak and obsolete. Then the institution will look up at me with tears of blood dribbling down its cheek, shaking from a terror it never thought could exist. A terror is works so hard to keep down, keep quiet. Keep in control! And I will look down at the Institution. It will beg me for its life. Its voice cracking.” He is squeezing the jaw of the bong. It breaks. “I will tell the Institution that I will let it live, only long enough to see the new race take the reigns. Then I will set it ablaze. And put the fire out with an ax.”
“And what happens when the people you lead feel they have the strength or courage to challenge the messiah? The battle lines having been leveled.”
“Then I will have already given them the means by which they can destroy me as well.”
He sends a suspecting look then laughs uncontrollably.
Tony is stumbling down the hallway. His head is held high. Because he is high, very high. Whatever the old hag had was exceedingly intoxicating and potent. People walk by, see him and just stare. He doesn’t ever acknowledge. He is their leader and too cool right now. His head is in the sky. Tony comes to Bryan’s door and walks in, but no one is there except Dale. Dale looks at him jealous.
“Damn, son. You look high as shit.”
“Yeah. Where’d they go?”
“They? Bryan’s outside. Want to smoke that cig?”
“I sure do.”
Bryan and Mitch are already outside on the brick barrier in the smoking spot behind Morelit Hall, finishing their smokes.
“You look powerful stoned,” says Mitch.
“Yeah bro. I am totally wide open.
“Well I got my own shit, bro,” chimes Bryan.
“Pills?”
“Oh yeah.”
“They good too.”
“Let’s get on it! Why are we wasting time?”
“Already did. I’m feeling good.”
“You selfish bastard.”
“You’re high enough as it is.”
Tony takes a look around. Smiling, oblivious. Enlightened
The creatures of the nighttime world begin crawling about the streets, all with one common goal: getting drunk. Girls are no longer wearing skirts and heels. The substitution is jeans, Ugg boots, and sweaters. But Radcliffes’ girls are the finest, and easiest. Sex drips off them all leaving the scent behind to be tracked by the dogs. The guy’s lust for these girls is so noticeable it is sickening. They follow the girls about helplessly.
A crowd of people are gathered along the side entrance door.
“Call that fucker, I’m not paying or waiting in line,” scowls Tony.
Dale pulls his phone out and dials. Suddenly out comes Scheft. Walking like Charlie Chaplin and talking with a lisp.
“Good thing you guys called, you wouldn’t have gotten in,” says Scheft, lisp and all.
“This dude is always trying make himself more important than he actually is,” Tony turns and whispers to Mitch.
“Yeah, we think he’s a closet queer,” responds Mitch.
“Yes we sure do.”
“Come on guys, lets go downstairs the party just started a few minutes ago,” lisps Scheft.
Tony stares at Scheft’s face, noticing something odd.
“Are you wearing make-up?” asks Tony.
Sheft looks around at everyone, embarrassed. They are waiting for an answer.
“I have bad acne scars,” he stammers. He quickly leads them down the stairs, which are dark and wet from beer, moisture, piss whatever else.
The basement is big in comparison with others. There are two stations where you can get beer, the left corner of the room on the far side and the right side of the room by the door.
Girls are dancing in the middle with guys and other girls. The sound waves exit the speakers and flow through the bodies of the partiers. Random people are making out. Beers are being drunk everywhere.
Tony and his disciples are all tore up. All are chugging their drinks. Then after chugging a few, the shotguns begin. A joint finds its way around, which all smoke except Mitch. Tony notices a group of guys and a couple girls passing around a mirror with a fine white powder. He brazenly walks over to help himself to some. He grabs the little straw from an unsuspecting girl and snorts her line. Then the one beside it. He drops the straw back on the mirror, “Carry on,” he says with a wink and a grin. He walks back to his group who never realized he was gone.
The party is over. Tony and Mitch are walking around the back of Morelit Hall on the sidewalk; Tony’s walk is more of a staggering, hammered styled walk. Laughing at nothing. On the brick barrier by the door are a black dude and a white dude, both smoking a large joint.
“You boys smoke?” calls out the black dude, noticing their condition.
“Fucking aye. Mitch tells this man that’s a really stupid question,” says Tony.
“Try this then, homie,” says the black dude who extends his hand. Without a second’s hesitation, Tony grabs the blunt and takes a huge hit and holds it in for a second. He exhales and the high washes over him like a wave.
“That’s some good shit, huh?” proudly proclaims the black dude, nodding his head and smiling.
“Oh god damn. Wicked.”
They all begin to laugh.
Tony can only stand hunched over with his arms held at 45 degree angles and wrists limp. He can’t move. Vegetating. Still laughing.
“Yo, where you sleep at?” the black dude calls to Tony.
“Where do I sleep?” he answers nervously. “In my bed.”
“Nah, man, your room number.”
Tony laughs in relief. “301.”
“Word. Let me get your number, here be mines. I always got good shit. Hit me up anytime.”
“You keep getting shit like this; you’ll be in business and in my good graces for along time.”
“Word. Word. We out. Hit me up.”
“Later.”
Tony is locked in his position. He lit a cigarette but he never took a puff and it’s almost burned out.
“You alright? What the fuck are you doing?” asks Mitch, slightly worried.
“Yeah,” responds Tony, slowly and slurred.
Tony struggles t
o rifle through his pockets trying to find the missing key card.
“Fuck, how are we going to get in?” Mitch says looking around. “Come on man, let’s go.”
Mitch starts walking, but Tony isn’t with him. Mitch turns around and sees Tony still slouched over but trying to walk. He’s walking as if his shoes are cinder blocks. He appears to be talking to himself also.
“Come on you asshole, we need to get inside before you get caught and in trouble,” yells Mitch.
Tony stops and can’t hold back his laughter. The sight of Mitch trying to be authoritative is too much. They continue down the sidewalk trying to find someone to let them in the building. Mitch is still ahead of Tony who is still having a hard time moving and it still at wits with himself. They round the front of the building and Mitch thinks he sees someone at the front desk. Tony tries desperately to jump and wave his arm to be noticed, but gets about an inch of the ground. He isn’t calling for help, he can’t stop geeking out.
“Dude seriously, be quiet!”
As Tony comes closer to Mitch, he’s sees another hyper active smile, this one on his friends face, sliced on by a serrated blade. Tony stares at his friend, scared. His eyes cut again see if it’s real. He slowly reaches to touch his face when suddenly-
“There’s Ally dude!” says Mitch relieved.
“I did it!” cheers Tony
Ally, a thick, frat girl, walks up to the door to let them in. She isn’t surprised.
Tony stumbles inside as she lets them in. She’s not happy but laughs at his state of being.
“You are always out, why don’t you ever come get me?” she asks.
“Sorry, love, taking one girl out would decimate my game. Got any food?” responds Tony.
“You have no game,” says Mitch displeased.
They walk upstairs to Ally’s room which is almost completely pink and covered in her sororities slogan, motto. Her roommate, Kathy, is in bed. She had been out earlier. Tony hops in bed with her.
“Get out of my bed, you fucking asshole! You smell like a cigarette.” rips Kathy.
“Where’s the food?” asks Mitch.
Tony finally gets out of bed with a jokers grin.
“You have to leave. We’re about to go to bed,” says Ally who doesn’t really want them to leave.
“I need a cigarette,” says Mitch.
“Shit, you know what? Never mind I’m just going to go to bed. Call it a night,” says Tony, rather abruptly.
Kathy just stares as Tony leaves taking all of his smells with him.
Tony is in the kitchen making a late night snack. College gourmet: ramen noodles. He notices his hands are shaking and twitching. He thinks nothing of it. As he takes his noodles out of the microwave, he leaves the kitchen he sees Kathy walking down the hall dragging a small blanket behind her.
“Looking for a place to stay?” he asks.
“Yes.”
Tony just nods and leads her into the room. Kathy climbs into Tony’s bed and starts taking off her clothes. Tony hasn’t noticed.
“So how about a movie?”
Tony turns and sees Kathy naked. Her look of displeasure from earlier is wiped away by her mysterious horniness.
“I don’t have any.” He undoes his belt and jumps in bed with her. He slowly and sensually creeps up to her. He kisses down her neck. Her chest. Her undefined stomach. He gets home, He screams! Her vagina is covered in buzz saws and razor blades. They hiss and slice. He throws himself into the wall still screaming.
She is terrified as well. “What’s wrong?” she asks, covering herself back up.
Tony is panting heavily. He tries to call himself down. “I’m sorry. You had buzz saw on your vagina.”
“What?” she says angry and confused.
Tony begins to laugh. “Oh, it is probably nothing.” He jumps back on top of her.
Tony walks outside and Mitch and Ally are still out there. Bryan has joined also.
“I thought you two were fucking?”
“Who? Us?” asks Bryan, taken back.
“What? No!”
Ally takes a look at Tony, and then her eyes brighten, she has found out something shocking.
“Uh oh,” she says. “You just slept with someone, didn’t you?
“No. She could only be so lucky. Sorry I am lying yes I did. I railed your roommate.”
“Oh. Good. Because, you know, she’s in my sorority and she sleeps with just about anyone.”
“So does he,” quickly interrupts Mitch.
“Watch this,” says Bryan, who walks over to Tony and quickly unzips his jacket to expose his pale, sunken in, bare chest. There are also scratches and cuts all over him. “There’s your answer!” he proudly proclaims.
Tony stands awestruck. Mitch laughs hysterically, and Ally walks back inside pissed off and disgusted.
“The things you do to yourself,” says Mitch shaking his head.
Tony is looking around in the bathroom for something. He looks scared. Moving with a quickened pace and knocking over everything on the counter top. He pulls out a bottle of mouthwash and acne pads from the cabinet. Tony pours the mouthwash on his penis and it falls into the toilet. He then grabs the pads and starts wiping his shaft. Feeling as though he hasn’t done enough, he finds rubbing alcohol and continues to pour. He soaks cotton balls and starts to wipe. Finally, he grabs a Q-Tip and stares long and hard at it. He dips the cotton end into the rubbing alcohol. He inserts the Q-Tip into himself and lets out a harsh, loud and coarse scream, enough to rip the paint of the walls and shatters the windows. He removes the Q-Tip which has a small trace of blood on the end. He throws it into the toilet and flushes.
He takes a long look at himself in the mirror. He is breathing heavily. His eyes a dark and sunken. His cheek bones are starting to become more evident. His hands are still shaking. He splashes water on his face, wipes his eyes and exit’s the bathroom.
Tony and Mitch find themselves in their Geology lab, tapping small rocks with a rock hammer.
“That chick won’t even look at you anymore,” whispers Mitch.
“Which one?”
“The one that took you home awhile ago. The one who almost killed you. She won’t even look over here.”
The girl is hard at her lab with her lab partner.
“Speaking of girls you fuck and don’t talk to again, Kathy’s brother is coming up this weekend. She wants us to show him around town.”
“She hates me.”
“You think?”
“I mean, she should’ve known.”
“You never cease to amaze me. I think no matter what, your mind can turn something around and blame someone else for what you have done.”
“She was warned. I fucking told her.”
I’m sure she appreciated that. Even though I know for a fact you said nothing. Regardless, she said he was a cool dude. She’s said he’s bringing some good reefer too.”
“Reefer? Those had to be her words or somehow you a pot head or a cop. Count me out though. I told my mom that I’d come home this weekend to get some clothes. She keeps telling me she wants to visit.
“You won’t let her?”
“Are you kidding me? She’d die. I already feel like I’m wasting her money. She doesn’t need to see what I am. “
“I don’t think her money is the only thing wasting away.”
Tony lets this roll of, almost proud of it. He turns and takes another looks back at the girl who is still working hard with her lab partner.
The water is running in the sink. A powerful snort is heard. Again. Tony lifts his head up and stares into the mirror. His eyes bloodshot. Powder around his nose. He stares at himself in the mirror for awhile looking into his own eyes. He looks down at his body which is starting to change. The tone he had at the beginning of the semester is dwindling away. He splashes water in his face. Looks at himself in the mirror again then leaves.
Other than noticing the pink walls, Tony did not pay too
much attention to Ally and Kathy’s room. It was a typical college girl’s room decorated with pictures of friends, old and new. Clothes scattered about, some clean others dirty. And shoes, damn the shoes are everywhere. There’s a tension in the room as Tony and Kathy share the room together with Mitch and Kathy’s brother, Reese. Tony is getting irritable, while Kathy does homework on her laptop. Tony is standing at the other side of the room with his arms crossed and looking down at the floor.“We’ll be at the bomb shelter,” he mumbles.
“I like that place,” says Kathy without taking her eyes off of her work.
“Let’s go fuckers!” shouts Bryan from outside.
“Later guys,” says Kathy, again not looking away from her work.
They exit out the door. Tony brings up the rear. They exchange a disgusted look.
“Bye Tony.”
Tony, continues walking away, flipping her off.
The Bomb Shelter is a frat house on light side. The upstairs looks like that of a normal college house, although there is a beer pong table in the small kitchen with rules scribbled all over the wall in permanent marker. When the boys walk in the guy that lives there takes out his pet snake and puts it on the floor and it slithers around scaring people.
The guys all shotgun a beer and proceed to the down stairs, to the ‘bomb shelter.’ Once downstairs; Tony’s hair gets him noticed, by girls, as always, almost immediately. They move to get beers. A couple of girls walk up.
“You are out all the time. Your grades have to suck,” says one of the girls. Tony can tell she’s a girl by her voice, but can’t see her from the poor lighting.
“No. I’m a fucking genius,” he responds.
“I dig your look. Are you in a band?” says a different girl.
“No doubt, babe. These are the roadies. I’m a rock star, girl. I’ve been arrested and everything.”
The other guys play along with the ruse.
“Fuck yeah. I’m this man’s roadie no matter what. The man has pipes,” bellows Bryan.
“You sing?” says the first girl.
“Yep. I’m the fucking King of Oblivion.”
“Do you write you own songs and stuff?” asks one of the girls.
“Every day. I’m a hell of a writer. I wrote a song yesterday about the first time I got arrested.”
“I want to see!” she says, excitedly.
“Maybe one day you will see and hear it. Then you will live it and breathe it. “
A group of four rocker looking dudes walk by Tony and don’t even acknowledge he is there. These guys are actually in a band. They have on their flannel shirts, skinny black jeans with manufactured holes in the knees, and shaggy hair styled with soft hands. They look to the girls and they look back and smile.
“Oh my god that’s those guys who are playing at BT’s tonight,” says one of the girls.
“Really?” says the first girl.
“Yes oh my god let’s go! See you guys.” Says the others.
“Are you fucking kidding me? Really? Those dudes sounds as plastic as they look. They are just a fashion statement. They are just mannequins styled from a post-grunge emo thrift store.”
Tony watches them go out the door. His look is of anger and jealousy. His hands are starting to shake again and a slight ringing in his ears comes into being.
The guys are hanging out outside Bryan’s room in the hallway making lots of noise, drunk, laughing.
“You ever seen this shit, man,” says Bryan. He pulls his lighter out and flicks the flame up and holds is under a university flier on the wall. The corner catches flame and then he smacks the flame. The paper sticks to the wall. They look at the paper in stoned amazement.
“That shit is tight.” He does it again but to a different piece of paper.
“You going to smoke?” says Tony, jittery and anxious.
“No, I’m going to bed. I’ll meet up with you tomorrow.”
Bryan walks to his door but Tony catches him before he gets there.
“Think I can get a few more of them pills man? I ran out before we went out tonight.”
“No I have to get more at the pharmacy Monday.”
“Ok that’s cool, man. Just let me know.”
Bryan enters his room and shuts the room.
Tony stands there unsure of what to do. He walks back down to his room and stops at the door. He pulls his lighter from his pocket and stares at it. He looks at all the colorful, fluorescent fliers festooning the egg white walls.
“Tony, what the hell are you doing?” asks Mitch cautiously.
“I think I am going to try that thing Bryan did with the lighter and the flier.”
“No! You will burn the damn place to the ground.
As soon as Mitch comes at Tony to make him stop, the paper is on fire and catches quickly. The whole paper is on fire. Mitch takes his shirt off and fans the flames. The egg white wall has char residue.
“Oh man! That could’ve been bad,” says Tony, laughing maniacally.
As they turn to go into the room, the fire alarm begins to ring. The sound is loud and piercing. They cover their ears. Water begins to spray from the ceiling.
“Maybe it’s going to get bad. Fire! Fire!” yells Tony, running and jumping around, still laughing.
People begin to run out of their room, still drowsy, frightened. Tony leads the way down the stairs. He is still laughing.
“Follow me to freedom!” he says.
They burst out of the dorm door all at once. People are yelling and screaming in terror. Some are falling to the ground and getting trampled.
Students who were sleeping are now awake and pissed off and curious. Tony can see through the lighted windows that people are frantically scurrying to the fire exits out of the building. Tony is laughing while Mitch and Reese are a little more scared and understand the situation a little better.
All the students are gathered outside talking and wondering what is going on. The fire alarm is still heard and still piercing. Fire trucks, police cars, and ambulances arrive at the scene. None of the residents are dressed for the night cold. It’s biting and there’s a light drizzle to make matters worse.
The three guys are huddled together outside.
“The alarm took forever to go off. I saved a lot of people this evening. Do you think they noticed? For their sake I hope so.” says Tony looking at all of the wet students, shivering.
“Yeah,” answers Mitch looking down at the ground
“That wasn’t me, man, couldn’t have been me. It-it couldn’t have.”
“You lit the fucking paper on fire!” says Mitch with silent aggression.
“So did Bryan, man!”
“Shit.”
“What is going on? I don’t understand. It wasn’t supposed to end this way. There is no resistance.”
The crowd has grown larger now with not only Morelit Hall residents, but other students as well.
“Does this mean we’re not smoking?” asks Tony.
Tony is lying in bed, hair still wet from the rain and sprinklers that went off in the building. There is a white powder residue on his nose and lips. The trash bag bed sheets are pulled up to his neck. He is shivering or twitching. He begins to mumble to himself, “I didn’t do. I didn’t- I didn’t do it. I really didn’t do it. I d-didn’t do it. I didn’t do. I didn’t- I didn’t do it. I really didn’t do it. I d-didn’t do it. Ha I know I did not do it. It wasn’t me man, it wasn’t me. Ah I knew it was not me, I just knew it,” he says laughing comfortably.
Tony stands on the stage at night. He is holding an unplugged microphone. He looks around for his people. They are nowhere to be found. He thinks he can hear their voices, their cries, and their pain. He runs down a desolate street looking for them. His feet start to sink into the ground. Deeper and deeper with every step. He sees the lights from the University. It is fading and getting further and further away. He panics, and then looks back and sees the fully formed monster. He has changed.
Tony stands in awe. In the middle of the dirty street is a pulverized and bludgeoned monster lying face down, covered in blood, mud, water and bruises. The man slowly attempts to left himself. He cannot. His breathing sounds wheezy and gets louder and louder. Somehow it seems as if an invisible force lifts him underneath his arm pits and to his feet. His head hangs on his chest. He takes his first disjointed step looking like a small calf having just been born. His legs are shaking as he cannot support the weight of his frail body. Blood drips from the pulverized man and onto the street. The street, which is already covered in his blood, is overflowing the vents. Another step. Then another. He comes towards Tony, one shaky and grotesque step at a time. Tony cannot take his eyes off of him. He cannot make out one distinguishable characterization of the face because it is so beaten and swollen. As he gets close enough for Tony to touch him he reaches for him, as if to ask for assistance. Tony’s stomach is tied in knots and flipping around his abdomen. He can feel something rising in his esophagus. Teeth begin falling out of this man’s mouth as he tries to talk. Then he crumbles to the ground at Tony’s feet. His wheezing finally stopped. The scar begins to ooze blood. He tears at his eyes once more to see.
Tony tries to run back towards his dorm. His feet still sink into the ground with every step. His dorm is getting further and further away. He reaches his arm to try and grab the University and pull it closer. He panics. He falls to the ground crying. He looks back and the monster has vanished.
III
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